69. Uninvited

Like ripping off a band-aid, or so I'd heard, some things were better done quickly. If Bella had to leave, it was better that she leave without delay, that her return would be that much sooner. All other considerations aside, I wanted this trip behind her simply because I wanted this separation behind us. I missed her already, and we had not even bought the plane tickets yet. Bella left it to me and Carlisle to refine their plans, satisfied that with Alice guiding us, we couldn't go wrong.

I wasn't going to leave anything to chance if I could help it, but once Bella was within Volterra, no matter how or when she arrived, her futures became impossible to follow. There were too many threads, to many variables over which none of us had any control.

But Bella would come home. And Carlisle. They would return more or less unscathed by their visit with the demons who had haunted Bella's nightmares. They would be haunting mine, were I capable of dreaming.

I didn't like it.

Not one bit.

If it weren't for the solid image of Bella in my arms at the airport, obviously having just returned, I wouldn't be letting her go at all. I would have found a way to bring about the future Alice didn't see, to make it happen regardless of what Alice saw, and taken my whole family and run. We wouldn't be in danger if we couldn't be found.

Never mind that I, better than anyone, knew how difficult it was to change the future. If Alice didn't see us leaving, it was a pretty safe bet that we were staying.

However, there were a few complicating factors that had never been involved in her visions before. The constant presence of Nessie and the werewolves meant there were things she couldn't see, though they did happen. Perhaps Alice didn't see our family traveling because she couldn't see Renesmee, who would be with us.

But Nessie's presence alone didn't seem to be enough of an explanation. We wouldn't all be together all the time. There would be times when she was with one group of our family - or left in Jacob's care - while the others looked for information or peoples who could help us.

In fact, leaving Nessie even briefly with the wolf should have solved the issue, fully disclosing that time in our future to my sister's psychic abilities. Alice should have seen Carlisle as he tracked down the vampires he knew in Rio, Esme as she bantered with and reassured our housekeepers or hired new ones if they couldn't be convinced to return, and especially Jasper, easing or enhancing the fears of the tribes-folk we would visit, whichever she saw working in our favor.

Alice saw none of it. Nothing. Merely us, here, engaging in the small routines of our daily lives. Or what little she could see of them.

Jacob, then. This was his fault!

I doubted Leah would be willing to let him go off on a trip around the world with us, without her. And if she came, Seth would insist on accompanying us. At that point, they might as well bring the whole damn pack! Quil would be the exception. His attachment to young Claire would keep him here, if nothing else did.

Renesmee plus three or four werewolves tagging along? How could Alice see any possibilities? No wonder she didn't see us going anywhere. She barely saw us here!

Alice saw Bella and Carlisle traveling alone, because they were alone. She even saw a visit from Irina, though it wavered as if the vampire in question kept changing her mind. She saw the stock market and the weather, worldly things neither the wolves nor Nessie could directly affect.

Just like the wolves had blinded her when I'd left, so they were blinding her now, when we all should be leaving!

Another issue with him and his pack tagging along was the simple logistics of traveling with such a large, conspicuous group. We always brought stares, whether out singly or as a family. No matter how normal we dressed and acted, our vampire-enhanced beauty made us stand out from the crowds of bland humans. The wolves were larger than normal humans, noticeably taller and heavily muscled. We were supposed to blend in with the humans. Even one wolf added to our numbers would not help with that endeavor, much less four of them.

Something told me Bella would not be open to the idea of leaving Jacob here. Then again, she so rarely did as I expected, perhaps she would insist that he resume living his life. He was still so young, despite appearances. His werewolf genes had artificially aged him so that he looked older than I did, though he was younger than Bella. Regardless of how he looked, he had high school to finish, and surely had entertained plans for a career and college that had been interrupted enough by our presence in his life.

It was even our fault that he changed into a werewolf at all, if his people's beliefs about us were accurate, and I had no reason to doubt them.

His wasn't the only life we had interrupted. If he stayed, then Seth, Leah, and Embry would have no reason to come. They, too, had school and lives to return to. The idea of leaving Seth behind upset me, as much as it would have if it were Jasper or Emmett I was considering abandoning. It surprised me how much I would miss Seth's sunny disposition and open friendliness. I could do without his sister's glowers, but even those had eased lately.

Perhaps if we took a slower method of travel and caravaned across the country, then we could all travel together. It would give me an excuse to gift Seth with a car of his own. Still, we would be exposing our large, unconventional group - complete with a fleet of flashy cars - to an unacceptably large number of humans. And then, driving south presented a whole other set of problems.

No, when we went, we would have to fly. Maybe we should just buy a private jet. Or perhaps a large yacht. It wouldn't be the first time we resorted to the open ocean to avoid the dangers of the ongoing vampire wars. Thinking of Bella's reaction to such an extravagance made me chuckle. But if it was for Nessie's protection, I doubted she would protest too strongly.

No matter how Carlisle and I discussed these options, the unlikely and obvious solutions, the circuitous and straightforward routes, Alice didn't see it. We weren't going, regardless of the methods of travel, or the companions we traveled with, or who we left behind. We weren't leaving! Only Bella and Carlisle were going anywhere.

It occurred to me that, as with Bella's decision to visit the Volturi prompting Alice to finally see something, it would take Bella deciding to leave Jacob behind before Alice could see us going. Even a firm decision from her to not leave him could have the desired affect. It wasn't so much that I wanted him to stay as that I wanted us to go. Whatever she decided, I would support.

Until something changed, further planning seemed pointless. I'd already given up on the computer and had any relevant books in Carlisle's library memorized. If I felt like it, I could read along with one of the others, but I had better things to pay attention to.

Cuddling on the couch, angling us so that I could see and touch as much of her as was possible and retain some semblance of propriety in front of my family, I gave in to the need to simply enjoy Bella's presence while it was mine to enjoy. We had finally purchased her and Carlisle's plane tickets, and it would only be a few days before they left. We would have eternity together when they got back, but every second between now and when they were to leave felt as precious as her mortal seconds had been to me.

With Renesmee entranced by Jacob's ability to turn a chunk of otherwise unremarkable wood into a miniature animal - outdoors, where the shavings would not get all over the carpeting - I decided now was the time for the conversation I'd been unintentionally putting off. It was too easy to be distracted by the curl of Bella's ear, the delicious scent of her neck, which I could now enjoy without fighting my nature, the hollow at the base of her throat that begged me to fill it with kisses, the swell of her breasts and the way the thin shirt clung to them, outlining them so clearly.

Bella's legs were draped over mine, the book she was reading propped up in her lap, one hand occupied with turning pages, leaving the other free to absently fiddle with my ring. I'd never before given much thought to wearing a wedding ring, aside from what it would signify, and had not anticipated the pleasure it gave me for her to play with it. She didn't seem to be aware she was doing it, but I loved the unconscious reminder that I was hers.

One unexpected benefit to Bella becoming a vampire was the end of her dependence on clothing to protect her from the weather. As a human here in Forks, she would never have been comfortable in the shorts she now wore nor the spaghetti strap shirt that left so much of her skin bare. I had only seen her dress so scantily when we were alone on our honeymoon. With Bella's impending departure, it was all I could do to keep my hands to myself. It was no wonder I had such trouble keeping my thoughts on the subject I needed to discuss when I was free to explore the unbelievably smooth skin of her inner thigh.

How did skin I'd always thought of as stone feel softer than velvet? What magic did she possess that could transmute granite and marble into satin and silk?

That first day in our meadow, I'd felt indecently exposed just showing the skin of my arms and chest in a short sleeve, button down shirt. Bella had no such qualms. An irrational flare of jealousy shot through me as I thought how these were the types of clothes she would have worn in Phoenix. All those human boys would have seen the causal exposures of her legs and arms every day while she sat or walked among them, oblivious to her affect on them. Was she as oblivious to her affect on me? She seemed to be, but I could never be sure. One thing I did know: Bella wanted me to find her attractive, and oh, did I!

I needed to concentrate on the matter at hand before I found my hand creeping inappropriately far up her bare thigh. We weren't alone. I really shouldn't even have my hand between her legs as it was.

"Bella," I began. My voice sounded odd to my ears, rough with desire.

"Hmm?"

Clearing my throat, I tried again. "Bella."

"Yes?" She met my eyes with a smile curving the corners of her lips up.

"Will you do something for me?"

Her eyes widened ingeniously as her smile broadened. "Right now?"

Abruptly, I was sure she knew what she was doing in wearing the clothes she wore and playing with my ring as she had been. I had to fight the urge to scoop her into my arms and sprint to our cottage - or my bedroom, which was much closer. My family had never cared if anyone else was home; why should I?

Focus, Edward, I sternly reminded myself. We would be together again soon, if not soon enough. For now, we were parents with responsibilities.

"The sooner, the better," I muttered, then squared my shoulders. "I need you to make a decision regarding Jacob."

All the suggestiveness cleared from her expression. She no longer scowled at the mention of his name, but her amber-colored eyes turned wary. The gold flecks within them darkened just slightly. "What about him?"

"I don't think he should come with us when we leave Forks." Her eyes widened when I said this. Her eyebrows - fine, thin lines arching like distant clouds above the setting sun - rose with surprise, but she didn't immediately object, so I said, "He still has school to finish, and Billy still relies on him to drive him where he needs to go. Who knows how long we'll be gone? A year or two? Longer? He has a life here, as does the rest of his pack. And, I think he should stay here at least long enough to finish school. But I also think that's a decision that you need to make."

She chewed on her lip while staring in his direction. We could hear Renesmee's high-pitched giggles and the lower murmur of his voice, but the two were absorbed in their activity, and I had purposely kept mine below the level they would be able to hear.

Bella shook her head. "I don't think he'll find school as important as Renesmee."

"It's for her sake that I suggest this. If it's in her best interests, he'll agree."

Bella's eyes returned to mine, curious, always questioning.

"Alice can't see him," I explained. "I - I think he's getting in the way. He can always join us later, but we need to go, and we can't know where to start if Alice is blinded by him and his pack."

"You do know the rest of the world gets by just fine without knowing the future, right? People make life decisions all the time without knowing how they'll turn out in advance. Why don't we just… pick a place and go? You wanted to go back to Isle Esme, didn't you? So, let's go."

Before I could even look in her direction, Alice was already denying, "We're not going to Brazil, Bella."

"Or anywhere else, for that matter," I growled. And then, pointedly catching Bella's gaze again, I said, "Not as long as Jacob is in the picture."

Bella rolled her lips between her teeth, frowning thoughtfully.

"Renesmee doesn't have time to waste. She needs every advantage we can provide, and Alice's visions could shave many months off avenues that will prove useless to pursue. If she could see them. Nessie presents enough of a barrier to her gift. Add in Jacob and whichever members of his pack decide to tag along, too… We need to leave, love. Which means, he needs to commit to staying."

"And if he won't?" Bella freed her hand from mine to pass it across her now-flat stomach. I wondered if she was remembering the way it had felt, rounded and full with our daughter. "If he can't leave her now any more than he could leave me, before?"

"I'll leave that decision in your hands. But you need to make one. Either one. He stays or he comes. It's up to you to decide."

"You want him to stay, though."

It wasn't a question. And she was right, for many reasons, some easier to define than others. However, all of my planning had come to naught. I felt it was important for her to make this choice, and to make it without undue influence on my part.

I stared hard into her eyes, willing her to believe me, to believe in me, as she always had before. Modulating my voice so it was as gentle as possible, I said, "I want us to go. Whether he comes or not is ultimately irrelevant so long as a choice is made that results in our departure."

Bella nodded, apparently agreeing to make a choice at least, even if I wasn't sure which way she would decide. A moment later, Nessie skipped into the living room, cradling the carving Jacob had made.

Daddy, look what Jacob did! Nessie held the miniature deer up, as proud as if it were her own creation. I offered an appropriate and heartfelt compliment, making sure to direct it toward him as well, since he had followed her inside. It truly was quite nice. He'd made use of the grain of the wood to add the impression of fur. Its proportions were as accurate as if one had stood in front of him for a model while he carved. I could almost expect it to come to life and prance around on her open palm.

Seeing the intention in Nessie's thoughts, I snagged the book from Bella's lap and laid it aside. Nessie climbed up to sit with us and touch Bella's face so she could replay the entire process, occasionally glancing over her shoulder at me to make sure I was watching too.

"Bella, you should show Nessie the wolf Jacob made for you," I said when she had finished.

When Jacob had initially gifted Bella with the bracelet and handmade charm, I hadn't been as gracious about the quality of the miniature wolf carving, given its symbolism, but the deer showed his undeniable skill. Whatever my previous opinion of the little wolf charm had been, I was sure Nessie would like to see it.

"Yeah," Bella agreed, rewarding my suggestion with a smile full of love, but then a look of confusion crossed her face and she stared at her wrist with a frown. She hadn't worn the bracelet since our wedding. I guessed she was trying to remember where she'd left it.

Unaware of Bella's confusion, Renesmee nodded enthusiastically, eager to see more of Jacob's artwork.

Leaning around her computer screen to cast a critical eye over Bella, Alice announced, "If you're gonna take Nessie hunting, you should change into something a little more appropriate for the snow."

I would have thought Bella and Jacob would be used to my sister's enigmatic pronouncements, but they both eyed her with some surprise. Alice shrugged unconcernedly and returned her attention to the touchscreen that displayed her latest fashion project.

"It's good practice. Never know who you'll run into," Alice said from behind the screen. "And your jewelry is hanging from the tree on the dresser."

Apparently, along with what was left of my mother's collection. I hadn't noticed the little jewelry stand in the overstuffed, ridiculously oversized closet. Either Alice or Esme must have raided my bedroom for more than just clothes when stocking our cottage. I didn't mind at all. If Bella or Nessie were to take a fancy to any of Elizabeth's jewels, they were more than welcome to them.

Bella already wore Elizabeth's engagement ring, and her heart-shaped diamond pendant dangled opposite of the very wolf carving Nessie wanted to see. I rather thought my human mother would have wanted her granddaughter to wear something of hers as well. The necklaces would not be too overlarge, though the rings would be.

It was coming up on her lunchtime, and now that Alice had mentioned hunting, Nessie was aware of the gnawing in her stomach and the dry ache in her throat. She was torn between the desire to see Bella's wolf carving right away, and satisfying her abruptly demanding thirst.

Thirsty or not, Nessie was none too keen on the prospect of hunting. The hunt itself was fun, but compared to humans, animal blood was flavorless at best. She worried that if she protested too strongly, she was likely to be offered human food, rather than human blood, a fate best avoided.

The desire to see more of Jacob's art outweighed her thirst for the moment, and there was a convenient supply of human blood stashed in the cottage's kitchen, ready and waiting. Perhaps, while they were there, she could convince them to allow her to indulge herself. Sure there was a supply here, but she felt she was more likely to wheedle one out of Jacob than Carlisle or myself.

Nessie hopped down from Bella's lap and danced across the room to take Jacob's hand and tug him toward our little home. Bella gave me a kiss that was quick yet still filled with warmth, and joined the two as they reached the riverbank. I was glad she planned on changing. Even if Jacob no longer looked at her the same way, those shorts accentuated the sway of her hips in a way that made me want to follow her, and my presence would not help her talk to him.

As they disappeared amid the shelter of the trees, I shook my head, feeling a combination of indulgence toward Nessie's preference for human blood and disturbed by her continuing resistance to giving it up. Alice seemed certain they would be going hunting, regardless of what Nessie might contrive to avoid it.

How frustrating was the spottiness of her visions! Why was it that I caught glimpses of Bella in a clearing, surrounded by lightly falling snow, during however brief a time that she was separated from Jacob and Nessie, yet the same could not be said of our coming trip around the world?

Well, that was sure to change soon!

Once Bella convinced Jacob that his temporary absence from Renesmee's life was in her best interests, the future would blossom for Alice again. With a renewed level of excitement, I joined Carlisle in examining the maps that detailed the Amazon jungles, keeping close watch on Alice's thoughts.

I wished Alice were less absorbed in her project and more concerned with combing the future. I knew she couldn't force her visions, but she could be looking, couldn't she? Making the effort to see? She had done so plenty of times before.

Instead, there she sat, fingers tracing the image on the touchscreen, undoing and redoing and making minor adjustments in the details of the cuts and trappings of a silly dress, seeing only how each change would affect the overall end result when she eventually got around to having Rosalie model it for her. How could she see the future I needed her to look at when she was busy watching the future of fashion unfold? Ugh!

I'm distracting myself, she mentally grumbled when she saw me about to interrupt her. "You could benefit from doing the same."

"Sure, sure," I muttered back.

I can't see the forest when I've been too busy trying to count the leaves on a single tree. I need to step back, distance myself, stop looking, and then maybe I can finally - "Oh! See?"

I shared a grin with my favorite sister. She really was the best, both for her foresight and her willingness to put up with me. I zipped across the room, snagging the phone from the table where I had left it just as it started to ring.

Not only had Alice seen her call, but she saw me flying through the forest, with Carlisle on my heels, surely on our way to join the three on their hunt.

And after that, everything changed.

Only Bella's coming trip to visit the Volturi, just days hence, remained. Strangely, even that seemed hazy and uncertain now. Everything else swirled and shifted too fast for me to catch more than glimpses of my family members abroad. Jasper in a dense tropical jungle. Rose and Emmett on a cobblestone street. Carlisle and Esme striding through a desert landscape, a trio of pyramids rising in the background. A snowy mountain ridge. A rolling green hillside. City after city, some of them familiar, some of them not. A kaleidoscope vision of our trip around the world, condensed to a fraction of a second.

Yes! We were leaving at last!

"Bella?" I said, anticipating good news.

Before Bella even began to speak, I beckoned to Carlisle and strode for the door. Alice remained seated at the computer, locked in the swirling future.

"Come, bring Carlisle," Bella said so quickly a human would not have distinguished them as separate words. There was an urgency to her voice that had me increasing my speed before Bella could explain what troubled her so. "I saw Irina, and she saw me, bun then she saw Jacob and she got mad and ran away, I think. She hasn't shown up here - yet, anyway - but she looked pretty upset so maybe she will. If she doesn't, you and Carlisle have to go after her and talk to her. I feel so bad."

I saw no reason for Bella to feel bad about Irina's anger. If anything, Laurent's death was my fault. There was no way he would have threatened Bella had I been where I belonged, and stayed with her. I would have killed him myself if he'd so much as considered hunting the girl I loved, and he knew that. He hadn't even dared to attack when he'd been allied with James, whom he'd considered unbeatable.

"We'll be there in half a minute," I told her, glad we were already on the way.

Irina would have to be made to understand. Their bond could not have been all that strong if he had been here, acting on Victoria's orders. He would never have left Irina if they had been mates, certainly not to do the bidding of another woman, and nor would he have attempted to harm us, Irina's cousins, if he'd truly loved her.

I wasn't sure why this was what finally prompted my family to leave Forks, but Bella must be worried that if Irina were angry enough, she would seek vengeance against Jacob for killing Laurent. Irina had already proved to be willing to let us fight off an army when we refused to permit her retaliation. We only survived because of Jacob and his pack. I owed the wolves my life a thousand times over. Bella always sought to protect those she loved, and I knew she loved Jacob - loved him enough to decide with absolute certainty that now was the time to leave Forks. I guessed this meant Jacob would be coming with us after all.

Well, that was fine, really.

It was about time I return the favor and protect him for a change. Besides, it would make Bella happy, and Nessie, too.

Half a second passed as I considered the implications.

"It's Irina," I explained to Carlisle. "She saw Bella with Jacob, became angry, and ran away."

"Ah. That is unfortunate. Esme was looking forward to reuniting with our cousins."

"We all were," I agreed and then laughed. "Maybe we still can. I run faster than she does. I wasn't planning on running to Canada today, but if that's what it takes…"

We must help her if we can. She needs her family; she's been alone too long.

"She must know she's better off without him. Even if she could ignore that he tried to kill Bella," I heard the hard anger in my voice, "Laurent wasn't willing to give up his human diet. I know Irina didn't want to go back to that lifestyle. She's waited this long to find real love. I don't think she would have lowered her standards for him."

Love is not so rational.

I grunted at his memories of my own irrational behavior.

I meant more specifically, she has been isolated since your wedding, without even her sisters to share in her burden of grief. Such solitude is not healthy.

"He left her," I insisted, stubbornly.

And you think that does not hurt her, too?

"She's loved before. It's not like he was her first and only. She and her sisters are the very essence of promiscuity. So she lost a boyfriend - lost him to another woman before he died, I might add - he was just the latest in a long line. At least this time she didn't kill him herself."

I didn't want to feel charitable toward her feelings for him. Irina's pain and loneliness were her own doing. Grieving over a murderer? How ridiculous. Would she have shared in my pain, had he been successful? Would she have felt an ounce of remorse over the death of the girl who was my only reason for existing?

His eyes were on me, and though he kept his expression neutral, I could feel his disapproval over my self-righteousness.

Sighing, I relented. "Maybe I'm just biased. It was Bella he tried to kill, after all."

I think she refuses to believe he would have been capable of it. Her feelings for him may be clouding her judgement.

I understood his implication that my judgement had often been so compromised.

In her mind, he must have had some justification for being here, something other than seeking Bella's death. Therefore, his death was senseless, unwarranted. Whatever reason he gave for his absence, she expected him to return to her.

Despite my irritation with Irina's choice in partner, if she had cared for him enough to feel the pain of his passing, I supposed I should try to empathize with her, at least a little. Hers might be a fraction of what I would have felt, but pain was pain.

"We'll find her," I said, making sure to infuse my voice with the sympathy I should have felt.

His lips pressed into a thin line, worried that we wouldn't find her if she didn't want to be found. The padding of heavy paws on a course that would intercept ours put paid to our conversation. Seconds later, Seth and Leah were pacing us. Through their interconnected thoughts, I saw Jacob's, and through him, Bella's worried expression.

Automatically, my speed increased. Seconds later, I burst through the trees and into the clearing where Bella waited. Carlisle, Seth, and Leah joined us an instant later.

As soon as I was by her side, Bella pointed to a stone outcrop rising above the trees. "She was up on that ridge. Maybe you should call Emmett and Jasper and have them come with you. She looked… really upset. She growled at me."

"What?" Fury made my voice hard.

"She's grieving," Carlisle reminded me, gripping my arm as if he expected me to launch myself after Irina for daring to growl at my beloved wife.

Truth be told, he wasn't far off. I itched to find her and tell her off. The nerve of that woman!

Reading my anger as accurately as Jasper would have, Carlisle insisted, "I'll go after her."

I wiped my expression clear of anger and made my voice calm. "I'm coming with you."

My father stared at me for a long minute, gauging my intention.

Knowing the one thing that could keep me from accompanying him, he thought, Would you not rather stay, keep Bella safe?

I would, of course I would. There was no place in the world I wanted to be, ever, but in Bella's company. And yet… I craved my father's approval nearly as much. I so wanted to be worthy of his love, and of hers, and that meant letting go of my selfishness, being responsible.

Bella had her newborn strength, as well as the protection of Jacob, Seth, and Leah. I would be superfluous if I stayed. Redundant. A feeling I seldom enjoyed. My best option for protecting Bella was leaving her, if only for the short time it would take to find our cousin.

Until Irina was found, Bella would worry. I couldn't have her feeling threatened, nor worrying over my safety nor that of Jacob's. She wanted us to call Emmett and Jasper as bodyguards! As if I couldn't protect myself from an angry succubus. Besides, I would never live it down if I asked either of my brothers for protection against one of the Denali sisters. I couldn't imagine Irina attacking Carlisle, or any of our family for that matter. No, surely our family was safe, including Bella. Irina had the chance to confront her just now and passed it up.

Carlisle didn't need protection, but he did need the advantage of my gift in order to find Irina. She could disguise her scent, but all we needed was to get within a few miles of her, and I would hear her regardless. No body of water could hide the sound of her thoughts.

I might not be able to hide my anger from Carlisle or Irina, but I didn't need to talk to her. All I had to do was find her.

Irina wasn't likely to hear whatever I had to say anyway, but she would listen to Carlisle.

Eventually, he accepted my help with a curt nod. As one, we sprinted in the direction Bella had indicated.