It's Just you're Subconscious
Author's note: Sorry for the long wait, I had a lot to write! I recently wrote a one-shot, and then I had to update a fiction; I'm co-writing with a friend. Even though I don't reply to reviews, I do appreciate them! I just tend to get a little lazy in that area! ) Also I'm sorry for the short chapter; I struggled writing this for some reason.
Chapter Seventeen: Sensations, Girl Talk and Jack 'o lanterns
He had her against a wall, her hands pinned, but she wasn't afraid; she felt completely safe with him. However, he was driving her wild; he kissed her neck, eliciting moans from her. He continued to kiss her tenderly; he trailed down her collarbone making her gasp a little. She wanted to grab onto him, but he wouldn't allow it and kept her hands pinned to the wall. He growled her spaghetti strap shirt was in his way; he let go of her hands for a few seconds as he removed the shirt quickly. He looked up into her soft blue eyes; she looked into his loving amber ones, as his lips crashed down into hers.
She whimpered into his mouth, her hands running through his hair, driving him wild. Her whole body was on fire, as he touched her, and kissed her; she was wild with desire for him.
He pulled her away from the wall, she went willingly with him, she found she was now laying on a bed with him in top of her; she felt his hands wander down and rest on her thighs. Her breath hitched a little as his hands caressed her thighs, as he continued to kiss her.
He pulled away and stared into her eyes, he had a mischievous glint in his eyes, "Sienna…" He whispered nibbling at her ears, his breath tickling her a little bit.
She whimpered again, "Remus…" She whispered.
Sienna flew up in a sweat, her body was on fire, and she was definitely aroused by that dream; but she suddenly felt cold by the lack of body heat next to her. "It was only a dream…" She whispered to herself shivering.
She wrapped her arms around herself trying to stop shaking, she looked out the window and saw day was breaking, she decided to take a cold shower to calm herself down. Ana and Lily were still asleep, she quietly slipped out of bed, grabbed her robes and tip-toed to the bathroom.
Once in the bathroom, she laid her robes on the counter and stripped down, turning on the shower, she made sure it was cold, and then she jumped in. She refrained from letting out a yelp, when the cold hit her, but it seemed to cool her off from that dream.
She couldn't get it out of her head, it was still so vivid in her mind, but the more she thought about it, the more she had to stay in the cold shower; to keep herself calm. She frowned as she scrubbed her hair, lathering the soap up.
She always thought it was the males that were preoccupied with sex, and here she was getting feelings she had never experienced in her life. For some reason she felt extremely ashamed to say she enjoyed this feelings.
She ducked her head under the water and rinsed out all the soap, trying to erase the images from her mind. Why was she suddenly feeling like this?
She hadn't the foggiest idea, it was worse when Remus was around and he'd brush up against her or give her an innocent kiss; it always made her feel like she was on fire, or that sparks were going through her body.
She wondered often if he felt like that. As the weeks progressed and she was having these feelings increase, she had a hard time restraining herself from jumping him. It was horrible when they were alone; of course Sienna was pretty sure Remus was oblivious to her feeling this way.
…at least she hoped he was.
She stepped out of the shower and quickly dried off getting dressed, it would be another day of her trying to not act like she was avoiding Remus, but refrain from getting improper thoughts.
Once dressed she looked at herself in the mirror, she felt looked like crap, her hair was messy because she was a little too lazy to brush it; and her face was quite flushed despite the cold shower. She had slightly puffy cheeks, and her hair always seemed to be fuzzy and puffy when dry.
She shook her head. What is he thinking? There are how many other girls, that look so much better then I do. Yet, he asked ME out to Hogsmeade, he was jealous about someone else being with ME. I don't get it.
She sighed one last time, before turning and walking out of the bathroom, Ana and Lily were just starting to get out of bed, when they saw Sienna walk out.
Ana raised an eyebrow, "I think I just saw pigs fly." She said staring at Sienna blankly; Lily was rubbing her eyes to see if it was her eyes playing tricks on her.
Sienna rolled her eyes, "You people, act like I'm never up early." She said walking by Ana's bed; to her own to get her School Bag.
Lily snorted, "It's because, you never are…" Lily yawned getting up, and running to the bathroom before Ana could. Ana glared at the bathroom door as Sienna sighed shaking her head; her friends were insane.
She got all her books into her bag, and stood up, "Well, gonna go down to the Common Room, finish that essay, McGonagall wants done." She said.
Ana rolled her eyes, "You've got till tomorrow, you know." She replied.
Sienna shrugged, "I know, but I don't want to be in a rush to do it." With that, she opened the door and walked down to the Common Room.
James and Sirius were there playing Wizarding Chess. As she came down, both boys looked up and grinned, or at least Sirius did; James looked out of it.
Sienna sat down on the couch and Sirius said, "Hullo your sleepiness." He grinned.
Sienna yawned again, she was suddenly very tired again, "Hello, your annoyingness." She countered.
Sirius frowned, "Are you crabby?" He asked.
Sienna shrugged, "I'm tired, I had… I just couldn't sleep so I got up early." She replied, nearly slipping up about her dream.
Sirius raised an eyebrow, "Who know the world would end so quickly!" He grinned.
Sienna scowled, "Why, do you people find it so unbelievable, that I got up early?" She asked testily.
James sniggered, "Because Sienna-Poo, you always try and sleep as MUCH as you can; I always hear Ana screaming at you from here; in the mornings." He said taking one of Sirius' pawns.
Sirius scowled, "Stop that, mate." He said.
"You all are against me; you all joke around about me." Sienna yawned once again.
James laughed, "It's because you're funny." He said patting Sienna's leg.
She raised an eyebrow, "Gee, thanks Jamesy-Poo." She sighed, "It should be outlawed to get up in the morning. It should be a law that no one is to get up before noon." She replied.
James shook his head, "What about the people, that like to be up early in the morning?" He asked.
Sienna shrugged, "They're abnormal." She laughed a little.
Sirius chuckled, "Are you saying, Moony is abnormal?" He asked, when Sienna looked at him oddly, he continued, "Moony is always up about 6 AM sometimes a little earlier." He finished.
Sienna stared at Sirius in awe, her mouth hanging open slightly, "How? Why? What on earth, does it do that early? Why?" She asked looking quite dramatic.
James shrugged, "Study, read, bug us about how lazy we are, eat from his chocolate stash; come up with ways to take over the world, who knows what he does." James said pouting as Sirius took his pawn.
"Stop that, mate." James mocked Sirius' earlier statement.
Sirius rolled his eyes, "Grow up," He said as James took another one of Sirius' pawns, "JAAAAMES." He whined.
James clucked his tongue, "Now, who should grow up?" He grinned as Remus came down the steps from the boy's dorms.
Cue Sienna's mental breakdown. It wasn't that she didn't like Remus, oooh she liked him alright. That seemed to be the big problem. However, Sienna was so caught up in TRYING to write her essay, she didn't notice; Remus also seemed flustered.
James grinned, "Why'd you need that cold shower, Moony?" He asked elbowing Remus' knees.
Remus looked down and glared, "Shove it, James." He said testily.
Sienna looked up from writing and stared at Remus, having him say something like that sounded…weird. She didn't think she had ever heard him tell ANYONE to shove it before.
She went back to writing and sniggered to herself, as James and Sirius picked up after themselves. James had won that game, and Sirius was pretty sour about it. Ana at this time came down and sat down on the chair near the couch yawning.
Sirius sighed, standing up on the couch near Sienna and screamed, "I'M A LOSER BABY!"
Sienna raised an eyebrow, and blinked looking up at her insane friend; this was a man who was playing a serious game of chess a few moments ago?
Ana sighed, "Sirius, this is not news; we've known this for a while now." She commented and stood up from the chair. Sirius only glared mockingly at her before getting down off of the couch.
James stood up and grinned at Sirius who grinned back, "BREAKFAST!" They chorused and darted out of the Common Room at top speed, Ana trailing behind; sighing an exasperated sigh.
"They act like ravenous wolves." Remus said, Sienna looked up from her essay and took a good look at him. His hair was still wet, and slightly clinging to his face. His top two buttons were undone, making her raise her eyebrow slightly. She also had to fight to keep her blush away; he still hadn't but his black robe on. She wished he would.
She squirmed a little, "Yes, well, this is Sirius and James; two people who in their second year were found in the kitchens; going on some sort of binge." She said laughing lightly.
Remus grinned a little looking over at Sienna, "You have a point." He said.
Sienna didn't say anything, she didn't know what to say, "Sienna, you okay?" He asked.
Sienna looked up, "Huh? Why do you ask?" She replied.
Remus raised an eyebrow, "Because, you're chewing you're nails." He pointed out.
Sienna dropped her hands and laughed a little, "Oh, yeah, um… I'm okay." She replied.
Remus didn't look completely convinced, and when Remus wanted to know something, he would ask till he got an answer. "You're lying." He stated.
Sienna huffed, "Humph, I am not, Remus." She pouted at him.
Remus grinned, and scooted over to her, he leaned over her, and grabbed her school bag, and then proceeded to take her work out of her hands and put it in her bag.
She glared, "Remus, I got work to do." She said trying to snatch the bag from his fingers.
He laughed holding it above his head, "Not until you tell me what's wrong." He said.
What was she supposed to tell him? Gee Remus, I've been having erotic dreams about you. Yeah, that'd go over real well.
She continued to try and reach her bag, but he kept dangling it away from her, "REEEMUS!" She whined, leaning up against him to try and get it.
This was not the smartest move, because then Remus lost his balance, and came crashing down on the couch, with Sienna on top of him. This time no matter how are she tried, she could not keep the blush from creeping up on her face.
Remus actually looked surprised, but he was far from being shy about it. Sienna didn't move she just stared down at him surprised, and looking very red in the face. "Er…um…" She stuttered.
Scared she wouldn't be able to control herself, she quickly pushed herself off, snatched the bag from Remus' hands and went to run, but he was quick and he stood up; and grabbed her wrist turning her around to face him.
"Sienna… have I done something?" he asked seriously, looking down at her, she was fidgeting, and not able to make eye-contact without blushing.
"Um… yes, I mean no, I mean… I don't know…" She stuttered, he raised his hands away from her wrists and put them on her shoulder massaging them, with concern in his eyes.
"You can talk to me about anything." He frowned.
"I-I-I know, Remus." She said looking up and smile a bit, "I'm fine, really." She said smiling.
Remus sighed and leaned down and gave her a quick kiss, before grabbing his things, he still seemed upset. It wasn't really that she didn't want to talk to him; she just didn't know how to approach the subject.
You had you're chance, you had you're opening to tell him, and you blew it! She scolded herself; he's pissed at you now! She swallowed hard, "Remus, you're not upset are you?" She asked.
"No." He said quickly, not looking her way, with that he walked out of the portrait hole, Sienna sighed and sank down into the couch. She played out a scenario in her mind, on what he might say if she told him.
She kept coming up with the fact, he would feel… upset she was dreaming about him like that.
She growled to herself, this was going to be a long day.
Sirius sighed, "Mate, she's a woman, and women are mysterious." He had his school bag, in his hand, and both arms resting against the back of his head as he walked.
Remus sighed, "I just have this feeling, and she's keeping something from me. She's always flustered around me, and every time she looks up at me; she blushes." He sighed.
Sirius grinned, "Ah, okay." He said thinking hard about it, he had a slight inkling.
"So, why did you need a cold shower this morning?" Sirius asked seriously, looking over at his friend.
Remus looked at him annoyed, but said, "If I tell you, you can't go running to Sienna about it, got it?" He said.
Sirius shrugged, "Sure, now tell me." He replied.
Remus now looked flustered when Remus blushed a little Sirius raised an eyebrow, "What, you having dreams about her?" Sirius joked. When he looked down at Remus and saw he was very quiet, he broke out into laughter. "Moony, you sly thing!" He grinned slapping Remus on the back. "So, what are you doing in these dreams?" He asked.
Remus' face grew redder, "Um…" He trailed off, "So, Sirius how are you and Ana doing?" He said wishing he hadn't brought this up to Sirius.
Sirius smirked, it then trigged in his mind what Remus was dreaming about, "You're having sex dreams about her, aren't you?" He whispered a huge grin on his face.
Remus put his head down and Sirius laughed again, as Remus mumbled, "Yes."
Sirius then shrugged, "We're men, we're supposed to have sex dreams about out girlfriends. It's normal." He replied.
Remus rolled his eyes, " Normal, maybe for you, since you've got to be the horniest man; in the History of Hogwarts." Remus said dryly.
Sirius grinned, "What can I say, and you cannot tell me; you don't like these naughty thoughts about her." He replied, "Because whether you want to admit it; you probably like it." Sirius said.
Remus sighed, he should have gone to someone more mature… of course, James would have probably had the same responses, he was surrounded by a bunch of horny idiots.
Of course, he could have gone to Ana or Lily, who would have been serious about it, but that would have clarified their statement from earlier in the year, "He's one of the girls." Remus shook his head, and felt like saying, "Woe is me."
Most of the day was pretty uneventful, Remus had this feeling Sirius just knew something and it bothered him. The last class of the day was Potions and he; Lily and Sienna were paired up. They were making a sleeping draught.
Sienna was pretty talkative to him, and Lily, Lily was cutting up the ingredients and Remus and Sienna went up to the cabinet to get some supplies at the same time James and Sirius went up there.
Sienna had the book in her hand but tripped on her shoelace, that came undone, and she dropped the book. "Arrgh, I'm such a klutz." She muttered to herself. At the same time she stood up, Remus opened the cabinet door, and it hit her in the face.
"OW!" She yelped, dropping the book again, she put her hand to her face when Remus looked over panicked; he turned even more panicky when her hand left her face, and there was blood, and a tooth in her hand.
However, he couldn't tell if she was pissed at him or not, she had a contemplative look on her face.
She looked up and opened her mouth a little in pain, Professor Slughorn ran over in a rush, "Smile for me dear," He said she did so and Sirius burst into laughter.
"You look like a Jack 'O lantern!" He cackled madly, along with James.
Slughorn glared at the boys as Sienna pouted, "Enough, boys, one of you will take her to the Hospital Wing." He said sternly.
Sirius and James went to say they would went Sienna said, "Oh, no, I'm not having one of those clowns take me," She said holding her face. "Remus will." With that, she grabbed his hand with her other, and nearly dragged him out of the room.
The walk down there was hard for Remus, "Um… Sienna I'm sorry." He said.
Sienna shrugged, "I know." She replied.
There was silence again and he said, "Sienna, I'm really sorry." He said.
Sienna sighed, "I really know that Remus." She said a little sarcastically.
Remus went to say something when Sienna spoke up, "Remus, don't apologize again, I'm not mad. I'm annoyed at Sirius and James, not you." She said she hated to be talked to when she was in pain.
Every time she did talk, she sounded weird; finally they reached the Hospital Wing, Madam Pomfrey looked at Sienna and shook her head, "You students, the injuries you come to me with." She pushed Sienna down on a bed gently and started rooting around for a potion.
Remus still was feeling awful and Sienna could tell, "Accidents happen," She said looking over at him, she would have smiled but, it looked gross; in her opinion.
"Lupin, you can leave, she'll need to be here for at least an hour, before the potion has another tooth come in." She said waving her hand motioning for him to leave.
Sienna told him goodbye, and Madam Pomfrey gave her a potion that was green colored, it looked nasty. She drank it, but had to plug her nose. She coughed and spluttered but got down the nasty vile concoction. "Well, lay down, I'll let you leave in an hour." Pomfrey said walking over to another student. The Hospital Wing was full today for some reason.
Sienna sighed, she hated the hospital wing, she looked over outside, it was starting to snow. She felt her eyelids go heavy, and soon she was drifting off to sleep, the potion must have had something in it, it made her sleepy like a Muggle narcotic.
An hour later, Sienna was released which was around dinner time. Too tired and numb to eat, she passed the Great Hall and trudged to the Common Room.
Her tooth was now grown back, and she was in less pain, the Common Room was empty save for Sirius who was sitting on the couch messing around with something.
Ignoring him, she plopped down at the one of the tables, and pulled her books out; she laid them on the table. Sienna sighed deeply leaning against her school books that rested on the Gryffindor Common Room table; her head rested in the palms of her hands, and she seemed troubled. Sirius, the only one in the Common Room at the moment noticed this and grinned; he stuffed a bunch of small prank items in his robes, and stood up walking over to her. Sienna either didn't notice he was there, or she chose to ignore him, because when his shadow loomed over her, she did nothing.
He pulled a chair up, and threw an arm around her shoulder, making her roll her eyes slightly. "Yes, Sirius?" She asked, still not looking at him.
He smiled, "What's troubling you my dear Sienna?" He asked waggling his eyebrows.
She shrugged, "Nothing."
Sirius raised an eyebrow, "Aw, come on, you can tell ol' Siri, what's wrong." He cooed at her.
Sienna huffed, "Take a hint, 'Siri', and go." She snapped, maybe a little too harshly at him.
His face fell, "Well, I was only trying to help." He replied, going to stand up looking genuinely hurt, Sienna sighed feeling like a shmuck and said, "No, sit down, you and you're damn puppy dog pout." She said shaking her head, it was always a downfall.
Sirius grinned, "Awww, we gonna have girl talk now?" He asked, making Sienna raise an eyebrow, if he wasn't dating Ana, she would seriously question is sexuality.
"Whatever, it's about Remus…" She said trailing off, looking up at Sirius.
He raised an eyebrow, "What about, Moony?" He asked, feeling this was a strange coincidence Remus and Sienna were coming to him about each other.
"Well, lately, I've been having these feelings," She began trying not to blush. She had no clue why she was telling Sirius this, when she could easily go to Ana or Lily. "And I've been starting to have these… dreams about him." She said.
Sirius' eyebrows shot up, this was strange, he hid his grin, "What kind of dreams?" He asked, fighting not to laugh.
Sienna sighed, "Well, they aren't innocent, I'll tell you that." She said, "Anyway, I think he's angry. I mean I want to tell him, but I think he'd be repulsed I was dreaming about him like that." She finished.
Sirius again had to bite the inside of his cheek to keep from laughing, "Well," he said somewhat strained, "I say you talk to him, I know Remus; it won't be as bad as you think." He said.
Sienna looked at him with a raised eyebrow, "But what if, he becomes disgusted?" She asked.
"He won't." Sirius replied.
Sienna stood up with her books, "Thanks." She said walking away, she got to the couch and said, "But what if he does?" She asked.
Sirius shook his head, "He WON'T. Trust Me." He replied.
Sienna nodded and went to walk up the stairs to the girls dorm rooms, she then turned and said, "But, what if—"
This time Sirius cut her off, "Bloody Hell woman, I've known him longer then you trust me on this!" He said throwing his hands up in the air.
Sienna grinned, "Thanks Sirius!" With that, she ran up the steps with a smile on her face, hearing, "Yeah, Yeah," maybe Sirius wasn't so bad. It was nice to have friends to talk to, even if they could be immature idiots at times.
