Petra: groans This story never ends, it feels like....
Kati: Shush! It's almost over! I promise.
Petra: This is perhaps the most gushy yet angsty part of story where you will want to beat Duo's head with a rock.
Kati: In other words... Lots of fun!
Petra: snort
Kati: Well... I'm proud of it...
DEDICATED: For the gundam pilots; I would set them free of their memories and guilt if I could.
WARNING: Angst. Enough sweetness to rot out your teeth. An incredibly frustrating Duo. A singing, piano playing Heero...
DISCLAIMER: I don't own Gundam Wing. However, the goddesses are my own creation (based loosely on my friends).
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If You Could: Violet Eyes
" 'Does it still hurt?' 'All the time,' I whisper without thinking, a half-choked sob nearly following it, upset to the edge of tears with the cruelty of my life." -Tayles; Eternal One Night Stand (GW)
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Duo smiled and watched as Quatre went into the apartment across from his then sighed. When he'd woken up Heero had been gone with only a note that he 'gone out to get groceries' to show he'd even been there. Then, a half hour after he'd gotten up, Quatre had come over and demanded that they go out and do something so, no matter how much Duo had wanted to stay and see where these new developments was leading, they had gone out exploring.
He rolled his neck and felt it pop, feeling the tension of the day leak from his shoulders and an entirely different tension fill the empty space. As he stepped into the room he was surprised to smell pasta and then, movement made him look down at his feet. His eyes widened as he saw that his opening the door had scattered irises all across the room, out of the neat path they had been laid in. Irises, that were the exact shade of his eyes… That was when he noticed the balloon drifting in place before him, the note attached to it waving tantalizingly in front of his eyes, making him reach out and grab it, untying it. Duo was scrawled neatly across it and inside: 'Koibito, if you would not mind joining me on the balcony by following the path of violet irises, I would love to have dinner with you. Yours, 'Ro.' Duo giggled a little at the fact that he had signed it 'Hee-chan', before turning serious as he again saw the path of flowers. No lights were turned on, instead candles had been placed along the floor, lighting the way. As he turned the corner he stopped in surprise as he saw that there were five balloons to the door to the balcony.
Carefully he caught the first one. This one had the word, 'koi', scrawled across it. 'I still can't figure out why he calls me a fish.' He opened the note and, scrawled in Heero's familiar handwriting, it read: 'Dreams of Love; By Jessica Burnett. The way you look at me / is an epiphany on the / ages that time forgot / the sun and the moon / in the same dark ocean sky'
'Poetry…' Duo felt his heart begin to beat a little faster as he reached the next one, noting vaguely that this one was labeled 'koibito'. It read: 'And love loving hate / and hate surrendering to love / and when you touch me / I forget all rules of / flesh and I become / one with you, inside / your body and your mind / no longer just two / instead just one'
He felt a dark flush coloring his cheeks as he reread 'inside your body'. Absently, with the words still echoing in his head, he noticed that this one was labeled 'kokoro': 'snow flies in July / when you decide to smile / and when you laugh / the sun changes course / and disappears into my eyes'
Duo couldn't help but smile at that. The next read: 'And (if) if you say you love me / I die when I am alive / The sky isn't blue anymore / and it's underneath our feet' Love? Was Heero asking him to love…? He suddenly realized he hadn't read what it had been labeled. Then he gaped as it read, 'Koi/koibito Love/lover'.
He almost ran to the last one which had been labeled 'Kokoro heart/soul.' He almost tore the paper his fingers were shaking so badly as he tried to unfold it so he could read: 'Because with you / time can flow backward / and the grass can turn / any shade of the rainbow…'
Duo read it twice. It seemed like there should be more… Then, he started as he realized that gentle piano music was drifting through the door. Gently, softly, almost hesitantly, afraid that he would wake from what he was scared was a dream, he opened the door. Then, he could only stare in shock as what appeared to be a small forest sitting on their balcony. His gaze then drifted down to look at Heero who was dressed in a blue shirt that matched his eyes, baring the top half of his chest, and gray slacks, his feet bare. His fingers were running gracefully over the keys. At that moment Heero turned to look at Duo and, smiling a smile that made Duo's heartbeat increase dramatically, he said, "But never compare to you."
Then he stood up and, holding a single white rose, he handed it gently to Duo, saying, "I made dinner for you, koibito." Then, he gently took Duo's hand leading him farther into the forest and to a small picnic that was lit by candlelight. Gently, he sat Duo down and then sat next to the American, presenting the other with a plate. "You once said that you could live off pasta forever and that if you had one meal to eat before you die, you wanted it to be this."
Duo stared at him in shock. That had been a while ago, when he had thought that Heero didn't feel anything for him, and he had started talking about pasta because, at that moment, he hadn't known what else to talk about. He'd never thought Heero listened to him… He'd mentioned it once, but Heero still remembered. "Thanks…" Duo said, taking the plate. Heero watched closely as Duo picked up his fork and took a bite. A grin spread across his features as the delightful flavor spread over his tongue and down his throat. "Wow… 'Ro, this is really, really good!"
"Aa. I'm glad," and then Heero poured some champagne in two glasses.
"What, are you tryin' to get me drunk?" Duo asked jokingly, as he took a sip of the champagne.
Heero simply smiled and said, "Maybe."
After that there was quiet talking and more eating where Duo learned some of the memories that Heero had. At one point, Heero looked at Duo and asked, "Duo…?" Duo quirked his head and waited for Heero to continue. "Kokoro… do you believe in magic…?"
Duo stared at Heero, surprised at the question, answered right away, "I don't really know. I never thought about it…"
Heero looked at the sky for a moment and then looked back at Duo before saying, "I do. I believe that there's magic all around us and that we're so used to it we don't realize it's even there…"
"What about this…?" Duo motioned vaguely around him, at the forest that had seemingly just appeared on the balcony. "Is this, was this, magic?"
Heero looked around, at the trees and grass, at the beautiful boy sitting across from him and, without hesitation, said, "Hai."
Duo nodded, for Heero said it so honestly and so seriously, that Duo had no choice but to believe him. They say there in silence for a while and then Duo began to laugh, a soft sound, almost self-deprecating.
"What?" Heero asked, confused at the change in his love's mood.
Duo laughed a little more and than said, "What Relena wouldn't give to be here…"
"Yes, she'd probably give anything…" Heero said, watching Duo thoughtfully. "But she'll get over it and move on, just like I told her to."
Duo stared at him confused before asking, "What do you mean, 'like I told her to'?"
Heero smiled and leaned back against a tree. "Well, she stopped by to see me this afternoon. We talked. She left. Next time we meet, we're going to pretend it's the first time."
"Why?"
"Because I don't love her. I could never love her."
Duo tried to squash the hope rising in his chest. "Why?"
"I like boys…"
"Ah…"
"One boy in particular…"
"Ah…" The question 'who' almost tore Duo's throat apart, trying to get out. He couldn't help it, he was so scared to get his hopes up, but all the signs were pointing that Heero liked him, maybe even loved him… but it was still too much to ask. Too much was on the line and he didn't want to know if it was someone else.
"Who I love with all my heart…" 'Is that love in his eyes…? No, Duo, don't get your hopes up, man. It'll just hurt all that more when you fall crashing to the ground… Besides, he doesn't have the other half of the necklace.' Heero watched as Duo's hand rose unconsciously to clutch both dolphin and cross. "Duo…?" Duo looked up. "What do you fight for?"
The question surprised Duo and he wondered if Heero remembered when he had asked the same question. "Um… well… I guess… peace." Heero nodded and then waited. "Family… I always wanted a family, you know, a Mom and Dad to call my own, maybe a little sister." Heero quirked a brow, still waiting, as Duo finally whispered, so softly it was hard to hear, "Love, for a hope of one day bein' in love and havin' that love returned…"
"Me too," Heero said, watching as Duo's head snapped up in surprise. "Because one day I'm going to live happily after, in a land full of peace, with the one I love, as we make a family." Heero grinned as he said, "I think I'd like to have a daughter… a sweet little girl with violet eyes and golden-brown hair."
Duo quickly changed the topic, the warmth of the dolphin spreading from his chest to his toes to his fingertips but chilling his heart. 'Who has the other half…?'
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IMPORTANT NOTE: For those of you that wish it, DUE TO MY SPORADIC postings, I am offering you, the readers, A MAILING LIST to sign up to. When I finally UPDATE, I will SEND OUT AN EMAIL informing those of you that are on the list that I have finally updated. I need you to EMAIL me, telling that you wish to sign up, and whether it's for ORIGINAL FICTION or FANFICTION. I WILL NOT accept those people that ask to be up on it in a review because I can't be sure that email is real. The mailing list will ALSO OFFER the TITLES of those works that I am posting, the COUPLES (if any) that are in it, which FANDOM it is from, and whether it is a SEQUEL to anything.
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Petra: See, I told you you'd want to beat Duo's head with a rock!
Kati: It's not his fault, Heero's just hurt him so many times...
Petra: shrugs Whatever... Anyways, the poem is by Jessica Burnett who is also known as Black Beyond. Go read her stuff. She does absolutely amazing poems and, wow, talk about her fanfiction.
Kati: Also, feel free to visit our site.
Petra: It's not finished.
Kati: Nor will it probably ever be... but... shrug
Petra: For those of you still reading this long, long, long story... Thanks:
LEEMAX: Heero's very sweet in this one. I think that's one of many ways that the boy could turn out. I mean, he has to internalize all of his emotions.
DRAGEN EYES: laugh Yeah... I could see Duo as being drums... and maybe guitars, though it would have to be electric, no way I could picture him playing just a regular guitar. And the singing... swoons laughs Heero... --; I can't picture him singing at all, but sometimes, as a writer, things just pop up, whether you could picture them happening or not and... this was one of them. "It"? laugh Yes, "it" is rather gone! laugh Ah... the goddesses. They've seen a lot, they have to be very everything. And I think sad goes into thta a lot. Months... without updates... --; feels horribly, awfully, insanely bad about the eight months of not updating However, I do have a valid excuse, if you'll just read in the profile-thingy. laugh And thank you for the long review. I read of all it and I wish I could get into reading like you do! laugh Though, yes, it does sound very exhausting. But, y'know, I think it'd be worth it. Anyways, I would love to write some more and make my reply as long as your wonderful, WONDERFUL review, but I figured you'd rather see this posted than a long review so... shrug Again, thanks for the long and insightful review. I love listening to feedback!
"I dream of a day when I can open my eyes, and my dreams won't disappear."
-Rose Marie Ledam
Petra Megami Assari
The Gentle Tiger Goddess
