Surrender

Watching Bella picking at her breakfast the next morning, I frowned at her morose expression. The eggs were long gone, but she seemed to be more interested in mutilating the rest of her meal than she was in eating it. She didn't glance up when I called her name, but she did pause her assault on her food.

"Be patient, love. Please?"

Her lips thrust into a pout, but she didn't answer and resumed stabbing at her pancakes instead.

Pointing at the remains of her meal, I tried to tease her out of her mood. "Are they that terrible?"

"No," she said with a shake of her head. "No, the pancakes are good. Thanks." She shoved a bite into her mouth, but I thought that was more out of an effort to appease me than due to a desire to eat.

I repeated her name.

"What do you want, Edward?" She still refused to look at me, chewing her next bites and swallowing them so fast I doubted she tasted them.

"I want you to be happy."

"I am."

"Liar," I said with a smirk. She stuck her tiny, pink tongue out at me before taking another bite. I couldn't help but laugh; even when it was just a show, her anger amused me.

"Fine. You want me to be happy? That's easy enough to accomplish."

"Are you ready to go home now?"

She met my gaze at last with an expression of shock on her face. "No!"

"Then, as I said, be patient."

Her eyes narrowed as her fork hovered over her plate.

"We can stay as long as you want and leave when you're ready, however long that is. Or we can go home now. Either way, it won't be all that long that we'll be here."

"So? No matter when we go home, you'll just find some new excuse to keep me human."

"No. I've given up on that hope."

"Then what's your point?" She sat her fork on her plate and shoved it away, the food I'd fixed mostly turned into a pile of crumbs rather than eaten. "You know I'm not going to change my mind. Why not just change me now? Get it over with."

"No."

"What are you waiting for?"

"I'm waiting for the time when changing you won't start a war."

She grimaced, but accepted my explanation without arguing.

"Look, the arrangements have already been made. Charlie thinks we'll be going to Dartmouth within days of our return, and the Denalis have a place ready and waiting for us in Alaska. When we rejoin our family in Forks, we can invite Seth over, or Jacob if you'd prefer. Better yet, both of them. Let them see that you are still human, and then we can all move."

"And when we get to Alaska?"

I studied her for a moment. "You know how much I wish you didn't want to be what I am."

"You've already agreed. I've kept my promise." She raised her chin and arched an eyebrow in a clear challenge.

"You have. Beautifully too, I might add."

Bella huffed and rolled her eyes, making me want to laugh again.

"And when we get to Alaska," I sighed, "I will keep my promise. I'll give you whatever you ask of me."

"What if... when we get to Alaska... all I ask is for you to make love to me again?"

"After you're changed..." I chuckled, and my voice turned husky with anticipation. "Believe me, Bella, you'll be the one needing to fend me off."

I expected her to blush and laugh, but instead her eyes turned sad, and her heart rate increased. "Because once I'm changed, it'll be blood I want, and not you?"

I shook my head. "Sweetheart, even newborns don't spend all day hunting. There will be time for us."

"Eventually," she muttered, but nodded and stood. "Guess I'll get dressed."

To my surprise, my beloved Bella and I spent the rest of the week enjoying the island without fighting. Not that she relented in the slightest in her physical attempts at persuasion, but I got better at controlling my reactions to her - at least, as far as what I let her see.

Pretending that she was still as untouchable as she had been before we were married, I ignored the silky nightgowns she took to wearing, helped her apply sun screen without hesitation, and maintained control of myself whenever she wrapped herself around me as we swam or climbed. When she would kiss me, I would return them, enjoying the taste of her lips like I had done the week before, but nothing more.

Trying not to be too obvious about my intentions to wear her out during our days together, I coaxed her into exploring the many reefs that were within easy reach of our island. We saw sea turtles and collected shells from the ocean floor. Spying fins again, we boated toward the pod so that she might enjoy their antics. I took her climbing to the top of the island's small peak, where she had a picnic dinner while we watched the sun set.

I had never spent so much uninterrupted time with Bella before and reveled in having her undivided attention. I cooked for her, pleased to be able to care for her for a change. Although I had made sure to provide many options, Alice's insistence on extra eggs proved fortuitous. Bella had them every morning, and requested them with lunch and dinner, too. At home, she had always seemed to prefer cereal or pastry for breakfast, and I had never seen her prepare eggs for any other meal. The change in her eating habits had me curious, but when I asked, she shrugged and said they just tasted good. Eventually, I decided it was simply the change in location. I didn't always hunt lions, either.

As I lay in bed on our seventh night on the island, I could hear Bella in the bathroom, preparing for bed. Her pulse was unusually erratic, and I wondered at the reason. Inhaling deeply, I smelled a shift in her hormones and gritted my teeth. I had a feeling she was going to try to talk me into risking her life again. Mentally preparing myself for whatever objections she might come up with, I was far from prepared for the direction her attempt ended up taking.

As soon as I saw her, I understood why her pulse was racing. If I'd had a pulse, the sight of her would have sent mine into a sprint. Bella's normally creamy skin was bright red, but though the sight of her swirling blood was inviting, it was what she was wearing that made me react. Catching myself just before my jaw dropped open, I stared at her in awe.

Unlike her previous silky gowns of ivory and cream, this outfit was black, frilly, and lacy. Though her scanty bikinis had actually shown more of her skin, the very fact that this one hid more of her from my gaze made it all the more enticing. She looked shy, sexy, mysterious, and every bit a woman. It took all of my concentration not to give in just at the mere sight of her.

"What do you think?" she asked with an arch to her eyebrows. Not displaying her usual clumsiness, she slowly pirouetted so that I could see her from every angle. My eyes were locked on her body as she deliberately displayed the way the cut of the outfit clung to her curves. Her movement sent the ruffles at the sides flaring out, and the shimmery lace caught and reflected back the dim light in the room. Her cheeks just peeked out of the bottom of the ruffles, and the open back dipped low, exposing the valley of her spine. Turning to face me again, I couldn't stop staring at the way the bodice cupped the breasts that I had once held.

I wanted to tell her that she was the loveliest creature to ever walk the Earth. I wanted to tell her that she was the essence of beauty, the epitome of desire, the only woman that I had ever or would ever want. And I wanted to tell her that I did want her.

I blinked and swallowed hard, incapable of speech. Forcing air from my lungs, I cleared my throat before trying again. "You look beautiful." As if that word could even come close to describing the sight of her. Attempting nonchalance, and not wanting her to see how she affected me, I amended, "You always do."

Bella's lips twisted, not appreciating my forced indifference. "Thanks," she muttered sourly before climbing into the bed beside me.

Carefully, making sure I was in control of every muscle, I wrapped my arms around her, trying to avoid touching the black lace. She pressed her body against mine, and I was grateful for the fact that I was wearing clothes. I didn't think I'd have been able to resist her if I could have felt her lace-covered curves pressed against my skin. She sighed and snuggled against my chest.

"I'll make you a deal."

Knowing what she wanted from me, I pressed my lips together angrily. "I will not make any deals with you."

"You haven't heard what I'm offering." Her voice was almost smug, as if she knew that what she had in mind was certain to be more irresistible to me than she already was.

"It doesn't matter."

"Dang it." She affected a sigh. "And I really wanted..." Trailing off, she shrugged, her body rippling against mine. "Oh well."

Rolling my eyes in amusement at her obvious attempt at persuasion, I stifled a sigh. It had only been a week, and her attempts were steadily growing bolder. The outfit she was wearing was evidence of that! Frustration swept through me. What would she be trying by this time next week?! Not wanting to think about that - or what else my sister might have packed for Bella - I found her words running through my mind instead.

And I really wanted... As though it were something other than sex.

Well... maybe it was. The last time she'd offered a compromise, she had shocked me with both her request and her offers.

How I wished I could see inside her devious, mysterious, maddening mind! How did normal people ever manage to get things done? No wonder so many human couples divorced. Without the unchanging awe that would keep their love fresh and new, I could only imagine that human love would pale under the constant bombardment of uncertainty, fear, and doubt. My love for her would never fade, and I knew by now that her love for me would not, either. Likewise, I doubted my curiosity had any chance of fading.

The little minx. Surely she knew what she was doing in making me think there was something she wanted without giving me any clue as to what it was.

The very idea that there was something which she wanted had my curiosity blazing. Any insight into her mind was tantalizing, and I couldn't resist needing to know what it was. "Alright. What is it you want?"

She didn't answer me for a moment, and I was sure she was well pleased with herself. She did a good job of keeping the smugness out of her tone when she finally spoke. "Well, I was thinking... I know that the whole Dartmouth thing was just supposed to be a cover story, but honestly, one semester of college probably wouldn't kill me. Charlie would get a thrill out of Dartmouth stories, I bet. Sure, it might be embarrassing if I can't keep up with all the brainiacs. Still... eighteen, nineteen. It's really not such a big difference. It's not like I'm going to grow crow's feet in the next year."

Stunned to hear my words repeated back to me, I understood that she was not telling me what she wanted, but was offering me what I wanted, instead.

My words were slow and halting. "You would wait. You would stay human."

For her to lead a human life, she knew that I would do practically anything. Which meant that I had been right about her aims. Just as on the night when she had agreed to marry me, she was offering me everything that I wanted, if only I would make love to her. She had agreed to marry me so that I would make love to her, and now, was offering to remain human for the same goal, despite the fact that the first time had nearly ended in her death! What was the point in her agreeing to remain human when submitting to her request could kill her?

Abruptly furious, I demanded, "Why are you doing this to me? Isn't it hard enough without all of this?"

I grabbed a handful of the frilly lace that covered her creamy skin. As if resisting her didn't already take all of my concentration, she was deliberately making it harder for me. And now, now she even tried to bribe me by offering the one thing she had never before considered. Not for one second had the possibility of staying human been on the table. Didn't she know how much I wanted her, how much I wanted her to live?

Of course she did, I answered myself. She knew me so well, she knew exactly the right buttons to press to get me to agree to what she wanted. If I didn't know already that giving in would kill her, I would have agreed right at that moment, and the lace that was in my hand would have been gone from her body before she could blink.

Realizing that the muscles in my arm were trembling to do just that, I forced my hand to let go. "It doesn't matter. I won't make any deals with you."

"I want to go to college," she insisted.

I scoffed. "No you don't." Trying to make her see why I kept refusing, I insisted, "And there is nothing that is worth risking your life again. That's worth hurting you."

"But I do want to go. Well, it's not college as much as it's that I want - I want to be human a little while longer."

Exasperated, I closed my eyes and sighed heavily. "You are making me insane, Bella. Haven't we had this argument a million times, you always begging to be a vampire without delay?"

"Yes, but... well, I have a reason to be human that I didn't have before."

I'd thought she was merely offering her humanity as a bargaining tool, and was surprised to hear that she had a reason of her own. Warily, I asked, "What's that?"

"Guess." She grinned broadly and pulled herself close to me for a kiss. Wanting to laugh, I knew that I'd already guessed the correct answer. She wanted to stay human so that she could make love with me. She never seemed happier than when she was risking her life!

I returned her kiss, but only in that I didn't push her away. Keeping the image of her bruised body firmly in my mind, I added those that Tanya had shown to me, those that I had seen in the Seattle predator's mind, and those Jacob had imagined. I knew only too well what would happen if I were to make love to her right then.

The most maddening part of her argument was... this wouldn't be an issue at all if she were a vampire. Not that I'd had any experience with sex as a human, but knowing what I did of our nature, I could only imagine that it would be all the better for her once she'd been changed. If she were a vampire, I could make love with her with no fears of hurting her, no worries that I would break or kill her, no need to even break our kisses to breathe or any physical need to rest. If she were a vampire, we could have made love in that cave had we wanted to!

She said she wanted to stay human, but it was not for the same reasons that I wanted her to do so. I loved her smells, her warmth, the way her hormones were reacting to me as I kissed her right then. I could taste them in the very air. But none of those measured up to the real reasons I wanted her not to change.

If she stayed human, there would be no restrictions on her potential. She would be able to keep her father, her mother, would grow old enough to have a career, and to mature past the volatile teenage years - which was something I had never had the chance to do. How many of my problems were due to my very age? How often had I been called 'kid' despite being a hundred years old? She had no idea how much better her life would be if she just lived it!

Carefully, I pushed her away from me, laughing softly. "You are so human, Bella. Ruled by your hormones."

Her mouth twisted and she shook her head angrily. "That's the whole point, Edward. I like this part of being human. I don't want to give it up yet. I don't want to wait through years of being a blood-crazed newborn for some part of this to come back to me."

Though I could tell she was fighting it, her sentence ended in a yawn, and I was pleased that, if nothing else, my plans to tire her were going to put an end to this fight.

"You're tired. Sleep, love." Pulling her against my chest so that she could feel the vibrations, I started to hum her lullaby.

"I wonder why I'm so tired," she muttered sourly. "That couldn't be part of your scheme or anything."

Snickering, I knew that she saw through me, just as she always did.

"For as tired as I've been, you'd think I'd sleep better."

I stopped humming in surprise. "You've been sleeping like the dead, Bella. You haven't said a word in your sleep since we got here. If it weren't for the snoring, I'd worry you were slipping into a coma."

She looked back at me with a frown. "I haven't been tossing?"

I shook my head.

"That's weird. Usually I'm all over the bed when I'm having nightmares. And shouting."

As if she had needed to tell me that. I was well aware of her sleeping habits, but without her sleep talking to eavesdrop on, I'd had no idea what her dreams were about. Now she confessed to having nightmares! "You've been having nightmares?"

"Vivid ones. They make me so tired." She said the last word around a yawn and laid her head back onto my chest, seemingly unconcerned. "I can't believe I haven't been babbling about them all night."

Unable to contain my ever-present curiosity about her, I pressed, "What are they about?"

She shrugged. "Different things - but the same, you know, because of the colors."

"Colors?" Though I had seen into many humans' minds as they dreamed, human mental images were blurry and faded, unlike the clear vivid thoughts of a vampire. None of their dreams had ever seemed all that colorful to me. It had been a century since I had dreamt, but the only things I could really recall about my own dreaming were from the last ones I'd had. They'd been about burning and freezing to death at the same time. There had certainly been no colors involved.

"It's all so bright and real. Usually, when I'm dreaming, I know that I am. With these, I don't know I'm asleep. It makes them scarier."

I hated the thought of anything scaring my sweet human girl, but there had been many things which had done so since I'd met her. Yet each one had been something physical, something I could fight off. How could I protect her from a dream? Hoping she'd tell me at least something useful, I pressed her again, "What is frightening you?"

Bella's body grew cooler and she trembled against me. "Mostly..." She hesitated and I wasn't sure she would be willing to tell me after all. She liked that I couldn't read her mind, and this felt like asking her to allow me to see inside of it.

My curiosity won, and I pressed her to tell me anyway. "Mostly?"

She thought for a moment before whispering, "The Volturi."

My arms wrapped around her in understanding. If I could have dreamt, I was sure I'd have had my fair share of nightmares about the rulers of our world. "They aren't going to bother us anymore. You'll be immortal soon, and they'll have no reason."

I watched her face, looking for some indication that I had reassured her. They were just dreams, after all. Surely they were no reason for her to look so devastated. I imagined she might have the same look if she learned of the death of someone she had loved.

"What can I do to help?"

Bella shook her head and shrugged, the expression clearing from her face. "They're just dreams, Edward."

"Do you want me to sing for you?" I offered, liking the idea that I could protect her sleep. "I'll sing all night if it will keep the bad dreams away."

She nestled closer to me, and when she answered, her words were slightly slurred, her exhaustion taking over. "They're not all bad. Some are nice. So... colorful. Underwater, with the fish and the coral. It all seems like it's really happening - I don't know that I'm dreaming. Maybe this island is the problem. It's really bright here."

I frowned, not liking her referring to Esme's island as a problem. "Do you want to go home?"

To my relief, she shook her head firmly. "No. No, not yet. Can't we stay awhile longer?"

Smiling again, I promised her, "We can stay as long as you want, Bella."

"When does the semester start? I wasn't paying attention before."

Sighing at her persistence, I began to hum her lullaby once more, and within seconds, she was asleep.

The Volturi! How dare they intrude, even into Bella's dreams! We were married now, and Bella would become a vampire soon enough. She had never been a threat to our world, despite Aro's accusations. One of the invitations Alice had sent out had been to him, personally. Surely he knew by now that she was not going to say anything.

I shook my head, reminding myself that that hadn't really been the point. Bella's knowledge of us had merely been a tool which Aro had tried to use to gain my service. I ground my teeth together, hating the ancient fiend. Humans claimed the existence of fantastic things all the time. They believed in many various types of monsters and ghosts, even alien visitors, and while I knew only too well that some of their beliefs were based on reality, I also knew that they had no real proof. If they did, everyone would know of our existence, and the secret wouldn't matter.

No, the point had been an illustration of power and a threat. Aro had let us go because he was patient. He'd lived for three thousand years. What were a few months to him? He had been certain that somehow, he would find a way to bring Alice and myself, and perhaps even Bella into his service. He had also been certain that it would be Bella herself who was the key. Letting us go was like a strategic chess move. Sometimes one had to sacrifice their own queen in order to conquer the other's king.

My arms tightened around Bella. My queen would never be sacrificed! Three thousand years - as long as it seemed - was still only a blink in eternity. We would outlast Aro. Our love would outlast all of the Volturi. And when they were legends that were told to fledgling vampires, Bella and I would live on, wrapped in each other's love.

I kept humming, hoping that the dreams she would have that night would be good ones. She'd also dreamt of the reefs, she'd said, and of colors. Well, Esme's island was very colorful. I ran through many of my favorite songs, missing my piano a bit. My fingers pressed against her skin just lightly. I chuckled to myself, remembering Carlisle comparing making love to Bella with playing the piano.

Ah, the music we had made that night! If only it hadn't ended on such a sour note. If only I could have controlled myself better. Instead, I was as I had always been: a rash, impulsive, unthinking teenager, self-centered, self-absorbed, and arrogant. I had concentrated on what her body had been doing to me, rather than the other way around. It was a miracle I hadn't killed her! Well, no matter. We would have the rest of eternity to be together. I just had to get through the next few weeks. Surely I could be strong enough for that!

My song broke off as Bella's body jerked against mine.

"Bella? Are you alright, sweetheart?"

"Oh," she whispered in a harsh gasp and stopped breathing.

She must have just woken from a nightmare. I watched her face, concerned that talking about them before sleeping had made them worse. She'd been having nightmares that week without waking before. Why did she wake now? She blinked a few times in the dark room before her mouth twisted and tears began to pour from her eyes.

"Bella!"

Her body began to shiver against mine, and the tears increased. I wiped them from her face, hating whatever it was that had caused them. I never wanted to see tears in her beautiful eyes. Her lips trembled, but she didn't answer me.

"What's wrong?"

Finally she took a breath and whispered in an anguished voice, "It was only a dream." Her voice broke over the last word, and she held her body tense, as though fighting not to cry.

I stopped wiping the tears away and pulled her against me, rocking her slightly, just as I had seen parents do to comfort their children after waking from a bad dream. "It's okay, love, you're fine. I'm here. Did you have another nightmare? It wasn't real, it wasn't real."

"Not a nightmare," she corrected me with a shake of her head. Since I was no longer wiping them away, she rubbed her hand across her eyes, but the tears continued to fall. "It was a good dream."

Uncomprehending why a good dream would make her cry, I stared at her. "Then why are you crying?"

"Because I woke up." Her voice turned into a wail as she pressed herself tighter to me, wrapped her arms around my neck, and began to sob in earnest.

Although I was almost amused at the reason behind the tears, her pain-filled cries were far from amusing. I hadn't heard her cry like this since she had told Jacob that she was choosing me. She had spent that night sobbing into my chest as she let that part of her life go. Those tears had caused me pain because I had been to blame yet had rejoiced in the reason for them. These tears, though... how could I fight off a good dream?

"Everything's alright, Bella. Take deep breaths." Unsure of how else to comfort the miserable girl in my arms, I simply held her while she cried.

"It was so real. I wanted it to be real."

"Tell me about it," I prompted her. "Maybe that will help."

"We were on the beach..." She pulled away from me, and I looked into my beloved wife's tear-streaked face. It was tight with pain and a misery that I didn't understand. The beach? What could she have wanted on the beach that would make her act like this? As she stared at me, the tears stopped leaking, but her face still showed her pain.

"And?"

"Oh, Edward..."

I couldn't stand the misery I could see on her face, hear in her voice. It tore at me, but I felt completely useless. If she didn't tell me what was wrong, how could I fix it? "Tell me, Bella."

Her head shook back and forth before she pressed herself to me. Bella's sweet mouth was on mine, her hands locked around my neck, and her muscles strained to pull us closer.

The moment her lips touched mine, I felt myself react. Though we had kissed over the past few days and in the months before our wedding, there was something different about this kiss, and my body responded automatically. Her hormones surged in her system and the scent of them flowed around me. She wasn't trying to convince me to have sex with her, or using her kiss to persuade me. Her body was telling mine in no uncertain terms that it needed mine as I did hers. She was making little pleading noises in the back of her throat, small whimpers of pain that I was only adding to as I tried to push her away from me.

Finally breaking the kiss, I stared into her eyes in astonishment. "No, Bella."

I'd never seen her like this before, and I didn't understand it. Her previous attempts at persuasion had either been shy but deliberate and calculated, or in response to my actions. This almost desperate desire seemed to overwhelm her, and I blinked, surprised. Humans weren't supposed to feel so strongly, were they? Although they were ruled by their bodies, Bella had always been in control of herself. I had always been the dangerous one, the monster on the edge of being controlled by the forces within me.

This Bella wasn't dangerous, but what she wanted was. It was taking everything in me to maintain that control now, especially in the face of the loss of her own. I shook my head, rejecting her as I had done so many times.

She dropped her arms from around my neck at my refusal. Her tears restarted, and my sweet wife lay in my arms, dejected and defeated.

"I'm s-s-s-orry," she stammered. Her breaths hitched a few times, and she stopped breathing, trying to regain control of herself.

Ah, she was apologizing for wanting me? For crying over my rejection? I wanted so desperately to give in to her, but I would hurt her if I did. I pulled her against my chest, struggling with myself.

"I can't, Bella, I can't!"

Against my skin, I could feel her tears flowing, hotter than her skin as they soaked into my shirt. Bella's body shook against mine, and I heard a sound that tore at me. My sweet wife was sobbing, her pain all too evident in her trembling, high-pitched moans.

"Please," she begged me. "Please, Edward?"

I never wanted her to be in pain. But she was in pain. I never wanted to hurt her. But I was hurting her! I was always the source of the pain in her life, and every attempt I made to protect her from me had hurt her. Now I was hurting her yet again.

She had insisted that I hadn't hurt her when I'd made love to her, but that my rejection was hurting her now was plain to see. She was convinced that I could make love to her again without danger. In trying to protect her from what I might do, was I doing more harm than good?

Hadn't I leaned by now that I should trust her?

Something shifted within me. Rejecting Bella was wrong. Hadn't I felt it when we'd made love? I'd known then that loving her was right. Her cries that night had been ones of pleasure and not ones of pain like those she was making now.

Unable to resist her any longer and needing to replace the sound of her misery with cries of pleasure again, I pulled her face up to mine. The lust that I had tried to cage broke free and made itself known. Trying desperately to contain my own fierce need of her, I heard a groan escape me as I pressed my lips to hers.

Bella's response was instant. Sensing my surrender, she gasped with joy. She rose off the pillows and climbed into my arms, wrapping herself around me as I sat upright and shifted her onto my lap. Her hands thrust into my hair, securing my lips against hers as though she was afraid I would still pull away. Her mouth opened, and I pulled the taste of her breath into my lungs.

She settled herself and tucked her legs, pressing the length of her body against mine. She fit perfectly, as though the hand that created her had made her just for me. Trying to avoid bruising her again, and making sure I was in control of every muscle, I wrapped my arms around her and laid my hands against her back.

The feeling of the lace under my hands was fascinating. It moved with each breath she took, and I slid my hands up and down her back, exploring the way the silky material's intricate swirls and patterns felt against Bella's skin. At any other time, I would have enjoyed the way the fabric moved and shifted, but right then, it was in the way. No matter how fascinating or delicate, it couldn't compare to the gossamer skin of the girl in my arms, and I was tired of being separated from her.

Gathering a double handful of the material, I tugged on it, hearing a sharp shredding as it came apart in my hands. Bella seemed oblivious to the fate of her clothes, but her hands tugged my shirt over my head, and our kiss broke only long enough for her to pull it off of me. My shorts met the same fate as her gown, and at last there was nothing separating us anymore.

Bella's body rose against mine, and a sigh of relief escaped us both as she sank back down, merging our bodies together again.

Determined that no matter what else happened, I would not bruise or in any other way hurt her that night, I let my hands simply rest against the small of her back. The control I had practiced that week while resisting her served me as I managed to not dig my fingers into her.

Even so, I was having trouble focusing on keeping my arms loose around her, on not crushing her against me. I wanted to press her tightly to me and to run my hands over her body as I had done the first time, but I didn't think I would be capable of doing so and still keep my wits about me. Firmly, I reminded myself that she was silk and glass, delicate and breakable, where I was marble, too hard and strong for my own good.

I sank back into the pillows and gripped the sheets instead. I didn't care if they were ground to dust by my hands, so long as her skin wasn't damaged. Bella followed me at first, but then sat back upright to slide her hands along my chest and stomach. She closed her eyes and threw her head back, exposing the length of her throat to my gaze. Her chestnut hair cascaded down her back and over her shoulders, rippling and swaying in time with her movements. Unable to look away, grateful that I didn't even need to blink, I watched in awe as my beloved Bella's body floated above my own. She rose and fell in a slow rhythm, and my silent heart swelled with joy at hearing her cries of pleasure once again.

I bent my legs to give myself leverage, and my muscles flexed as I thrust upward to meet her. Of their own accord, my hands reached for her, wanting to touch her, but I was afraid to let myself do so. Abruptly, she grabbed my hands in hers and placed them against her hips. She pressed her hands against the backs of mine, holding me in place. As she was the one applying the pressure, I didn't worry that I was hurting her, and let myself enjoy feeling my Bella make love to me.

Bella was panting fast, and her powerful scent swirled around me when she finally collapsed across my chest. However, I wasn't anywhere close to being finished. Holding her in place, I rolled us over, covering her body with mine. My name was on her lips as she started to move her hips against mine. Overjoyed that she was so willing, I kissed her face and neck, finding my favorite soft spot by her ear just so that I could breathe her name into it. Bella's writhing body sent shivers through mine, and her fingers clutched at my hair as her back arched and her legs wound around me. More than once she had been called my singer, and each sound she made was a song to my ears. I echoed her every note, or perhaps she echoed mine; I wasn't sure.

I tried to focus on two things at once - the joy I felt in her body, and not killing her while I felt it. She was more delicate than a soap bubble, more breakable than a baby bird, and I barely dared to graze my fingers against the silk that covered her glass frame. Trying to avoid bruising or crushing her, I gripped the mattress by her head and felt my fingers punching holes in the flimsy material. I knew that I was right to keep my hands off of her, but, oh, she felt so good around me. Our bodies were entwined, rocking in delicious synchrony, and I added a roll of my hips against hers as I tried to keep my movements slow and gentle.

Why had I ever bothered resisting her? I knew that I could no longer claim to be the more stubborn of the two of us, and I knew also - delighted in the fact - that the next time she asked, I would not tell her no. As often as my Bella wanted me, I was hers, as I had always been. Assuming, of course, that I could make it through this night without killing her.

My hands wanted to feel her skin again, but I felt my restraint slipping and knew that would only result in more bruises. I didn't think I could take seeing that sight again. I remembered my need to bite her that first time and how I had bit something else, anything else. Frantically, I reached out for something to grab ahold of and encountered something that wasn't soft and yielding. Finding myself overwhelmed by the forces within me, I clenched my fists, and what I was touching shattered and splintered in my grasp. Crying out with her release at the same time as I did from mine, Bella went limp beneath me. After a moment, I raised myself up, breathing heavily and terrified - despite feeling her beating heart - that I had killed her.

Bella's melted chocolate eyes met mine with a look of wonder. A smile spread across her face and her arms wound around my neck.

Understanding that I hadn't hurt her, I looked at my hands, confused. From between my fingers protruded bits and pieces of wood. I blinked at them and glanced above Bella's head. Several chunks of headboard were missing, and I realized that I held them in my hands. Relief washed over me and I tossed the broken bits of wood away before sliding my hands carefully beneath her body so that I could hug her.

"I love you," I whispered into her ear, nearly sobbing the words in my relief. Not just relief that I hadn't killed or maimed her, but relief that the tension I had been under from denying my need to make love with her was gone. I repeated the words several times, wishing there were other words, stronger words that could convey my meaning, because those three didn't cover it. She whispered them back to me, stroking the back of my head and kissing my neck.

Carefully, I pulled away from her and rolled to my back. As she had done the first night, she rolled with me, keeping her body pressed against the length of mine. I heard her take one deep breath which she let out in a huge sigh, and then she slept. Feeling more relaxed than I had all week, I closed my eyes and lay with Bella in my arms, grateful for the gift of her love.

As the sun peeked into the room, I lifted my head so that I could study her skin. Although each bruise still looked like an accusation to me, they were all fading and yellow. I saw nothing on her to indicate I had touched her with too much force tonight.

Relief spread through me again, and I smiled ruefully. When would I ever learn to listen to her? Time and again, she had been proven right. I was a fool for ever doubting her. I had let my fears control me, and our first week as a married couple had been spent fighting instead of loving. Well, I would do my best to make up for lost time in the coming weeks. We could stay here for as long as we wanted, and now that I had loved her without bruising her, I thought, maybe next time, I could try to avoid even breaking the furniture. So long as she wasn't hurt though, I didn't care if I tore the entire house down. We could rebuild it again.

Chuckling at the idea of newlywed vampires not breaking furniture, I thought of the house that awaited us in Forks. Though I had known my family was building it, Esme and Alice hadn't wanted me to be a part of it, considering the place their gift to us, though nominally, it would be Bella's. Of course, that was only due to Bella's constant refusal at accepting any gifts. I could still hear Alice's high pitched voice squeaking, "Let's see her refuse this one!"

I found myself thinking of what Bella had offered me earlier that night: to stay human so that I would make love to her. Now I wished that I had taken her up on the offer! How long could I convince her to put off becoming a vampire? The agreement had been simply after we got married. We would be married for eternity. A few years from now was technically 'after we got married.' Perhaps I could convince her that Charlie still needed her in his life, at least long enough to let him see us happily married.

And the longer she stayed human, the longer I got to love her human body. Despite the bright sun streaming into the room, I felt myself shiver at the thought. There was nothing that could compare with feeling Bella's body, warm and pulsing with life, wrapped snugly around my own. For a few minutes, I considered waking her, as I had wanted to do that first morning, but then I remembered that we would have company on this day. Our housekeepers were due within a few hours, and I didn't want to worry about time constraints. Besides, she would need rest and nourishment for what I had planned.

Trying to keep the need I felt for her contained, I tucked my hands under my head to resist the urge to run them over her skin, to cup her curves, to wake her, to make love to her again. Fiercely, I found myself looking forward to changing her. Then, there would be no time spent sleeping, no need to hold back from touching her as we made love, or to keep my motions careful and slow.

Ah, I was such a selfish creature!

I needed something to distract myself. Gazing at Bella's sleeping face, I wondered why she was so silent. She hadn't spoken in her sleep the entire week! I didn't think she had ever gone so long without mumbling nonsensical words from her dreams - at least, not since I had started watching her. Suddenly I found myself wondering what dream had woken her. She'd said it had been a good dream. And why had she woken from it with such an insistent need for me? I hoped she remembered her dream in the morning. Or whenever she ended up waking. It almost wasn't morning anymore.

Finally, Bella's breathing shifted just slightly, and I felt her tense briefly before relaxing against me once more. After a moment of laying silent and still, Bella lifted her head to look at me.

"How much trouble am I in?" she asked in a small voice.

Considering my anger the first morning, and my insistence since then that it was too dangerous, I guessed I shouldn't have been surprised to find that she would think I'd be mad. I felt a little bad for that, as I was anything but mad at her. Annoyed with myself for being such a stubborn fool, yes, but she was never to blame. However, I thought it would be fun to tease her a little.

"Heaps." Turning to look at her, I smirked at her expression. She was biting her lip, a crease of worry between her eyes.

Seeing my amusement, her expression cleared of the worry, and she sighed audibly. "I am sorry. I didn't mean... Well, I don't know exactly what that was last night." As she spoke, her eyes widened and she blinked in confusion.

I shouldn't have been surprised to find her apologizing to me and nearly rolled my eyes. Changing the subject slightly, I indulged my curiosity. "You never did tell me what your dream was about."

Bella's body warmed. "I guess I didn't - but I sort of showed you what it was about." Her laugh was a little high-pitched. She sounded so embarrassed at that admission, but I thought of how she had climbed on top of me and...

"Oh." I blinked in surprise. "Interesting." She'd been dreaming of making love with me. I felt unaccountably pleased with myself, and with her. And here I'd thought her sleep-talking was wonderful!

"It was a very good dream," she admitted shyly.

I wasn't sure what to say. A thousand responses ran through my mind, but none of them seemed worthy of what had happened between us after she'd woken up. Making love to her was better than anything I'd ever imagined. If I could have, I'd have spent my nights dreaming of loving her again, and none of them would ever live up to the reality.

"Am I forgiven?"

She sounded so upset, worried that I was mad at her for giving me the greatest pleasure I'd ever known. Trying to lighten her mood, I teased her again, "I'm thinking about it."

She moved from leaning against my chest so that she was sitting beside me, but before she became fully upright, she fell back against the pillows with a startled expression.

"Whoa... head rush."

Bella's eyes were unfocused and she looked like she might faint. Her face paled and then tinted slightly green. Concerned, I pulled her into my arms. Perhaps I should have woken her.

"You slept for a long time. Twelve hours."

"Twelve?" Bella's eyes widened as she processed that information. She frowned and looked away from my probing gaze. I saw her eyes dart around, before they traveled up and down herself. She breathed deeply and moved her body against me.

I held back a grimace, realizing she was inspecting herself to make sure that I hadn't left any marks this time. "Is the inventory complete?"

She glanced back at me, blushing and nodding. "The pillows all appear to have survived."

Thinking of the mess in the master suite, I was quite glad that I hadn't destroyed these ones, too. "Unfortunately, I can't say the same for your, er, nightgown." Seeing her confusion, I nodded toward the foot of the bed to where I had tossed the scraps of lace after tearing them off her.

Looking like she was fighting a laugh, she said, "That's too bad. I liked that one."

"I did, too," I admitted, abruptly wondering exactly what all else my sister had packed for Bella.

"Were there any other casualties?"

"I'll have to buy Esme a new bed frame," I confessed, looking at the jagged holes I had torn from the thick wood.

"Hmm. You'd think I would have heard that."

I watched her blinking at the holes I'd made, and realized she'd been as oblivious to the fate of the bed as she had been to the pillows and her nightgown. "You seem to be extraordinarily unobservant when your attention is otherwise involved."

"I was a bit absorbed."

To my delight, she blushed a bright red, the scent of her blood just detectable from where it swirled under her translucent skin. Brushing my fingers along the extra warmth, I sighed with just a touch of sadness, knowing her blushes were numbered. "I'm really going to miss that."

I stared back into her eyes, wondering how I would tell what she was feeling or thinking when her body was as silent and unreadable as her mind was. She was so determined that she wanted to be a vampire. Every vision Alice had shown me of that future had been an essentially still picture. I had seen her white skin and red eyes, but she had not smiled, nor given any indication of how she felt. All Alice had shown me - all she had seen - was that it would happen. I wondered if what came after was simply unreadable. Newborns were volatile and difficult to predict beyond what their instincts told them.

Having just been reminded rather forcefully of both how stubborn she was and how she always seemed to be right, I wondered if being a vampire truly would make her happy.

She pulled her lower lip in between her teeth, rolling it back and forth. The crease appeared between her eyebrows. "How are you feeling?"

How was I feeling?! There weren't words to describe how I felt this morning - with the possible exception of relieved. Unable to help myself, I laughed at her. Certainly she had been absorbed, but couldn't she tell how good she had made me feel?

"What?"

"You look so guilty - like you've committed a crime."

"I feel guilty," she admitted.

"So you seduced your all-too-willing husband," I teased, enjoying calling myself her husband. "That's not a capital offense."

Her already red cheeks darkened slightly. "The word seduced implies a certain amount of premeditation."

Considering the way her need had seemed to overwhelm her last night - as it had me - I shrugged. "Maybe that was the wrong word."

Losing their look of worry, her eyes brightened and her lips curved into a smile. "You're not angry?"

Amused by her confusion, I felt a smile on my lips. "I'm not angry."

"Why not?" she demanded.

"Well..." I cocked my head at her for a moment. Did she want me to be? No, I decided. She was merely confused by the way I was acting exactly the opposite of how I'd done so far. But then, that had only been because I'd hurt her, and had been certain that a second time would kill her. I'd rarely been more glad to be wrong.

I explained, "I didn't hurt you, for one thing. It was easier this time, to control myself, to channel the excesses. Maybe because I had a better idea of what to expect." I glanced at the bed frame, grateful that the pillows that had inspired me to grab the wood, rather than Bella's body.

Her lips spread into a delighted smile. "I told you that it was all about practice."

Rolling my eyes at her I told you so, I heard her stomach rumble and laughed at the way her stomach made its needs known this morning just as it had our very first. "Breakfast time for the human?"

She sounded delighted as she said, "Please," and bounced out of the bed. Although I was used to her clumsy nature, I was surprised at the way she seemed to be still recovering from her exertions. Bella staggered, her center of balance - dubious though it already was - seeming to be off. She tilted and looked like she was about to fall right into the dresser.

Before she could contact it, I wrapped my arms around her, steadying her. Staring at her in concern, I asked, "Are you alright?"

Pushing herself upright and shrugging out of my arms, she muttered, "If I don't have a better sense of equilibrium in my next life, I'm demanding a refund."