It was that time of the year again. Sleigh bells, carolers, snow, presents, and Santa. To Thomas Collins it was a blessing and curse at the same time. It was the day his life was turned around, the day he realized that love did exist in the world, and someone was put on the earth just to love him. So, although he lost Angel…he could never hate the holiday. Halloween…that was easier, but never the day they met.
He got into a habit. He didn't tell anyone about it, really. They would probably send him off to a shrink or feel the need to join him. But he wanted to be alone…and just remember.
Collins walked slowly into the alley. His favorite alley. Collins took a seat down where he had fallen years ago. Practically unconscious from the beating. Bleeding, confused, and cold.
"You ok, honey?" Collins heard the wind whispered mimicking his voice. A small smile spread across his lips.
"I'm afraid so." He answered quietly. Then he would watch the space in front of him, imagine Angel's form bending down and offering him all he could. A warm meal, a cloth to clean his wounds, and unbeknownst to the both of them at the time, eternal love.
Collins let his eyes fall down to see the snow on the ground. For minutes, he sat in silence remembering. Then he looked up and sighed. Now was always the worse part of his habit. He'd walk away…and he wouldn't come back til the next year. Then once again he'd feel a warmth that nothing on earth could give him.
He pushed himself up slowly and regained his balance. Pushing his hands into his pockets, he headed towards the street. A cold breeze came suddenly, pushing Collins back into the alley, "What the…" He mumbled feeling pressure on the back of his neck. Turning around quickly he saw nothing. Just the empty alley. "That's…odd."
Then he heard a sound. Collins looked in its general direction, it was coming from the dumpster. Cautiously, he took steps towards it trying to place where he had heard that sound before. All he knew was that it was something living and something unhappy.
Collins lifted the top of the dumpster revealing a blanket rolled up. It was placed on top of all of the garbage…almost carefully.
"Oh God." Collins whispered. He leaned over and pulled out the bundle. It was cold…colder than it should have been. Collins unwrapped the blanket to reveal a crying baby. It couldn't have been very old as its face was still riddled with yellow wrinkles. Without even thinking, he opened his jacket and slipped the baby under it. Warmth was what it needed.
"Angel…please let me help." Collins whispered as he ran out of the alley holding the baby close. Soon the baby stopped crying.
Reaching the Emergency room was easier than he had thought. It was Christmas Day in New York City…yet somehow the roads he took were clear.
"Excuse me." Collins muttered going right up to the nurses desk.
The nurse held up her hand, "You have to wait your turn. Just like everyone else. What's your emergency?" The woman asked in a monotone voice. It definitely didn't sound like she was at all concerned.
Collins gulped and pulled the baby out of his jacket, "I found this…in a dumpster."
The nurse sighed deeply and glanced up, "What is it…oh…." She froze for a moment and then grabbed the intercom, "Dr. Vossler to emergency right away." The woman dropped the device and ran around the counter gathering the baby from Collins' arms.
"Is it yours?" She asked running down the halls.
Collins followed her, "No...like I said I found it. I heard it crying."
"I don't understand these mothers." The nurse mumbled, "You drop a baby off at a hospital or fire department…no questions asked…" She shook her head in disgust.
A man came running down to meet the nurse, "What do we got, Mel?"
"Dumpster baby." The nurse answered bringing the baby into a room.
Collins took a step forward and Mel shook her head, "Wait in the waiting room."
So he did. He paced back and forth, biting his nails as he did. What he really needed was a joint to calm his nerves. But something in him doubted that the hospital would look too happily on his drug habit. So all he could do was pace.
"There you are." Mel, the nurse, said with a tired sigh, "Seems like you're a hero. If you didn't find…well…the baby's fine…slightly jaundiced but that's normal for babies."
Collins smiled deeply finally standing still, "That's great."
"And you said you didn't know anything about the baby's origin? I'm sorry we just have to be clear." The nurse explained.
Collins shook his head, "Oh no it's ok. No I just found…"
"Him." Mal supplied. "He's a boy."
"Him. I found him." Collins smiled, "So…what's going to happen to him?"
"He'll be taken care of by a foster mother and then hopefully adopted one day." Mel said with a smile, "Do you have any interest in adopting? You held him like a natural."
Collins hung his head for a moment and then said, "I wish I could…but I don't have the...I have AIDS…it wouldn't be fair for me to take him for a year and then…force him back out again…"
The nurse nodded frowning at the new information. But she tried to pass it along as nothing special, "That's fine, sir. You just seemed so interested. You did a good thing." She said holding onto his arm for a moment. Then Mel looked around the room and turned to Collins, "Would you like to see him?"
"Can…" Collins stuttered, "Can I do that?"
Mel took his hand, "If anyone asks you're…an uncle." She said struggling. Since the baby was white it would be hard to convince doctors that Collins was his father. He followed her trying to calm the heavy beating of his heart.
"Here he is." She said quietly bringing Collins into a room filled with babies in see through boxes. Collins gulped going up to the baby he found. The newborn was breathing gently.
"The box…is he, ok?" Collins asked scared to hear the answer.
Mel nodded, "He'll be fine. We're giving him some meds to make him warm and get rid of the jaundice…which like I said earlier…is normal. He'll be fine. Thanks to you." Collins pressed his hand to the plastic watching the simple rise and fall of the baby's chest. "Here…you can hold his hand. Use those holes." Mel instructed him.
"What if I…I'm real big…" Collins mumbled with fear in his eyes.
Mel laughed lightly, "You won't break him I promise…go ahead."
Collins licked his lips and slowly pushed his hand through to meet with the baby's tiny fist. "Unbelievable…." He whispered. The baby's fist was the size of Collins' thumbnail. "We all start off like this don't we? Innocent…beautiful."
"Yes…we do." Mel patted his back, "Would…would you like to name him?"
Collins glanced back at her only for a moment. Then he looked back at the baby, "Am I allowed to do that?"
"I can't guarantee it will stick with the foster parents but he does need to be called something. Do you have any ideas?" She asked him letting a smile spread across her face.
"Umm…sure." Collins took a deep breath. It only took him a moment to find the perfect name, "Gabriel. You can call him Gabriel." The baby wiggled closer to Collins hand.
"Like the angel?" Mel asked.
"Yeah…." Collins whispered watching baby Gabriel, "Like the angel."
Post: What I said about hospitals taking in babies no questions asked is true. So please…use it if you need to.
