Author's Note: Wow, I don't know where September is going, but it's going by fast. I hope everyone had a great summer. I'm ready to welcome in fall! We've got a couple more months in 2022 so let's make it count. I'm back with another chapter and this one might throw everyone for a loop :) But it's one that we've all been waiting for. The closer we get to Las Vegas, the more things will be ramping up with a lot of twists and turns. I hope you're ready for it! Enjoy this chapter.
Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha. Read at your own discretion- drugs; sexual and child abuse.
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R2R
susu-anon: Thanks for your five reviews, lol. Love it. I think I saw Legally Blonde all the way through once long ago so I don't remember that scene in the salon. But I definitely wanted a bonding, relatable moment for all four of them. I also wanted Kagome's two worlds to start converging. She's been hiding one side of her from those she's wanting to love and incorporate into her life. She's wanting things to change and perhaps to stop hiding so much, but also for her friends to know one another so that she can start hanging out with all of her friends more often. Also, there was a reason why I included them in, now. The reason will come up in this chapter. I'm glad you enjoyed their "girl time" though. Yes, we'll talk about mating and stuff later. I thought would be sooner (lol) but it keeps getting pushed back as things pop up. LoL I like your review about the oral sex and a romance chapter between our two lovers (yes to both; and I will have more foreplay. That comes with its limits due to her past, but that will be addressed later). And as for your last review - yes, I'm already seeing some discomfort when going to Las Vegas in the sense of fans, boundaries, and like you said, getting a culture shock. It'll be good for them, and a huge change for Kagome, but a lot of growth if she can get through it. Anyway... I'm glad you enjoyed the last chapter and the sexual chemistry between the two. I hope you enjoy this one and don't get too shocked.
hive-chan: Haha! Thanks for your review. Yes, their possessiveness of each other can be considered either endearing or overbearing, depending how secure/insecure they are. I also love how comfortable Kags is in her skin, in her beauty, and in her control of men. I think she has a lot of power in her femininity if she knew how to use it and not let it use her. Thanks for your review. Enjoy this next one!
inusitter: Yes, sorry took me so long. I hope you enjoyed the last chapter. Enjoy this one!
Rosie B: Haha! YES! I had a vision of a Kanna-like look for Ayumi because I love Kanna's appearance, even down to her demeanor at times. I'm glad you liked the club sex scene. I've been imagining it for a while and when I finally got to write it... I had fun. Who's to say there won't be another club sex? lol The two match each other in intimacy, lust and jealousy for one another. As for Onigumo's strange attitude... yes! I'm glad you caught it. Something will come up :) Enjoy this chapter!
MinxieXCX: Thanks for your review. I'm glad you liked the sex scene. I was imagining it for a while now and had fun finally writing it. As for Kags giving Inu more oral... that'll come up later. There's a reason why it's not happening a lot, aside from the obvious (that Inu doesn't really need it and is too eager to be in her). And like you said, yes there are a lot of things that are coming up, two so soon, and one in the near future (which I touch on in this chapter). Kikyo being a friend will come up in this chapter, but yes, she has a good heart and is a good friend to Inu/Mir/San. Well... so much to look forward to. Enjoy this chapter!
anime-geek: Thanks for your review. So Kag's job will come up, if her occupation ever did get out, the fact that people judge what they don't understand, and your view on how Kik's reputation and Naraku's judgment is a very good point that I bring up in this chapter. It won't be too much of a problem with all the contracts and such Oni has done on his part to protect Kags. But on Kik's side with fan loyalty and celebrity image... who knows? And who's to say Oni won't protect Kags this time since he acted weird in the last chapter ;) I'm glad you enjoyed the salon scene and having all the girls together. That was intentional, pointing out their visual similarities and bringing it up now. There will be more twists as Kag's two lives are starting to mix together. Oh, as for Inu's birthday and a quickie... hmm I haven't thought about it. We'll have to see how things play out from now until then :) Enjoy this chapter.
vanessa: Thanks for your review. You have a point about the Fujimotos possibly finding out about Oni and maybe even putting him in his place. Who's gonna have more power? But yes. Keep that thought in mind, that's all I'll say. Things will be thrown for a loop now, and in the coming chapters. Hope you enjoy this next one.
xsophiex: LoL thanks for your review. And you seem to know me so well lol. Yes, I am going to be giving a lot of twists and turns, and it starts with this chapter. But it'll be coming more consistently with so much happening, even after Las Vegas, and so many people/things wanting to separate our main couple. I'm not even sure what's going to happen because what happens in this chapter came out of nowhere for me. So that was interesting to see how the characters were playing out as I wrote it. As for the bartender lady, she just knows the gang because Inuyasha gave the club their information and their favorite drinks. So the employees know who the gang are, looks like (which is why they can walk to the front of the line and get in for free), and the gang gets served first, whatever they want without paying, at the bar. It's one of the benefits of knowing the owner of RUSH lol. But yeah, that was all there was to that bartender. As for the two weird guys, they just wanted some booty, and they weren't going to get it. I'm glad you like Inu/Kag's relationship. I feel like Kags just wants to be loved, but she doesn't really know that's what she wants or how she wants to be loved. She knows what she doesn't want because that's all she's ever received. But that's different to knowing what she wants. Anyways, I'm glad you enjoyed the chapter. Enjoy this next one!
amyreads: Thanks for the review! I'm glad you're enjoying the story. Here's the next update. Enjoy!
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"Let's take lunch. Naraku will be coming soon."
Everyone breathed out a heavy sigh, some collapsing to the ground and sprawling out on their backs in relief. Their muscles were sore. Their bodies were sore. They were sweating like crazy. It had been one hell of a weekend for the group. After Kikyo's album release party, Friday to Sunday was the beginning of hell. They were on a time crunch now as they were leaving in two weeks. They had learned all six of the new songs but needed to get them solid and on point with one another, on top of learning the transitions and fillers. Every day they were to show up to practice at the academy from sun-up to sun-down. Thankfully, Inuyasha had finished making all six songs by last Thursday so that over the weekend all they needed to do was solidify all six dances. Easier said than done.
Inuyasha had recorded himself doing the final routine for each song so that he wouldn't forget it when teaching it to them, since everything was done so fast and so close together. Once everyone got the dance down for the first time, he recorded all of them doing it once through. That way, when they were not practicing at the academy, they could be practicing on their free time, learning the moves and learning from their mistakes. Everyone needed to be on their game for the next two weeks, memorizing every move, every detail, and synchronizing together if they were to pull off this concert. Inuyasha and Kikyo had full faith in them, which helped the group to be motivated and encouraged when the task seemed so daunting.
Since everyone had learned all six routines, Inuyasha was focused on their timing and their formations. He didn't have to dance with them anymore since they knew it, but instead he was walking around and watching their every move. He made sure their footing and movements were on point and together, which led to a lot of stopping and starting over, much to their irritation. If one person did it wrong, they all did it wrong, and he made them do it over again. He was like a grueling drill sergeant, setting high standards for them and making sure their moves were clean and up to par. But they understood and respected his work ethic, though it was never easy to take in the moment when they were tired and frustrated themselves. Inuyasha could always sense when their moods were turning for the worse and they couldn't function anymore in dance. That's when he stopped and gave everyone a break. It wouldn't make sense for all of them to keep dancing if they weren't going to give their all or if they were too tired or too angry to do it.
"Ugh... I'm so sore," Kagome said with a frown, bringing out her legs in front of her and spreading them apart to stretch. Sango sat in front of her, dripping in sweat, and then rolled onto her back in exhaustion, unable to sit up any longer.
"Me too. It's been four days of this. And we still need to go over the nine old songs." Kagome made a noise like she didn't want to hear Sango say that.
"Well at least we know them," Miroku suggested, trying to comfort them. He stretched on the side between the two of them. "All we have to do is make sure they're clean, practice our formations and the transitions. Then we need to do all the fillers once we know the lineup, and we're done!"
Shippo laughed as everyone could hear everyone's conversations in the quiet, empty room. "Yeah, you tell yourself that, Miroku."
Emi shook her head, sprawled out on her back in a shavasana-like position. "I don't believe you. I know there's going to be more. I feel like my limbs are going to fall off before the end of the week."
Mai rose her hands straight up above her, lying on her back too. "Mine feel like rubber. Does that mean they're going to fall off?"
Shippo snorted. "No. It means we're dragging you out of here like rubber." Everyone laughed, losing their minds with the lack of strength and energy.
"You guys knew it was going to be bad," Inuyasha said, breaking up their laughter. "I knew it was going to be bad the moment Kikyo told us at the party. There's nothing we can do about it but suck it up and get it done," he said, making his way from the mirrors towards Kagome.
Sango groaned loudly, rolling onto her side to sit up quickly, her hair sticking to her face as she irritatingly brushed them away. "We're not all demons like you and Shippo, Inuyasha. We do get tired and exhausted," she said, knowing his stamina after living with him and being his friend for so long. She's seen his energy levels, the length of time he could go without eating anything and being perfectly fine. Demons and humans were vastly different in a lot of ways.
"Hey! I'm tired," Shippo defended, his legs sprawled out in front of him. "We get tired too, you know."
"Not like us," Sango defended right back, her glare showing her irritation.
Kagome groaned, not liking the sound of arguments right now. "Okay, okay. We're all tired. It's been a long weekend. We did know that this was coming so we just need to do the work and take care of our bodies. If any of us gets injured, we're screwed."
"Who's injured?" Naraku asked as he came into the room holding a briefcase. Kikyo followed right behind him and they noticed one of her bodyguards close the door, presumably waiting right outside the door.
"No one's injured," Inuyasha said, not even turning to look at the two as he made his way to Kagome's side. He sat down next to her, pushing some of her hair off of her sweaty face. Kagome smiled at him lovingly, moving towards him to offer him her lips. He smiled and obliged her, kissing her sweetly.
"We can't have anyone getting injured," Naraku pointed out as he and Kikyo walked towards the center of everyone. He looked at all of them sprawled out everywhere. "We have less than two weeks before we leave and less than three weeks before the concert."
"Yeah, we know," Inuyasha said, a bit irritated at Naraku for bringing up the obvious. "We're getting it done. Stop micromanaging." The two of them glared at one another for a few seconds before Kikyo stepped forward, placing her hand on Naraku's arm.
"I'm proud of everyone for giving your all. And I'm thankful. Super thankful to all of you," she said, looking around at their exhausted faces. "I have the best dance team in the world."
"You can say that again," Itsuki said, sitting with his knees up and his arms wrapped around them.
"You wanted to go over the itinerary," Inuyasha started, still looking at Naraku since the guy never broke eye contact with him. If he wanted a stare down, he would get one. Naraku's eyes then went to Kagome, roaming just a little too long for his liking, and then finally he turned to look at everyone while lifting his briefcase up for emphasis.
"Yes. I want to go over the itinerary with everyone. It's a lot so let's gather around in a circle. Are you planning on practicing more after this?" he asked Inuyasha.
Inuyasha shook his head and those who saw shouted in joy. "After this we're done for the day. I figured this would take an hour or so. By then we're all going to be too tired to go back into it."
Kikyo nodded. "That's good. We have lunch being delivered. It should be here any minute so we can talk logistics and you guys can eat."
Everyone was in higher spirits now that they heard all these good news. No more practice for today. Food being delivered. Check and check. A great end to their tiring weekend and Monday. Naraku ushered them with his arms to get closer so they all found renewed strength to get up and move closer, whether that was by scooting their butt closer or crawling over. They all formed a circle and as Kikyo and Naraku sat, there was a knock at the door and the bodyguard opened it, walking in with bags in both hands. As lunch was delivered and passed around, they thanked Kikyo and Naraku, grabbing a bento and digging in.
"Itadakimasu!"
Naraku passed out the itinerary to one side while they started eating. Once everyone had their copy, he began to go over everything like usual.
"The first thing we'll talk about are the flights," he said, sticking to the first page. "Since we last talked, we were able to book everyone on the same flights going to the States and back. We're all leaving next Saturday night around midnight, after Inuyasha's birthday party on Friday, and we should get into Las Vegas around seven in the morning. The flight information and actual times are there," he said, pointing at the paper. "We are sixteen hours ahead of them so just remember that we're going back in time when we fly there."
"So... we're re-living the same day in a different country," Miroku said with deep thought. "That's cool." Sango nodded her agreement as she looked at the detailed flight information to see that it was the same day but just earlier in the same day. Everyone was sitting together in consecutive rows in business class so that they had room to sleep comfortably on the long flight.
Naraku continued, scanning the front page to make sure he didn't miss anything. "Any questions?" No one spoke up so he flipped the page over and heard everyone follow along. "The next page is the itinerary. I have the whole week and into the concert weekend laid out, but remember that things are always open to change. When we land, our rooms are supposed to be ready for us so we'll checkin and then head down to the Colosseum. We'll spend the day in the venue with the managers and the crew to familiarize ourselves with the area. You'll get your passes and identification cards then so that you can go wherever, whenever you want to go to the venue and practice. I have 'practice' in every day up until Friday's first performance since you guys will be practicing as much as possible," he said, turning to look at Inuyasha for confirmation. They had talked about the schedule earlier while Naraku was putting it together, getting from Inuyasha what his plans were so that he could schedule that in, along with Kikyo obviously needing to be there for practice while needing to be at whatever interviews that Naraku would schedule her for. He and Inuyasha always needed to work together, as much as they didn't get along.
"On the next two pages you'll see some of the amenities and shops in Caesar's Palace. It's a huge property so not everything is listed. In the hotel there's a casino with nightclubs, bars and restaurants. There's also a connecting building called the Forums where more shops and restaurants are located."
Everyone was flipping through, looking at all the names of some of the things in the hotel. They were all smiling and talking amongst themselves, thinking of all the fun they would have. Their excitement was building now that they saw what they could be looking forward to when they weren't working.
"I'm keeping our working hours the same when we get there," Inuyasha announced, noticing everyone turn their attention to him now. "We'll work from eight to five every day. Like in Osaka, I want us to practice on stage and get the feel of everything. Since it's indoors, we won't have pyrotechnics like the butterfly canon in Osaka. But we're thinking of doing something for the finale with butterflies coming down from the ceiling," he said, looking at Kikyo. She nodded her agreement.
"Yeah, I wanted to have gold butterflies fall from the ceiling, onto the VIP section during the final song. They're still trying to figure it out. We found butterfly confetti and will buy enough for three nights once we get confirmation from them."
"Small confetti?" Sango asked, thinking about the effect it would have being so small in a huge venue.
"No. They're about the size of my hand. It's pretty cool," Kikyo said with a huge smile. "They have, like, this plastic thing as the body with wires and rubber bands that hold the wings to the body. It's aerodynamic so when it falls, it'll glide and do circles and what-not. I saw a video for it and I think it'll look really nice falling from the ceiling." Her excitement was contagious and everyone agreed, visualizing the effect during the finale.
"What time does the concert end?" Miroku asked, flipping back to the itinerary pages to see the schedule with the times.
"Every night it's an eight to ten performance," Kikyo said.
"We leave Monday at four in the afternoon. We have a late checkout so you can sleep in or do last minute shopping before the cars take us to the airport," Naraku said. "Here's some of the photos of the venue." He let the photos drop out of the manila folder and passed half around on each side of him. "We also have the dimensions of the stage but, after talking with Inuyasha, you guys won't be needing it."
Inuyasha nodded his head as he took some of the photos, taking his time with looking at them again. He had already seen them during his meeting with Kikyo and her team while planning all the logistics. "Yeah. So usually, you guys know that we practice with the true dimensions of the stage in the warehouse. But this time we're doing it different. Because we're crunch on time and I need to see everyone in order to make changes to everything, we'll be practicing in the academy until next Friday. Kikyo will be with us and her bodyguard will guard the door so no one bothers us. The mirrors are helpful for all of us even if the space is smaller than the actual stage. Just keep that in mind. Don't get too comfortable in how close you are to one another because it will change when we practice at the Colosseum."
Everyone nodded their understanding, looking at the photos being passed around. Kagome looked at some of them and then passed them along, getting more excited by the day. The venue was huge and some of the photos were of past celebrities who performed there like Celine Dion and Shania Twain. The city was in and of itself a performer's paradise since a lot of people from around the world go to Las Vegas for more reasons than just to gamble. And she loved that this performance would be Kikyo's biggest one so far. There was a lot on the line, and that's how Kagome understood why Inuyasha was so hard on them during practice. She loved it when he got into his work mode. He became so sexy when he knew what he wanted and he demanded it. Much like how he was in bed.
Kagome felt butterflies in her stomach, thinking about him so intimately. She reached over and placed her hand on his thigh, making him turn to look at her in wonder. She just smiled at him and flexed her fingers against him. He smiled back and interlaced his fingers over and with hers.
"Tell me about next weekend," Naraku said, looking to his right at Inuyasha, sitting next to Kikyo. "What's happening with your birthday?"
Inuyasha shrugged. "All I know is that everyone's invited," he said, looking around at everyone in the circle. "I'm sure my Mother sent out the invitations already." Everyone nodded their heads, confirming his suspicion. "She obviously won't tell me who's invited or what we're doing. I just need to show up."
Kagome giggled. "If you're not there then there's no party."
Sango nodded her agreement. "Right. And according to the invitation and the text, Izayoi is welcoming us to sleep over again. I think that would be easier for all of us to get a few cars to take us to the airport at the same time. That way, we're all together." The others nodded their heads, liking the idea.
"Was everyone planning to sleepover?" Kikyo asked, looking around to see their head nods and hear their confirmations. They were obviously looking forward to it and had planned to leave straight from the Fujimoto's home to the airport. "Okay. Well, I can't sleep over since I have some last minute things to do with the label on Saturday. So I'll meet you guys at the airport."
"When are the crew leaving?" Miroku asked.
"Next Monday," Naraku said. "We're not taking a lot of them since the venue has a lot of their own crew and it is an indoor stage. We'll take some from each team: the stage, the lights, the sound and all of the costume crew will be there. Next Monday they'll take everything with them and start setting up the backstage area so that when we get there on Saturday, we'll have everything we need to start practice."
Kikyo nodded. "The week of the concert I'll want a couple of days of mock performances to run through the whole show with costume changes like we usually do." They all nodded their understanding as they have done it before. She looked around at all of them. "Any other questions?"
"So you're practicing with us starting this week?" Inuyasha said, reminding her.
"Yes. I'll come in tomorrow to practice with you guys."
"Next week is our last week with the dance classes," Inuyasha said. This morning he and Kagome had to do that before they came to practice. It really was a lot for the both of them, more so for Kagome than for him since he was a hanyou. And he didn't want to put her through any more unnecessary stress or work. "I talked to the manager about our timeline and they were fine with losing out on one week. We told them we could come back for two free classes after the concert, to make up for the two classes we'll cancel, and they were happy with that. I even promised them to bring the gang with us as a special gift on the last day next Wednesday."
Sango laughed as Shippo pumped his fist in the air, unenthusiastically. "Great... thanks for signing us up for that," he said.
Kikyo shrugged. "I'm glad they're okay with the change. I changed our plans after we made the agreement with the dance studio, so I'm glad they're willing to change the last two days for a later date."
"It's fine. It works out," Inuyasha said, thankful that the dance lessons were almost finished. There was a reason why he stuck with being a choreographer for Kikyo, and only keeping their team the same over the years.
Everyone kept eating as they all talked about the little details of the trip. Naraku went over more of the itinerary and each day, seeing if Inuyasha or anyone else had any suggestions of what they should do. But with a practice schedule from eight in the morning to five in the afternoon, it didn't leave them with time to do much fun things. They all understood, first and foremost, that they were there for work so they were leaving after work hours open to how they were feeling that day. They talked about their meals to figure out whether or not they would be getting food delivered to them or they would have to leave the venue for a one hour lunch. They talked about the extra details of the performances, the other little pyrotechnics that Kikyo had requested of the venue. And they asked more questions about the rooms, their roommates, and the flights. Everyone was excited to be leaving next weekend, but also stressing on the time they had left to fine tune everything. Inuyasha updated Kikyo on where they were at in terms of the group having learned all six of the new routines and all the extra efforts they put in outside of practice to watch the recordings even on their personal time. He also talked about Kikyo's involvement in the six new routines and some of the ideas he had made on video for her to watch on her own time so that she's ready to practice them tomorrow.
After lunch, everyone left the academy, calling it a day as they headed home to rest.
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"What did you find?"
Sesshomaru looked out at the city lights outside of his office. The sun was getting closer to the horizon and the city was starting to light up, preparing for the night. Tokyo was beautiful at night with all of its lights, or so his mate always reminded him. Rin had a way of seeing the world differently from he did. He had been in it so long that nothing moved him anymore. The only thing that really brought him pleasure or made him see the world in a different light was his mate. She was the reason why he got up every morning. She was the reason why he saw the world in colors at times. She was the reason why he continued to run his family's business, sometimes with an iron fist. His father was the head of their family, but he was his father's right hand. And he took his position seriously, protecting their pack and making sure they had a future that was secured and comfortable. His family was his purpose. Before Rin, he only lived for the rush of the kill, the power and domination that came from wars and bloodshed. After Rin, he lived for her, his life was hers and he made sure that she was always safe and happy.
"We looked into her parents and found a possible match," one of his men said, snapping his attention back to the task at hand. Sesshomaru kept his back facing the two men sitting across his desk, listening with interest while searching for something out in the city that was unattainable to him. "After you told us what your brother knew about her parents, we started there. You were right in thinking that all of her records are lies. One of our experts looked into the digital records on her birth certificate and all of her files. He says that they only mimic the watermarks that the records are supposed to have. Whoever made the files were good at their job, but not good enough."
"So they're fakes. Why do you say that?" Sesshomaru asked.
"The orphanage that was listed in her records knew nothing of a Kagome Saito. We made a personal visit there and found no deceit in any of the managers or workers. We searched through their database for children that would've been her age at the orphanage, but we found no one resembling her."
"But what was promising was that we found her parents," the other man said, both of them wearing suits.
"Alive?" he asked, remembering what Inuyasha told him about Kagome being raped by her own father. If the man was alive, he surely wasn't going to be alive for very long.
"We found a death certificate of a man named Takeo Higurashi. He was married to a woman name Hanako, who is presumed to still be alive, but there has been no record of her since the two lost their home. They lived in Matsuyama city on the island of Shikoku and had one daughter at a hospital we visited when we first looked for Kagome's birth records. The daughter was born healthy and the mother was released a few days later. The records of Takeo we found were that of his home that he lost and then his body being found over a decade later in an underground drug camp. When the police did their sweep, they found his body decayed but his dental records were able to identify him."
"And the mother?"
"She is believed to still be living on Shikoku. We had found no record of Hanako Higurashi after they lost their home. It's like the two simply vanished."
"And their daughter with them," Sesshomaru said, feeling angry at the parents. He had children of his own and he couldn't imagine ever doing that to his children, to not provide a roof over their heads to safely sleep at night. "So they were homeless?"
"We believe so. There are no records of the parents after they lost their home. And none of Kagome. The only record of Kagome was her birth, which was altered, and the two records we found at two separate clinics, which we assume is the same 'Kagome'."
Sesshomaru thought it over. If her parents had been homeless, for who knows how long, then it was understandable that there would be no living records of the three of them. It would be like they had died, society writing them out of the history books.
"My brother said that her parents were drug addicts. That they lived on the streets and that her parents didn't care if she was alive or not. Apparently all they cared about were themselves and their habit."
"It would explain why there's no school records for Kagome either."
Sesshomaru nodded his agreement. He thought about how she had gotten by in life. Yes, he had seen it before, back in the feudal era when the rich and the poor were strikingly set apart. The poor did nothing but work for a living while the rich lived comfortably which meant they had time for education. To think that Kagome had no form of education, no stable home. It made him wonder if she had to fend for herself while her parents were strung up on drugs, too gone to take care of the child they created.
"Did you find anything more on Kagome's birth?" he asked the two, still staring out at the city.
"Using the parents' records, we went back to the hospital where we found one of the records of a 'Kagome'. We spoke with the youkai nurses and doctors, but also with the older human staff who would've been around twenty-seven years ago. They finally broke down once we threatened them."
Sesshomaru smirked, knowing that the Fujimoto name is well-known in Japan. Not only do the youkai know it and revere it, but so do the humans, only in a different light. The youkai know the name because of their true power and reign for centuries. The human world only knows of their financial and social stature in their current generation. Lots of people feared the Fujimoto family because of their royal blood and because of their influence, even with the emperor.
"One of the midwives confessed that she was the Higurashis' midwife, but that she feared her life for telling us. Apparently, the hospital was forced to keep this family's records and existence a secret. They were even commanded to burn all records of the Higurashis' visits, and anything they had on file of the father, mother and child was to be burned and deleted from any database in the hospital."
"Commanded by whom?" Sesshomaru asked.
"She does not know who exactly ordered the hospital to do it. But the order she received came directly from the chief medical officer himself. He made a personal visit to her since she was the midwife, and he apparently made personal visits to every staff member who was on the Higurashi case."
"What of this chief medical officer?"
"He retired ten years ago and died a few years after."
Sesshomaru couldn't see how any of this was helpful information to him. "What else did this midwife say?"
"The midwife said that she distinctly remembered the Higurashi child because of her striking blue eyes. When we showed her a picture of Kagome, she confirmed that was the child because of her eyes and because she looked a lot like her father."
He heard something sliding along his desk and he turned around to finally look at them, glancing down at the manila folder that was slid across the desk.
"We have the records of Takeo and Hanako Higurashi. But nothing exists of Kagome. The only confirmation of her birth was from this midwife."
Sesshomaru walked back to his desk and flipped open the folder, revealing Kagome's photo ID on top. Underneath was a photo of Takeo Higurashi paper-clipped to a stack of records that he presumed was all the files his men could find of Takeo. He grabbed the small stack and moved it aside to reveal the stack beneath with Hanako Higurashi's photo on top. With the two parents' photos, he now put Kagome's photo in the center of the two and could see the resemblance in all three of them. These were the parents she had to have never known, the people they were before the drugs and addiction took over. This man and woman looked normal with no signs of sickness or addiction in their photo IDs. One thing Sesshomaru agreed on was that the midwife was right: Kagome looked a lot like her father. It made him feel a strange way knowing that she looked like the person who raped her. How did Kagome feel? Did she love her father, the parent that she looked a lot like? Did she loved him during or after the rapes? The thought sickened him, and the feeling in his stomach worsened.
There was a loud buzz from his phone on his desk and then a woman's voice came on. "Lord Sesshomaru. Your next appointment is here."
"Show him in."
Sesshomaru closed the folder, hiding the file away in his desk drawer. "Is that all you found?"
"Yes." The two men stood, fixing their suits that were immaculately pressed, fitting them perfectly. He appreciated their attention to detail.
"Go back to that hospital and find out who it was that ordered them to destroy the Higurashi files. If my suspicions are correct, whoever ordered it had a lot of power to make an entire hospital obey and keep this secret for years. I believe it could be Kagome's ex. We could be getting closer to him."
"And our limitations?"
"None. Everything is at your disposal. If you encounter any trouble, let me know and you will have what you need. If I need to go down there myself, I will." That would not bode well for the hospital, or for the person who ordered this. Whoever it was, Sesshomaru was sure that he would find that person sooner or later. Whenever he got on target, he never lost a prey. He would find this person and hopefully it would be the one who is still haunting Kagome.
"Yes, sir."
The two turned and headed for the door and he went back to stand near the windows, overlooking the city. He heard the door open and his men walked out just as his secretary announced his next guest and closed the door behind her.
"I thought your brother would be joining us."
Sesshomaru didn't turn around but tracked the man's movements in his office based off his keen hearing alone. "No. Turns out tonight my brother had other business to attend to. You will deal with me tonight."
"I was hoping to see your brother too."
"You have no reason to. Your business has only been with myself and my sons thus far."
"Because your brother has something I want."
Sesshomaru turned and stared at the man sitting across his desk. Sai Okano was a powerful man, a big man who knew his power and his worth. Not just financially, but in all aspects, Sai knew what he was capable of and what he would demand from others. That was a true leader, a true businessman. He had grit and he had the looks to complete the package. From the few business calls he's been on with Sai, he knew by those meetings alone that Sai was very intelligent, cunning and risky, all of which Sesshomaru respected about the man. Hence the reason why he decided to do business with the man. But as he stared at Sai, took in the man's demeanor and his hard, black eyes, Sesshomaru knew that Sai was talking more than business tonight.
"What is it that you want from my brother?" he asked, walking back to his seat with curiosity.
"That is something I need to discuss with your brother," Sai said, watching as Sesshomaru took his seat. "When we made this meeting a month ago, your brother was supposed to attend."
Sesshomaru shrugged, clearly unaffected by Sai's accusation at the change. "That was a month ago. Things change. My brother has his reasons and he can share that with you if he wants. I, however, did not know that you knew my brother so well that you are so emotional about him not being here."
"I met him at your parent's charity event." Sai wasn't going to say anything else or feed into Sesshomaru's taunting. What was between him and Inuyasha would stay that way. His issue wasn't with Sesshomaru but with Inuyasha. And he had planned to talk to the boy tonight about Kagome and what his intentions are with her. He honestly didn't really know what the conversation was going to be like because when it came to Kagome, she just turned his life upside down and inside out. But that's what he loved about her. All he knew was that he was going to confront Inuyasha about his feelings towards Kagome, and then probably confess his own feelings towards Kagome so that the boy knew that he was a potential suitor, and then see where the conversation went from there.
"And you seem to have an issue with my brother."
Sai shook his head, relaxing back into the chair and turning on that work mode now that his personal problem would have to wait. "No issue. Just wanted to talk. But since he's not here, I'll leave that for another day," he said, putting on his game face as he propped an ankle over his knee. "Now... what were the quotes you found for the international sales?"
Sesshomaru waited a beat, deciding for himself whether or not he wanted to continue with the meeting or continue with getting Sai to tell him what his issue was with Inuyasha. Then again, he wouldn't fight his brother's battles. He was still curious as to how Inuyasha made this enemy and why the two seem to be needing to talk. He decided that he would ask Inuyasha what his relationship with Sai was later. If it was an issue, then this business merger on this project between their companies would not work. And he didn't have an issue with dropping out of it. There were plenty other things to do and invest in, even though they already have spent a good amount of money starting this project. Yet, he wasn't going to keep ties with a family that has bad blood with theirs. It was something he was not willing to do again, or not willingly anyway.
-'-'-'-'-'-'-'-'-'-'-
"You sure about this?" Miroku asked. He sat next to his best friend at the island, both of them drinking their sparkling water. The women were outside watching the sun get closer to the horizon.
The sun's departure from the day was only a bittersweet reminder of what was to come. Inuyasha felt such anxiety and nervousness of what was about to happen, of what he was afraid to happen, but what needed to happen. The glow of the setting sun set the living room and kitchen into ablaze, a rich orange shining against all the metal appliances across from him. He squinted his eyes and looked down at the can he toyed with out of nervousness.
"It has to happen."
"I know it has to happen. But on a night like this?" Miroku worried for his friend. Inuyasha seemed too nervous, too unsure. He looked over his shoulder to see the women still outside, talking while leaning on the railing with their backs towards him. "You've only been dating for a couple months now."
"She's been with us for six months."
Miroku nodded his head, trying to remember the timeline. It felt like Kagome had been with them for longer than that, but in actuality, she was only with them for about half a year. She had those first three months of rigorous training for the Hawai'i concert that flew by. Then a month later was the Yanmar concert. It was after that when he remembered the two started to make it official, even though everyone knew that Inuyasha and Kagome were falling for each other. Still, things were rough with them and they broke up too quickly, but then got back together again. So a few months of dating wasn't really a strong foundation. Their relationship had started off rocky and Miroku feared that they both weren't ready for this so soon.
"Inuyasha... I've known you for five years. And I know you well enough to know that you are just as secretive as Kagome is. The thing you two have in common is that you are both doing it out of self-preservation. And that... can be harmful when both people are trying to protect themselves."
"She has her reasons," Inuyasha said, looking at Miroku. He was going to protect Kagome, even if Miroku didn't know the whole story.
"And so do you."
Inuyasha 'tsked' and looked away from his friend. He eyed the can in his hands, toying with it to keep his mind moving.
"All I'm saying is that you need to be careful not to move too fast, for both of your sakes."
"She's my mate, Miroku. You wouldn't understand."
Miroku nodded, turning his stool so that he faced Inuyasha. "You're right. I don't. But I do understand love, and that people do foolish things when they're in love. Not to say it's right or wrong, but it can be foolish because love blinds all reasoning." He turned when he noticed movement and saw the women make their way back to the sliding door, meaning he had only a few seconds to offer his friend advice. "Trust your gut, Inuyasha. I know you love her, and I know she loves you. But sometimes love isn't enough. It takes trust, communication and commitment..." he said, watching as the women opened the sliding door, their voices and laughter filling the tense atmosphere. He lowered his voice and leaned against the counter. "You deserve to be happy, Inuyasha. And so does she."
With that, they ran out of time. Miroku patted Inuyasha's shoulder and got off the stool, meeting Sango the few steps between them.
"Ready?" Sango asked, her eyes going between him and Inuyasha. She knew Miroku wanted to have a talk with him and she wanted to have a talk with Kagome to see where her head and heart was at. She, of course, knew what tonight was. And the fact that Kagome was still sleeping over only meant that this would be the first night that she would see Inuyasha's secret. It did seem so soon, she echoed Miroku's objection, but if this was what Inuyasha wanted then the both of them would support him.
Miroku nodded, looking at Kagome. "You two going to cook or call for takeout?" He watched as Kagome went to Inuyasha's side and placed her hand on his arm.
Inuyasha looked up at her with a smile and she smiled back, arching an eyebrow. "We'll see what this guy's up for. I don't think the delivery will be able to carry all of his order."
Inuyasha caught her around the waist and turned so that she went right into him. "I take pride in my ability to eat."
Kagome laughed against his chest, warming him from within. Her scent calmed his nerves and holding her in his arms dispelled any doubts and tension he felt a few seconds ago. She was such a gift to him.
"Maybe you should enter an eating contest," Miroku said, urging Sango forward. The two of them walked around the island and waved at the two. "See you guys in the morning."
"Have fun on your date! And tell your parents we said 'hi'," Kagome said, smiling as the two waved and left.
She turned to look down at Inuyasha, wrapping her arms around his neck. "So... what did you have in mind?"
Inuyasha smiled, her beautiful blue eyes taking on a heat that he knew so well. She was all fire this woman of his. Especially when he got her beneath him. "Are you hungry?" His eyes went to her lips as she licked them, tempting him.
"Not really. At least, not for food."
He chuckled. "Maybe we can keep that for afterwards."
Kagome perked up, wondering what he was planning. "After what?"
Inuyasha looked out the window to see the sun nearly touch the horizon, shining the last of its light into the living room. He took a deep breath, taking comfort in her scent, in the fact that he loved her and trusted that she loved him. More than Kiyomi did.
"I want to talk."
Kagome frowned. She loosened her grip on his neck and he turned to look back at her. "About?"
"Come."
Inuyasha urged her back so that he could stand, the both of them releasing each other, and he grabbed her hand to lead her back to his room. With every step he took, he felt a sense of determination setting in. This would be it. He would show her his last secret and tell her whatever she wanted to know about him, about Kiyomi, about his infertility and about mating with an inuyoukai. He wanted no secrets between them. And he knew that she had secrets that she hadn't told him yet. He was hoping that tonight, they would be revealed. A give and take, like they've always done.
Kagome let him lead her back to the room, the whole time curious and a bit nervous as to what he wanted to talk about. He sounded and looked so serious, the complete opposite of what she was expecting once Sango and Miroku left. She had been here since Monday and tonight would be the last night she could sleep over before she had to go back home for work tomorrow night. Every night they had made love, even sometimes in the morning too. He couldn't keep his hands off her the same way she couldn't keep her hands off him. But that's what she loved about him. He was too damn sexy not to want to touch him and have her way with him. But tonight, she could feel that that wasn't on his mind. Right now, he seemed determined to talk and tell her something. Whatever it was, she could only wonder with every step she took.
They stepped into his room and he closed the door behind them, locking it. Kagome was surprised since he never locked his bedroom door. He pulled her with him and she followed, going to the sliding door to walk out onto his balcony. It was a little smaller than the living room balcony but it easily fit two cushioned chairs with a coffee table between them. He walked them to the railing and released her, placing his hands on the railing to turn and look at her.
"Kagome... I want to show you something." The curiosity and innocence in her eyes made him smile, melting away his doubts and insecurities. 'She loves me. She will accept me. She will.' He said it to himself like a mantra, needing it to be true. If she didn't... he wouldn't know how to survive without her now that he found her.
"What? Why are you acting so serious?"
Inuyasha sighed. "Because I need you to know this part of me. And it's the last secret I have." He looked at her blue eyes, so innocent and pure. "If you know this about me, then you know everything there is. I can tell you my past if you want to know it. I can tell you all the things I've done and the lives I've taken but... this is who I am. I've lived my whole life afraid of showing anyone this weakness of mine because they could use it against me to kill me. My mother told me to never let anyone see this part of me because I could die if someone who hated hanyous knew this about me. Of course, that was before I could defend myself."
Kagome placed a hand on his arm, starting to worry. "Inuyasha... what are you talking about? Who's going to kill you?"
He smiled at her, wondering how foolish it might sound to people nowadays. "No one. At least, not in this era. But back in the feudal era, people would kill hanyous easily during their weakest time."
She took in his words, thinking about all that he was trying to tell her, and piecing things together. The sky behind him started to dim, and since they couldn't see the sun from his balcony, she figured it was beginning to set and the sky was losing its light. He looked so handsome with the changing colors of the clouds and the sky behind him.
"Hanyous? Are you talking about when they turn human?"
Inuyasha blinked, shocked that she knew. "You know about that?" Now he was curious and even more dead set on finding out her many secrets. How did she know so much about demons and hanyous? What kind of an upbringing did she have that she knew so much about youkai? And why hasn't she asked anything about his human time?
Kagome nodded, gripping the railing to look over, far down at all the little cars that she could see from forty floors up. "When I used to live in the homeless camps outside of the city, sometimes there were youkai and hanyou children living there. Outcasts. Rejects." She smiled, thinking of the human and youkai children that she used to run around and play with when she was alone and her parents were on their binge. "I used to play with hanyou children and they told me about this 'weakness'. That all hanyous have it. A time when their human blood dominated their youkai blood, and their youkai blood went dormant for a specific amount of time. Everyone was different and no two hanyous of the same species had the same time."
Inuyasha nodded his head, knowing Kagome had been through a lot growing up. She definitely was street smart and knew things that not most humans nowadays know. She had personal experience with the bad and the ugly, and she grew up around youkai. This only made him wonder even more about her past and the secrets that she carried.
"That's true. Every hanyou has a different time when their youkai blood goes dormant. Did they tell you theirs?"
Kagome shook her head. "No. They said they could never tell anyone, not even a close friend. Because anyone could easily turn against them. I thought it strange they said that because of the age we live in. Not many humans believe in youkai anymore, plus youkai blood is highly prized and treasured."
"It is... but even then, we have our enemies. Anyone, even our own kind, may want to harm us. It's hard for us older generation of hanyous to trust after the lifestyle and culture we grew up in centuries ago."
Kagome frowned, looking at him. She wondered what kind of life he had long before she met him. He was turning two hundred and fifty years old next week. Just looking at him, she never would've guessed he was that old. He looked to be in his twenties, so young and vibrant, yet he had been through a lot of changing times and culture.
"Is that what you want to show me?"
He looked out, unable to see the sunset, but feeling it in his entire body. He could feel the change starting, slowly at first, like a tingle in his fingers and toes. The sky was getting dimmer while the clouds were turning a beautiful pink and purple against the sky.
"I want you to see me as a human," he said, looking back at her. "This is my biggest secret."
Inuyasha felt the change come on him and he watched her shocked blue eyes. His fingers and toes felt tingly at first, and then it felt like his body grew a little hotter. He closed his eyes, feeling the change and losing his senses. His head tingled and he felt his ears were no longer on top of his head but on the sides. He knew that his hair also changed when his ears disappeared. He knew Kagome watched everything physical happen to him, but she didn't know what was happening within him. It was like everything became much smaller, narrower, dimmer. The world became a different place when he became human. He felt his strength leave him first, just as the tingles started and his body grew hot. No longer did he have hanyou strength, a strength that was so easy and careless for him. As the tingles went away on his body, they started on his head, and his hearing changed when his hanyou ears disappeared. No longer did he have hanyou hearing, the world was much quieter now that he couldn't hear everything so amplified. And the last to go was his sense of smell. The strongest sense that an inuyoukai has, the thing that told him everything he needed to know. No longer did he have his hanyou smell, the scents around him faded away, even Kagome's which he loved the most.
He opened his eyes, making sure for himself that she was still there. No longer did he have hanyou sight, the ability to see further and more detailed than humans, even seeing in the dark. Kagome's face was shocked, no doubt watching the entire transformation right in front of her like some magical fairytale. He couldn't tell what she was thinking, or smell if she felt any fear or any emotion. He couldn't sense anything as a weak human. All he could do was watch her and wait anxiously.
"Say something," he said, swallowing hard.
Kagome didn't know what to say. She was in awe to have witnessed such a miracle happen in front of her. Inuyasha's hair from the scalp down turned to black, and his eyes still matched his hair, even in his human form. His cute dog ears were gone, making her think he had human ears beneath his hair. It was amazing to witness that, and she didn't know what to say. She was speechless.
"I..." She swallowed, feeling overwhelmed with emotion. She felt so much love and gratitude for this man, this hanyou. She turned to face him and reached up to place her hands on either side of his face, making him face her too. "I love you, Inuyasha. Human or hanyou. I love you. You're beautiful the way you are. And I'm thankful that you showed me this part of you."
Inuyasha took a deep breath and let it out, letting go of all his doubts and worries that Kagome would leave him. He felt such a relief. He was filled with so much love for her, that she had such a big, loving heart. He didn't deserve her. But she loved him. He reached for her, mimicking her hands, and moved his head down to kiss her, pouring all the love he felt for her into the kiss, feeling her arms wrap around his neck. He deepened the kiss, wrapping his arms around her waist, holding her to him. She was so soft against him. He wanted to treasure this moment with her. He was relieved that she accepted him. But now he wanted her to trust him the same way he trusted her. He needed that from her.
He pulled back and smiled at her. "Sit with me."
Kagome nodded and they went to the chairs. Inuyasha pulled both chairs closer and moved the coffee table out of the way so that the arms of the chairs were against each other. They both sat and Kagome tucked her feet under her, leaning against the arm while holding his right hand with both of hers.
"You still look very sexy in black," she commented, her eyes sparkling at him.
He smirked. "You like the silver or the black better?"
She thought about it for a moment, smiling at him with that mischievous smile of hers. "Does the carpet match the drapes?"
He burst out laughing with her following suit. He loved that they were so open with each other about sex and that she had come a long way with being touched. He still remembers that first day of practice, when she recoiled from his touch and told him that she doesn't like to be touched. He was brisk with his response, telling her to get over it because she was in a dancing group. Had he known about her past and the reasons why she didn't like to be touched, especially by men, he wouldn't have been so harsh and rude with his comment. They both had come a long way in their relationship together and he could only laugh and savor their intimacy now. "I never kiss and tell. You'll just have to find out if you're lucky enough."
"Oooo... we'll see then," she teased, squeezing his hand. "But I like you either way, Inuyasha." She looked him over, tilting her head to the side. "How long does this last?"
"My human time is on the night of the new moon." He looked up at the darkening sky, seeing the first glimmers of stars trying to outshine the last of the sunlight. "From the moment the sun sinks to the moment it rises on the next day."
Kagome thought about that and why she had never seen his human form. She never really noticed the moon cycles, not during their overseas performances, and while she slept over, she only stayed three nights out of the week. And they haven't been dating for long so it didn't really surprise her now that she thought about it as to why she's never seen him like this before.
"Kagome... we need to talk."
The seriousness of his voice again brought her back. She regarded him with seriousness and curiosity, wondering what else he was going to share.
"You know so much about me, but I know so little about you. I wish you would tell me more about yourself and be open to me about your secrets."
She frowned, her heart beating a little faster as she realized that he wanted her to share her secrets too. She averted her gaze from him as uneasiness swept through her. "I've told you more about myself than I have ever told anyone," she said softly, staring at their interlocked fingers.
He nodded, watching her every move. "I know. You've told me that, and for that, I'm grateful that you trust me enough to share those things about you. But... I still feel like there are so many secrets about you that I don't know."
She remained silent, not knowing what to say. Did he bring her here to trap her into answering all his questions? Did he think that he would show her this and she would tell him anything and everything? She felt sad and mad. Sad that she couldn't tell him everything that he deserved to know and mad that he would put her in this situation.
"Tell me I'm wrong," he said.
Kagome bit her lip, fighting within herself. Could she really tell him everything? 'He showed me his biggest secret. Can I tell him mine?' she asked herself, hating herself even more when she knew the answer. She couldn't. She bowed her head, closing her eyes in pain.
"Kagome..." He leaned over and brushed her hair out of her face, bringing her chin up. "Do you remember when we first started dating? Tit for tat? Remember?" He waited until she nodded, and then he released her and sat back in his chair, keeping his eyes on her. "I won't force you to tell me anything. It's your choice. All I ask is that you love me enough to want to tell me."
And there it was. He gave her the choice. She could choose to tell him or not, or maybe lie. But then who benefited from that? She would rather not tell him something than lie. But still... she did love him. Very much. But how much would he love her if she told him everything?
"Wh... what do you want to know?"
He squeezed her hand encouragingly. "Whatever you're willing to give me."
"You have to ask. Give me somewhere to start."
"Okay." The first thing he thought about was the thing that has been plaguing his mind since his brother started looking for her ex-boyfriend. "Is Kagome Saito your real name?"
Her head came up in shock. "How... what?" Her heart was racing. 'I thought Onigumo took care of that? He promised me there would be no records.' She untucked her feet and placed them on the ground, sitting up to tug her hand from his, but he wouldn't let go.
Inuyasha couldn't hear if her heart was beating fast or sense her emotions. Right now, he was on the same playing field as she was and he felt like he was at a disadvantage. But he knew that this would make it easier for her to talk to him without him looking into every change of scent and heart rate. Still, what he could see from her reaction was that she was shocked.
"Listen to me, Kagome. I don't know why you're afraid of telling me the truth, but I want to know everything there is to know about you. Do you think that I won't be able to handle it?"
Kagome chuckled softly, smirking. "You won't," she said softly.
He took a breath, frowning out of disappointment that she thought so little of him. She looked out at the sky and refused to look at him. "Why? Do you think I don't love you enough?"
"No one did," she whispered.
"I'm not your parents!" he said, getting angry because he was hurt that she would think that, especially of him. "And I'm not your damn ex-boyfriend!"
She tugged on her hand, closing her eyes as she hung her head. "Let me go, Inuyasha. I need some space." He waited, watching her to see if she would run. He let her hand go and she quickly bolted up, walking to the railing to lean her elbows against it. He stared at her back, waiting for her to say something, giving her time. He knew enough from Rin to know that people needed time and space to say things, so he would give Kagome that.
The city was getting brighter by the minute as the city lights grew brighter than the darkening sky. Kagome buried her face in her hands, wondering how it came to this. She felt trapped. She needed fresh air, she needed to breathe, she needed to be away from him. The very thing that she needed, she couldn't stand to be around right now. The feeling was so strange, and the emotions in her mind were so strong. She needed him, his love, to prove to her that he did love her enough. That he did love her more than her parents or Koga ever did. But that same love was the very thing she was deathly afraid of. It paralyzed her because she never had that kind of love before so she didn't know how to receive it. It frightened her to no end and all she wanted to do was go home, back to her comfort zone, back to her lonely existence where she knew her way around. This... this was something so foreign to her that it overwhelmed her. And she felt like he was giving her no choice. And that gave her flashbacks to Koga, when he took away her freedom of choice.
'Come on, Kagome... It's Inuyasha.' She took deep breaths, calming her racing thoughts and heart. 'He loves you.' Of course he did. A lot of men told her they loved her and would give her anything and everything she desired. She's heard it many times before. But this time... this time she hoped it was true. She would place her whole heart and life on it, on him.
"Why do you think that's not my name?" She refused to look at him, but kept her forehead in her hands, staring down at the city below.
Inuyasha picked his words carefully, not wanting to lie but also not wanting to give on that he was looking into finding her ex-boyfriend so that he could eliminate the threat to her. "My brother was looking into something and came across your name. It was odd to him so he asked me if that was your real name."
"What is your brother doing looking into me for?" she asked, turning to speak over her shoulder.
Inuyasha sighed, knowing that he couldn't hide it from her, and he honestly didn't want to. "He's not."
"Then why is he asking for my name?"
"So that isn't your name?"
"Don't change the subject," she accused, now turning around to look at him. "Why is Sesshomaru looking into me?"
"He's not." Inuyasha stared at her, gauging her reaction. "I asked him to look into your ex-boyfriend."
Kagome could feel her blood run cold. Her legs nearly gave out so she leaned back against the railing, hanging onto it for dear life. "Why?" She couldn't tell if that was her voice. She was terrified.
Inuyasha stood, seeing the sheer terror and fear in Kagome's face. He couldn't stand being so far away from her and he went to her, watching her wide, fearful eyes follow his every movement, like hunted prey. She was gone from him. He pulled her into his arms, away from the railing, holding her against his chest like a frozen statue.
"Kagome... why don't you want me to know who he is? He hurt you. I have a right to know so that I can protect you from him."
He felt her shake her head softly against him, but she didn't speak.
"I know that he's out there and that he's looking for you. You said it yourself. That's why you never wanted to do any PR with Kikyo and that's why you changed your contract. You wanted to be out of the spotlight so that he wouldn't find you on national television or on social media. You're afraid that if he sees you, that he'll come for you. Am I right?"
It took her a few moments, but she eventually nodded.
"And I'm telling you, that as your mate, it's my right to protect you. I can't protect you from someone that I don't know, not his name, not where he is. I know nothing about this man because you won't tell me, so I can't protect you. I asked my brother to look into finding him, given the little you told me about him, and he started with you because that's the only way we could find him. That's why Sesshomaru questioned your name. He couldn't find anything in your past that could lead me to him."
He stopped, knowing that was a lot for her to take in, so he just held her. She wasn't moving. He could feel her breathing against him, but her hands were at her sides and she was quiet. He rubbed her back, willing her to talk, hoping to comfort her.
Kagome didn't know what to say. 'He's looking into me...' It was only a matter of time before he found out since he already found reason to question her real name. In all honesty, she wished she never had to tell him about her past. She wished she could just forget about who she was and where she came from. Her past always came back to haunt her. It seemed like no matter what she did, she could never truly be free of her past. So she steeled herself, resigning to the fact that she will have to tell him. The last thing she wanted was to lose Inuyasha. He was her everything. He meant more to her than her life. And she hoped that he would still remain with her after all that she had to tell him.
"Why is it so important for you to find him?" she whispered, delaying the inevitable.
He placed his hands on her shoulders to push her back against the railing. His black eyes, so different in color, still held the same love and strength she knew.
"You're important to me, Kagome. You. You're the reason I need to find him."
She felt her heart constrict at the depth of his love for her. She didn't deserve him. She bit her bottom lip, feeling the tears come to her eyes, so she turned around, needing the privacy of not showing him her emotions while also not wanting to look at him as she told him her darkest secrets. No one but Onigumo knew everything about her. He was the only one who knew every dark detail of her and her past. Onigumo accepted her. She hoped Inuyasha would too.
Kagome sighed, leaning her arms onto the railing, staring out at nothingness. "My history with men hasn't been the greatest. It started off with my father raping me..." She felt his hands leave her shoulders and he moved to stand next to her, mimicking her posture. She turned her head to look at him, but he was looking out at the city too, expressionless. She frowned, casting her gaze back out at the city lights, wondering how this night would end.
"When I was eight, my father had a drug supplier that had very deep pockets. They were a rich and powerful youkai family who was well-known on Shikoku Island. Their family had lots of businesses, and one business was in the opioid market, here in Japan and in other countries. They're a powerful... wolf youkai family."
Inuyasha gripped the railing with both hands, squeezing it so tight that she could see his knuckles turn white. She refused to look at him, but she knew that he knew who she was talking about. She had a feeling that all these rich and powerful youkai families somehow knew each other, especially in this day and age when the bloodlines were so few.
"Nakashima..." he growled out. Even in his human form, he sounded more beast than man.
She nodded. "The Nakashima family was my father's supplier for years. And when I was eight, my father and mother took me along with them to get dope." She looked up at the starry sky, turning into a dark grey as the light faded away with each passing minute. The only light they had spilled out from inside the bedroom, nearly reaching her feet. "I remember meeting Koga for the first time. As a child, I thought he was so handsome and kind. He towered over me and he would always crouch down to be at my eye level. He always brought me sweets and told me how beautiful I am, even though I was dressed in rags and hadn't showered in days. He loved my eyes. He asked me once if he could call me Bluebird, and I was thrilled. Here was a man who showered me with affection and attention. I was so happy that he saw me and that I was his 'little Bluebird'..." she said softly, a sad smile bringing back those long-forgotten memories before she knew the real Koga.
"Koga always insisted that I be there when my parents came to him for drugs, so I was. I got to see him a lot, and I liked it because it was the only time I ever got to have sweets, and the only time I got to spend with him while my parents made the deal with his two men. Koga would walk and talk with me, asking me about my likes and dislikes, getting to know me. Of course, as I child, I loved the attention. And I craved the times when I got to go see him..."
Inuyasha shifted then, making her turn her eyes to look at him. He released his hold on the railing and instead rested his arms back down, leaning onto them as he stared down at the city below him. She shifted her eyes back to the sky, wondering what he was thinking of her.
"A couple months after I first met him, he told my father that he wanted to marry me. My parents knew the Nakashimas were wolf demons and Koga explained to them about his culture. He has a mate. Her name is..."
"Ayame," Inuyasha said, cutting her off. She turned to look at him, frowning. She couldn't gauge his mood but by his body posture and tone, she knew he wasn't taking it well.
"Yes. I don't know much of what was said. All my parents told me was that Koga wanted me to be his bride, and in exchange we would be a part of the family. That came with all the benefits. We would have our own home near his, we would be taken cared of and never be homeless or hungry again. Plus... the greatest benefit, which was what my parents really wanted, was the dope. They would have an endless supply of dope."
Inuyasha chucked, half-heartedly. "So your parents sold you for dope."
It was a cold-hearted statement, but true nonetheless. However Inuyasha would've worded it, it was true. And it was hard to hear coming from his mouth.
"Yes," she whispered, needing to finish, to get this all out before she lost the nerve. "My father agreed and I was betrothed to him. When I was ten, Koga had to leave Japan. Apparently one of his opioid suppliers in China was threatened and he needed to go take care of business. I never saw him again until I was seventeen. After he left, my father began raping me for five years. Maybe he lost faith that Koga would come back and keep his promise, so he was punishing me for losing all his dope. I don't know... but after my father died, my mother and I lived on the streets until Koga's men found us two years later. He brought the two of us to his home where we lived in a house on his property for a couple months. And when I turned eighteen... we were legally married."
She shifted, feeling uncomfortable. She gripped the railing and shifted back and forth on her feet. "My birth name is Kagome Higurashi. I became Kagome Nakashima when I turned eighteen."
"I thought you said that he was abusive to you. How... when did you leave?" he asked, trying to piece all the pieces together. She had only told him bits and pieces. Now, she was putting the puzzle together and he was starting to see how horrible her childhood had been. Not only that, but he was already dead set on killing Koga. Koga would never get away with what he did to Kagome.
"After we married, then he moved me into a room in his family home. His parents lived there along with his mate. That night, Koga raped me. On our wedding night," she said with a dark chuckle. "I refused to sleep with him so instead, he took me by force. After that night, I tried to escape. That's when he handcuffed me to the bed so that I wouldn't be able to escape. There was always an attendant who would check on me every hour to give me food or water and uncuff me so that I could use the bathroom. But I was always cuffed to that bed. I was a tool for him, nothing more but to satisfy his lust. And Koga was nothing like the man I idolized as a child."
"Did you love him?"
The question startled her, that he would ask that of her after what he knew she went through. "As a child, sure, you could say that I was infatuated with him. I had a childlike love for this man. But when I grew into a woman, no. I didn't love him the night we married and he raped me. And I still don't love him now." She turned to look at him, hurt. "Do you think I love him?"
Inuyasha shook his head, looking at her. "I just needed to know." When he looked at her, his face reflected the same hurt and pain that she felt for having to tell him all of this. But when he looked away, he took on a serious, almost unreadable expression that made her wonder what he was thinking. His blank look also helped her to keep her emotions at bay so that she could talk without getting upset or lose courage to tell him everything. He needed to know. If not now, then when.
"I remember you told me about the night you tried to leave... and he pushed you over the second-floor railing," he said, barely getting the words out. "He left you bleeding... alone on the floor... all night."
Kagome reached to place her hand on his arm, settling him. He was getting upset and she needed him to remain composed so that she could keep going. "Yes. I was taken to the hospital the next morning and I snuck out a week later and left the island, coming here to Tokyo."
"Are you still married to him?"
Kagome took her hand back as if he burned her. 'The secret I never wanted to tell him...' There it is. She clasped her hands together and didn't know what to say. It was a simple question. The problem was that she didn't want to tell him. But she didn't want to lie. And if he didn't know, then he knew now by the silence that stretched on between them.
"How did you leave the island? How did you get the money to come here?"
She didn't hear any accusation in his tone. But that didn't stop the pounding of her heart as it felt like he interrogated her, seeking the truth. The both of them were just feet apart from each other, but they couldn't look at each other or touch one another as they needed the space to talk, to listen and to process.
"I knew someone who got me a ticket onto the ferry off of Shikoku. And then I pawned my wedding ring in Kure and that gave me enough money to catch the Shinkansen to Tokyo."
"How did you change your name? We do background checks on our employees... and I found no records of your parents' names or your marriage to Koga. Nothing of who you are exists."
She heard the frustration and hurt in his voice. She should have told him. She should have told him sooner, and he was hurt that she didn't. But this wasn't supposed to ever come out. None of this was supposed to exist. Kagome Nakashima, Kagome Higurashi, never existed.
"When I came to Tokyo, I survived off the money I got from the ring for a week or so. I don't know how many days I lived on the streets in the city. One night, I met the man who... saved me." She put her head down, confessing to him how much Onigumo meant to her. Yes, he has changed recently, but deep down, she knew that he was that same man who cared for her and took care of her when she couldn't care for or take care of herself. He meant a lot to her and was so grateful to him for all he did for her.
"A man took me off the streets, fed me and gave me a roof over my head. He also gave me a job and I've been working for him ever since."
"At Starlite?" he asked.
So innocent, and yet so far from the truth. 'What is the truth anymore?' She sighed, weary from lying to him but also weary from having to tell him the truth. She didn't know if it felt better that he knew or that he didn't know. Having to tell him felt terrible, like he would leave her after this was done. And she would be ready for that. If tonight was the last night they would be together like this, then at least the both of them had no more secrets between them. Yes, there would be no more secrets between them after she got all of this out.
Kagome turned and walked back to the chair she once occupied, sitting down and drawing her knees up to wrap her arms around them. She tried to get as small as possible, feeling Inuyasha's eyes on her as he leaned against the railing in front of her, waiting for her to continue. She avoided his eyes, staring down at the ground instead.
"Inuyasha... I don't work at Starlite. I never did."
Inuyasha took a deep breath, trying not to let his emotions get the best of him. He turned around again, leaning his arms on the railing, feeling the heavy weight of dread and betrayal. How many lies had she told him? How many secrets was she keeping? And why from him? He took another deep breath, closing his eyes, seeing Kiyomi's face. Although they were nothing alike, Kagome was hurting him like Kiyomi had.
"Then why the lie?"
"Because in order to apply for the job with Kikyo, I needed an occupation that was... acceptable."
When he didn't respond, she frowned and placed her cheek on the tops of her knees, staring at the sky. "The man who took me off the streets... he offered me a job as a gentlemen's girl. So I work at a gentlemen's club from Thursday through Sunday. He owns the building that I live in and he gave me that apartment until I made enough money to pay for rent. Now, I have enough money where I'll never have to go back to how I used to live before I met him. And it's all thanks to him, for saving me that night."
She remained quiet, waiting to hear anything from him. Something. But he remained just as quiet as she was with his back to her. The sounds of the city below were the only sounds between them. 'Inuyasha...' She felt the distance between them get bigger, deeper than just the physical separation, but a distance that was now emotional. Something had changed between them. Something broke. And it was her fault for causing it. For causing him this pain. She had wanted to protect him from her past, from the way she lived her life. Instead, she was only hurting him.
"Inuyasha... I'm sorry I didn't tell you."
"Are you?" he asked with a hint of anger. "Would you have told me if I hadn't asked?"
She frowned, expecting his anger, but still not liking it. "No," she whispered.
Inuyasha shook his head, placing his forehead on the tops of his hands, bending down on the railing. "So all this time, you haven't been working at a restaurant? You've been lying to me about your job? You've been doing... what? Stripping?" He could barely get the word out. The thought alone of Kagome on stage, stripping for a bunch of disgusting men, for money. And why the hell was she still working there if she made more than enough money now to live comfortably?
"No!" she rose her voice in anger. "That's why I needed a different job for my portfolio. My job isn't really accepted by society. People don't understand my line of work. If I had put that on my portfolio, I'm sure I wouldn't have been a candidate for the position."
Inuyasha lifted his head, remembering things that were now clicking into place. "Last week at the club... at Kikyo's release party..." He chuckled to himself. "Now it all makes sense." She had smelled like so many men, more than he was comfortable with her smelling like. One too many. And their scents weren't so much on her clothes as they were on her hair and her skin. The smell of expensive cologne and a male's sweat. Now that he knew she worked at a club as a gentlemen's girl, now it all made sense.
Kagome frowned, tightening her hold on her legs, protecting herself from his coldness. She remembered that night. He had been so angry that she smelled like other males, but she had quickly thought of excuses to cover up her story. "Inuyasha... a gentlemen's girl is not a stripper. And I work at a high-end gentlemen's club..."
"The late nights into the early morning hours..." he said interrupting her. She stared at his back, wondering where he was going. "I don't know why I didn't see that. You told me that it was just the Starlite restaurant and how some workers needed to stay late. That was a lie."
She felt her heart break with every word he said, piecing together all the lies she had told him. She had been trying to protect herself, her secrets, and in the end, she was now hurting the one person she loved the most. She stared at his back, feeling tears come to her eyes, wishing that none of this had to happen or had ever happened. Wishing they could start over again.
Inuyasha straightened then, gripping the railing with both hands. "At the dance studio... you've danced on a pole before. That was a lie."
"I didn't lie about that. I just didn't tell you the whole truth."
"And those two friends of yours... they work with you at the club."
Kagome nodded. "Yes."
Now it all made sense. He remembered at the release party, when he had smelled those male scents on her, he had also smelled two female scents that he recognized. He just couldn't remember from where. Now he knew. He could see the three of them working in a club. They looked perfect for the job. The three of them were beautiful in their own but together, they were a deadly combination for any man wanting to pay for a woman's service. He could picture Kagome up on stage, beckoning a man, enticing him with her body. The same way she enticed him. The thought sickened him.
"Is that how you know Sai Okano?"
The question gave her pause. That he would remember Sai now. That he still remembered that one interaction she had with Sai months ago at his parents' charity event.
"Yes. He's... one of my clients."
Inuyasha chuckled. "Is that what you call them? Clients?"
Kagome stiffened at his tone. "They are my clients. They pay for my time and my services..."
Inuyasha chuckled again. "Your services..."
She got hurt and angry, placing her feet on the ground. "You don't know what a gentlemen's club is."
"I've been to a few, so yes, I do know what a gentlemen's club is and what the women do there with their men. Or 'clients' as you call them. I've done business in a few gentlemen's club and I guess I've been a 'client' to a few gentlemen's girls."
The idea of Inuyasha in one of the clubs only brought a knot to her stomach because she knew what the women do for their men, the lengths a woman had to go to with the right amount of money paid. He turned around to lean his back against the railing, his black eyes staring at her with indifference. She tried to hide the hurt his words brought her, but he saw it too soon.
"Why are you upset? It sounds like a gentlemen's club is innocent. There's nothing wrong with it... according to you."
She felt her temper rise at his sarcasm and at how cold he was acting towards her. He was egging her on, turning her words around on her. "That's not what I said. You just don't understand..."
"There are women who sell their time and their bodies to men who are willing to pay for them. She will entertain her man and dance on a pole to get his attention. She'll sit with him and pour him drinks, or lie with him and give him whatever he wants from her body. She's at his disposal until his time is up, and then she's on to the next one who's willing to pay. Isn't that a gentlemen's girl?"
His blunt words cut her deeply, deeper than she thought he could. It was true that he had been to a gentlemen's club because he knew exactly what a gentlemen's girl did. But to hear it put bluntly like that... he made her feel like a whore. "Yes..." she whispered, hurt. "But you don't understand. My boss gives me privileges..."
Inuyasha chuckled coldly. "Yeah, I'm sure he does." He growled, frustrated with himself, with her. He felt like the whole night had been ruined. He had wanted no lies between them and had wanted to show her all of his secrets, his last one. But he hadn't expected that she had kept so many secrets from him, secrets that were hidden lies, and with each secret she exposed, his heart broke more and more. It was as if he had been living with a lie, that his whole relationship with her was built off of lies. She was still married to that damn wolf. She was a gentlemen's girl, selling her body to men. And then she came home to him after being with them. The thought sickened him and he even couldn't look at her.
"I can't believe you didn't tell me this. You're still married to Koga. And you sell your body to men and then come home to me. Was I just getting their leftovers?"
Kagome stood abruptly, appalled and resentful that he would think any of that. That he would think this small of her. After all she had shared with him. 'Is that what he thinks of me?' Tears fell down her face, angry and hurtful tears, as she glared at him standing across from her. But he was emotionally gone from her. His posture and his eyes said it all. He saw nothing more than a whore, someone who sold herself to men for money, on top of having a clueless boyfriend.
"Did you have sex with them?" Even as the words came out, Inuyasha knew the truth without having to ask. He would've known if she had sex with Sai, or any other man, because they worked together and she wouldn't be able to hide a male's scent from him if they had sex. He would've smelled their sex on her and in her, no matter how many showers she took. But that wasn't why he knew the truth. He knew the truth because of the way she reacted to men touching her, because of the way she was the first time they had sex together. There was no way Kagome would sell herself to men, not after the history with men she had. But even though he knew this truth, he was hurt, and he wanted to hurt her back. He loved her and trusted her. But she was nothing but a liar. She was no better than Kiyomi.
Kagome felt her heart break in two, standing there across from him, her fists clenched at her sides. The feeling of betrayal and loss overwhelmed her, making her whole body shake and tears come streaming down her face. Her tears made her even more angry, but more at herself, that she had let him love her and that she had fallen so in love with him. Right now, she hated him. She hated him for thinking so lowly of her. She hated herself for loving him.
"I am not a whore."
With that being all she had to say to him, she turned and walked to the door, heading into his bedroom to grab her purse. Without another look back, she left. There was no turning back from this. He had hurt her too deeply, as she was sure that she had hurt him too deeply. The things that were said, the lies that she had lived, all of it had come spilling out tonight and they were doomed from the start. Kagome squared her shoulders as she angrily wiped the heartbreaking tears from her eyes. She would not cry. If he was going to see her as a whore, then their relationship was done. She would not cry. She knew who she was. And she was not a whore.
Yet... as she waited for the elevator to arrive... the fact that Inuyasha saw her as a whore hurt more than anyone could ever see in her or say about her. She got her identity from him. The way he saw her was the way she saw herself. It was because of him that she felt more comfortable in her body and in who she is. And if he saw her as a whore... perhaps she was. The fact that Inuyasha could not stand to be around her, that he had blocked himself off from her and distanced himself from her, hurt more than anyone ever could hurt her. He hurt her more than Koga ever did, physically or emotionally. She would take Koga's abuse over Inuyasha's rejection any day. And that was her greatest fear come true... Inuyasha's rejection.
The elevator dinged before the doors opened and she bent down to put her shoes on quickly. Before she stood, she left her keycard on the ground, never intending to return. There was no going back from this. She truly did not deserve him, and she would not settle as someone's whore. 'Oh Kagome... that's all you've ever been... from Father to Koga to Sai to Inuyasha... you've just been someone's whore...' As the elevator doors closed, fresh tears rolled down her face as she realized who she really was.
-'-'-'-'-'-'-'-'-'-'-
A few hours later, Miroku and Sango stepped out of the elevator, tired and happy from their dinner with their parents. They were both a little tipsy from all the alcohol they drank in celebration of their concert next weekend on top of their wedding that was just around the corner. At dinner, they talked about wedding plans, which made all the night more special as they got to look ahead to what their special day would soon be like.
"Ouch!" Sango stumbled after stepping on something. The hallway light was on near the elevator, giving both of them enough light to see whose shoes she stepped on.
"What is it?" Miroku asked, bending to grab what Sango stepped on. He frowned, recognizing it. "It's a keycard."
"Who's is it?"
Miroku shrugged, looking at the shoes left in the cubbies near the elevator. "It's gotta be one of theirs. But Inuyasha's shoes are here. Mmmm... I don't see Kagome's." Sango looked and noticed that hers were gone as well.
"Hmmm... maybe she went home for the night?"
"On a night like this?" he asked, seeing her understanding. He also knew how much this night meant for Inuyasha since they had that talk before he left. "I'm gonna go check on Inuyasha."
He walked towards Inuyasha's room, hearing Sango following behind him in her worry. He knocked once, then twice. And when he knocked a third time, he opened the door and walked in.
"Inuyasha?" he called out.
The room was dark, save for the light spilling in from the outside balcony. He spotted Inuyasha on one of the chairs, and with his suspicions proving him right, Kagome was nowhere to be seen. He walked towards the sliding door and got out into the cool air, taking in the sight of the black-haired Inuyasha.
"Inuyasha." The guy didn't move at first so he walked to stand in front of him, taking in Inuyasha's predicament. Miroku could tell that his friend was passed-out drunk. There were two empty sake bottles on the coffee table and Inuyasha was slumped over in a chair. 'Damn.'
"Inuyasha. Wake up," he said sternly, going to Inuyasha's side to wake him. But Inuyasha was really out of it. Not to mention his alcohol tolerance was much lighter now that he was human. Miroku had a feeling that the guy drank himself to oblivion.
"Ugh... what the hell happened," he said to himself, moving to grab Inuyasha's arms to pull him upright. Inuyasha finally stirred, mumbling under his breath. "Inuyasha. What happened? Where's Kagome?" Inuyasha sloppily pushed him away, mumbling something about Kagome.
"What?" Sango asked, coming up to the other side of Inuyasha. Miroku put up his hand, keeping her away.
"Stay back, Sango. He's drunk. I don't want him accidentally hitting you." He watched her battle the need to be there for her friend, but then he focused his attention back on Inuyasha. He grabbed Inuyasha's arm this time and tugged him forward, urging Inuyasha forward and up with momentum. Thankfully, he got Inuyasha up like dead-weight with an arm over his shoulder until the guy had enough conscious to try to walk.
"Mmmm... Kagome..." Inuyasha mumbled, trying to keep himself up but Miroku was the one walking for them and carrying most of his weight.
Sango couldn't help herself and went to Inuyasha's other side, wrapping his arm over her shoulder to hold him up. The two of them dragged Inuyasha back into his room, all the while listening to his mumbles but never getting a complete sentence out of him.
"What happened, Inuyasha?" Miroku tried again, worried that something really bad had happened between him and Kagome. He had never seen Inuyasha this drunk before, especially when he was a human. And when he was his normal self, it took a lot of alcohol to get him drunk, and even then he wasn't this bad.
Inuyasha moaned as the two of them dropped him on the bed, shifting him so that his head could at least hit the pillow. "Kagome... lied..."
"Lied about what?" Sango asked as Miroku lifted Inuyasha's legs onto the bed, not even bothering to get the covers out from under him. Sango moved so that she was at Inuyasha's head, watching his angry expression as he snuggled into the pillow. "What did Kagome lie about?"
"Everything," Inuyasha said, slurring his word. "She lies. Just like Kiyomi."
Sango frowned, surprised that Inuyasha compared Kagome to Kiyomi. 'What the hell happened?' It wasn't possible. What could the two possibly have in common?
"Kagome left, Inuyasha," Miroku said, hoping he realized what happened. "She's gone and left her keycard."
"I don't care," he mumbled, his words slowing down. He shifted to his side, turning his back to them to drape his arm over the empty bed as if someone was there. "Lies."
They both remained quiet as his breathing grew deeper and he fell back unconscious. Sango turned to look at Miroku with wide, worried eyes.
"I'm calling Kagome," she said, moving to grab her purse from outside where she dropped it to help Inuyasha. Miroku followed her outside, trying to get her to see reason.
"Sango, it's late. Kagome's probably sleeping by now."
"But what if she didn't go home. What if something happened between them, then she left and now she's just like him, drunk somewhere? What if she's hurt like he is and drank herself into oblivion?!" She knew she was sounding hysterical, but she couldn't help but worry. Her best friend was drunk unconscious, so bad that she had never seen him this way. And the reason he got into this horrible state was because of something that happened with Kagome. And she needed to find out if Kagome was okay.
She took out her cell phone and called Kagome as Miroku stood next to her silently, his eyes going between her and the sleeping body on the bed. She watched Miroku's anxious, worried eyes as he worried about Kagome too. But after a few seconds, the call went to voicemail. She hung up and tried again. Then she tried again. When she was about to call for the fourth time, Miroku stopped her.
"Enough, Sango."
"Let me at least leave a message," she said, pulling her phone away from him to dial one last time. When the call went to voicemail, she tried not to sound hysterically worried. "Kagome, please... call me back. I'm worried about you. I need to know that you're okay, that you're safe. I need to talk to you. I'm worried. Please. Call me."
Miroku watched as she hung up and he grabbed her purse off the chair, wrapping an arm around her to urge her back into the room. "Come on. There's nothing else we can do. We'll talk to Inuyasha tomorrow when he's feeling better." He closed the sliding door and followed her slowly back out of Inuyasha's room. He stopped to look back at Inuyasha sleeping, wondering what had happened between him and Kagome for this night to have gone so wrong.
-'-'-'-'-'-'-'-'-'-'-
The light hurt his eyes. His head hurt too. Inuyasha groaned, noticing his throat felt raw and dry, but swallowing only made it worse. He slowly opened one eye then regretted it. He had a headache. 'What the hell happened?'
He recalled his memories from last night to try and figure out where he was and what happened. The last thing he remembered was that familiar feeling of turning human. And Kagome. She was there. 'That's right.' Bits and pieces flooded back to him about their long talk. He had exposed his secret and she had exposed hers. All of hers. Or maybe there were more. But he didn't care anymore. She had so many secrets, so many lies that she had told him. Their relationship was built on lies, so many lies that he wasn't even sure if she truly did love him. Then the last thing he remembered was that she left and he drank himself to numbness before he had passed out and he couldn't remember what happened after that.
Inuyasha blinked, trying to get used to the streaming light into his room. It was later than he usually woke up. He sat up slowly, feeling the pounding in his head, reminding him he needed water. Thankfully, the hangover wasn't as bad as he'd had while a hanyou. Speaking of... He kept blinking his eyes open, trying to adjust to the light, and knew that he was his normal self again.
Sitting there for a moment, he took inventory of his body. He felt the same, but something was missing. He opened his eyes to see that he still was in the clothes he wore last night. He looked to the empty bed he slept on, feeling like something was missing. He quickly dismissed the thought and slid off the bed to clean himself up, take a shower and head out for coffee.
The shower was exactly what he needed, the cold water helping with his headache, and by the time he was walking out of his room, he felt much better but with a slight headache. Still, something was missing. Something felt off.
Inuyasha headed to the kitchen and knew that both Miroku and Sango were in there, talking. He walked in and both of them turned to look at him. They were sitting at the island, looking at him with faces of concern.
"What?"
Miroku brushed off Inuyasha's gruff question, knowing his friend's quirks. "Perhaps you can tell us what happened last night?"
Inuyasha shrugged, going about his business of making him a cup of coffee. "I got drunk. I don't remember going to bed, but I'm fine."
"We got you to the bed," Miroku said as Sango shifted at his side, but thankfully remained quiet. He could feel Inuyasha's tension and knew that something could set him off, but only because Inuyasha was trying to protect himself. He knew his best friend so well. If Inuyasha didn't want to talk, he would do everything he can to deflect and be hot-tempered.
"Thanks, if that's what you're waiting for."
"What I'm waiting for is to know what happened between you and Kagome last night."
Inuyasha shrugged again, keeping his back to them. "We talked. She left." Saying it out loud was harder than he thought. It felt like a sharp pain to his heart. She left. Again. Another woman left him.
"What did you guys talk about?"
"What does it matter? She left. We're done."
Miroku slammed his hand on the counter in anger, the sound jolting, even making Sango jump. "Inuyasha! I'm sick of your damn attitude! Stop acting like you don't care because I know you do. We care too. We came home to find Kagome's keycard on the ground and you passed out drunk on your balcony. Something is wrong," he said, his temper cooling the more he talked and tried to calm down. "We just want to help. We're worried about you, and Kagome."
Inuyasha simply made his coffee, letting the mundane, every day task let his mind and heart slip away. He didn't want to think about it or let himself feel it. He just wanted to make his coffee and go back to his room where he could be alone and away from his friends who cared too much. Right now, he didn't know how to process their friendship since he was trying to process his loss. It was too much. He was overloaded with emotions and he was trying not to think about what he was feeling, or to feel what he was feeling. It was easier to harden his heart from all of it. The coffee and the silence was much more to his liking, letting the smell of the brewed coffee calm his racing heart and bring a sense of normalcy for once since he woke up this morning.
He froze, startled, when he felt arms wrap around his waist. He realized it was Sango as she pressed herself against his back, tightening her hold on him. He hadn't even heard her get up from her chair or walk towards him, that's how lost he was in drowning everything out. But the feeling of her around him started to break down his walls. He took in Sango's scent, letting that feminine scent and her touch seep into his cold, broken heart. He would never admit this to anyone else, but to those closest to him. To his closest friends, like his family, he could be himself without having to put up a wall.
"Inuyasha..." Miroku's hand fell on his shoulder, making him turn to look at his best friend, seeing Miroku's sad smile. "We're here for you."
Inuyasha flattened his ears, feeling the weight of those words lighten the heaviness he felt in his heart. Something was missing. And his friends were here to help him, to listen, to be there for him when he felt like his world had fallen apart. Nothing was right. Something was missing and he didn't know what was wrong with him. But to feel his friends being here for him, that meant the world to him.
"Thanks... Miroku," he said, smiling in thanks. He turned and lifted his arm up to look down at Sango's head. "Thanks, Sango." She released him with tears in her eyes.
"I'm worried, Inuyasha. I haven't heard from Kagome and I'm worried if she made it home safe. And I'm worried about you. What happened?" Miroku brought her into his side as they faced Inuyasha, hoping that he would finally open up to them.
Inuyasha sighed, knowing it would be better to tell them now. Plus, if he was honest with himself, he needed them right now. He felt too lost to be alone or to figure it out on his own. He needed his friends to help him. So he finished making his coffee and urged the two of them to follow him to the living room. They sat on the couch with Inuyasha in the middle since Sango and Miroku both wanted to show him their support by being close to him and surround him with their love.
After a few moments and a few sips of his coffee, Inuyasha started with the first thing he could think of. "I showed her my human form last night."
Miroku nodded, remembering that was Inuyasha's desire for having Kagome over last night. It would've been the first time she had seen his human form. "And how did she take it?" He hoped that Kagome hadn't rejected Inuyasha because of it. That was Inuyasha's greatest fear, that Kagome would reject him. The same way Kiyomi had. It would be for different reasons, but his fear of rejection from a woman he loves was his greatest fear and biggest trauma.
Inuyasha shrugged. "She was fine with it." He tried to recall the conversations they had before he started to see red. "She saw me. She didn't care if I had black or silver hair. She only saw me, and she loved me." The last part was hard for him to get out, saying it in the past tense.
Miroku and Sango met eyes, sharing something, before Miroku decided to speak. "That was the biggest worry you had last night."
Inuyasha nodded, thinking of her reaction. "Yeah, but she already knew about hanyous' human times. She told me about the times she was homeless as a child and had hanyou friends. The children explained to her about their human times."
"Well... she knew about it but just didn't know when yours was, nor did she judge you on having one."
Inuyasha nodded, thinking about that. Kagome could've known this whole time that he had a human night, but she never asked.
"Yeah..." He thought about their next conversation, that led to several others that went downhill. Things got worse and worse, until... He hung his head, placing his mug down on the coffee table so that he could rest his elbows on his knees. "I don't understand why..."
"Why what?" Sango asked, placing a hand on his thigh, trying to give him comfort when she could see he was clearly hurting. She gave him space to speak, waiting patiently for him to say what was on his heart.
"I asked her to be honest with me, the same way I was with her. I asked her to share her secrets with me, the same way I did with her. And the first thing I asked her... was her real name."
Sango blinked, confused. "Her real name?"
"Her name, her birth name, is Kagome Higurashi. Her parents... they were drug addicts and cared nothing about her. She endured a lot growing up at their hands. So I know she has that self-dependence in order to keep herself alive. I know that because I've been there too. I know what it's like to have to take care of yourself or else someone would kill you. She lived in self-preservation her whole life, and I know what that's like."
Miroku nodded his head, remembering his talk with Inuyasha last night. He was worried that their own self-preservation would break them apart. They would both be too worried about protecting themselves that they would only end up hurting each other. And it seems like that's what happened in the end. Their own self-protection became their undoing.
"Then... I find out her ex's name. Only thing he's not her ex... he's her husband."
Miroku sunk back into the couch, staring at the walls in front of them. "Woah..."
"Wait," Sango said, taking it back. "Her husband? She's married to him?" She watched Inuyasha's nod, though he kept his head hung, and felt her heart drop at his confirmation. "And you know this guy?"
Inuyasha chuckled. "I know his entire family. They rule over Shikoku Island and parts of the southern lands. Their wolf pack is spread out all over Japan but they mainly reside in the south."
"Wolf pack?" Miroku said aloud to himself. "He's a youkai?"
Inuyasha nodded. "You guys met him before."
Sango gasped, remembering a mated wolf pair who had attended one of his family's charity events years ago. They stood out to her because of the power and entitlement they exuded but also because of their beauty together as a couple. "Yes. I remember he had a mate with red hair. But I forget their names."
"Koga and Ayame Nakashima," Inuyasha provided for them.
Miroku placed a hand on his forehead, leaning his head back. "Mates? So he has a mate and he's married to Kagome?"
Inuyasha nodded, lifting his head as he stared down at his coffee in front of him, envisioning that wolf's face. "It's common for the males to have harems, at least the higher up the pack you are, the more females you mate with to pass on your genes. It's a part of their culture."
Sango made a face. "Well it's sickening."
There was a silence between them as they all thought about the fact that Kagome was married, to a wolf youkai nonetheless, but that she had hid that from them all this time.
"I don't understand..." Miroku said, lifting his head back up to stare at the back of Inuyasha's. "We did background checks on her when we hired her."
"Exactly. I don't know how, but she must have friends in high places. She got all of her records changed or destroyed. That's why there's nothing on her birth or anything before she came to Tokyo. And what little there is, they're all lies."
Lies. She had told him so many lies.
"She lied to me, Miroku," he said, pained. "She lied about her name. She lied that she was single, and that she was still married to this ex. Hell, she lied about working at a gentlemen's club!"
"Woah... what?" Sango said, hearing his angry explosion at the next revelation. She couldn't believe that Kagome would lie about all these. Maybe she omitted telling them because she had a good reason. She wanted to give Kagome the benefit of the doubt because she liked Kagome and respected Kagome. They were friends.
"She works at a gentlemen's club?" Miroku asked, slowly moving to mimic Inuyasha's position, resting his elbows against his knees. He saw Inuyasha's nod and he shook his head in disbelief.
"I don't know which one. But she's a gentlemen's girl. And I've been to several in my lifetime. The things they do... they're pretty much working girls, paid to do whatever you want them to do if you have the money for it."
Sango flinched at Inuyasha's hurtful words, and the way he said them. She couldn't believe that Kagome was that kind of a person, someone who would give her body away for money. "You don't know that, Inuyasha. You don't know what Kagome actually does."
Miroku sighed heavily, hoping that Sango was right, but knowing what a gentlemen's club and the working girls were all about. "Inuyasha... Sango's right."
He chuckled, looking over his shoulder at the guy. "Sounds like you don't agree with her as much as you say." They met eyes and the both of them knew. A gentlemen's club was a sophisticated term for the red-light district. What difference was a strip club from a gentlemen's club? One just held more power and money over the others. Power and money that was dressed up and it was easier to keep the secrets hidden to protect identities and reputation.
Miroku sighed again, shaking his head in disbelief. He couldn't believe that Kagome had been working as a gentlemen's girl this whole time, when they had believed she was working late nights as a waitress. Now he understood Inuyasha's hurt. He was angry and hurt that she had kept all these secrets from him and he was probably angry at himself for not seeing the signs. Miroku would feel the same way in his shoes. But most of all, Miroku knew that Inuyasha felt hurt. Betrayed, even. These were deep kept secrets and it was like Kagome was living two lives.
"I'm sorry, Inuyasha..." Miroku said, hoping to offer some sort of comfort, but knew that Inuyasha would have to work out the betrayal in his own way. He just hoped that Inuyasha would go to Kagome and talk with her, work it out with her. That would be the only way to move on, whether that was together or separate.
Sango jumped up when her phone rang, blaring through the silence. She went to the counter to read who it was. "Kikyo. What? I... I don't know. Wait, what? Okay. Okay. Bye." She looked at her phone to see twelve missed text messages from the gang. "Damn. Our phones are blowing up."
"What time is it?" Miroku asked.
"It's almost eight-thirty," she said, checking the group text when her eyes widened. "Oh no..."
"What?" Miroku asked, watching as she slowly walked back with her eyes on her phone, standing on the opposite side of the table.
"Everyone's asking why Kagome quit."
"What?" Miroku asked, shocked. But Inuyasha remained quiet, silently knowing that this was the end of the end. He had known in his gut that something had been off all morning, and that things were only going to get worse.
"What the hell is going on?!"
Everyone turned to see Kikyo coming into the kitchen, dressed in black yoga pants and a black tank top.
"Oh yeah. Kikyo's coming," Sango informed them, going to sit back down next to Inuyasha.
"What the hell is going on, Inuyasha?" Kikyo demanded, coming to stand next to the coffee table. She didn't expect to see this scene that was before her, and it took her aback. Her anger and shock simmered away after she saw Inuyasha's face. "Inuyasha?" He avoided her eyes, looking at the ground in front of him. She looked between Miroku and Sango. "Will someone tell me what's going on? Why did I get a text from Kagome saying that she quit?"
"Is that what she said?" Inuyasha asked with a chuckle, feeling his walls immediately starting to go back up. 'If that's what she wants, then I'm fine with that. It'll be easier to get over her if she's not working with us.' Yes. He just needed Kagome to get out of his life completely so that he could get over her, the same way he got over Kiyomi.
Kikyo blinked, totally not expecting that response from him. "Yes, that's what she said. She also wished me all the best and wanted nothing but success for my career. What the hell happened between you two?" She felt on the verge of losing her mind because of the pressure she was on with the concert coming up, and now losing one of her best dancers. She knew that the only reason why Kagome would just up and quit out of the blue like that was if something had happened between her and Inuyasha. She had seen their breakup once, and that was awkward for the two of them to be working together but not being together romantically. She knew what that was like. But this was totally not like Kagome, or Inuyasha, to be acting this way.
Sango sighed when Inuyasha didn't respond. "They got into a fight last night."
"No. We're done."
The three of them were shocked, quiet, looking at each other to figure out what to say. Miroku put his hand up to silence Kikyo and she just crossed her arms, frustrated at Inuyasha's attitude.
"Inuyasha... you're not done," Miroku said, focusing his attention on his friend. "I know that you still love her."
"Love isn't enough," Inuyasha said, growling in anger. "Love wasn't enough for Kiyomi! And it's not enough for Kagome!" He jumped to his feet in a rage, unable to sit still any longer. He walked to the sliding door so that he could pace back and forth, trying not to feel love for Kagome. But failing. "Did I ever give Kagome a reason to believe that I didn't love her enough? Why would she keep all these secrets from me? Did she not love me enough?" he asked to no one in particular but kept flailing his hands in the air in desperation.
Sango and Kikyo frowned, hearing his pain and anguish. The three of them could tell that he still loved her, even if he said they were done and he acted like he was ready to move on. If he didn't love her, he wouldn't be this in denial, this in heartbreak and pain over her.
"Inuyasha..." Sango started, "You still love Kagome. And I'm sure she still loves you. The both of you love each other deeply."
"How do you know?" he asked bitterly, turning his anger out on her.
"Because I've seen the way she is with you," Sango said with confidence. "I've seen the way she is with men, with men touching her, and I see her with you and I can tell that it's different. You are different to her. I've seen the two of you together and I see true love between you two."
Kikyo moved uncomfortably. It was a tough pill to swallow to know that Inuyasha was desperately in love with Kagome.
"Inuyasha... in your heart of hearts... do you truly believe that Kagome is like those women?" Miroku asked. He didn't want to say what Kagome did with Kikyo around because he felt like this was a secret that Kagome guarded with her life. She will tell everyone when she was ready. "Do you truly believe, knowing all you know about Kagome, that she would do all of those things?"
Inuyasha stopped pacing and instead, turned to look out at Tokyo Tower. He thought about it, but he really didn't have to think. He knew the truth. He knew it last night. And she had tried to tell him, but he refused to listen. He was too hurt to hear her out. She kept telling him he didn't understand, but he didn't want to understand. He didn't want to hear her words because in his mind, he believed the fears he told himself. He feared that she had cheated on him, that she didn't love him enough, that she was selling her body to men while coming home to him. He feared that he was being played by another woman, and he had fallen in love for nothing once again only to get his heart ripped out. All of his fears were coming true and his feelings overruled his rational thinking. In his heart, he knew that Kagome wasn't like those gentlemen girls.
"I hurt her, Miroku," he confessed, remembering the things he told her last night. It all came flooding back to him now that he felt remorseful. The possibility of forgiving her meant the possibility that he was wrong, and that he had hurt her beyond her forgiving him.
"I'm sure you both hurt each other," Miroku affirmed
"But you both love each other more, Inuyasha," Sango said. "Every relationship has its ups and downs. There's going to be hurt and joy and anger and love. That's a relationship. But what makes a relationship strong is communication. You can't run from your problems, Inuyasha. You need to talk it out with her, understand where she's coming from and why she did what she did. That's how love works. It understands, it forgives and it continues to love no matter the hurt." Miroku nodded his agreement, though his friend kept his back towards them.
Kikyo listened and watched the interaction, feeling like an outsider. She loved and agreed with what Sango said, but it was also an ugly mirror of what her relationship with Inuyasha had lacked. It lacked all those things, and it hurt her to hear that that's what Inuyasha has with Kagome. Because she knew that he would go to her, he would go to Kagome and work it out because he loved her that much.
"I just... I don't know if she'll forgive me," Inuyasha said, turning around to look at them with hopeless eyes.
"All you can do is try, Inuyasha. You have to go to her and talk to her. The both of you hurt each other because you were hurt by each another. So to protect yourselves, you both hurt the other person and then ran away when it got too much. But I'm telling you, Inuyasha... you need to go to her and talk to her. I'm sure she needs you just as much as you need her right now," Miroku said, truly smiling for once this entire morning.
Inuyasha felt a stillness and calm wash over his heart at Miroku's words. He was right. Kagome wasn't Kiyomi. What he had with Kagome was nothing compared to what he had with Kiyomi. He said those things last night to hurt Kagome because she had hurt him, and reminded him of how Kiyomi had hurt him. But she wasn't Kiyomi. And he took his pain and anger out on her without hearing her out. He needed to go and talk to her. He didn't want to think of what the outcome could be. For now, he just wanted to be with her. That's what was missing. The whole morning since he woke up, he felt like something was missing. The thing that was missing was Kagome. He was missing the other half of his soul.
"Fine."
Sango jumped up and ran to him, hugging Inuyasha tightly. He turned in her arms and smiled down at her, wrapping his arms around her.
"Thanks, Sango."
"I'm always here for you, silly," she said, releasing him as Miroku came up behind her.
The two nodded their heads, sharing a knowing look, and then they turned to look at Kikyo.
"So... are you guys together or not? Did I just lose one of my best dancers?" Kikyo asked, seeing the determination and change in Inuyasha. On one hand, she didn't want to lose a great dancer. On the other hand, she didn't want Kagome to come back since she was a rival for Inuyasha's attention. But in truth, Kikyo wanted them to be together because she saw how happy Inuyasha was with her, and now that she saw how broken he was without her, she never wanted to see him like this again.
Inuyasha went to grab his mug to take a few last sips as he walked to the sink. "I'll let you know. For now, have everyone still meet and practice at the academy. Kikyo, you can practice the parts I taught you for now. Everyone else can go through the entire lineup with the transitions we made so far. I need to talk to my brother and then... I'll talk to Kagome.
Everyone made their way to the kitchen to pack everything up and get ready to leave.
"I'll text the gang that we'll be running late and give them an update since everyone is worried. But don't worry about us if you don't come in today," Miroku said confidently.
Inuyasha smiled, thankful for his friends that they were there for him. "Thanks." He needed to talk with Sesshomaru before he went to see Kagome. He needed time, but he knew for certain that he loved her and he was going to make this right. He loved her too much to lose her.
How's that? I hope I didn't throw you into an emotional wreck slash cliffhanger feels. It came out of nowhere for me that their conversation would've gone so south to the point of ending how it did. But it was a lot to take in for our poor Inu :( And Kags... to confess everything while feeling judged and condemned from the one person she feared rejection from. Funny how they match each other both in love/lust and in rejection/hurt, all because of their past. Hence the name of the story :) LMK what you think
