I need more free time. I need more me time.


Chapter 15


If you can believe it, Annabeth got drunker that night.

It wasn't hard with the amount of drinks floating around in sparkling crystal glasses and carried with love on silver platters. Every once in a while a waiter would silently and gracefully offer her another elegant glass brimmed with dark liquors.

What was hard was avoiding Jason and keeping a presentable appearance in front of Octavian. She wanted to be drunk, she didn't want to act like it though. One misstep, one screw up and her life would most likely plummet like a dying comet as it screamed to earth. Her life depended on how she conducted herself this evening. Her mother wasn't in a forgiving mood as of lately.

(Although, at the end of the night in a somewhat oxymoronic way, she thought she had done a pretty damn good job at keeping presentable l if she did say so herself.)

She did have a few minor slip ups that could of drastically changed the course of her life. Like when her hand moved on its own to slap Octavian whenever he began to get too touchy feely, or the fact that she almost broke down at least seven times when she thought of Piper, or how curses were more easily brought to her lips and harder to disway.

Thankfully, she was able to stifle the curses and steer her hand to fix her hair or rub her neck. Keeping the tears bottled appeared to be more of a challenge, but as always Annabeth overcame it.

Still, she couldn't stop thinking about Piper. How she would talk about Jason for hours, how she was so excited for that date, and how she was so convinced he was the purest thing in this world.

Piper's going to hate me. Rung over and over in her head like the heavy toll of a bell. She's going to be so upset when she finds out… if she finds out.

The whole silent ride home, she felt hollow and guilt ridden. It was this awful mix of alcohol and self loathing that meddled with her gut so much that she couldn't think straight. She just stared at the leather seats and hated the perfection of the limo.

When she finally stood in front of her house, the windows dark and deep shadows etching lines in the structure, she didn't feel relieved. She wasn't happy to be home. It was unsettling almost.

From behind her the limo pulled away as silent as death. The lights of the street glinting off its ebony polished surface before it disappeared into the night. A equally black car sitting at the end of the street, waiting for her still. Who knows how far he followed her this evening.

Or how much he saw.

Annabeth gripped the gift bag harder until her fingertips pinched. She could feel the contents of carefully wrapped delicacies shift as she slightly staggered forward. Giving herself a few biting pats on the cheek to try and sober up a bit. She was almost there, the breezy night helped in snapping her back into things.

She fumbled twice with the door but once she was inside, she left it unlocked and marched directly across the shadow creeping house to the back door and strolled into the backyard. Only stopping once to grab her worn down pair of converses. She was a bit clumsy in closing the backdoor, forgetting momentarily that her mother and Malcolm were asleep upstairs, so it let out a decent bang before she could stop it.

Like a frightened deer she bounded over the yard, then fit the package of food in her teeth, hiked up her skirt and clambered over the fence and on to her neighbors property shedding her heels in the process.

Henceforth, she promptly stole her neighbors white and blue bike and somehow managed to get the converses onto her feet. Cursing so hard a sailor would blush Annabeth pumped the bicycle into action. Somewhere in the back of her mind reminding herself to at least and try to hide from prying traffic cameras that could betray her to the government.

Before she knew it she was in the woods, standing breathless and wild eyed in front of Percy's tree. The moonlight slanting between the bark rippled trunks and softly hitting the floor in loose patches.

I'll just leave this right here. She thought timidly while placing the bag at the knotted base of the roots. Already backing up slowly to leave, making sure she didn't make a sound. A few dry leaves crunching lightly under her feet but she doubted it would alert him of her presence.

Suddenly a magnificent whoosh sent gusts of air to her back and momentarily lifted the skirt of her dress. Startled, Annabeth wheeled around with her grey eyes wide fell backwards against the thick trunk of the tree. Her eyes locking onto Percy as he stood there with his wings unfolded and heaving silently from effort. In the moonlight he looked threatening, and almost wild. His vivid green eyes were piercing and demanding beneath his furrowed eyebrows and almost seemed to glow. It gave Annabeth shivers as a blush rose to her cheeks. The ungodly shame writhing around her gut again at kissing Jason.

"Don't. Do. That. Again." Percy growled darkly. His chiseled jaw clenched as he forced the words out through his teeth.

"Do what?" Annabeth breathed. Her lungs feeling tight as her wings fluttered lightly against the rough bark.

Did he see? Did he see me kiss Jason?

"You said you could be arrested and then you didn't show up! I've been searching for hours, You-"

"Wait, you've been flying?" It was Annabeth's turn for her eyebrows to knit. A bubble of anger starting to grow in her chest as she took two miffed steps towards him. "Your back is far from healed! You're only slowing the process-"

Percy solidly marched towards her tensely and she stumbled back into the tree again. This time pinned by his overwhelming presence and sharp gaze. His wings still spread and so black they looked like torn pieces of the night sky.

She could feel the warmth of his hand hovering next to her arm as if he were scared to touch her. Or perhaps he didn't dare try to hold her still out of general respect. Either way, he didn't set a finger on her.

For a moment, they just stared at each other. Percy was rigid and resembled a challenged wolf all over again while Annabeth was having a hard time keeping her heart from pumping out of her chest as she searched Percy's face. A million questions in her eyes as she looked up to him.

Then he seemed to snap away from his tight emotions in a single second. His eyes falling from their knots of anger as a gentle breath of relief past through his parted lips. The meaning in his gaze turning to something like solace and tender worry. Flicking over her face softly as his wound-up shoulders fell. His hovering hand moving up as if he were about to cup her cheek and then pausing when he caught himself.

She could tell he was thinking about their kiss when his gaze accidently slipped to her lips and his emerald pools turned a bit doleful.

The shame twisted another kink into her gut.

"Don't do that again," he repeated in an almost defeated way. An element of rawness emanating throughout his tone."You can't tell me you could be arrested and then disappear… you just… you just can't."

His eyes roamed over face again in an almost painfully delicate way. So close that they shared a warmth that made Annabeth's wings tremble. She fisted her hands as she fought the butterflies.

"I thought they got you," he croaked as his eyes fell. "I couldn't bear the thought of you getting caught because you were trying to help me… if they got you… I… I…"

He didn't have to say it. It was written in his eyes, and in his stance. The way he just looked at her so ardently with the pain of his worried filled day spoke of sentiments Annabeth was only beginning to believe in. He wanted to come closer, he wanted to hold her but he kept his little stretch of distance. He knew she didn't feel the same way.

She thought she didn't at least. But now…

She stepped forward, into him, and let her forehead fall to his sturdy shoulder. Her arms winding around his neck gently as her heart throbbed. For the first time accepting his feelings, and admitting to herself that they were real. He was real.

He cared.

"I'm sorry," she whispered into his shoulder. The warmth of his torso radiating throughout hers as she felt his arms hesitantly enclose around her back. His powerful heartbeat drummed by her chest in what seemed to be a quickened pace. "I promise that I will never do it again."

Percy sighed in relief, and for a moment his grip on her tightened as if he were scared she could be taken. He hummed however a moment later a semi-satisfied semi-sad; "Good."

A second later she felt his wings curl around them. The familiar way the seemed to block out the world and enclose them made her fizzle warmly a bit.

Protective. Annabeth realized as she caught a glimpse of the glossy black feathers layering his wings from her peripheral vision. Remembering how he coned his wings around her when she first talked about her mother, and again when she fell asleep next to him.

He's being protective. The thought made her burn slightly as a blush fired its way up her neck and onto her cheeks.

"I brought you food," Annabeth coughed while gently breaking away from the hug. Turning to retrieve the bag while she felt his gaze still locked to her figure. The glow on her cheeks stubbornly refusing to fade. "It's a few delicacies leftover from Octavian's awful party I had to attend. I suggest you eat them now lest they spoil."

"Sounds good," he replied simply. Gently passing her to start working his way up the tree while plucking the bag from her grasp.

Annabeth followed. Keeping her eyes firmly on the branches infront of her.

In the tree house, Percy didn't seem to feel like lighting the fire so they sat by the opening with the bag tacked back and watched the moonlit forest sway under subtle breezes as Percy ate.

Annabeth pulled her skirt over her knees as they stayed in a comfortable silence. Her thoughts rolling the night over and over.

Her mother's harsh words and disappointment, the punishments, the party, the stuck up guests and the pain of trying to retain a perfect appearance. The kiss. The stupid wonderful kiss that for a moment made her feel… well it made her feel like she wasn't alone. Jason was like her, Jason knew her pains, and he was nice and caring and so understanding. Just talking to him for a few minutes made her happy. Or maybe it was all just the booze? Maybe it was all just in her head?

But Piper. That voice cried out. Piper was so excited. She was so ready. I have to tell her.

(No shutup I don't have to tell her.)

But she's my best friend-

(Shutup, she won't be anymore if I tell her.)

Annabeth stared into the trees and nibbled on her lip anxiously. A few tears pooling into her eyes as she imagined how Piper would take it, how she would react.

"You… you okay?" Percy craned his neck over to her as he tried to reach her eyes. An offer of comfort in his voice so tempting that she had to stare hard into her lap. Tracing each delicately printed flower on her dress with her eyes.

"Fine," she mumbled while her lower lip trembled. She bit it hard before tasting the sting of blood. Squeezing her eyes shut so she wouldn't have to see Percy's face, so she wouldn't start crying because of his sympathetic tone.

His hand tentatively brushed hers as if he were thinking of grabbing it and holding it tight. But again he didn't touch her, he was leaving her space. It was as if he was so painfully aware about personal space now. Ever since they kissed…

Annabeth sighed shakily and laced her hands together. The shame and guilt rolling around her stomach again and again as if that was all that existed in her.

"You're lying," Percy muttered plainly. "Is it your mother?"

"No," she lied.

But a bit of it's about her. Her mind sympathized.

(Shut Up)

"Is it about Octavian?"

"No," she lied again.

He's awful, he's the one who makes me feel trapped. He's-

(Shut Up)

She was getting better at this. At stopping the thoughts that made her crumble.

All I'm doing is bottling them up. I need to talk, I need someone who-

(Shut Up, shut up, shut up.)

"Then what is it?" Percy sounded so concerned it made her heart bleed. "Was… was it something I did?"

Annabeth's eyes snapped open and she looked at him in shock. For a second she sat there open mouthed. "No!"

"Then what?" he seemed to plead. His eyes searching hers so earnestly she had to look away. Letting her eyes fall to the silver lined trees under the moons soft hued light. She may or may not have been glowering.

"I kissed someone."

It came out before she could put a cork into it. The words she loathed now out in the open and hanging over her head like the sharpened blade of a guillotine. The silence icing over almost as quickly as the phrase was spoken. Percy's eyes suddenly clinging to her as if he were looking for the joke in her words.

Her heart squeezed when his green pools fell quietly to the floor.

"Oh." was all he said.

It was desperately lacking in… well, in anything.

She expected him to be upset, or sad, or angry. (She wished he was angry. She wished he would yell at her.) But no, he was silent and totally devoid. It was the worst possible thing he could be. It felt like she just hollowed him out with a spoon and now she was sitting there trying to make conversation with a shell.

"I… I didn't mean to," she whimpered in a breath. Subconsciously wringing her hands as all the shame and guilt that had been worming through her body seemed to intensify. Her heart cramping at how this night had gone. How she made this night go.

Stupid, stupid, stupid.

Percy's eyebrows furrowed. "You… didn't want to kiss… whoever?"

Annabeth shook her head miserably before she froze. A million different emotions swarming her gut as she desperately tried to land on an answer. All she ended up doing was confusing herself, if possible, even more and bringing more frustrated tears into her already big watery eyes.

"Did… Do you like him?" Percy asked warily. That wildly flighty look in his eyes again. His dark locks spilling over his forehead in his constant messy bedhead look.

Annabeth rubbed the tears away with the back of her hand. Fighting off the thick hiccups that threatened to suffocate her while she stared heavily at the bound log floor.

"I don't know," she sniffled while drawing her knees up to her chest. Burying her face into the fabric of her dress as she tried not to cry.

It was timid, but she felt his massive wing slide behind her, and curl around ever her shoulders ever so delicately. The gentle brush of his feathers tickled her bare arms but set a warm ember in her gut.

"I'm not sure about anything anymore," she mumbled while staring glumly at her knees. "This guy… he's supposed to go on a date with Piper next Tuesday. That's the way I've come to know him is through Piper and… She's going to completely loathe me! I got drunk, and idiotic and just acted like a… like a moronically egotistical dictator."

She couldn't help the tears that spilled over when she finally seemed to crack. They burned like acid and lined her cheeks in glittering streams. Her vision morphed and swam until the world turned blurry while her shoulders shuddered brokenly with each heaving breath.

All the while she fought the breakdown. Crying wasn't something her mother would permit in front of anyone. Crying was a form of weakness in her mother's eyes.

And yet how many times have I cried this week alone? Pathetic. No wonder she's disappointed in me.

The first and only time she cried in front of Percy it was because they could've died in a fire she was the main cause of. He was practically delirious and half asleep so it didn't really count. This counted. And it hurt that she couldn't keep it under wraps. That her hard worked for mask didn't seem to work around Percy. That she was disappointing her mother just by breaking down.

She couldn't even look at him as she cried. She just hugged her knees and let go.

A few times she could feel his wing press closer into her back, or hug closely to her own wings, but for the most part he just let her cry, and she thankful for that.

"I- I just wish I never kiss-kissed him. I… I'm so… so naive," She burbled when the sobs had settled down a tad.

"You're not," Percy scoffed. His lips tipping down slightly out of sympathy as he met her gaze. His eyes the most burning pair of earnest green. Hard truth echoing throughout them before they turned slightly sad. "If you like this guy… nothing should hold you back from that."

That only made Annabeth bubble over more with hatred for herself. How could she do this to Percy? Talk about how she kissed Jason and might have feelings for him when he's already shown how he felt towards her? How cruel could she get?

I'm awful…

"Look at me. Talking about all… all of this to you," she sobbed incoherently. "When you- you've already made your own feelings in regards to me quite clear. I just keep screwing up. Hurting everyone around me-"

"I thought you said 'my feelings' were all in my head," Percy chuckled softly at her in such a way that she felt a little less guilty.

"You- you should know that I-I always lie to myself in situations s-such as that." She waved off easily through the hiccups while trying to wipe away the tears again. The flow finally seeming to end as Piper's face flamed up behind her closed eyelids for a final time.

"You have a funny way of saying you were wrong." Percy deadpanned with a hint of a smirk in his voice.

That got her to crack at least smile as she exhaled. Sniffling a few odd times before rubbing her groggy head. Feeling nothing short of miserable. For a moment being tempted to fall into Percy again. Yearning for the comfort he gave in his hugs.

She'd only be hurting him, or leading him on, or both.

"Still…" Annabeth started lowly while shaking her head. "I shouldn't be talking to you about this… I'm… I'm sorry that-"

"Do you like him?" Percy persisted with the question. Turning dead serious in two seconds in a way that made Annabeth's heart plummet. His searching eyes not letting her look away for a second.

So green…

The breeze picked up outside. Whistling over the treetops and pushing dark clouds though the moon filled night like sails through the sea. A sliver of air catching in Percy's hair and ruffling his dark locks in quick fluid movements.

Maybe it was the way he was looking at her, or how the light was falling, or maybe even the subject at hand but Annabeth found herself a little starstruck.

And then she immediately wondered if perhaps she was still a bit drunk.

"Perhaps." She still wavered on a solid answer. Finally lifting her head a bit "Jason is so similar to me. I could've been grabbing onto loose straws with just that but he has a demanding Father and I have a demanding Mother. We see situations in the same light… I don't know. I guess I just felt connected to him."

"His dad is like your mom?"

"Yes."

"And he's okay with that, like you are?"

"Yes."

Percy made a sour face. His eyes hitting the floor as if he just thought of something unspeakable.

"What?"

He shrugged and turned away, only tugging at Annabeth's natural curiousness while her heart skittered with growing dread.

"What?" She repeated as her eyebrows pinched down. That bubble of dread seeming to grow in her gut like a cancer.

"If I say anything, it'll just come off as jealous." Percy muttered while drumming a tune out onto his knee. His eyes still downcast.

"Just tell me," Annabeth shook her head defeatedly. "Honestly Percy, I'm the only person you can speak to so there's really no reason to hold anything back from me. You can say anything you want to me."

Percy's eyes lifted to her face again. He studied her features while seeming to digest her short yet sharp response. The moonlight making his skin look ghostly but his contemplative expression was alive with emotion.

"If this Jason is exactly like you, then you'd slowly destroy each other," Percy muttered seriously in one breath. His heart stopping eyes goring into her again as he laid out each word with care.

Annabeth's nose wrinkled as she was about to protest.

"You're not happy." Percy said so plainly, so bluntly but with such truth that it actually stung. "I'm guessing this Jason guy isn't either if his Dad is exactly like your Mom. Two wrongs don't always make a right. You two would constantly reassure each other that your parents know best even though it's obviously your parents who are the problem."

Annabeth felt a flare of defensive instinct fly up at her Mother being so obtusely attacked. Her mother being the problem? Sure, Athena was a bit overbearing and strict at times but that wasn't a problem. She'd done her best to raise Annabeth, she put all her work into Annabeth.

"She's not the problem," Annabeth defied a little coolly.

"Then what is?" Percy challenged while shaking his head almost sadly. "You're not happy. What's the problem?"

Octavian. Was her first fiery thought.

But I was unhappy before Octavian. Plus I only have to see Octavian because of Mother-

(Shut up, shut up, shut up.)

Losing contact with Piper because of Mother-

(Shut up, shut up, shutup)

My University Education always being at stake because of-

(Shut up)

"I'm the problem." Annabeth breathed. No one else to blame. It had to be herself. "I'm the problem."

Percy hushed her. His wing pressing closer into her back. "Not true," he whispered.

"You have no idea."

"If you were the problem, couldn't you have fixed it?"

"I've tried." Annabeth scowled. "I've tried so hard but…"

"But you've never been good enough for your Mother." Percy finished without waiting for another heartbeat. The hard look in his eyes rang with an absoluteness Annabeth found a bit daunting. Her mind skipping around for answers or explanations. Anything that could argue against everything he's said.

"I have to go." Annabeth got to her feet and brushed off her skirt. "It's almost two a.m. I should get back."

He let her leave. His eyes never parting from her form. Although he looked like he wanted to protest.

But he let her go.

-{:oOo:}-

Percy's words haunted her. Especially the next morning when she was promptly ripped out of bed at five a.m. Her mother announcing she had ten minutes to get ready before her tutor would arrive. Didn't help that she had a pretty piercing hangover from last night's excursions and got to sleep at roughly 3 a.m.

Her mother knew she got to bed late. Maybe not as late as Annabeth let it on to be, but still her mother knew. Now she was downstairs with the hateful woman she had to call 'Madame' as a child. The woman was a pursed face high nosed beady eyed creature, who walked with the stiffness of a giraffe and was adorned in only the most expensive blouses and pencil skirts.

Annabeth winced when she felt the thwack of the stick against her spine, the stack of books on her head wavering ever so slightly as she fluidly moved with the song.

"Sloppy." Madame spat. "No wonder I had to return and whip you into shape. It's a wonder you're put up with at the Aresto's at all."

Annabeth released a shaky breath. Her eyes prickling again as the sharp words seem to stick to her like knives. She swallowed it down nonetheless.

"Apologies Madame," she said as even toned as she could.

"Am I listening to a crow or a lady? Come child you're almost eighteen! This is a disgrace!"

It was Saturday. She was to do this all day.

"Spine straight!"

"Yes Madam."

-{:oOo:}-

Piper called at one. Thank the heavens her phone was on silent or else her tutor would of snapped it in half. Her head hurt from exhaustion and her fingers were raw from practicing the harp and piano over and over and over again. She barely had time to excuse herself to go to the washroom before she could answer the phone. Jason wheeling through her mind like a thorn tumbling through her veins.

She didn't hesitate to answer though. She would never hesitate to answer Piper.

"Pipes," Annabeth gasped in relief.

"You were followed and you didn't think to tell me!?" Piper's high and panicked tone was like a breath of fresh air. Anything was better than the descending voice and hard eyes of 'Madame'.

"How did you know?" she whispered as she pressed her back to the bathroom door and sunk slowly to the floor. Her legs burned from proper dance movements and poise. Her knees were just about ready to pop off, but the cold tile of the floor felt refreshing.

"It was published on the daily news website. There's even an astounding picture-"

"I know Pipes, I'm the one who took the photo." Annabeth breathed. She could hear Madame sulking around the living room as she prepped for the next exercise.

If mother sees… what will she do to me?

"People are going mad over this Beth. Some are claiming its all a hoax, but there are thousands of people out there claiming that the same thing happened to them when they went searching for answers!"

"Pipes-"

"You've started something revolutionary. There's even been a poorly orchestrated protest in front of a police station in Wembertin."

"Piper-"
"What?"

"Is it only on the website?" Annabeth asked breathily. Fear hopping around her stomach as she warily let her eyes wander around the grey bathroom.

"Yes. But it's been shared at least a million times." Piper answered dubiously. "Why? And why are you whispering?"

"I've been forbidden to be associated with you." Annabeth's heart clenched. "Mother was so infuriated by the paper she almost executed me."

"Oh my." Piper's voice fell. "How… medieval of her."

"Precisely," Annabeth hissed seriously. "She has half a mind to pull me from University too."

Piper gasped over the line so loudly Annabeth had to momentarily hold the phone away from her ear.

"She can't," the girl growled. "How dare she try and butcher your education."

"I'm not in such horrendous trouble yet, but I may be if I'm caught on the phone with you," Annabeth whispered. Rubbing her head as more throbs of exhaustion weakened her muscles.

"Say no more," Piper reassured. "This is Private Mclean signing out. Good day to you General."

I kissed Jason.

The words were on her tongue, ready to emerge into the open. Ready to be delivered to the one they would hurt most. She had to tell her. She couldn't keep secrets such as these.

"Good day Private," Was all that came out in a dismal utter.

The phone buzzing out before her secret could be lifted from her shoulders. Annabeth was left staring at the screen with the guilt still worming its way through her veins.

I kissed Jason… I made a move on your crush… I might like him too… I'm… I'm sorry.

-{:oOo:}-

"Teach me how to fly."

Percy had been waiting for her to say something. He'd taken the food she'd given him and sat in total silence was she desperately tried to stay awake. Her deliriously groggy mind was replaying the day he caught her and whipped into the sky.

It was another somewhat muggy night, so a fire would've made the tree house unbearably hot. Instead, Percy had again opted to sit by the shabby opening and look over the forest while he ate which gave Annabeth the time to watch the dark sluggish clouds rimmed with silver.

"What?" Percy asked oh-so-elegantly.

"Fly," Annabeth replied somewhat dreamily. "It's the whole reason I came back in the first place. Was it not?"

"... I guess," Percy agreed a bit hesitantly.

Annabeth rose to her feet softly. She was unsteady and wobbly with weariness but she still barely managed to stay on her little ledge. The risk of falling seeming to mount as she looked down through the thick branches and got a good taste at how dizzyingly high she was. But the sky looked so tempting and full of freedom that it made her chest ache. She wanted to fly so badly in that moment. She wanted to fly away from all of her troubles.

The breeze caressing her wings, the gentle night air in her lungs; she might as well of been dreaming.

She felt his hesitant hands land on her waist a moment later and protectively draw her away from the dangerous drop. A kernel of fear in his body language has he released a tight breath.

"Not yet," he chuckled nervously. "You're not exactly flight ready yet."

"Teach me," it was a quiet demand now. Her yearn to fly pressing her to look at him with a decided determination.

Percy's lips disappeared in a purse. His green eyes meeting hers head on with the same strength. A melting lost look swimming in his green pools.

"You wouldn't believe me," he shook his head sadly. "It's so… far fetched. So… unlogical. You're a logical person. You wouldn't understand."

"How am I supposed to learn to fly if you won't help me?" Annabeth's lips twitched down. She wasn't accusing him, she was still asking him.

Please.

"I believe in you," he uttered after a long pause. A final tone in his voice and an odd glimmering light in his eyes.

Then he just smiled, as if he just gave away his biggest secret.