Chapter 26: Small Bump (Alternating Points Of View)
I'm sure you're all sick of the Small Bump chapters, and if I'm making light of a miscarriage, I'm not meaning to, and I sincerely apologize. I just feel like this last one, with alternating points of view between characters not having points of view in the previous Small Bump chapters, will be a good one.
(Becky's POV)
I wake up, feeling cramping. They're like cycle cramps, but worse. I feel like something's wrong with the baby.
I shake Eret awake, terrified of what might be occurring.
"Eret…wake up. Something's wrong with the baby." Eret is up like a shot, helping me down the stairs to the stables out back to Skullcrusher.
"Hang in there, love. We'll be at Gothi's soon."
I hang on to Eret as tight as I can, and, soon, we reach Gothi's hut. Eret helps me off of Skullcrusher and sends him to get our families and Fishlegs. We enter the hut and tell Gothi the situation.
She gestures for me to lie down on the bed, so I do, with Eret's help. I squeeze his hand, waiting for our families and Fishlegs to arrive.
(Ruffnut's POV)
It's the middle of the night when Tuff and I hear a familiar roar outside our house. We look out the window.
Skullcrusher.
I get a sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach and I know my twin is getting the same feeling. After waking our parents, we rush to Gothi's hut after getting Fishlegs and Eret's father and sister.
Fishlegs hurries into Gothi's hut. I really hope Becky and the baby and Eret are all okay. The six of us that remain start pacing as best we can.
(Fishlegs' POV)
I rush into Gothi's hut to find Becky on her back, squeezing Eret's hand.
"Fishlegs, we might be losing our baby." Eret tells me, before turning to Becky.
"How's your pain, love?"
"It's not getting any worse, but it's not getting any better."
"You just breathe. I'm right here, and I'm not leaving you. I promise."
(Becky's POV)
Our families enter the hut, and Gothi, through Fishlegs, tells them only a few can stay besides Fishlegs.
I point, in too much pain to speak. My mother, my sister. Eret's sister.
The rest of them leave.
(Ruffnut's POV)
Amalie and I kneel at the side of the bed where Eret is while Mom goes on the other side of the bed.
"We're here, sis. We're right here." I say, stroking my sister's hair. Gothi gives Becky herbs for the pain.
That's when the bleeding starts, and Mom shushes Becky when she gives out little squeaks of sorrow.
Gothi spots the baby in the thick blood, but none of us can bear to look.
Becky turns away from us, ashamed.
(Becky's POV)
I…I did this…I killed my baby. It's all my fault. I barely notice Amalie and Ruffnut leaving. I barely notice Mom offering to stay with us until tomorrow, although I nod.
Mom sits next to me on the bed, stroking my hair as I start to silently cry.
I tell Eret to write everything down. Every sign, every moment we had with our baby. To remember everything.
Afterwards, I feel Eret get up and hear him leave. I let out a wail as soon as he's out the door. He hates me. I know he does. I let him down…I let the love of my life down and now he hates me. He's not alone in that, though…I hate me, too. For failing to carry my baby. I'm a failure. I begin to sob, ashamed and grieving.
Eret comes back in; I recognize his scent.
"…s…y…ault…ll…y...ault…" I sob out. I know it's my fault, all my fault. All my fault.
"My love…this…this isn't your fault. You've done nothing wrong." Eret couldn't be more wrong. I know I did something wrong to make my baby die.
"But I do know one thing: my Mum is watching our little baby as we speak."
I let another wail…I'll never get to meet that baby…our baby…I did this.
I soon cry myself to sleep, but I'm awake enough to hear Eret ask when we'll be able to try again.
It's too soon for him to ask that…I'll never be ready to try again…I can't take another heartbreak.
Eret begins to rub my back as the night goes on, and Gothi dismisses Fishlegs, knowing he won't be needed anymore.
I do eventually fall asleep, only to be plagued with nightmares about you-know-who and my son…and Anthony. No, not nightmares. Memories. Bad memories, but memories nonetheless.
The next morning, I wake up, hoping it was all a bad dream. The dried tears on my cheeks let me know otherwise.
"Hey, honey. You doing okay?" I nod at my husband, still too ashamed to face him.
"Let's get you home." I nod again, wordlessly. Eret helps me up and we ride Skullcrusher home.
When we get home, Eret helps me upstairs for some rest in our own bed.
"You let me know if I can do anything, alright?"
I nod.
"I love you so so much, Becky. Never forget that."
I burst into tears, sobbing. Eret is at my side immediately.
"Baby, what is it? Are you in pain?" I shake my head. No, not physical pain.
"You hate me."
"What?"
"You hate me, don't you?"
"My love, where on Earth did you get an idea like that?"
"Because I lost the baby. I failed you. I'm nothing but a failure. I hate me, too. Just…just go away, Eret. I just want to be alone."
(Eret's POV)
"Honey, I…"
"Just go away." I grant my wife's request, my heart breaking. I know she's grieving…but I'm grieving, too. I leave her to sob in peace. Alone.
I head downstairs and begin to sob.
"Mum…where are you when I need you?" I don't hear the front door open.
"Son…oh, son. I'm so so sorry." Dad. I break down, practically hyperventilating.
(Skullcrusher's POV)
I head over to where my Alpha is. I need to tell him this news, since he, along with his human, was the one who rescued Becky all those years ago.
"Skullcrusher? What are you doing here?"
I bow to my Alpha.
"My Alpha, I have distressing news. Eret's mate lost their young."
"Hiccup told me. Is she in any pain?"
"Not that I can tell."
"Skullcrusher!"
I turn and see Amethyst, Becky's dragon, coming towards us.
"Good evening to you, my Alpha."
"Good evening, Amethyst."
"Skull, what are you doing out here?"
"I had to tell our Alpha the news."
"What news?"
"Did I not tell you?"
"No. Skullcrusher, what's going on?"
"Becky…she lost her and Eret's young."
"Oh, no. They were so looking forward to having young of their own."
"I know. She's in a great deal of distress. I don't think she and Eret are speaking to one another."
"Maybe she just needs some time alone. I once lost an egg one year, when I was working for Drago."
"I am sorry, Amethyst."
"Thank you."
"Amethyst! I need to go for a flight, girl. Just the two of us." Becky walks over to us.
"I don't think that's such a good idea, Amethyst. She just lost her young."
"We'll be careful, Skull. She just needs some girl time."
(Amethyst's POV)
I allow Becky to get on me and I slowly and gently rise into the air.
Soon, she plants herself face first into me, beginning to sob.
"Oh, Amethyst, this is all my fault. I did something to lose the baby."
I croon to her to bring her some comfort. I know exactly where to go.
"Amethyst, where are you taking me?"
I stay silent as we land in the Cove, where Hiccup befriended my Alpha.
I get low to the ground so Becky doesn't have far to go to get off of me.
She breaks down and I wrap myself around her to provide her comfort.
My human is in such great pain, and I can barely do a thing to assist her.
"Becky! Sis! Where are you?" Becky looks up, all teary-eyed. I nudge her back to help her get up.
"Thanks, Amethyst."
My human's siblings land on Barf and Belch.
(Tuffnut's POV)
"We've been worried sick about you. Eret's been worried sick." My twin and I wrap our arms around our sister.
"I just needed time alone. With Amethyst."
"Next time, tell us when you run off like that."
"She led me here, guys. I had no idea where we were going."
"Are you doing okay?" I ask my sister.
"Physically, I'm okay for right now. Emotionally…I'm not doing too well."
"My love!"
We turn and see Eret running towards us, having just gotten off of Skullcrusher.
"I have been worried sick. I feared the worst, my darling."
My adoptive sister heads over to my brother-in-law.
"So, you really don't hate me?"
"My sweetie, I could never ever hate you. I promise you that."
"I'm sorry for running off. I just needed some time to myself."
"I figured. Next time, tell us where you're going."
"I will, Eret. And I'm sorry."
"It's alright, love."
"I just…I feel like a…a failure, you know? Because I couldn't hold our baby inside of me for very long."
"You're not a failure, Becky. You never have been and you never will be."
Eret wraps his arms around Becky as she begins to sob.
"I know, love. I know. I know."
Ruffnut and I soon leave to give them their privacy. And it's almost dinnertime.
~.~
When we get to the Great Hall, Hiccup tells us and Fishlegs to not mention the miscarriage to anyone else. It'll be hard, considering we're dealing with this loss, too.
(Becky's POV)
I'm soon cried out for a while, and Eret and I head to the Great Hall for dinner after feeding our dragons. We pause outside the doors.
"Now, you're sure you're up for this? I wouldn't blame you if you wanted to have dinner at home."
"We need to keep things as normal as possible. Act like nothing ever occurred."
"Are you serious right now? 'Act like nothing ever occurred'? We just lost our baby! How can you say that?"
"Because I don't want everyone to know yet, Eret! I'm not ready to let the others know."
"I'm sorry for snapping…I just…I don't want you treating this as if you broke your arm or something. It's a lot more serious than a broken arm."
"Don't you think I know that, Eret? I was the one who held our baby inside of me for three months!"
"I know you were. But who held your hair back when you got sick?"
"Really? You think this is about me going through morning sickness?"
"How dense can you get? I was the one who held your hair back when you got sick. I was the one who held your hand when we were losing our baby. This isn't just your loss, you know! It's my loss, too! I helped make this baby."
"You only did step one. I carried this baby."
"I'm not saying you didn't…you know what…just forget it. Look, honey…I-I'm sorry for snapping again. You're right. You're the one who carried the baby. All I did was help make them."
"I'm sorry for snapping, too. I hate it when we fight."
"I hate when we fight, too. I forgive you."
"I forgive you, too."
"Shall we?"
I nod. Eret wraps an arm around me and we head inside the Great Hall.
We make light conversation, until Gobber says…
"So…rumor has it you two are expecting a wee one."
I try not to show any emotion, and I succeed.
"So that's why you wanted to be left alone." Snotlout says, smirking at us.
"Yeah…" I glare at Eret. That's when one of Berk's newborns starts to cry.
"Excuse me for a minute." I get up and leave the Great Hall. I head down the steps as it starts to rain and thunder.
After a particularly loud clap of thunder, I scream, flinging my hands into the mud and I begin to throw it.
Eret soon appears in front of me
He takes my hands, stopping me from flinging anymore mud.
"Darling. Honey. Baby. Look at me. Look at me." I look up at Eret and fling myself towards him, sobbing.
"Shhh. I know, honey. I know. I know." Eret wraps his arms around me.
"It wasn't your fault. It wasn't your fault." Eret himself begins to sob.
We soon stop, and then tell the others the truth about what's been going on.
I break down again, and Eret doesn't hesitate to hold me close, telling me we'll get through this.
