It's been a long time since I've posted a new chapter. Oh well! By the way, I have eight reviews! (OMG) And not a single one appeared to be a flame! That's a new record. Especially since most of my stories suck (that people I know have read). Also, I'm working on two new fics so I don't know when they'll be out or when Chapter 8 (this chapter's a two-parter) of Pee Wee Herman's Great Adventure will be out. Oh, and this is the longest chapter yet, so I had to make two chapters. Enjoy Chapter 6 if you decide to skip this, my comment below, the dedication, or the warning (I suggest not to skip the warning though).
About the Roxanne thing, Yoshizilla, did you mean when Pee Wee commented that he thought he saw a penguin? Because that wasn't Roxanne, it was the nun that appeared earlier. It was sort of a reference to The Blues Brothers, an old film I saw sometime ago, because Jake and Elwood called the nun "The Penguin" and ended up being beaten with a ruler. It's a great movie, and I advise anyone reading to watch it (especially anyone who likes random dancing in a church, a crazed lady with a flamethrower, or someone who just likes a skinny guy and his fat brother trying to save a church by getting their old band back together).
I WAS going to dedicate this chapter to my third reviewer, Sorrowful-Ragdoll, but I changed my mind and decided to dedicate it to my review box, for its wonderful reviews.
WARNING: For some reason this chapter came out very perverted in my opinion, so if you don't like that sorta stuff it might be a good idea to just turn away or view some not-as-vulgar random fic. And has anyone noticed my chapters seem to get more corrupted as they go on?
Pee Wee Herman's Pokémon Adventure
Chapter 6
"This will be a one-on-one Pokémon battle between the challenger, Pee Wee Herman of Pallet Town, and the gym leader, Misty Waterflower of Cerulean City! Water Pokémon only, no time-limit! Start!" some referee guy refereed.
"I don't know how you ended up in Cerulean so fast, but I'm gonna wipe you out!" Misty stated, pulling out a Poke Ball. "And then I'll finally be able to give this sorry excuse of a Gym back to my stupid sisters and travel with Ash!" She eyed her ditzy siblings chatting about nothing on the sidelines.
"Okey-dokey," Pee Wee answered. Misty called out Starmie, a purple starfish with a brilliant red jewel shimmering in its center. Pee Wee didn't do anything.
"What are you waiting for? Send out your Pokémon!" Misty ordered impatiently. Pee Wee stood there staring at her, before a large bulge popped out in his pants. Misty turned green, before hastily trying to look at something else.
"I don't even—ugh—want to know…" she said, watching the referee hold up his green and red flags edgily.
"Send out your Pokémon now before you forfeit this battle!" the referee screamed at Pee Wee.
"I was warming up," Pee Wee grinned pervertedly, before shoving his hands down his pants and pulling out—Wee Wee.
"What the—!" Misty exclaimed in surprise as a dead fish Pokémon was thrown into the air and onto the ground. "A… Magikarp?" Suddenly the lights dimmed as Misty started reminiscing about the good ol' days. "Team Rocket had a Magikarp. I remember when they always used to steal our Pokémon… then Ash blasted them off with Pikachu's Thunderbolt…"
"Hahahahaha! Did somebody say 'Team Rocket'?" Jessie asked, appearing out of nowhere.
"Maybe Wee Wee's dreaming about Ash," Pee Wee said randomly. "I sure wish I had dreams about Ash."
"The twerp?" James commented, his shadow illuminating beside Jessie's.
"Just get on wit da motto!" Meowth shouted irritably.
"Prepare for trouble," Jessie started, standing on a podium with her arms crossed.
"And make it double," James added, standing beside her.
"To protect the world from masturbation!"
"To unite all seducers in mass desperation!"
"To denounce the evils of sex and love!"
"To extend our reach to the strippers above!"
"Jessie!"
"James."
"Team Rocket fucks off at the speed of—WAIT A MINUTE!" Jessie interrupted.
"Surrender your condoms now or prepare to indulge in the pleasures of spite—" James was rewarded with a smack of a fan.
"I said wait a minute, you idiot!"
"Oww…" James muttered, rubbing the bump on his head.
"Wobbuffet!" Wobbuffet said, forcefully coming out of his Pokeball. Jessie whacked him in the head as well. "Wooobbb…"
"What gives?" Meowth demanded, appearing out of the shadows, angry he didn't get to recite his line.
"Who the hell changed our motto?" she asked, looking through a pile of scripts.
"Well," Meowth started, looking at a report, "da ratings were goin' down and da fans were rioting about our boring characters so da writers decided to spice da motto up a bit and give us new lines!"
"But why are they all sex-oriented?" James asked in puzzlement.
"It says here dat 'cause younger people are now more interested in dat stuff, dey'll actually stick around to watch da show." Meowth put the paper down. "'Sides," he added, "dat kind of stuff always stimulates a certain part of da body, and people apparently like dat." He glanced toward his partners. "Makes me wonder why I always stick around wit you perverted humans."
"So that's why?" Jessie asked. She looked towards James, who just sat on the ground in pain. "Works for me," she shrugged.
"Why don't you just go away and arouse some sexually-deprived souls in a strip club instead of us, Team Rocket?" Misty asked, intervening in their conversation.
"Booooo," Meowth replied to her comeback, giving her a thumbs-down.
"Humph, I didn't care about your stupid motto anyway," Misty muttered, turning away.
"Meowth has thumbs?" James asked, sitting in thought.
"Ooh-la-la," everyone heard Pee Wee say, and turned to find him flipping through a Playboy magazine.
"You're worse than ASH!" Misty screamed, slamming a mallet against Pee Wee's crotch.
"So the twerp's not here," Jessie said, looking around. She spotted Pee Wee looking in his pants at a certain numb, smashed-up area, but then detected Misty's sisters fighting over the Playboy magazine. She turned to her teammates. James was meditating, trying to find an answer to life, while Meowth sat reading crude tossed-aside scripts. She could hear Misty in the distance destroying her Gym in a blinding rage, and Jessie sat down on the floor, wrapping her arms around her knees.
"Why am I surrounded by idiots? Why? Why me?" she kept muttering to herself.
"I've finally found a reason why we exist Jessie! I FINALLY FOUND A REASON!" James screamed, standing up from his cross-legged position.
"Huh?" Meowth turned. "Why's dat?"
"It's simple really. We, Team Rocket, were created for comic-relief in a show called Pokémon that was developed to advertise the games in a seemingly endless series that has esculated in fame over the past few years because of a cycle of new features and new characters appearing every season." There was silence, before Meowth scowled.
"WE ALREADY KNEW DAT YOU IDIOT!" James fell from the sudden outburst and crawled into a corner near Pee Wee. His arms embraced his legs as he steadily mumbled about his failed life, rocking himself in depression.
Jessie stood up. "Well, time to send out the Team Rocket Mecha!"
Misty's homicidal fury subsided and she commented angrily. "Oh great, what's it this time? The Team Rocket Vacuuming Machine of Doom 3000?"
"Precisely!" Jessie laughed, using James's line because he was obviously suffering in a state of misery.
"I'm guessing it's the same exact thing you used when Ash and I were battling here, years ago?"
"You must be psychic," Jessie remarked. "But you won't know what hit you once I set this to Auto-Suck!" She turned the machine on and the vacuum started to drain all of the water in a pool that had just randomly materialized, as well as Starmie, Daisy, Lily, Violet, James, Wobbuffet, and Meowth.
"Dis wasn't part of da plaaaaan!" Meowth screeched, his claws scraping against the metal as he was sucked in.
"Hahaha!" Jessie cackled.
"You won't be laughing after I send out some of my Pokémon to destroy that stupid robot!" Misty retorted with pure determination. She twirled in place, before pitching a Poke Ball in the air. "Go, Azurill!"
"Azur!" Azurill squeaked, smiling cutely at the face of the mecha. "Azurilllll!" it screamed as it was horridly vacuumed up into the massive robot.
"Azurill! Nooo!" Misty wept, falling to her knees. Pee Wee turned to the robot.
"That's a big sucker," Pee Wee said, "I wonder if it wants to play with Wee Wee." He tossed the fish into the machine.
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A/N: Don't be led astray, Chapter 7 will include what happens next so I won't start out with a random beginning next time.
For those concerned about any "plagiarism" within Team Rocket's motto, ("To protect the world from masturbation,"), I just wanted to say that the word 'masturbation' was the only idea that popped into my head, and I'm sorry if my story has to use your line. I'm only noting this because I've read a few perverted Pokémon fics with Team Rocket in them, and I remember that Jessie's first line sometimes included "To protect the world from masturbation." Again, I'm sorry if you were offended that I "stole" your idea, but I couldn't think of anything else that would fit.
