32. Delegation
"What's going on?" Bella asked.
At the same time, Jacob thought, What is it?
Incoming... at least three, Seth answered.
Did they split up?
Through Jacob's mind, I saw the forest from three different perspectives. Seth's view wasn't moving as he held his position at the place where he had detected the approaching wolves. Jacob's view was of the trees he was sprinting past, as was Leah's. Jacob was pushing himself nearly as fast as he could go, but the speed at which Leah was running made Jacob look like he was strolling.
I blinked in surprise. Leah was fast! I wouldn't have been surprised if she could have kept pace with me. As she ran, she thought, I'm running the line back to Seth at the speed of light. So far, no other point of attack.
Seth, do not challenge them. Wait for me.
"Seth hears some wolves approaching him," I said. "Leah and Jacob are on their way to join him."
Bella inhaled sharply, surely worried there was about to be a violent confrontation between the two packs. "Edward. Do something."
"What would you have me do?"
"Go help them."
"I'm not leaving you."
"They're outnumbered. They'll get hurt. Please, Edward, you have to help them." Seeing me continue to shake my head, she turned to my father. "Carlisle!"
Before he could answer, I said, "Be patient, love. Jacob knows what he's doing. If their aim is to talk, having one of us there wouldn't help matters. If they're coming as an attack party, they aren't doing so in a very strategic manner. They have the ability to move quietly. They aren't hiding their approach, nor are they coming at us from more than one direction - at least, not as far as Leah has been able to detect."
Carlisle and Rosalie exchanged a glance before nodding. For once, we were all in agreement. Seeing that none of us planned on going to stand with the wolves, Bella pressed her lips together in an unhappy line while she glared at me with worry in her eyes.
Hearing the change in the cadence of the approaching wolves' strides, Seth said, They're slowing. Ugh - it's so off not being able to hear them.
I snorted.
"What is it, son?"
"Seth is used to being able to hear the other wolves, but the separate packs can't hear each other. It's rather disconcerting to be so used to hearing minds, and then to suddenly find that you can't." I gave Bella a wry smirk. She didn't seem to appreciate my amusement and wrinkled her nose.
Can you hear the others?
I shook my head again. "Seth is just past the edge of my range. I wouldn't be able to hear him at all if he wasn't connected to Jacob, and the others are farther, still."
"Will you be able to hear any of them once they are all together?"
I shrugged, but didn't answer, concentrating on listening and watching through the three sets of wolf eyes. Everyone was watching me intently, waiting with me to find out whether or not we were under attack.
I think they've stopped.
Waiting for the rest of the pack?
Shh. Feel that?
I closed my eyes, trying to understand the impressions coming from the wolves' minds. They were aware of a subtle change which was beyond my comprehension. I only knew of it because they did, and couldn't have identified it if Jacob hadn't defined the difference for me.
Someone's phasing?
Feels like it.
Leah reached her brother at that point, her speed causing her body to swing around as she halted her forward momentum. The dirt and leaf litter flew up around her as she skidded to a stop before placing herself between Seth and the approaching wolves. Got your back, bro.
They're coming. Slow. Walking.
Almost there. As fast as Jacob was running, still he was unable to reach the speed of Leah's sprint. I was aware of an anxiety in him. He didn't like being separated from his pack. He was their Alpha and should be there to protect them, to stand beside them as they confronted the other pack.
Look who's getting all paternal...
Head in the game, Leah.
Four, Seth abruptly announced. Three wolves, one man.
I was impressed that he was able to distinguish their numbers and their forms based on the sound of their steps and strained to keep in contact with Jacob's mind. A moment later, he burst into the clearing where the other two waited. I found myself pressed against the glass door, trying to get as close to them without leaving the house as was possible. My gift was stretched in their direction as far as I could reach, but I could no longer hear Seth or Leah at all. I could just barely catch Jacob's mind, and his was faint.
It was frustrating, like listening to a radio that wasn't quite tuned into the station, and all that could be heard was the occasional note or word through the static. I caught flashes of what Jacob was seeing, a hint of the rich, earthy smell of the forest, but either he wasn't thinking any words, or I couldn't pick them up.
"Edward, talk to us," Carlisle pressed me.
"Shh!" He'd broken my concentration, and I lost Jacob completely. "Damn it," I muttered and focused on regaining the connection I'd lost. After several seconds of complete silence, I caught a sharp flare of anger and heard Seth's mind as he shouted, Overreaction? And attacking our allies without warning isn't?
Relieved, I said, "They're just talking. But I can't... quite..."
Straining harder, I touched another mind when it, too, burned with anger. ...don't feel comfortable with murder, huh?
I recognized the mental voice as Jacob's and fought to maintain my hold on his thoughts.
An image of a member of Sam's pack swam into focus. He was holding up his hands to placate the snarling wolf in front of him, for Jacob was snarling furiously at the young man who'd been his brother. His anger was making his thoughts and senses easier to catch.
"...going to wait ...decide later if there's a problem with the... thing."
"They're going to wait," I told my family. "They say they're not going to attack unless they decide it's a problem after it's born."
Ha! What a load.
...don't buy it?
...know what they're thinking Jake... Sam's thinking... Bella dying anyway... figure you'll be so mad...
...I'll attack myself. His mind filled with anger again, agreeing with Leah's assessment of Sam's motives.
"Leah thinks that Sam thinks Bella will die when it's born, and Jacob will attack me and the fetus himself. No point in attacking Jacob now when waiting will mean the same end result with no risk to any of the rest of his pack."
...thing kills Bella... be easy to forget how I feel about their family... look like nothing more than bloodsucking leeches all over again... my enemies once more...
...I'll remind you...
...but will I listen?
"Jake?"
...Leah... be sure... talk to him... be positive there isn't... going on while...
...in front of me... naked before... doesn't do much for me...
...protect our backs! Get out of here...
Leah turned away from the group and sprinted through the forest toward our house to run the wide perimeter they'd established as our protected territory. As she got closer, I used her mind to establish a firmer link with Jacob and Seth.
"Where's she going?"
There was a shift in Jacob's senses as he retook human form. Human again, I couldn't hear him through Leah, but I could hear him directly. His human mind was easier for mine to identify with - I couldn't hear the thoughts of normal animals, after all. I didn't have to strain so hard to hear him and was able to track Leah's progress as she ran the wide circle around our house. Relieved that we weren't about to be snuck up on when our attention was diverted elsewhere, I redoubled my attempt to hear Jacob's mind while maintaining contact with hers.
The other wolf in his human form was unfamiliar to me, though I'd heard him along with all the others during the fight with the army. Perhaps I simply didn't know him as well as I knew Jacob, or he was just that much farther away from me so as to be out of my reach. I supposed it didn't matter why I heard one's mind and not the other's, so long as I heard their conversation.
"Oh. Hey, Jake."
"Hey, Jared."
"Thanks for talking to me."
"Yeah."
"We want you to come back, man."
"I don't know if it's that easy, Jared."
Speaking slowly, I related their conversation to my family. "Jacob is in human form and talking to Jared. He's trying to convince Jacob to go back home, but Jacob is refusing. He wants Jacob to let Seth and Leah go home. Jacob told him he's been trying to convince them to do just that from the start. Jacob says things couldn't just go back to normal even if he did go home. Once he took on the position of Alpha, he's stuck that way... It sounds as though, before Jacob left the pack, he and Sam were a lot closer to fighting for leadership than he let on to me earlier. He can't just return to them; there can't be two Alphas in one pack.
"Jared is pointing out that if the reservation isn't his home... then... Jacob doesn't have one. He and Seth and Leah... they're... homeless, with nothing but the clothes on their backs, and Jacob ruined the last of his clothes just now when he took wolf form. So he doesn't even have that much." I frowned, feeling bad for the three wolves who had given up everything to save those who had once been their enemies. "As wolves, they can at least catch their meals, hunting animals just like we do, but Jared says Leah doesn't enjoy eating raw meat.
"Jacob is insisting that Leah is free to choose, as is Seth. He's not willing to take away their freedom like Sam had tried to do when he commanded Jacob and Seth to attack us. Jared is expressing Sam's regret for his actions. Jacob says he isn't angry anymore, but that doesn't change anything. He says he's going to wait, too. He says..." I paused, astonished, before relaying his words once more. "He says Bella isn't the only member of our family that deserves their protection.
"Jared has given up trying to convince Jacob and is trying to convince Seth now, telling him that his mother is heart-broken at losing both of her children so soon after the death of their father. Of course that made Seth unhappy, but Jacob's calling that a bluff, telling him that they've only been gone one day, and Sue is hardly dying of loneliness with Jacob's dad and the tribe's elders for company. Jacob assured Seth that he could leave if he wanted, but Seth refused.
"Leah's back from circling our house." I shared Jacob's admiration for her speed. Under other circumstances, I might even have challenged her to a race. Whenever I raced against my family, I always had to assume some sort of handicap to make it fair - giving them a head start, or obliging myself to run in an awkward crouch, for instance. The wolf girl's speed would have made a race with her an even competition, which was something I hadn't had since Emmett's newborn days.
"She didn't find any trace of the wolf pack, so we're safe here for now. They weren't trying to trick us. Jared's trying to convince Leah to go home, now. He says she has no ties to us." Jacob's ties to my family were obvious in his relationship with Bella, and they all knew that Seth and I were friends, but Leah had never failed to express her disgust toward us, which was something that I could tell still existed now. I had to admit that, despite trusting Jacob's judgement, having a protector who hated me was unnerving.
...ties to them, but I will protect and support my brother... Jacob gives me a freedom and equality I never had as Sam's pathetic ex-girlfriend... don't tell me where my loyalties lie!
Her actions made a sudden sense to me. I'd seen her misery when the pack had watched my family training to fight the newborn army, and knew that they had not treated her as an equal. Sam had hesitated to spar with her, believing her to need protecting, rather than seeing her as a protector. Of course, in treating her as weak, he made her weaker by denying her the same benefits of fight training that the others had. They may not have been friends, but Jacob was more than willing to give her an even share of the obligations he and Seth felt to keep my family safe, and she was grateful.
"Huh."
"What?" Bella whispered.
I shook my head, not willing to go into details about my insights into the wolf girl's motives when I needed to concentrate on the conversation at hand.
"Jared is pleading with her for Sam, even resorting to using Sam's old terms of endearment to beg her to return to their pack. Although, that effort seems to have backfired." I snorted at the inventive and rather vulgar ways in which she was telling him off. Though she was in wolf-form, she seemed to get her meaning across quite clearly, and Seth - who could hear her words - was eyeing her in open admiration.
"Jacob is telling them that his pack and Sam's are all still family, but until the... until it is born, Sam's pack should keep away from us to avoid any unwanted fighting. Jared agrees that none of them want to fight the other. Jacob says when... after... we'll leave, and Seth and Leah can return to the reservation. Jacob will..."
I hesitated, not wanting to tell Bella that Jacob planned on turning wolf full time and running away again, as he had done before our wedding. She would hurt for her friend when she needed to concentrate on conserving her limited strength.
"They've left. Jacob doesn't believe that there will be an attack, but since he can't hear their minds, he's still worried and sending Seth and Leah to patrol again. He's on his way back."
My mouth twisted as I saw their reaction to Jacob's memory of Bella drinking blood. It was a testament to our friendship that when his surprise wore off, Seth was able to see it from our point of view. As he said, we were vampires. What else would a vampire baby drink?
Glancing around the room, I was surprised to see the rest of my family had joined us in the living room. I'd been concentrating so hard on the packs that I hadn't even heard them come in, nor had I heard them rearranging the furniture. Our living room was back to normal, and Bella was wrapped in several thick blankets on the couch.
I almost smiled, seeing her health returning so quickly. She was clutching the white cup again, which had been refilled during my distraction.
"Edward, what will Jacob do?" Bella demanded in a low voice.
"He's coming back to sleep outside, like he was planning earlier," I said, deliberately misunderstanding her.
"That's not what I meant. You said Seth and Leah will go back to the reservation, but you didn't say what Jacob would do."
I sighed. I should have known she would never let that go. Reminding myself - again - not to lie to her, I said, "He had already been planning on going wolf once he found out whether or not I'd killed you on our honeymoon. Whatever else happens after it's born, he's not going to want to hang around with a bunch of vampires."
"He's going to disappear again."
"It's his choice, Bella. He never wanted to see you like us," I reminded her quietly. "And if you don't survive, he'll have even less reason to want to stay."
Her mouth twisted down as she chewed on her lip, but she didn't question me further.
"Edward, I'm concerned about something," Esme said with a frown.
I saw her remember watching me stand by the door with my eyes closed and a look of concentration on my face. I heard my voice in her memory as I described the wolves' homelessness. She glanced past me to the ground just off the porch where the shredded remains of Jacob's shorts were fluttering in the grass.
"What do you suggest, Esme? Their situation is temporary; Bella's pregnancy won't last much longer. You can't build them a home in time even if they would use it."
They could use ours.
"You're forgetting how we smell to them. Staying here wouldn't be an improvement to sleeping outside."
She put her hands on her hips, giving me her stern mom look. ...being difficult on purpose.
"I am not!"
They may prefer to sleep outside, but Jacob can't want to walk around naked.
"Well, that's true enough. I suppose Alice could order some clothes for him, but..."
"With all the clothes we have here already?"
Exasperated by her persistence, I pointed out, "I don't have anything that would fit him."
"Mine might," Emmett offered.
Esme beamed at my brother. "Go pick something out for him please, Emmett. Even if he refuses, we will at least have tried."
A few seconds later, Emmett returned, carrying some folded clothes which he placed on the porch where Jacob would be sure to see them upon his return.
...not attacking, we should raise the shutters. The sun would be good for Bella.
I nodded at my mother. "Yes, Esme, please do."
Alice, Jasper, and Emmett returned to Carlisle's library to continue their research, and also to get away from the smell of blood which was permeating the living room. Although capable of resisting the scent, Emmett couldn't deny the burn searing his throat. Jasper was maintaining control only because he refused to breath or even look in Bella's direction. It was easier for both of them to just stay away.
By the time Jacob trotted back into our yard, our house had returned to normal. The wide glass walls were letting in the morning light, and Bella was no longer laying on the hospital bed, though Carlisle insisted on continuing to give her glucose through the IV.
Everything's cool, Jacob thought to me. I watched as he investigated the clothes Emmett had left for him before taking them into the woods to change. He seemed to be glad for something to wear, even if they smelled bad and didn't quite fit.
Rose turned on the television so that we could pretend to have something to do besides watch Bella and took up her position by Bella's head, sitting on the floor where she could quickly provide the bowl for Bella to get sick into should she feel the need again.
Unlike with all of the food she had eaten since our return, Bella didn't look as though she was fighting to keep the blood down. Instead, her color was returning to her skin, the sparkle had come back to her lovely brown eyes, and her smile as she looked at me held real warmth.
She held out her hand to me and invited, "Sit with me?"
"You need to get warm. I won't exactly help you with that."
"I'm almost too hot under all these blankets."
"Alright then," I said with a pleased smile and sat beside her to pull her blanketed feet into my lap. "But tell me if you get uncomfortable, either way."
Smiling back at me, she sighed and leaned back into the couch cushions as she took another long drink from the cup she held.
Once the metal shutters had returned to their hidden homes, Carlisle pulled Esme over to one of the wide windows with a look of concern on his face. They spoke in low murmurs, so that Bella shouldn't have been able to tell they were even talking, much less to hear what they were saying, but of course I could.
"Esme, I am only asking you to reconsider what this means."
"I have. It means Bella's chances are better than ever."
"For lasting until the fetus is ready to be born, perhaps. But what I want you to think about is not what it means for Bella, but for the child."
"I don't see how anything has changed."
"On the contrary, my dear. This is confirmation that what she is carrying is more vampire than human."
"So are we."
"And so were the immortal children I once knew."
"You've made this argument already, Carlisle. Bella is not going to give up her baby just because our laws dictate that it shouldn't exist."
"No, dearest, that is not what I mean. Do you see how quickly she is going through the supply of blood I brought home? What are we going to feed it when it is born?"
"You can get more. People make donations every day."
"Those are meant to save human lives, Esme! Not to feed a vampire child."
"So the lives of strangers mean more to you than your own family?"
He sighed and shook his head. "Of course not. But the supply is not endless. There is a stockpile, but once that is gone, keeping this child alive could cost the lives of many innocents. Even if it never feeds from a human directly, robbing them of something that could save their lives means we would be indirectly harming those in need. Add to that the fact that we are immortal, and I would have to think the child would be, too. That means potentially millions of lives lost due to this one vampire child's thirst."
"That's absurd. When he's old enough, we'll teach him to drink animals, just as we do."
"We have no guarantee that it can be taught! The children in Volterra could not."
"That's just a bridge we will have to cross when we come to it."
"Esme..."
"No. Listen to me, Carlisle, please. I know you're worried, and I can't lie to you. We all are. But until we know for certain that Bella's child is what you fear, can we not hope for the best?"
"I do. I always have. Every day of my long life."
"Then hope with me Carlisle. Our family has been incomplete for so long. Once Edward found Bella, I thought it couldn't get any better than all of us together. The only thing missing is what I lost, what Rose has never had, and what Alice has never known how to miss."
"You are living vicariously through her, my dear, and that is a very dangerous thing. You are already attached to it to the point where you and Rose were willing to let Bella and Edward die for it."
"That's not fair, Carlisle!"
"No. It is not. It is not fair to him, nor to me. Have you thought of what will happen to us if we lose our son again?"
"Of course," she whispered. "He already threatened to kill himself should Bella not survive."
"How can you accept his death so easily?"
"I'm not. No, wait, just hear me out, alright? You see how attached Bella is to her baby. Do you recall how you found me?"
"Yes, but - "
"She is willing to sacrifice her life for her child's. Do you think she would hesitate to follow it if we kill it?"
"Well... I... No, but - "
"Do you think she would ever get over us killing her child?"
She waited for him to speak, and when he didn't, she pressed, "The only way I can save our family is by doing what little I can to make absolutely certain her child lives. Carlisle, I don't care what it takes, or what some strangers may have to go through should their needs for blood not be met. I care about you, and Edward, and Bella, and their child. I care about Rosalie and Emmett and Alice and Jasper. I care about our family, and if our family is to survive this, it's only going to happen as a whole."
After a moment, Carlisle sighed. "Ah, dearest. Has anyone ever told you what an amazing woman you are?"
She laughed low in her throat. "Yes. You. Every day."
It had been easier to be angry with Rosalie for being selfish, even when I knew there was more to it than that. It was hard to maintain my anger toward my mother when her actions were done with the intention of protecting us all.
...not to be able to just go home and grab another pair of sweatpants when I need them... homeless thing again... don't have anyplace to go back to... don't own anything which will probably be annoying soon, even if it doesn't bother me too much right now... know I'm here... should I still knock? Whatever ...goin' in.
I tried not to smile when Jacob strolled in. Seeing him in my brother's clothes was strange; it made him seem like a part of our family. I knew Bella thought of him as such already and tried to imagine a vampire having a werewolf for a brother. It seemed an impossibility, and yet, why not? We weren't that different, not really. Had Bella chosen him, yet still wanted me in her life, I would have been pleased to have been considered his brother.
I saw Bella's face in Jacob's mind and looked back to see her expression for myself. When she met his eyes, and her whole face lit up. My warm, brotherly feelings for Jacob disappeared as I saw the love on her face for him. There was nothing sisterly about her expression.
What I found odd was that Jacob agreed with me.
What is with her? She's married for crying out loud! Happily married, and in love with her vampire past the boundaries of sanity. Plus she's hugely pregnant with his spawn, too. Why's she got to be so damn thrilled to see me? It's like I made her whole freakin' day just by walkin' through the door. Almost wish she didn't care. More than that, that she really didn't want me around. Then it'd be easier to stay away...
"They just wanted to talk. No attack on the horizon," he reported in a low mutter.
"Yes. I heard most of it."
"How?" We'd been a good three miles out!
"I'm hearing you more clearly - it's a matter of familiarity and concentration," I explained. "Also, your thoughts are slightly easier to pick up when you're in your human form. So I caught most of what passed out there."
"Oh." It seemed to bother him that I'd heard, but he struggled not to say something obnoxious. Finally, he shrugged and said, "Good. I hate repeating myself."
"I'd tell you to go get some sleep," Bella teased, "but my guess is that you're going to pass out on the floor in about six seconds, so there's probably no point."
He glanced at the cup she held. ...much blood is it gonna take to keep her alive? ...some point they're gonna have to start trotting in the neighbors.
I didn't bother to tell him that my family shared his concern. What was important at that moment was that Bella was no longer minutes away from dying. Remembering Esme's determination to keep Bella and her fetus alive at all costs, I wouldn't have been surprised if - should it become necessary - she would steel into the houses in Forks with the intention of taking the inhabitant's blood. As Jacob turned to go back outside, I almost snickered at the idea of my mother behaving in such a traditional vampire manner. Of course, she wouldn't be the one to drink it, and the unwilling donor would survive her visit, but it was strange, nonetheless.
He turned and headed for the front door, mumbling, "One Mississippi... two Mississippi..."
Seeing Jacob in the clothes Emmett had once worn, I caught an irrational surge of anger from Rosalie. Despite my brother's height, Jacob towered over everyone in my family, and the pants hit him mid-calf.
"Where's the flood, mutt?" Rosalie taunted him.
"You know how you drown a blonde, Rosalie? Glue a mirror to the bottom of a pool," he fired back without pausing or turning. This time, I couldn't help but to snicker.
"I've already heard that one," Rose shouted. As he shut the door behind himself, she muttered, "Jerk," and shot me a sour look.
Maybe I shouldn't have encouraged him, but it was nice to see someone else who was willing to verbally spar with her.
Edward! Will you please offer him more than Emmett's ill-fitting cast-offs? Esme thought firmly to me. I rolled my eyes, but agreed with her and slipped out from under Bella's cocooned feet.
"Where are you going?"
"There was something I forgot to say to him."
"Let Jacob sleep - it can wait."
Yes, he agreed with her. Please let Jacob sleep.
"It will only take a moment," I insisted as I strode out of the front door. He turned and eyed me with a weary expression that I could have understood without needing to read his mind.
"Jeez, what now?" he asked crossly.
"I'm sorry," I muttered, knowing how long it had been since he'd slept. He'd been ready to pass out before Seth had sounded the alarm, and talking to Jared had been difficult for him. Yet, if I told him what I wanted to say, perhaps he would sleep easier.
When I hesitated, trying to decide how to phrase it without seeming condescending or pitying, he prompted me, What's on your mind, mind reader?
"When you were talking to Sam's delegates earlier, I was giving a play-by-play for Carlisle and Esme and the rest. They were concerned - "
He cut me off with a dismissive wave of his hand. "Look, we're not dropping our guard. You don't have to believe Sam like we do. We're keeping our eyes open regardless."
"No, no, Jacob. Not about that. We trust your judgement. Rather, Esme was troubled by the hardships this is putting your pack through. She asked me to speak to you privately about it," I explained.
He blinked at me a few times in surprise before repeating, "Hardships?"
"The homeless part, particularly. She's very upset that you are all so... bereft."
He snorted as though it was no big deal to him. ...vampire mother hen... bizarre... "We're tough. Tell her not to worry."
"She'd still like to do what she can. I got the impression that Leah prefers not to eat in her wolf form?"
"And?" he drawled.
"Well, we do have normal human food here, Jacob. Keeping up appearances, and, of course, for Bella. Leah is welcome to anything she'd like. All of you are."
"I'll pass that along."
Seth would be happy to eat with Bella, and Jacob wouldn't have any problem doing so, either. It was the wolf girl I was more concerned with, and who I thought would be more difficult. "Leah hates us."
"So?"
"So try to pass it along in such a way as to make her consider it, if you don't mind."
He eyed me for a moment before nodding. "I'll do what I can."
"And then there's the matter of clothes."
His eyes flickered over the shirt he'd already started to remove and the pants that didn't quite fit. "Oh yeah. Thanks." ...probably not polite to mention how bad they reek...
I felt my lips twitching. I couldn't imagine trying to wear his clothes. Being forced to smell his stench all day every day? I thought I might prefer to go naked.
"Well, we're easily able to help out with any needs there. Alice rarely allows us to wear the same thing twice. We've got piles of brand-new clothes that are destined for Goodwill, and I'd imagine that Leah is fairly close to Esme's size..."
"Not sure how she'll feel about bloodsucker castoffs. She's not as practical as I am."
"I trust that you can present the offer in the best possible light. As well as the offer for any other physical object you might need, or transportation, or anything else at all. And showers, too, since you prefer to sleep outdoors. Please..." I hesitated as I remembered how very much I owed to the wolf in front of me. I almost reached out to grip his arm to add emphasis to my words, but settled for speaking as fervently as I could. "Don't consider yourselves without the benefits of a home."
"That's, er, nice of you. Tell Esme we appreciate the, uh, thought. But the perimeter cuts through the river in a few places, so we stay pretty clean, thanks."
"If you would pass the offer on, regardless," I insisted.
"Sure, sure."
I almost smiled, hearing the phrase Bella often said coming from his mouth. I wondered who had picked it up from whom. "Thank you."
Jacob turned his back to me, and I knew that he was more than ready to catch up on all the sleep he'd been missing. Before I could take a step back toward my house, I heard a sound that chilled my already cold skin even farther: my Bella cried out in pain. The wolf forgotten, I sprinted back to her side to find her curled into a ball and grimacing with the pain she was in. Rosalie was beside her and holding her carefully as she sat completely still, biting her lip and trying to hold back her whimpers.
I wanted to take her from my sister and pull her into my arms, but I didn't dare touch her. I didn't know what was wrong and feared I would made matters worse by moving her. The cause of Bella's pain became clear to me as the minds of my three family members who were in the room with us recalled hearing a sharp, sickening snap at the same time as they saw Bella's body jerk.
Ah, God, no... I stared at her in horror. It wasn't bad enough that I had to watch it bruise her, but now it was breaking her bones!
"Bella, let me see," Carlisle said, reaching for her.
"Give me a second, Carlisle," she panted.
"Bella, I heard something crack. I need to take a look."
"Pretty sure... it was a rib. Ow. Yep. Right here," she said around her short, shallow breaths. Carefully, she pointed to her left side, but didn't actually touch the spot that was hurting.
"I need to take an X-ray. There might be splinters. We don't want it to puncture anything."
"Okay," Bella agreed to my relief.
Rosalie pulled Bella carefully onto her lap, and then stood with her. I saw my glare in her mind, but she had already been holding her, and if I tried to take the fragile girl from her, I would only make matters worse. Still, I didn't bother to stop my growl when she insisted, "I've already got her."
...Bella's stronger, but now so is the thing... can't starve one without starving the other, and healing works the same way... there's just no way to win...
I couldn't argue with Jacob's assessment, but didn't take the time to even glance at him as Carlisle and I followed Rosalie upstairs.
A few minutes later, he was studying the images for shards or splinters. The sac which protected the fetus was a huge white blur, but Bella's rib cage was clearly visible, as was the line where it had apparently kicked her hard enough to cause the rib to crack. Thankfully, it seemed like a clean break, and only one rib was affected... for now. The fetus had only been provided with the blood which it so obviously needed for an hour. Already it had begun to grow again, and the increase in its strength was appalling.
"Your rib is cracked," he told Bella, "but there are no splinters; it's a clean break. You haven't punctured anything."
"Yet," I amended.
Carlisle said my name in disapproval. ...no need to make this harder on her.
Furious and terrified, I snarled, "It's breaking your bones now. It's crushing you from the inside out. Carlisle, tell her what you told me." He hesitated, and I stressed, "Tell her."
He walked over to stand beside her. I could see the sorrow in his eyes as he met hers, but he hesitated to say the words.
"Tell me, Carlisle. It's alright."
"The fetus is not compatible with your body. It is too strong. You are fighting each other and, Bella, I am afraid that you are losing this battle. It is starving you by the hour, and nothing I have given you is helping."
"But, I've kept the blood you've been giving me down. And I'm hungry. If I can start eating again, I'll be fine, right?"
He glanced at me and I nodded, grimly encouraging him to tell her what she needed to hear. "Bella, it has already broken one bone. I doubt this will be the last, and the next one could do real damage."
She shook her head as stubborn as always. "I'll be fine. I've broken bones before."
"You may be able to ignore the pain the breaks cause you, but I cannot ignore the danger they represent. The next one could puncture your lungs or your heart."
She shook her head. "You're still worried about what could happen, what might happen. But I know what will happen: if you take him now, his death is guaranteed. I'm sorry, Carlisle. The answer is still no."
"There is more to it than that. Your body is working too hard, trying to sustain you without adequate nutrition and trying to sustain it at the same time. The blood has made your heart stronger, but it is still struggling to keep up with the demands the fetus is placing on it. We can all hear it faltering. At this rate, I assure you, it will give out before you can deliver."
She swallowed hard and nodded, acknowledging his words. "Then I'll hold on as long as I can and then - "
Bella believes you can save her when her heart fails, keep her from dying...
He reached out to place a hand on her shoulder to reinforce his next words. "Bella, there are some conditions that even venom cannot overcome. You understand?"
She pressed her lips together, but nodded slowly.
"I am sorry."
As Carlisle walked away, I could feel Rosalie staring at me defiantly, but I only had eyes for Bella. She'd been convinced she would survive. Even with Carlisle essentially telling her that there was nothing that could save her now, I didn't dare to hope she would change her mind.
"Edward, I'm sorry." She shook her head and caressed her swollen stomach, confirming what I already knew: her resolve had not faltered.
I had already threatened my mother with my suicide and had told Carlisle that I didn't plan on surviving Bella's death. That didn't mean I wanted to die; I didn't! Especially not now that I'd had a taste of what eternity with her could mean. Although she knew I had tried to kill myself once before, I wasn't sure she believed that I still would, but there was no way I would be able to stand the pain of losing her.
Deliberately, I said, "I can't live without you."
"You won't. You're gonna have a part of me. He'll need you."
"Do you honestly think that I could love it, or even tolerate it if it kills you?" I stared out the window and spoke through my teeth, trying to hold back my fury at her stubbornness. I'd been trying to convince her to end the pregnancy from the start, had even tried forcefully removing it from her! How could she think I would be willing to care for it?
"It's not his fault! I mean, you have to accept what is."
Livid, I turned back to glare at her. Rose was so determined that I not make Bella's choices for her, but what of mine? Since I had found out her plans, I had pleaded with her, cajoled her, and tried to reason with her. I had screamed in anger at my sister and fought against my brothers, but had yet to express my anger toward Bella for the situation she was placing us in. Despite my temper, in all the time I had known her, I had only rarely raised my voice to her, but I did so now, and she jumped and flinched away from me in reaction.
"Because you've given me no choice! Bella, we're supposed to be partners, remember? But you decided this on your own. You've decided to leave me."
"Don't see it that way!"
"Well I have no other way to see it. Because it's me who'll lose you. And I don't choose that. I don't choose that," I repeated in a harsh whisper and left the room, slamming the door closed as I went.
