A/N: Hey there, before I proceed with Ch2, I just want to say a HUGE thank you my wonderful reviewers. Thanks so much :) Now, let the fun begin.

Chapter Two: Evil Plans

"So," said Merry, "Who are we going to prank first?" Both Merry and Pippin were sitting on the former's bed. Merry had a piece of parchment and a quill which he had salvaged from Elrond's study, and Pippin was holding the inkwell.

The younger hobbit looked surprised at being asked to choose, so Merry added,

"I'm only letting you choose because you're the victim. On any other occasion, I'd choose."

"Oh, alright then, gosh, thanks Merry." Pippin frowned thoughtfully. "Well, seeing as he was so snobbish and rude to me, and he made me feel so small and insignificant…"

"Pip," Merry interrupted, "You are small and insignificant. The word you're looking for here is belittled, Pip, and I'm assuming it was Legolas, right?"

"Yes, it was, and I am not insignificant! I may be small, but I am definitely not insignificant!" Pippin harrumphed.

"Yes, yes, yes. So we're pranking Legolas first?"

Pippin nodded.

"Great," said Merry, "and we'll call it Operation Prissy Princeling!" Both hobbits had a good giggle and Merry wrote it down.

"Hey, that's kind of like a tongue-twister," said Pippin, as he was having trouble pronouncing the phrase, "Prissy Prissling! No no no! Prissy Princeling! Ah, I got it! Prissy Prissling! Oh, bother!"

"Next!" said Merry.

"Oh, I know!" Pippin rubbed his bruised leg, scowling darkly, "Strider and that Arwen, that's for sure! I'll make 'em pay!" The hobbit rubbed his hands together, grinning gleefully, "Revenge will be sweet!"

"Alright, what are we going to call it then."

"How about Operation Lustful lovers?"

"Oh yeah, even though Strider would call it 'INNAPROPRIATE'." Merry put it down. "Hee hee, Operation Lustful Lovers…" he snorted.

"Right, we'll prank Sam next," said Pip, "and we'll call it…Operation Gullible Gardener! How does that sound?"

"Great," said Merry, scribbling on the parchment, "How about Frodo next?"

"Yeah, why not?" Pippin tried to think of a title, but Merry beat him to it.

"Operation Ridiculous Ringbearer!" Merry wrote it down before Pippin had a chance to agree or disagree, "Who else then?"

"How about the Lord Elrond?" Pippin suggested.

"Pip," said Merry, showing some of his occasional sense, "We are NOT going to prank the Lord Elrond, and that is final!"

"But---"

"No buts. Subject closed!"

"Just thought I'd ask…" Pippin muttered.

"Well," said Merry, "Let me repeat – Who else do you want to prank?"

"Err," Pippin thought for a minute, "Well, there's that man from that far off city – Bondor or something; he doesn't look too intelligent – he walked into the wall this morning – we could prank him."

"I think it's Gondor, Pip, and Strider told me his name's Boromir, and he's a sort of prince, though his father's not really a king yet. I think he must actually be quite smart, even if he doesn't act it. I think he was drunk this morning…"

"Yeah, anyway, I think he'd make a good target for a prank, don'tcha think."

"I wholeheartedly agree. This prank game is going to be fun."

"Yes, and he was ignoring me. He didn't exactly come knocking on my door asking for a game of chess. I'm actually quite good at chess, Merry, did you know that? We should have a game sometime…"

"No, Pip, I can't imagine you playing chess, let alone being good at it. Your logic is somewhat less than the average hobbit."

"Says who?"

"Well, sometimes it's kinda obvious."

"What do you mean by that? Are you insulting me, because even if I can't play chess, which I can, I'm telling you now, I can fight!"

"Cool it, Pip. Let's get back to the subject. So, we're going to prank this Boromir man?"

"Yup."

"But we can't have a Gullible Gondorian – we've already got a gullible gardener…"

"How about Operation Gormless Gondorian?"

"Pip, you're a genius!" Merry wrote it down.

"I am?"

"No."

"Oh."

"Anyone else then?"

"Yeah – that dwarf, Gimlit."

"Gimli, Pip."

"Whatever. When I knocked on his door, he just said, no, correction, he just growled, 'get away!' I could smell pipeweed, so he must've been having a smoke without inviting me. That is definitely worthy of punishment, don't you think?"

"Aye, Pip! Down with the dwarf! Now, what shall we call this?"

"Operation Grouch!"

"Right, got it."

Pippin was on a roll. "Then we'll prank old Gandalf!"

"Err, Pip, that is NOT a good idea…"

"Yes, it is!" Pippin insisted, "Anyway," he said boldly, "if you want to get cold feet, then I will do it myself! Happy?"

"No way, Pip! We're both in this together, and Meriadoc Brandybuck does not get cold feet, no sir!"

"Alright, so we prank Gandalf then?" Pippin challenged. He knew he had beaten Merry, and he was proud of it, as this did not happen often.

"Yeah, I suppose so," said Merry resignedly.

"Great. Operation Wearisome Wizard! I'm sooo clever with words, aren't I?"

"No, not really, and what you're doing is called Alliteration." Merry wrote 'Wearisome Wizard' down.

"Alliter-what?"

"Never mind. Now I think we need one more prank to finish everything off, a Grand Finale, don't you think?"

Pippin nodded excitedly.

"We'll prank everyone, and it will be something that they will never forget! We'll do it in the hall!"

Pippin nodded again, wondering if 'everyone' included the Lord Elrond. He grinned.

"And we'll call it," said Merry,

"Revenge of the Hobbits!" they both cried simultaneously, and grinning, they slapped a high-five, "Whooo!"

oXo

"So," said Merry, once they were serious again, or, attempting seriousness, "Now we have to plan out the pranks. What's the first one again – oh," he glanced down at his sheet, chuckling, "Prissy Princeling!"

"Oh, yes!" said Pippin, "Now what does our Prissy Prissling (sorry, I just can't get my tongue around that one, dammit) hate, besides hobbits?

"Hmm," said Merry, prissy, snobbish Princeling Leggy would hate to have his hair messed, you can see that!"

A smile slowly spread across Pippin's face. "I've got it!" he squeaked, and quickly told Merry his plan.

The older hobbit sniggered and scribbled frantically next to Prissy Princeling. "Next is Lustful Lovers," he said.

"Oh," said Pip, "That'll be easy. We'll just mess Arwen's hair, and Strider, well…oh, I know!"

oXo

And so the hobbits continued planning their evils until they had successfully plotted all of their pranks, including their Grand Finale, which took them ages, but eventually they finished.

"Well, Pip," said Merry, shaking out his aching wrist, "Rivendell is in for a few little surprises!"

"Oh yeah, some real treats!"

"I'll say, now what do you say to a good old pint in the kitchens?"

Both hobbits grinned, Merry shoved the parchment and quill under the mattress and hid the empty inkwell under the bed, and they went down to the kitchen practically in a state of euphoria, although Merry's might have been caused by the excessive amount of sugar he had consumed.

TBC

A/N: Well, how was that? Review and tell me. Ch3 is coming next weekend, I hope, as I'm not even finished writing it yet, let alone typing it, but it'll be worth the wait, I promise :) The pranks will begin! Namárië and keep those great reviews coming – I love you guys,

-o-Windsong of Darkness-o-