AN: Guys... I'm having way too much fun writing this story. I'm already at the D, D, and more D, episode.
The day started out pretty normally, the sky was clear, and the sun with shining. Mike had been returning from a walk in the woods (something he enjoyed because so much of his time is spent inside by necessity) when he found the backyard bustling with activity. This in itself wasn't unusual as Dipper and Mabel tended to be full of energy to either find or make their own fun, but it seemed they were setting up a party.
"Hey, Dipper, Mabel, what's the occasion?" Mike asked as he approached.
"We found out that today's Soos' birthday," Dipper explained, as he straightened out the table cloth.
"So we're going to throw him the best Birthday ever!" Mabel explained, before turning back to Grenda who was hanging a banner. "Just a little higher Grenda! Right there! Perfect!"
"Did Soos… tell you it was his Birthday?" Mike asked with a hint of concern.
"We… may or may not have snooped through his wallet…" Dipper said carefully as he tied balloons to the table.
"It just means he wants a surprise party!" Mabel interjected with a grin. "I can't wait to see his face!"
"I don't know if this is a good idea…" Mike said carefully, making the twins look at him in confusion. "There's probably a reason he didn't tell you guys… He might not want to celebrate his birthday…"
"How could someone not celebrate their birthday?" Mabel gasped, shocked by the very idea. "Who wouldn't want cake and ice cream! And presents! You can't forget about presents!"
"I can think of several reasons why…" Mike said quietly to himself. (Considering both he and his siblings had suffered fatal accidents either on or near their respective birthdays, Mike wasn't the biggest fan of those types of celebrations.) Not wanting to get into all his personal baggage Mike said more clearly, "Look, I won't stop you guys, but I just want you to be prepared in case this doesn't go over like you plan."
Dipper looked a little hesitant, but Mabel wasn't worried. She pulled him back into their preparations and soon they were both swept up in the excitement of preparing a fun surprise for Soos.
Unfortunately, Mike was right to worry that this wouldn't go well and Soos stuttered out an excuse to get away as soon as he saw the party set up. Wendy and Stan came to see what was going on and confirmed that Soos hated his birthday for some unknown personal reason. The twins felt terrible about the whole thing and were determined to find some way to cheer Soos up.
This is how the whole group ended up at the laser tag place. Soos was still a little hesitant, but with some assurances from Dipper and Mabel, they prepared for the next game. The buzzer sounded, the doors opened, and Mike flowed along with the others into the neon smoke-filled arena. The group immediately scattered into a chaotic free for all. Mike was surprised by how much fun he was having and how good he was. Sure, he wasn't the best shot, but he was used to listening and watching for opponents coming at him in low visibility and those skills fit well in this scenario. These players were a lot louder than the animatronics had been (and thankfully a lot less deadly), making it near impossible for them to sneak up on Mike.
The lack of actual threat though did make Mike drop his guard enough that he did get ambushed when he went around a tight corner. A barraged of laser shots rained at him, most hitting the sensor, but one unlucky shot hit him in the eyes. Mike was temporally blinded by the shot, making him stumble back a bit as he tried to recover.
"Haha! Laser Robbie!" Mike heard laughed by the one who shot him as Mike blinked the spots from his vision. Robbie was gone by the time Mike could see again, but Wendy was on her way over.
"You okay dude?" Wendy asked once she was close. "I saw you stumble."
"I'm fine," Mike assured, readjusting his grip on his gun. "My eyes are just really sensitive to light because of my… condition…"
"Robbie shouldn't have been aiming for the eyes and I saw him ambush Soos earlier," Wendy frowned before getting a mischievous grin. "I think we should give him a little payback…"
"Yeah…" Mike agreed, a grin spreading on his own face. "And I know just the way to get back at a wannabe goth…"
Once the details were hashed out, Mike headed to the correct spot while Wendy went to go lure Robbie to their trap.
"Come on Robbie!" Wendy taunted as she lead the other teen through the obstacles to the foggiest spot in the arena. "I thought you were good at this game!"
"I'll make you eat laser for that!" Robbie called back, chasing after Wendy. "You'll see that I'm… wait... Where did she go?"
Robbie looked around the thick fog, passing where Wendy had ducked down out of sight. Mike then stepped slowly, but loudly, making Robbie stiffen in fear.
"If this is some kind of j-joke, it's not a very good one, I don't scare that easily…" Robbie began, attempting to sound brave before stopping when he saw Mike's glowing eyes through the fog.
"What's the matter, Robbie?" Mike said ominously, letting the metallic echo in his voice bleed through. Mike suddenly leaned forward, bringing his face right in front of Robbie's. The neon lights and fog gave an even sharper contrast to Mike's exposed face, making an already scary sight even more terrifying.
"I thought you were a fan of the undead?" Mike grinned, the black lights making his teeth glow through the holes in his cheeks.
Robbie paled, let out a high-pitched girly scream, and ran out of the laser tag arena as fast as he could. Mike and Wendy watched him go before they burst out laughing.
"Oh, man! I will never forget the look on his face!" Wendy gasped between her laughs, wiping tears away. "This was a great prank!"
"Glad you approve," Mike chuckled, getting his hat back in place to put his face once more in shadow. "Normally, I'm trying not to scare people but I'll admit, that was fun!"
"We'll have to pull that again sometime," Wendy said, offering Mike a fist bump that Mike hesitantly returned. "I'll admit, I was skeptical when Dipper and Mabel insisted on befriending you, but you're alright."
"Thanks for the high praise," Mike smirked, before turning to the rest of the arena. "Come on, we still have a game to play!"
"Right behind you!" Wendy assured and they both jumped back into the fray.
The game went well, with the team of Soos, Dipper, and Mabel winning despite their weirdly late start. Soos was a lot happier as they made their way back to the Mystery Shack as Mabel and Dipper explained that they had apparently been delayed by a crazy time-traveling adventure. Mike had been enjoying listening to it until they began talking about the time wish. As they described the power it contained and the things it could grant, Mike's smile became a lot more forced and he excused himself from the group as they all went inside, heading to the woods instead.
Mike barely had the presence of mind to make it out of sight of the Mystery Shack before he whirled around and punched the nearest tree, making a resounding crack in the bark.
"An infinite slice of pizza?!" Mike snarled, barely keeping his voice down as his eyes burned brightly with his fury. "The power to get anything from all of time and space and he used it to get an infinite slice of pizza?"
There were so many things Mike could have done with that wish that were so much better than just a forever pizza. He could have made it so his siblings had never been killed. He could have saved all of his father's victims. He could have made it that William never became a killer in the first place! He had to get his hands on one! But how? He couldn't exactly get to the far future on his own and he had no idea when a time officer would show up again… was there any way to track them? Dipper and Mabel had gotten tangled up with them twice by now on accident, maybe if he just stuck around them long enough he'd run into them…
"Dude I'm so sorry!" Soos' voice interrupted Mike's spiraling thoughts. Mike turned and watched as Soos came jogging up to him.
"I didn't even think how you could have used the wish to break you're curse or whatever," Soos apologized. "I'm such a dummy sometimes… I was just so caught up in all the stuff with my birthday and everything Dipper and Mabel had done for me and…"
"It's fine Soos," Mike sighed, his anger and desperation draining out of him. "I get it… a lot was happening all at once for you… I don't blame you for using the wish how you did…"
"I'm still sorry dude," Soos said sheepishly. "Maybe I can find some way to get you one? I wonder how hard that would be…"
"You don't need to Soos," Mike said, giving him a small watery smile. "From the sounds of it, those things are nearly impossible to get and dangerous to try. I don't want you risking your life to fix my problems."
"But you're family dude and that's what family does!" Soos insisted, saying it so easily and oblivious to how Mike jolted at the declaration. "There has to be some way to help you like Dipper and Mabel helped me…"
"Soos…" Mike said thickly, trying to swallow back tears. "Soos the fact that you're even offering to face down a gladiatorial arena just for me is a lot more than anyone has done for me in a long time. Besides, if there's one thing I've learned from my life is that hunting down something powerful usually comes at too high a cost and I've already paid too much already…"
And wasn't that how his father justified his horrifying acts? Say that he was on the verge of perfecting something that could put their whole family back together? (Mike had dismissed those ramblings in Fazbear Frights as just a way for his Father to try and manipulate him, but became more uncertain as he dived deeper into studying his father's work. Either way, his family wasn't worth the price of so many others.) His father had lost everything in the pursuit of some grand power and Mike refused to be like him. He was not going to abandon his mission in pursuit of a magical solution that he'd probably never obtain, letting more innocents get killed because of his neglect. No… Mike couldn't waste his time chasing a time wish in hopes of fixing mistakes long past, not when there were still dangers in the here and now.
"Dude you're right…" Soos agreed, eyes widening in realization. "Every anime teaches that messing with time and wishes were dangerous! What if I created a paradox! Wait… they said the wish would be paradox free…"
"I'm sure you're fine Soos," Mike snorted, patting Soos' shoulder assuredly. "I'm positive nothing's bad going to happen… except maybe you getting sick of having pizza since you can now eat it forever…"
"That's never happening, dude…" Soos said with such a serious face that Mike couldn't help but laugh.
"I believe you," Mike grinned, surprised by how much better he felt. "Come on, it's your birthday we're supposed to be celebrating and you shouldn't be out here. Let's go join the others."
"Yeah!" Soos agreed, back to his cheerful self. "Maybe we can make dinosaur cookies! Those always cheer me up and I'm sure they can cheer you up too!"
"You've already cheered me up," Mike said as they walked back to the Shack. "But I won't say no to dinosaur cookies."
"You won't regret it, dude!" Soos concluded.
Together they went inside and joined the others. Sure, their lives still weren't perfect, but for this moment they could forget their problems and just enjoy being in the company of people that care about them.
