Us & Them
Prelude
My story starts exactly at the end of season 2, when Kate, Jack and Sawyer are leaving the Island with the Others. This is my first Fanfic and English is not my first language so please understand why I make a lot of mistakes and why my vocabulary or description are limited. My story is only about Jack, Kate, Sawyer and the Others. My fanfic is a Skate one but it's just take time. I think that at the beginning of season 3, Kate doesn't understand her feeling very well but she will I swear.
Chapter 1: Welcome!
At least, they were leaving the Island. Not the way he tough he would, on a boat with Doc and Freckles but also with them. By them, he means Tom (or Zeke), Mrs Klugh (or Bea), Alex, Henry and some other guys he never saw before. As soon as they left the Island, Alex took off the bag they had on their head so they could see and freed their hands. But there were still 3 guys with guns aimed at them so fighting was not an option. Kate was sitting next to Jack. She seems really upset. Jack too. His jaw was really stiff and his eyes were close. Nobody was speaking. Sawyer was standing at the back of the boat, near Alex. He just couldn't stand the silence anymore. He had to say something.
So Princess, will you have the pleasure to tell me where the hell we are going, asked Sawyer with an angry tone.
I'm sorry, I can't tell you, she answered quickly.
I'm so surprise, he answered in a low voice not looking at her.
Two of the guys with the guns were watching Sawyer really closely and he was getting really pissed by them.
You want my picture Jackass?
The guy did not answer but stopped looking at him. He was really young and looked a bit scared. That makes him smile. "Asshole"
Jack and Kate were now talking to each other in a low voice. Nobody was really paying attention to them. HE was the bad guy, not them.
So, any interesting story I should know about? he asked walking toward them and sitting next to Jack. The guards were still aiming the guns at him.
I was just wandering why they freed us, said Kate.
Well, they have the guns, so it doesn't matter if we are tied or not, answered Jack looking attentively to Sawyer.
No need to look at me like that Doc, I'm not going to attack them if it's what worry you.
Sawyer wasn't happy about that comment but he must admit that he did think about fighting but he would not put Kate in danger because of his stupidity. Kate smile at him and Sawyer could tell that she was relief.
The boat was going as fast as possible but they could still see the Island. And it was getting dark. Sawyer was getting cold and very hungry. After what seem like eternity, somebody finally came to talk to them. It was Mrs. Klugh. She looked at them attentively. Sawyer got up.
We will arrive in about 20 minutes. As soon as we land, you will be escorted to your rooms and you will stay there for the rest of the night. Someone will bring you clothes and food. You will be lock inside so there is no need on trying to open the door. (She was now looking at Sawyer)You will also receive a schedule for tomorrow.
A schedule? So we are back to elementary school now, spitted Sawyer. Kate looked at him with an angry look.
This schedule will tell you exactly what we are expecting you to do for the rest of the week.
So what are we, prisoners?
Sawyer, shut up, said Kate.
Mrs Klugh continued as if Sawyer wasn't there.
I will see you all tomorrow.
On that, she returned in front of the boat. They could now see land in front of them but it was so dark now that they couldn't see much. The boat finally stopped and everybody started to leave.
Please, follow me, said Alex.
Like if we had the choice, mumbled Sawyer.
The new place looked exactly like the Island with sand and trees all over the place. But after 5 minutes of walk, they could see a big grey building in front of them. Alex and two guards were leading the way. There were a few people walking around looking at them as they reached the building. Some were guards, some just normal people with weird clothes and also kids. Inside the building, there was a long hall and many closed doors with numbers on it. They walk for 10 minutes without seeing anybody, turning left and right so many times that they were sure they would never find their rooms again. Suddenly, a guy all dressed in white arrive from nowhere and whispered something in Alex ear.
Oh, I see, she answered, then, she looked at them. The guy was already gone. He didn't seem to enjoy his task.
Unfortunately, we have only two rooms for you guys so I suggest that Kate take one and you two can share the other one. Sawyer could immediately see that Kate was a bit terrified with the idea of spending the night alone.
Can we stay the three of us? She asked hoping for an affirmative answer.
I'm afraid not. There is only two beds in a room and stuff for two people, she answered with a gentle smile.
Kate looked seriously disappointed. Jack looked at him. Sawyer sighed deeply. He knew he had to do it.
What about I take your freeroomate room and Freckles and the Doc can share the other one, proposed Sawyer, obviously not making that proposition with a lot of enthusiasm.
Its fine with me, said Alex.
Kate looked at Sawyer with a thankful smile.
Thanks, she said.
Don't thank me. I should be the one thanking you. I have a room all for me after all, said Sawyer with a false cheerful tone.
Jack looked at him and node. It was hard to imagine that Sawyer could do something nice for a change. They all looked at each other and after a quick goodnight entered in their respective room.
Sawyer's room was quite small but clean with twin bed, a wardrobe, a small table in a corner and a chair.
Great, I'm sure there's no chance I can have a beer here. And no TV.
Sawyer opened the bathroom's door and was happy to see a shower there.
Well, at least I can get clean and it's better then the hatch.
Sawyer got undressed quickly and jumped in the shower. That was great. There was shampoo, soap, towels and even a razor.
Mmmmm….maybe I should shave…why the hell not, taking the razor and the shaving cream in his hand.
In the other room, Jack and Kate were already in bed, too exhausted for a shower. The room was exactly the same as Sawyer. Kate was about to close her eyes when she saw a piece of paper on the desk so she decide to get up and have a look at it.
What is it Kate? asked Jack
I think it's our schedule for the week, she said grinning.
What's so funny about it?
Well, it's written that Sawyers day start at 7h30 tomorrow morning. Something tells me that he's not going to appreciate to be the first one up.
And what about us?
Mine started at 8h30 and yours at 9h30. You're a lucky man.
I don't think being looked in a room on a freaky island in the middle of the ocean with strangers is luck.
I know Jack, I know, she said with a small voice.
I'm sorry Kate.
Sorry about what?
About everything. Nothing is going the way I tough it would.
There nothing you could do about that Jack. It's not your fault. We all agree to follow Michael.
Yeah, but Sayid warned me about Michael acting weirdly. I hope he's alright. We were supposed to meet him.
I'm sure he's fine. He is a soldier remember?
Yeah, hope Hurley found his way back to the camp. I don't know how everybody will react when they will know that we are gone.
I'm sure they will be alright. What do you think they want with us?
I really have no clue. The good news is, they want us alive or we would already be dead by now, right?
Yeah, she answered without excitement. I think we better sleep. I don't know what time is it but I'm sure it's late.
It's 1h15 in the morning, he said showing her the small clock behind the door.
Great! Good night Jack.
Good night.
Kate closed her eyes but she knew she wouldn't be sleeping before a while. Her brain was still full of the event of the last days; Michael killing Ana and Libby, the rescue mission, the capture, the boat and now being lock in a room and not knowing what's going to happen the next day. At least she was not alone. She had Jack and Sawyer. Sawyer. I hope he's alright. He's probably pissed because I'm here with Jack, she tough smiling to herself. Kate could tell that Jack was asleep by the sound of his breathing. So she listened to it till she fell asleep as well.
Sawyer also had a hard time to fall asleep. He was really tired but also quite mad. He hated not being in control of his life and he swore that they will pay for that. There's no way he's going to do what they want him to do. Who the hell they think they are? Slaves?
He just realised how much his life changed in the last month. Will we go back to the real world, he asked himself. Like if I care. There's nothing for me to go back there, just my bank accounts. Now, he was missing the sound of the waves. It's amazing how you can become dependant of a sound to fall asleep. Kate. Hope she's fine. I'm sure Jack will take care of her anyway. Sawyer couldn't stop thinking about how he really screwed it by sleeping with Ana Lucia. And Jack knows about it. He will probably tell her one day or another. Damn, there's nothing I can do about it now isn't it? He was not mad at himself, about how stupid he was and how his life was lame.
Chapter 2: Sawyer's and Kate's first meeting
Sawyer tough he was dreaming. There was a women standing next to the bed looking at him. It was Alex.
Bloody hell women, never heard of knocking on the door? he said still trying to wake up.
I did.
Well, I didn't say you can come in. What time is it?
Almost 7h.
You must be kidding, he said closing his eyes again.
I'm just delivering your breakfast, she said putting a small box on his table. I guess you didn't take a look to your schedule. Your meeting Mrs Klugh in 30 minutes so you should get ready, she doesn't like to wait.
Oh really, he answered standing up so quickly that Alex step back. Well, I don't give a shit about it so now get out of here!
Alex looked at him, not impress at all.
Don't say I didn't warn you, she said with a suspicious smile on here face and she left the room.
It was much too early for Sawyer to get up but he now realize that he was starving and the idea of a breakfast didn't seem so bad after all. The breakfast was nothing impressive, just toasts, orange juice and a banana but he ate it all without any complaint. Then he went back to his bed and lie down, closing his eyes, already forgetting about Alex warning.
Sawyer woke up a couple of minutes later with a horrible pain in his right arm. He looked at his arm and saw a black metallic bracelet around it with a small green light and a yellow knob.
What the hell is that? He asked to himself.
I'm glad to see your awake M. Ford, said a voice just behind him.
Sawyer looked behind him. It was Mrs Klugh. She was sitting on the chair with a big green folder in her hands. She didn't look in a good mood.
Jesus people, how many of you will come waking me up today? He said slowly standing up.
Now that you are ready we can now start our meeting Mr Ford. We are 5 minutes late and I hate being late. I suggest that you sit on this chair.
It was an order more than a suggestion.
Maybe I prefer to stand up.
Do you like your new bracelet M. Ford? She asked ignoring his comment.
Now that you're mentioning it, no I don't! What's that shit for?
You want me to show you again?
Then he suddenly remembered the pain in his arm that woke him up. He mumbled something and sat down. Sawyer swore he saw a small smile on her face but it was quickly gone. Then she stood up and pushed the little table in front of him, gave him a pen and some pieces of paper?
You want me to write a story or something?
In fact yes I do, she said, sitting back on her chair and now opening the folder.
Do you know what I have in my hand M. Ford.
He hated the way she was pronouncing his last name.
What's the point of me loosing time by guessing, I'm sure you're dying to tell me.
Now he saw her smiling but he couldn't say if it was a good sign.
For once, you're right. That folder is all the information we have about you M. Ford, or should I call you Sawyer.
It seems you're already made your choice, he said.
She looked at her watch and started reading the information in the folder.
So what story you want me to write?
I'm afraid it's going to be a very long story. I want to know everything that happen to you and the others since you crashed on the island M. Ford.
Hell, how I'm I suppose to remember all that?
The paper I gave you should help you. There are 10 questions on it.
And let me guess, the answer is not A, B or C?
It should take you about two hours. You'll have 10 more questions everyday till we decide we have enough information.
What about my friends? They have to do that to?
Of course not. Why would we loose our time by asking the same questions three times?
So what there going to do?
You'll have plenty of time to ask them later. If they want to tell you.
Why me? Why do I have to answer these stupid questions and not them?
Because you're friends didn't go on the raft M.Ford.
So she knew about the raft. Sawyer had the feeling that she already knew a lot about what happened on the Island.
How do you know I'll tell the truth?
- That's your choice M. Ford. If you want to lie, you'll have to live with the consequences, she said now standing up and getting ready to leave the room.
When you answered all the questions, just push the yellow knob on your bracelet and someone will come to take your paper.
And what after that?
I suggest you take a look to your schedule M. Ford she said.
Then, she left the room and closed the door behind her.
Great! I have to write shit every single day now.
Sawyer red the first question. "Tell us about the crash". Then he looked at the 9 others and after a long sight, started writing. The questions were not really hard but he didn't like the last one. "What do you know about Miss Kathryn Austen?" Sure, he knew a lot of stuff but he didn't want to write all of it. He already answered the same kind of questions about Jack and Hurley and he wrote what he knew, witch wasn't much but with Kate, what about her being a prisoner? They probably knew it already but there's no way he was going to tell them that. So, he just wrote the good stuff, the missions she did, the delivery of Aaron, and the way she took care of him when he was injured. And he put some shit stuff about her parent being dead and her living in Iowa. They don't need to know everything. He looked at the clock. It was already 10h30. It took him almost 3 hours! Shit, he was really slow. Let's hope tomorrow's questions will be easier. He pressed the knob on his bracelet and waited.
Kate woke up before Jack. She looked at the clock and saw that it was only 7h45. She stretched lazily in her bed, got up in silence and went to the bathroom for a shower. She took her time and when she went back to her bed, she saw that Jack was awake and was eating his breakfast.
Good morning, he said. Someone came for our breakfast. Yours in on your bed.
Thanks, she said, sitting on her bed.
I never tough I would be so happy to eat toasts in my life he said trying to cheer her up, but it didn't seem to work.
Kate was worry. She had a very bad feeling about her meeting. What if they knew about her past? Would she go to jail?
You should try to eat a bit said Jack gently.
I know, I'm not very hungry.
Kate..
I'm alright Jack.
I'm sure everything will be ok. You just have a meeting like Sawyer and I have.
Hope you're right. Sawyer is probably in his meeting now. Hope he's not getting into trouble.
You know Sawyer, he's always getting into trouble.
Yeah, she conceded, finally smiling at him.
At exactly 8h30, someone knocked on the door. Kate flinched and neither of them said anything. Mrs Klugh was at the door and without any greeting, just looked at Kate.
It's meeting time Miss Austen. Please follow me.
Kate nodded and after a last glance at Jack, left the room and followed her. They walked for about 5 minutes in the hall in a straight line till the elevator. They went in and Mrs Klugh pressed the number 5.
The fifth floor was a very busy one with lots of people talking and walking around. Kate was surprised that nobody seems to pay attention to them.
Sorry but, what are all these people doing exactly? asked Kate
They are working Miss Austen.
And what are their works?
Research, mainly. There are 6 floors in this building and each one has his own speciality. You'll know more about it this afternoon. Here we are, she said just before turning left in a small room with a round table and two chairs.
There was a computer on the table and a white screen on the wall at the back of the room.
Please, sit down. I will be very direct with you Miss Austen. We know exactly who you are and what you did. I want to show you something.
Kate was getting really nervous. Her worst fear came true. They knew about her past. She was in trouble she knew it.
Then something appeared on the screen. It was something she would have preferred not to see.
As you know Miss Austen, the FBI wants to find you very much and they are ready to pay a lot of money for that.
Kate nodded but didn't say anything. She was starting to shake.
Mrs Klugh was looking at her with a different look. She sat down next to her and touched her hand. Kate was so surprise by the gesture that she jumped. Mrs Klugh was still looking at her but she seemed now friendlier.
I must tell you Mrs Austen that here, we don't care about the FBI and we certainly don't need their money.
Kate was really surprise to ear her statement. She was getting more interested in the conversation.
I want you to listen very carefully because you'll have an important choice to make here.
What kind of choice? She asked hopefully
The kind of choice that can change you life Kate.
She was using her fist name for the first time.
What would you say if I tell you that what you see on this screen can be erase just like that? That you could have a new beginning, a new life. All the things you tough you could never have anymore, I can give it to you. A job, an apartment, a family, your freedom. I can erase your past.
Kate's brain was so full of tough. Was she dreaming this conversation? That couldn't be real. She must be dreaming. How could she offer her something like that? Kate was not shaking anymore. Something in her expression changed. With the most intense look she ever gave, she said:
I would say, what do you want me to do?
Mrs Klugh was now smiling.
Chapter 3: Tell me!
After some guy came to take his paper, Sawyer was surprise to see that the door wasn't locked anymore and that he could go wherever he wanted. Before leaving his room, he decided to have a look at his schedule. He saw that Kate's meeting was just an hour after his so it should be over by now. The schedule was quite empty in fact. Just the usual meeting in the morning and a 2 hours meeting at 18h00. Jack and Kate also had the same meeting at the same time so they would be together. Sawyer left his room and decided to explore the new place. After just two minutes of walk, he already passed 6 persons and they all greeted him, 4 of them being women. He decided to keep going straight , a bit scare of getting lost. At the end of the hall, there was a big room with tables and chairs. It's looked like a canteen or something like that. There was a couple a people sitting and eating. Just when he tough he should explore somewhere else, he saw Kate sitting at a table alone reading something. He approached slowly and sat in front of her.
Hey Freckles, is everything alright? He asked a bit concerned by the expression on her face.
Kate didn't see him coming so she jumped a bit.
Sawyer, you scared me.
He just smiled at her and she smiled back.
So, how was your day ? she asked.
They woke me up at 7h00 and I had to answer a bunch of weird questions about the island and stuff. And the best part is that I will have more questions everyday. Pain in the ass, believe me.
What kind of questions?
He gave her an example of two or three questions without mentioning the last one of course.
What about you're meeting Sass? He asked with a lot of interest.
Not much to say. A bit the same as you, she said looking at the table next to them.
Sawyer knew she was lying. The women told him that he was the only one with the questions and he knew she was telling the truth.
What's that you're reading? He asked changing subject.
What? She asked not knowing what he was talking about.
That paper here, he said taking it from her hands.
Give me that Sawyer, she said abruptly taking the paper back.
Hey, don't yell at me like that, I was just asking. So, what is it?
Nothing important. They just want me to read it that's all.
If I didn't know you more Freckles, I would say you're hiding something.
Why do you want to know so much anyway?
I told you what my meeting was about, I just tough you would do the same. It's seemed I'm loosing my time here, he said suddenly getting up ready to leave.
Sawyer wait!
He turned around and waited.
I'm sorry. I can't tell you now. It's just very complicated, she said nervously.
She looked really upset and Sawyer just couldn't stay angry with her.
When it's suit you Freckles, he said sitting again.
She gave him a grateful smile.
Would you please tell Jack that I did the same thing then you? Just questions and stuff?
So you don't want the good Doc to know about it neither, he said happy that she wasn't hiding the truth just from him.
I don't want him to worry that's all.
And what about me being worry, it doesn't matter isn't it?
That's not what I said.
That's what it seemed to me, he said getting up and leaving.
But she followed him.
Where are you going? she asked walking next to him.
I don't know, maybe I'll just go and talk to that pretty lady I saw on my way here!
Sawyer!
Just kidding, what about we just look around, and maybe we'll found Jack.
That's a good idea. But we have to come back here in haft an hour.
What the hell for?
Lunch!
Great, he said smiling.
So they walk around for about 30 minutes, meeting more people that they could count, all dressed with the same white clothes, smiling at them. They could only stay on the ground floor because a special key was needed for the elevator and they couldn't find the stairs. They came back to the canteen where they finally met Jack. He was sitting at a table with two other people, talking. Kate and Sawyer grab a tray of food and sat next to Jack
Hi Jack, said Kate.
Kate, I'm glad to see you, he said smiling at her.
Yeah, I'm great. My meeting was quite easy in fact.
I'm glad to ear that.
Jack didn't ask any question about Kate's meeting.
Kate, Sawyer, I want you to meet Kelly and Mitch. They are the two doctors in charge here.
After the usual greeting and small talk, the two doctors left the table pretending to have an appointment soon.
So, who are those morons Doc? asked Sawyer
I told you. They are doctors.
Yeah, but what they want from you Doc?
Jack stayed silent for a minute.
Did I just ask you a question? said Sawyer getting angrier. Why the hell was everybody keeping secret from him.
Yes you did. As you know I'm a doctor too so we just talk about work. They wanted my opinion on some cases.
What for? asked Kate
They just lost four of their doctors in the last three month and they asked me if I'd like to join them.
Will you? asked Kate looking straight at him.
I don't know Kate. I'm a doctor and if people need me I have to do something. Some of their patients need surgery quickly and I know I can help them.
What the hell does that mean? You want to be one of them? Walking around with those freaking clothes? Working for them? Did you already forget what they did to us?
Sawyer was really pissed with Jack now.
No I didn't forget. In the island I helped as much as I could whoever the person was, bad or good, guilty or not, he said looking at Sawyer. You should know that Sawyer!
Sawyer didn't answer. He took his tray with him and just went back to his room leaving Kate and Jack alone. He didn't care about Jack. Hell, he could do whatever he wanted. If he likes helping the enemy, it's his problem. Sawyer finished his meal and decided to lie down. In fact, he was more upset about Kate's secret. What could have happened in her meeting? It's certainly not the police or FBI, she would already be in jail no? God, he hates secret! Everything would be so much easier if everybody was telling the truth. Well, maybe not all the truth after all, thinking at his own secrets.
Chapter 4: I promise
Someone was shaking him violently.
Sawyer, please wake up! said a really upset Kate.
Jesus Freckles, what's the matter? asked Sawyer slowly sitting on his bed and looking at her.
It's Jack, she said nervously. He's leaving!
What? Leaving where?
I don't know. He didn't tell me. I heard him talking with someone just now! I don't think he knew I was there.
It was obvious that Kate was really disturbed by the possibility of Jack leaving them.
Well, maybe you didn't hear properly, he said trying to sound optimist.
No, no! I know what I heard. I want you to talk to him.
Why the hell would I do that? he asked already knowing what she would answer.
He's our friend Sawyer. We can't let him go!
Why not? If he wants to leave, it's fine with me. Maybe he just doesn't care about us as much as you do about him.
He saved your life Sawyer!
So what, that doesn't mean we have to be together forever. He's a big man Kate, I'm sure he knows what he's doing.
Kate didn't answer. She seemed to feel a bit better but she still had that look in her eyes that Sawyer couldn't bear. He sat on the bed and sight deeply.
Where is he?
Near the door, outside.
Sawyer got up and was about to leave the room.
Where are you going? she asked looking worry.
I thought you want me to talk to him, he said calmly.
Then she smiled at him, with that wonderful smile only she could do. How the hell he was supposed to resist to that? He couldn't believe it. Asking Jack not to leave was probably the last thing he wanted to do right now. Sawyer didn't smile back and left the room.
Jack was nowhere to be seen near the door outside so Sawyer decided to go a bit further. There was a small path leading to the beach. After few minutes, Sawyer saw him sitting on a big rock alone. He was lost in his tough. Kate was probably right. He had this busy look on his face.
Hey Doc, what you're doing here? he said as if he was just passing by.
What do you want Sawyer? He answered unfriendly not raising his eyes.
Sawyer wanted to slap him on the face but Kate would not appreciate the gesture so he ignored his comment and sat in front of him.
Last time I saw you like that Doc, there was someone dead in front of you.
Sawyer tough he would react violently to his comment but Jack just smile.
Since when are you concerned about my well-being?
I'm not. But she is.
Who? Kate?
No, Minnie Mouse! Of course Kate! he replied harshly
What's wrong with her? He asked with concerned.
She told me about your little trip your planning to do, he said knowing that's it was not exactly what she said.
How does she know that?
Doesn't matter how. What matter it's if it's true or not.
Jack didn't answer to the question and looked away.
I suppose it's a yes, he guessed. When are you leaving?
Tomorrow.
Wow, you didn't take long before finding somewhere better Doc.
That's not what you think Sawyer. You and Kate will not stay here forever neither. There is a reason why everybody in this place is here. Some are just here a bit longer then others. Once you achieved what they want you to, you're free to go.
And you already achieved yours? Sawyer asked now really captivate by his story.
No. But they told me mine was somewhere else to be done. And you know what? I think they are right.
Where are you going exactly?
I don't know yet but they said I should be back in the real world in three or four month.
I hope your planning to tell her all that right?
Yeah, I'll speak to her.
Sawyer was satisfied with that and got up ready to leave.
Sawyer? asked Jack for a last comment.
Yeah?
You'll take care of her right?
As I always do, he replied with his usual smile.
Good.
Good luck Doc, he finally said leaving for good, with an uncomfortable feeling that he just had his last conversation with him.
Sawyer went back in the building It was already 5h50. Shit, the meeting was in 10 minutes. Sawyer looked around but didn't see Kate anywhere. Hell the meeting! Jack was probably not going either. He decided to go back to his room. He was a bit surprise to see Kate asleep on his bed. She looked so peaceful he didn't want to wake her up. God, he could stay there all night looking at her sleeping. She was so beautiful. He took a sheet and covered her with it. He lied down on the other bed on his left side so he could watch her.
Something woke him up. Someone was weeping. It took Sawyer some time to remember where he was, that Kate was in the other bed and that she was the one making the noise.
Sawyer went to her bed and sat next to her. She was really agitated, probably having a nightmare.
Hey Freckles, he said shaking her gently.
She open he eyes suddenly.
Jack?
Sawyer was really pissed that she asked for the Doc.
I'm sorry to disappoint you Sass but it's just me.
Kate finally recognized who what sitting by her side.
Sawyer. Sorry, she said with a faint smile. Did I wake you up?
I don't think you would believe me if I say no.
She smiled again. He loved to see her smile. Then she moved at the back of the bed, showing him that he could lie next to her. He hesitated a second and lied down.
So, I guess I missed the meeting right?
We all missed it.
Oh…and did you…you know.
Yeah. You were right Kate. I'm sorry.
No you're not, she teased him smiling softly.
He's leaving tomorrow. He promised he'll talk to you.
Thanks, she just said lying back and closing her eyes.
Goodnight Kate he said kissing her quickly on her forehead and getting up to go back in his bed.
But Kate didn't let him go. She pulled him back to the bed. Sawyer saw tears on her pretty face. God, he hated Jack to make her feel like that. He put his arm around her and she rested her head on his chest. He caressed her hair softly trying to keep his mind away from tough he didn't want to have now. Just as he tough she was falling asleep, she raise her head slowly.
Sawyer?
Yeah?
You won't leave me alone here right?
Why do you think I will leave you?
Just say you won't leave me, she said, almost begging him.
I won't.
You swear?
Only if you promise me one thing.
What?
That you won't leave me alone here, he said seriously.
She grinned at him.
I promise.
Chapter 5: Goodbye
Prelude: Thanks for the reviews everybody and sorry about the verb tense. I'm really trying to write in the past all the time.
Kate woke up early the next morning with the feeling of having something important to do. It took her few minutes to realise that someone was lying next to her on the bed.
Sawyer… she whispered softly talking to herself
Sawyer was sleeping deeply, one of his arms still around her shoulders. Kate sat up on the bed gently; she didn't want to wake him up. He looked so peaceful….and…..shaved? How did I not notice it before? And why were they sleeping in the same bed? Then, she remembered the dream, the promise and…Jack!
Shit, Jack is leaving today! she said a bit louder then she taught, getting up quickly.
Sawyer turned on his other side but didn't open his eyes. Kate glanced at him one last time before leaving the room. She knocked softly on the door of her own room and opened it but it was empty. Kate was getting really worry. Did he leave without saying goodbye? There were so many things she wanted to tell him; how she was sorry about so many things, how his friendship was precious and how scared she was about being here without him.
Just as she left the room, Jack was standing in front of the door looking at her.
Hey, she said.
Hey, he replied not really knowing what to say.
I was looking for you. I tough you were already gone…
I was looking for you too. I'm leaving soon. Where were you last night?
Sawyer's room.
Oh I see….
Kate didn't say anything and started to walk outside and Jack followed her. She was walking in front of him. She was so angry and confused. She didn't want to cry in front of him, she didn't want him to see that she was hurt.
Kate…he started trying to touch her shoulder.
Don't. It's ok Jack, she said turning around to face him with a lot of control.
It's not like if we'll never see each other again, he said without much conviction.
Really?
I already told Sawyer that you're not going to stay here forever.
I know. We all have a purpose here Jack. They already told me that, she said looking at the ground. She now had tears of anger running down her face.
But what if I can't do what they want me to do Jack?
What is it Kate? he asked with a lot of concern putting his arms around her shoulders. Kate didn't move.
Tell me what they want from you, maybe I can help.
You can't help me this time Jack. Just go. I'll be alright. Sawyer and I will be alright.
Jack didn't like the way she was pushing him away but he could understand how she felt.
I want you to take this, he said giving her a piece of paper.
What is it?
Phone numbers of friends and family. Once you're back in the real world I want you to call them. They will give you my new number. Please, take it and read it.
Kate was touch by the gesture. She put the paper in her pocket without looking at it.
Thanks, she said giving him a huge hug, then she turned around quickly.
Kate…
Goodbye Jack. Take care! She said already walking toward the building. She had to go to her meeting anyway.
Jack was still standing at the same place 5 minutes later. Then someone came for him and he left.
When Sawyer woke up the next morning, the first thing he realised was the empty space next to him. And after that, he realised that Mrs Klugh was standing by the door looking at him.
Bloody hell women, why do you have to wake me up all the time? he said really pissed with her but more because of Kate's absence.
Good morning too M. Ford. I see that you're not use to wake up early in the morning, she said smiling slightly.
Very funny.
I put the questions for today on your desk. You know what you have to do. Have a nice day, she said already leaving.
Sawyer knew that it would probably not be a good day. Jack was leaving today and Kate would probably be crying and upset for a while. He sat down on the chair and start answering the questions as fast as he could. Most of them were about the survivors he didn't know very well so after 1 hour he was already free to go. But Sawyer only wanted to go back to sleep so he returned in his bed. He only slept for it seemed few minutes when he felt a presence next to him.
What do you want again? he asked on a very annoyed tone without opening his eyes.
It's me, Kate. Wake up lazy. You missed lunch.
Sawyer opened his eyes and saw Kate sitting next to him, smiling.
I'm not hungry, he lied trying to be rude.
I'm sure you are. You're always hungry. I brought you something, it's on the table, she said leaving his bed and lying down on the other one.
Sawyer was glad she tough about him, he was in fact starving but didn't want to be thankful.
How was your meeting? He asked taking the tray of food.
Same as yesterday.
Really? he asked not believing her.
Yeah….
So, is the doctor gone? he asked knowing it would hurt her.
Yeah, he left early this morning she answered as if she was just talking about the weather.
Sawyer looked intensely at her trying to see how she felt about it.
Your…ok? He asked desperately hoping she would not cry.
Yeah, I'm fine. He gave me this, she said unfolding the piece of paper Jack gave her.
What is it?
Kate didn't answer. She was reading the piece of paper with a weird look on her face.
What's on that piece of paper Freckles? he repeated.
Kate ignored him again. The only thing she could see now was that little warning on the piece of paper next to the phone numbers. That little warning saying "Ask him how she got the gun".
Chapter 6: Tell me
Damn it Kate! What's on that fucking paper! Sawyer asked loosing his tamper.
Just some phone numbers of Jack relatives, she finally said.
You're sure? You had the face of someone reading his own dead sentence.
I tough I recognize the name of someone that's all she lied standing up.
Where are you going?
Bathroom. Can I?
Suit yourself!
Kate went to the bathroom just to read the paper again.
"Ask him how she got the gun".
Why Jack want me to ask him that? Does he know something I should know? Why he didn't just tell me? Kate knew she would probably not like the answer and she really wasn't in a mood to fight with Sawyer. She put the paper back in her pocket deciding to wait for a better time. Maybe he would tell her himself if it was so important. Kate left the bathroom and sat on the chair next to Sawyer's bed. He was still eating.
Sawyer?
Yeah?
Do you mind if I move here with you?
Sawyer put the empty tray on the table and looked at her with his mocking smile.
I don't know Freckles, there's a pretty blond who asked me the same question about 2 hours ago and I said I'll think about it, he said with a grin in his face.
Sawyer, she said punching him slightly on the shoulder.
Ouch, I guess I'll have to tell her to found somewhere else.
Thanks, she said smiling gratefully.
You're welcome. So, Roomie, what about you tell me what really are those meeting of yours? he suddenly asked breaking the fragile intimacy.
What do you mean? she asked defensively.
Come on Freckles! I know you don't have those stupid questions too.
How do you know that?
I hate telling you this Freckles but I know you enough to know when you're saying the truth or not and now your face is telling me that you're lying.
Maybe I just don't want to talk about it.
That's your choice Sass. If you feel like talking, you know where to find me, he said getting up and walking toward the door.
Where are you going?
I don't know for you but I stayed in that bloody room all day and I need some fresh air.
Can I come?
Do you really need to ask Freckles, he said opening the door for her.
Kate smiled and left the room, followed by Sawyer.
The sun was shining as usual and there were a lot of people around the beach. Sawyer took off his shirt just as they passed by a group of girl giggling and looking at him. Sawyer replied with his sexiest grin.
You really have to do that don't you? she said rolling her eyes.
Why not? They admired the view.
They are almost teenagers Sawyer.
How do you know?
Already talked to one of them.
Witch one?
The tallest one.
When did you meet her?
This morning. She was in the same meeting then me.
Great, maybe you can have her phone numbers for me, he said smiling at her.
Don't even think about it.
If I didn't know you so well, I'd say you're jealous.
You can think whatever you want I don't care, she said sitting on the sand and resting her back on a tree with her eyes closed.
Well, it seems I will have to ask her myself.
What?
Your friend, she coming right now.
Kate opened her eyes and saw Megan coming straight to them. Kate started to panic a little because she had the feeling that she knew exactly why she was here. The girl sat next to Kate after greeting Sawyer with her charming smile. Sawyer smile back but decided to walk away a little but not too far so he could still ear most of the conversation.
Hi Kate.
Hi Meg.
You don't mind if I sit here with you for a while? she asked shyly.
Not at all, she lied.
Great. So, did you ask him?
Ask who about what? replied Kate trying to avoid the conversation.
Come on Kate, you know what I'm talking about.
Kate quickly glanced at Sawyer. He was occupied with one of his shoes but Kate knew he was just pretending to be busy and that he was listening very attentively.
No I haven't.
Will you ask him?
Why do want to know who I'm gonna ask IF I decide to ask someone?
What do mean Kate? You don't want to go back to the real world?
Maybe I don't have as much there then you do.
Oh. Sorry.
Don't be. So, you're thinking about doing it?
Well, I really miss my family you know. I can't imagine how my parent must feel right now.
Must be hard.
So, if you don't ask him, can I?
Kate was really panicking now. She had to find something and quick!
Of course you can, but I'm afraid he'll say no.
Oh…how are you so sure?
Kate moved a bit closer to her and whispered something to her ear.
Oh my god. I can't believe it!
I know. It's sad isn't it?
Yeah. He's so sexy. I guess I'll have to find someone else.
Why don't you ask Jimmy or Luke?
Yeah, that's a great idea. Thanks Kate. You're a real friend. Tell me when you'll make your choice right?
I will. Bye!
Bye!
Megan left looking at Sawyer one more time with a look of despair on her face.
Kate was relief. Sawyer came back and sat next to her and the feeling quickly left replaced by worry again.
What's all that whispering thing about, he asked offended.
Just girl stuff.
What did you tell her about me?
What make you think we talked about you?
Come on Freckles, the girl was all smiles when she arrived here and looked at me as if I was an alien two minutes later. What the hell did you tell her?
It's not important what I told her. Believe me, you should thank me.
Why don't you let me decide if I should thank you or hit you?
Trust me.
And why would I do that? You're just hiding everything from me since we arrived here. I'm starting to think that Jack is the lucky one. Or maybe you already told him everything, he said angrily.
Sawyer please….
Don't bother. I'm out of here, he said leaving.
Kate looked at him walking fast toward the building. He was really angry and she was really sorry about it. He was right. She should tell him but she didn't know where to start or how he would react. It wouldn't be easy but she had to try. Maybe he could even help her and that scare the hell out of her…..
Chapter 7 :The Price
Sawyer didn't go back to his room before 23h00. He really needed a drink but there was no bar around so he just walked and walked till he was tired of walking. His mood was better but he was still mad at Kate for hiding so many things from him. He was really surprise to find her awake sitting on her bed when he entered in the room. She looked really pale and her eyes were puffy. Sawyer felt all his anger leaving his body but didn't say anything. He lied on the bed, closing his eyes.
She just turned 19, she suddenly said, as if she was talking to herself.
What?
Megan. She just turned 19 two weeks ago.
Sawyer didn't understand why she was telling him that but something inside told him to shut his mouth and listen.
She's from California. She had a boyfriend there. A policeman. He was six years older then her and the son of an important lawyer. She told me she was happy with him for the first couple of month. Then he started to beat her. Not often, not too hard but just enough to scare her. And it worked. She stayed with him for almost a year, thinking she could change him. But of course, she was wrong. He became more violent, started to drink. She never told anyone, always finding excuses for her bruises. But one night, something bad happened. She was in the kitchen preparing diner like she did every single night. He arrived home angry as usual but also very drunk. He tried to hit her with the back of his hand because the diner wasn't ready yet She was slicing some vegetables. She didn't see him coming, so she jumped. But she had the knife in her hand. She stabbed him right here in the chest, right in the wrong place. She killed him. In fact, nobody cared that it was legitimate defence. Her stepfather was a rich and powerful lawyer. He had no problem to convince the judge that she was a murderer. They condemned her to 25 years in jail.
Sawyer was listening very carefully. He didn't know if she wanted him to say something or not.
Always tough justice was shit, he said not knowing what else he could say.
She didn't tell me how she landed here, she continued as if she didn't ear what he said. But believe it or not she's happy to be here. Do you know why? Because they can free her. If she's willing to participate to the new experimental program, they will not just free her, they will help her financially as long as she'll need it. She will not go to jail. She will have a second chance.
Something's telling me that this experimental thing of hers is not something she'll enjoy.
Kate smiled to herself. He was right. It was something serious. But it was nothing compared to freedom. It's amazing what your ready to do to have a second chance especially if you never tough you could have it.
It's not that bad, she lied.
What is it?
They want her to have a baby.
They want a baby? He repeated not believing they were only asking that.
They don't want the child. They just want her to have one and raise it. Remember when they captured Claire? They wanted to make test on her and the baby. But once Aaron was born, they didn't come back for him. But they will. Twice a year for more test till he's 18.
I don't see what's so terrible in that. Women have kids all the time, right?
Your right.
Kate stayed silent for few minutes. Sawyer knew there was something more.
What is it Kate?
What is it what?
What is it you're not telling me?
Kate looked at him straight in the eyes.
They stopped pushing the button.
Sawyer didn't understand instantly what she was talking about. The button. She was talking about the hatch on the island.
How the hell do you know that?
They told me.
What happened to the people on the island? he asked with more concern in his voice that he tough it would sound.
They said they're alright.
Great. Always knew that pushing that button was useless.
I'm afraid you're wrong. I don't know exactly what happened but it seemed that most of the equipment and machinery they have here are not working anymore.
They just have to repair it or buy new ones.
Come on Sawyer, you know it's not that simple. It takes a lot of time.
I tough we were talking about that friend of yours.
We are. Like I just said, because of what happened in the hatch, they can't use any kind of technology to help Megan to get pregnant. So, it let only one way for her to do it.
What is it? he asked not even bothering to think before asking.
How many natural ways to get a woman pregnant do you know Sawyer? she asked seriously.
Sawyer never felt so stupid. The girl needed a guy to do the job. Shit! Was she thinking about him this afternoon?
So, when she came to you this afternoon….he started enable to finish his sentence.
That's right. She asked me if she could ask you….
Jesus! But why she didn't ask me herself.
I guess she's shy.
Well, now I guess I should thank you Freckles, he said smiling softly.
I told you.
It's not that I have a problem with the sex part, he said grinning, but the daddy part doesn't tempt me so much.
Kate was not smiling. She was still sitting on the bed, her back resting on the wall, her eyes closed.
But what did you tell her to change her mind? He asked dreading a bit the answer.
I can't tell you that, she said shaking her head.
Why not? He asked, sitting next to her on the bed.
You're not gonna like it. I had to find something quick so I said the only thing that would ruined her chance.
Freckles….please…tell me you didn't tell her I was….gay?
Kate stayed silent for few second and hided her face in her arms.
I'm sorry, she whispered.
Sawyer couldn't believe that she said that but surprisingly he wasn't mad. She really seemed to be sorry.
Why did you lie to her? You know I would have said no, right?
I know.
So why did you lie?
Kate didn't want to answer that.
Please tell me Kate! he almost beg.
Kate stood up and walked toward the window with an empty look.
I lied because I didn't want her to tell you about all this. I didn't want her to ask you about me…
Kate saw the puzzle look on Sawyer's face.
I told you she was in my meeting didn't I? They offered me the same thing Sawyer. My freedom. Megan and I have the same price to pay.
Chapter 8: Our night
At first, Sawyer tough he didn't ear properly but with the sadness and despair he could read in her face, he knew it was the truth. What the hell am I suppose to do or say to her? he asked himself. Shit! He never tough they would offer her something like that. For sure, to have her freedom back was something crucial for Kate but was she ready to do so much for it? Just the tough of Kate having sex with a stranger made him feel sick. There's no way I'm gonna let her do that, he promised to himself.
Please say something, she said uncomfortable by his silence.
Sorry Freckles. I just don't know what to say, he replied truthfully.
It's ok. You don't have to say anything. I didn't say I would do it anyway.
That last sentence didn't make him feel better. He had the feeling she was only saying that to comfort him.
What's gonna happen if you don't do it? They cannot keep you here forever, right?
Right. They said they have nothing to gain by giving me to the FBI. They will still free me but I will have to be on the run like before, with no money, nowhere to go.
You could go to Jack, he said immediately regretting this stupid idea.
I don't think so. There's nothing he could do to help me. I'm so tired of running Sawyer, she said looking at him with tears all over her face.
Sawyer couldn't bear to see her like that. She was usually so strong and independent. Why was she giving up?
Come on Freckles, your tired he said sitting next to her, forcing her to lie down so he could lie next to her.
Kate immediately buried her face in his chest. He could now smell her hair and God he liked her smell!
I'm sorry, she mumbled between two sobs.
There's nothing to be sorry about. You don't have to take any decision now, right?
Kate didn't say anything but slightly nodded her head. She was glad she told him her secret. She was glad he was here with her, not judging or not trying to tell her what to do. She needed him to be by her side. He was usually such an ass but he could be so indispensable and lovely. Why can't he be like that more often? She could easily get use to it. I t was so nice and comforting to lie next to him.
They stayed like that for what seemed hours to Sawyer. It was almost tortured for him to feel her body against his without kissing her. She was so beautiful even when she cries. He couldn't stop caressing her hair. God, he wanted to kiss her so badly. Temptation was too hard for him anymore so he started to kiss her softly on her forehead, then behind her ears, down her neck. When he tough she would stop him, she raised her head up looking deeply in his eyes and kissed him. First, Sawyer was surprised by her kiss but he couldn't stop kissing her back. The kiss became more passionate and Kate was now caressing his hair and his back with her hands. Sawyer knew he had to stop this. She didn't have all her mind; she was tired and confused about everything that happened. God, why it had to be so complicated!
Kate, please, you don't know what you're doing, he said pushing her away slightly.
Wrong, I know exactly what I'm doing she replied softly in his ears.
She wasn't crying anymore but was breathing fast and deeply. Sawyer didn't know what to think anymore. He wanted her so much and he could have her just right now.
Hell Kate, what do you want from me, he asked kissing her again.
Everything you can give me, she said out of breath.
You're sure about that sweetheart?
Yeah…she answered taking his shirt off.
No regrets or reproaches tomorrow…..
I promise.
Sawyer didn't need more from her to lose his mind completely. She was all what he dreamed of for the last weeks and tonight she was all his. Just one night. He knew things would be different tomorrow but he didn't care right now. He would try to make that night difficult to forget. She was so different from all the other women he slept with, she was so much more. He wanted her to feel like that.
Sawyer wasn't the only one becoming crazy. Kate was totally lost in his arms, responding to his kisses and caresses. She didn't know exactly how it started but she didn't want him to stop. She couldn't remember feeling the way she was feeling with him. It was so good and so wrong in the same time, especially after what she told him tonight. But the only important thing for her right now was him being with her. She couldn't care less about the consequences. Tonight was their night. They made love three times that night, only resting for more kisses, never talking. Talking would be for tomorrow. Unfortunately, every good moment has an ending and they finally felt asleep around 4am in the morning. Nobody came in the room that morning. There were no questions for Sawyer today as if somebody knew he had better to do with his time.
Kate was the first one to open her eyes in the morning. She was still feeling tired but her entire body was relaxed. She tough she would feel guilty but she was not. She turned her head to look at Sawyer and was glad to see that he was still sleeping. It was really awkward to wake up naked next to him; it would be even more if he was awake. She decided to go for the shower. She needed to think and a long shower was what she wanted.
It's the noise of running water that woke him up. It took him a few minutes to remember all the events of last night. The best night he could ever remember. Now he was dreading her reaction. What was he suppose to tell her now? Was he supposed to say something about last night or pretend that nothing happen? Hell, it was confusing. Maybe the best thing to do was to wait to see her reaction. Sawyer put his clothes on and lied back on the bed waiting for her to finish her shower. God, he was nervous!
When Kate left the bathroom she was surprised to see that Sawyer was awake and especially dressed. She was really uncomfortable and wanted to say something to break the silence.
Morning… she said with a nervous smile.
Sawyer got up and walk toward her, kissing her slightly on her forehead.
Morning Freckles. Are you alright?
Yeah…
Right, my turn for the shower, he said.
He was about to close the door of the bathroom.
Sawyer? she asked.
Yeah?
Thanks.
Anytime Freckles…
I'll be at the canteen.
I'll meet you there.
They smile at each other for what seemed eternity, too shy to say anything else, then Sawyer close the door and Kate left for the canteen. She wasn't really hungry. She was feeling so weird. Sawyer was so weird. She never imagined he could be so sweet and concerned about her. Kate was really lost in her tough when someone touched her shoulder behind her.
I'm sorry miss, I think you dropped this, said a young girl holding out a piece of paper.
What? Oh thanks, she said taking it.
Kate took an eye on the paper. She was not smiling anymore. The only thing she could see now was that little message on the paper. The one Jack gave her. Ask him how she got the gun.
Chapter 9: Ask me
Sawyer never appreciated a shower so much. His mind was full of toughs and unfortunately there was one especially that he wasn't able to wash away. He didn't want to think about it but he had to know the truth. Kate. Did she really want to sleep with him or…did she just use him to get her freedom? Damn it! Why I didn't think about that before? he asked himself. But he already knew the answer. He was in love with her. He couldn't deny it. He didn't remember exactly when it happened but it was certainly a while ago, maybe after the first time she kissed him on the island or even earlier. Sawyer didn't like to admit it because he knew she was his weakness. She could hurt him so much without even knowing it.
Sawyer stayed in the shower for almost haft an hour just standing there, his face under the water. When he finally decided that it was enough, he wasn't feeling to meet Kate in the canteen anymore so he went outside near the beach. He wanted to be alone. He couldn't think properly when he was with her. Sawyer was only walking around for about 20 minutes when he saw her coming. Bloody beach! It was not big enough to escape from anybody, about 800m long and surrounded by cliffs on both side. Sawyer could see on her face that she wasn't happy to find him here.
What are you doing here? she simply asked
Sawyer immediately felt a huge wave of guilt invading his body. She was probably having a hard time too thinking about everything that happened.
You said you'll meet me in the canteen, she continued slowly looking at her feet.
Guess I changed my mind, he said looking at her.
Sawyer saw in her face that she was hurt and he immediately felt like the biggest jerk on earth.
Right, she simply said.
Then she turned around and was about to leave.
Kate, wait! he said grabbing one of her arm.
She stopped but didn't turn around to face him. She was waiting for him to say something. He gently pulled her arm, forcing her to face him. She was fiercely looking at him, trying hard not to cry. Sawyer hated himself to make her feel that way but he couldn't help it.
I'm sorry, he whispered. I just needed to think.
Sawyer didn't know what else he could say right now. There were so many things he wanted to tell her but he didn't know where to start and he was so scared.
Do you…regret it? Last night I mean…she asked shyly.
Regret? he repeated incredulously. Let me tell you one thing Freckles. There's a lot of things I think about last night but regret is not one of them you have my word.
Sawyer could swear he saw a smile on her face but it quickly disappeared.
What about you?
No regrets, I promised.
Don't make promises you can't keep.
I kept that one. It was great.
Great! Come on Freckles, it's impossible that I was "just" great, he said pretending to be offended.
Kate couldn't help laughing and it made him laugh too. It was very good to ear it.
You'll never change Sawyer, she said.
He didn't reply but it made him smile.
Let's go back inside. I'm sure your starving.
You sure know your man Freckles he said haft joking,
Then he took her hand in his and they went back to the entrance of the main building. They were surprised to see Mrs. Klugh waiting for them. She was rarely around unless there was a meeting or something important.
I'd like to speak to Miss Austen, she said talking to Sawyer.
He can stay I don't mind, Kate replied before he could say anything.
Are you sure about that? She asked as if she knew she would reply something like that.
Yeah.
So, you know why I'm here for.
I guess so.
Do you need more time?
It's not necessary. I'm not doing it.
At first, Sawyer didn't have a clue what they were talking about but he quickly realised what it was all about. Did he ear properly? She didn't want to do it? She wouldn't have her freedom back?
Are you sure about that?
Yeah, I'm sure.
No your not, Sawyer said suddenly interrupting them.
What? she said facing him.
Come on Freckles, you can't give up so quickly. Don't you want your freedom? I always tough you would do everything to have it back.
Not that.
Why not?
Mrs. Klugh was still standing next to them and was listening their conversation very carefully.
I guess I will leave you now. You know where to find me if you change your mind, she said talking to Kate.
Kate didn't reply but nodded her head and Mrs. Klugh left.
You didn't answer my question Freckles.
Kate didn't want to have that kind of conversation with Sawyer in public so she headed for their room and he followed her.
Kate was quite embarrassed but she had to say something.
I'm not like you Sawyer. I can't sleep with someone I don't like.
That revelation made him feel so good. At least, it meant she likes him.
Then choose someone you like.
I don't know any man here but you.
Do you like me?
What? she asked confused.
I said do you like me?
Kate didn't answer immediately. Of course she liked him but to admit it was not so easy. She was blushing.
Yeah, I do.
Why the hell you don't ask me to do it then?
There were a million of reasons why she didn't ask him. Of course, he was the first and only man she tough about but something inside her tells her that it is too dangerous. Her feelings for him were too unsure, too wild.
I can't ask you that, she replied still blushing.
Why not? he asked, raising her head with his hand in the same time so she would look at him.
I don't know….it just doesn't sound….right…
Come on Freckles, you want to stop running don't you?
Why would you do that Sawyer?
Do I really need a reason? he said uncomfortable. Maybe I just want to help you.
Kate knew he wasn't saying all the truth but his offer was really tempting. She already knew that he was awesome in bed but what would happen after that? What was his real reason to do it?
Sawyer knew she was having a hard time taking a decision. He didn't want to lose that chance of getting closer to her. It was his chance to tell her his feelings without words, his chance to win her heart. Sawyer was so lost in his tough that he didn't realise at first when she put her arms around his neck and rested her hear on his chest. She was hugging him really hard.
Everything will be alright Freckles, I promise he whispered in her ear hugging her back.
She didn't say anything but slowly raised her head and kissed him.
Chapter 10: The question
Kate had to admit it. It's been the happiest week she could remember. Sawyer was unrecognizable and so thoughtful. It was so good to wake up next to him in the morning and to spend hours and hours in bed. She could easily get use to it, she had to be careful. It was amazing the way he could just lied there, looking at her for hours as if she was the most precious thing in the world. She also loved to look at him, especially when he didn't notice it. She already knew that he had a splendid body but to have the opportunity to touch and explore it as much as she wanted was a pure pleasure. And she knew he loved it so much.
When Sawyer woke up that morning he was disappointed to see that Kate was not in the room and it made him a bit in a bad mood. He loved to shower with her in the morning but obviously he'll have to do it alone this morning. For him too it's been an amazing week. He never tough he could ever feel that way for a women and god knows that he had a lot of women in his life. With Kate everything was different; the way she smiled at him, her scent, her look. He was doing his best so she would never forget that week. Unfortunately, there was something that was bothering him. What's gonna happen when she'll get pregnant? Will she want to keep his relation with him or will they come back to what it was before? And what's gonna happen when they'll go back in the real word? So many questions…Sawyer knew he could not bear that, not after the last week they spent together. He must convince her that they are made for each other.
Sawyer left the bathroom and forgot everything about his morning disappointment when he saw Kate sitting on the bed with a smile on her face.
Morning Freckles, you just missed the opportunity to admire my body he said grinning, sitting slowly next to her.
I'm sure I will have many others, she replied lying on the bed to kiss him.
You seem to be pretty sure about that, he said after he kissed her back.
I am.
So, what was so important this morning? he asked trying to hide his curiosity.
Nothing important, just a meeting with you know who.
Sawyer didn't like the way she was trying to hide the importance of that meeting. If there was one thing he hated about Kate, it was the secrets she was always trying to keep from him. He wanted to share everything with her…well, almost everything.
Why you didn't tell me anything about that meeting yesterday? he tried, pushing his luck.
I forgot, it's no big deal. I'm sorry alright?
I'll forgive you if you tell me what it really was about.
Why do you always want to know everything? she asked defensively.
Maybe because you're always fucking trying to hide stuff from me, he said getting pissed.
I'll guess it's something we have in common.
What's that suppose to mean?
Come on Sawyer, don't tell me you don't have any secret.
I never said I don't have any. But if you ask, I'll tell you, he said defiantly.
You will answer any question just to know what was my meeting for?
Shoot.
Alright. Tell me how she got your gun? she asked.
What? he said not understanding what she was talking about.
Ana-Lucia. How did she manage to steel the gun you kept so preciously from everybody?
Sawyer taught he didn't ear properly. Why on hell did she want to know that? Jack. Did he tell her something? The son of a bitch!
You can ask everything you want and this is your question?
It is.
Can I ask why?
Why not? I'm curious.
Its Jack isn't it?
What?
Don't try to protect him. Did he tell you something about that?
Just to ask you how she got the gun.
That's all.
That's all. Are you going to tell me? she asked almost pleading.
Sawyer didn't know what to do anymore. He couldn't lie to her, she would know. But telling the truth was not an easy option. She would be really mad with him. Everything was going so well and now it was like hell.
Alright Freckles. I'll tell you the truth but only if you swear to listen to everything I have to say.
Ok, she said sitting on the edge of the bed.
It was the day you went on your little romantic trip in the jungle with the Doc remember?
There was nothing romantic. We were looking for Michael.
Well, it's not the way I saw it right?
Right. Keep going.
Well, the thing is that I was quite in a bad mood that day. My arm was still hurting like hell, I was trying to pick fruits, you were gone with Jacko and that bloody women was following me all day trying to convince me to give her my gun.
Witch you didn't, she guessed.
Right. There's no way on hell I would give her my gun willingly. I guess she got pissed with me and she jumped on me.
You mean, she attacked you?
Well, you could say that, he said reluctant to elaborate.
What did you do?
I fought back, what do you think? Then she kissed me.
She kissed you? she repeated incredulously.
Yeah.
And what did you do?
I kissed her back, he said with a painful look that was telling so much more then words.
Sawyer stayed silent for a minute and that silence was telling so much more.
You slept with her didn't you? she asked avoiding his eyes.
I think the word fuck would be more appropriate.
Kate didn't say anything. She was still sitting on the bed with her arms around her legs. Sawyer knew she was hurt but there's nothing he could do about it.
Did you like her?
Did I like her? Come on Freckles, you know I couldn't stand the women. She was a pain in the ass.
So why did you? she almost yell, tears running on her check.
Why do I need a reason? It didn't ask for it, it just happened. Don't tell me that nothing happened between you and the Doc all alone in the jungle.
Not that day!
Kate knew immediately that she did a mistake. She could see in his face that it really hurt him and that he was starting to loose control.
What's that suppose to mean?
Kate didn't want to answer. He was angry enough.
I asked you a question!
We never had sex if it's what you want to know.
Sawyer was relief with this affirmation but he knew there was something more she was not telling him.
But…., he continued for her.
We kissed once.
When?
It doesn't matter when Sawyer.
It matters to me.
Fine. We kissed the day Eko brought you back to camp! Happy?
Before or after you knew I was back?
After, she whispered.
And who kissed who?
What do you mean who kissed who?
You kissed him or he kissed you? he asked getting impatient.
I don't see what difference it makes. It was just a kiss, she said now really uncomfortable.
Believe me, there is a very big difference!
Alright then, I kissed him and you know what? I'm not sorry about it because it was a great kiss! Who the hell are you to judge me? You left without even saying goodbye, not caring about anybody else but yourself. I taught I would never see you again and there you are a couple of days later between life and death, delirious. I was so confused…Like you said, it just happened, I didn't plan it.
Sawyer didn't know what to say anymore. She was right. Who was he to judge her actions when his own were even worse? Could she ever forgive him?
Kate,…I.., he started.
Don't bother Sawyer. It's not as if we were a real couple anyway. You can sleep with as many women as you want it's not my business anymore. You're free.
What do you mean?
You wanted to know what was my meeting for? I had a pregnancy test and it's positive.
Sawyer didn't even have the time to realize what she said that she was already gone.
Chapter 11: Hell
Kate tough she could never cry anymore. Her eyes were red and all puffy. It was now three days that she and Sawyer had that fight and she hasn't seen him since. She slept the last three nights in Meg's room and didn't want to leave it. In fact, she didn't want to do anything. She barely moved from the bed.
Come on Kate, you have to eat something, tried Meg vainly.
I'm not hungry. I'll eat later, she lied, her head still on the pillow.
You can't hide here forever. Why don't you go and talk to him.
No. I have nothing to tell him.
You know it's not true. I know you missed him.
I don't
So why are you crying 24h/7?
I'm not.
Yes you are! Well, if you don't go, I'll!
That sentence had the desire effect. Kate sat up quickly on the bed.
No you don't!
Well, I give you 15 minutes for a shower and I want you to leave that room and not to come back before you talk him or I swear I'll do it for you.
Kate knew she was telling the truth. She might just be a teenager but she had guts and she was a wonderful listener. Kate stand up slowly with a furious look in her face.
That's a good girl, she said almost laughing.
I'm not a good girl.
Don't forget. 15 minutes!
Kate wasn't feeling well at all for a conversation with Sawyer. In fact, she wasn't feeling very well. She was weak and a bit dizzy probably because she didn't have much appetite lately. She showered quickly, got dress and left the room before Meg had time to say something. She walked slowly toward the canteen a bit uncomfortable with the idea to pass Sawyer. But she didn't see him. She was relief and disappointed in the same time. She really missed him. She didn't know what to think anymore about their fight. Was he still angry? And why the hell would he be angry? He's the one who slept with another woman. Of course, it made her really upset when he told her about Ana-Lucia. But the past is the past. Could she trust him again?
What do you want? a lady asked her with a smile.
Kate was lost in her tough and didn't even notice that she was in the queue for the breakfast. She wasn't hungry at all. The smell of the food wasn't tempting either. Worse, she was now feeling sick.
Are you alright miss, asked the same lady, concerned with the fact that Kate's face was turning white
Kate didn't have time to answer before she passed out.
It was a bad morning for Sawyer too. He had a horrible hangover. He finally found a way to get some bottle of whisky three nights ago and he unfortunately drank an entire bottle every night since then. He knew alcohol wasn't a long term solution to his pain but if it could just make him forget a little it was worth trying it. And now he was suffering even more. His head was hurting like hell. He was about to fall asleep again when he heard a loud bang on the door.
Damned it! Go to hell whoever it is!
Sawyer! Open the door now! someone yelled behind the door.
I'm fucking sleeping, he yelled back.
Sawyer, please! It's Kate. She is in the hospital wing.
Sawyer didn't need more information to open the door as quickly as he could. It was Meg, Kate's friend.
What happened to her?
I don't know. She passed out in the canteen.
Where is she?
Second floor, room 12. You'll need this, she said giving him a small key.
What for?
The elevator.
Right, he just said before leaving for the elevator.
Hey Sawyer!
What? he asked impatiently turning around.
She walked closer to him.
She needs you. Take good care of her.
Sawyer didn't know what to say but Meg was already gone before he had time to say something.
What the hell did you do Freckles, he asked himself on his way to the second floor.
Unfortunately for him, as soon as the door of the elevator opened, there was someone waiting for him.
Great, you again.
Good morning too M. Ford, said Mrs. Klugh as if Sawyer greeted her first.
Yeah.
I'm guessing you're here for Miss Austen.
Is she alright, he asked with a lot of concerned in his voice.
For a pregnant woman who barely drink or eat for almost 72 hours I would say she's not too bad. She was very lucky M. Ford.
Why did she stop to eat?
It's exactly the question I wanted to ask you.
Sawyer didn't like the way the conversation was going.
Well, I haven't seen Kate in the last few days so how the hell I'm I suppose to know why she decided to do that.
And why did you stop seeing her?
It's kind of personal, he said roughly.
She was looking at him very seriously.
I will tell you something very important M. Ford and I want you to listen carefully because I'm not going to say it twice. As the father of her child you have responsibilities. The baby could have died. I don't want you to tell me what happened between you but what I want, it's that you promise me that it will never happened again. She needs your support and if you can't do that, we have a problem and as you know M. Ford, I don't like problems.
Sawyer didn't like how she was talking to him as if she was blaming him for what happened. His jaw was tense and he could have killed her just with his look. But she was no women to be impressed so easily.
Kate is still sleeping. I suggest you go see her. Goodbye M. Ford.
Sawyer didn't reply and he immediately looked for Kate's room. What he saw when he entered the room almost made him sick. She was lying in a bed surrounded by tubes and machines and she looked so vulnerable. He approached slowly and took one of her hand in his.
Hey Freckles, it's me, he said.
Kate didn't have any reaction. Sawyer was feeling a bit stupid to keep talking but there was so many things he wanted to tell her that maybe it would be easier if she was asleep.
I don't know for you Freckles but, the last days didn't go very well for me. I guess it was about the same for you. I don't like it, you and me not talking. You and me, we had a great time…well, for me it was. I know I screw it up and I'm….I'm….I'm so sorry Freckles!
Sawyer had a hard time trying not to cry. He sat gently next to her on the bed, caressing her hair with his free hand.
I just want another chance right? I promise I won't screw things up.
Emotions were now too strong for Sawyer to bear. He had to leave. He kissed her quickly on her forehead.
I'll see you later ok?
Sawyer turned around and left the room quickly. So quickly that he didn't notice that Kate's eyes were opened.
Chapter 12: Who are you?
Darkness. Everything was dark and there was no sound at all. Kate was walking slowly, without knowing where she was or where she was going. There was nothing in front of her, nothing behind her. She was all alone.
Hello? Is there someone here? she yelled.
But no sound came out from her mouth. She couldn't say a word. Kate was getting scared. She tried to speak once more but with the same result. Where am I? she asked herself. Where is everybody? What is this place? She started to run. She ran and ran for a very long time but there was still nothing all around her. Something weird; she wasn't even getting tired. She was panicking, tears running down her cheeks. She stopped running and sat on the ground still crying. Then she heard a noise.
Are you alright? a small voice asked just in front of her.
Kate was surprised to see a little girl standing in front of her. She was wearing a pink pyjama with slippers and had a doll in her hands. She had beautiful blue eyes and curly brown hair. She didn't seem to be scared at all.
Who are you? asked Kate with curiosity.
I don't know my name yet, the little girl answer looking at her doll.
How don't you have a name?
My parents haven't chosen it yet. Do you want to pick one for me?
You want me to choose a name for you?
The little girl nodded.
You don't have to decide it now you know.
Where are your parents?
My daddy is coming very soon.
Where is your mom?
The little girl smiled at Kate and slowly walked away.
Wait, where are you going?
Where do you want to go? asked the little girl.
Kate was thinking. Where do I want to go? that was a very good question.
I don't know. I don't remember how I came here in the first place. How did you come here? asked Kate.
I followed you.
You followed me. How is it possible?
The little girl was giggling.
How old are you? asked Kate.
I'm very young. I'm not 11 yet, she said smiling.
Kate tough the little girl was not telling the truth. She was so little, she couldn't be more then 7 or 8 years old.
What do you do here all alone?
I'm not alone. I'm with you. And daddy is coming soon.
Who's your daddy?
Oh he's really great! He's the best dad in the world, she said really enthusiastic.
What about your mom?
She's great too. Dad loved her very much.
She's a lucky woman.
Kate had a strange feeling that she was missing something very important. Who was that little girl? Where were they? Kate was really confused. She was trying really hard to remember how she arrived here.
Are you alright? asked the little girl again.
I'm fine. Just trying to remember how I came here in the first place.
Everything is ok. Daddy will help you.
Do I know him?
Who? My dad? Of course you know him. I wouldn't be here if you didn't. He's coming right now, she said with a big smile in her face.
She took Kate's hand in hers and Kate's memory came back; the plane crash, the island, the survivors ,the others, the way they have been captured by them, Jack leaving them and… there was still something missing…him….who was he? There was something special about him, something very strong. Then she heard a voice, comforting voice. Someone was talking to her but she couldn't pick what it was saying.
You can ear him right?
Yes, I do. Who is it? asked Kate.
It's my dad.
What is he saying?
He said he's sorry.
Sorry about what?
About what he did to you.
And what did he do to me?
He made you sad and he hates it when you're sad. So do I. He wants you to forgive him. Will you?
Kate didn't understand what was going on. She didn't understand what the little girl was talking about. But something inside her told her that she should trust her.
And you, would you forgive him if you were me? asked Kate kneeling down so she could look at her in her eyes.
Yeah, I would, she replied sincerely.
And why?
Because I believe everybody deserves a second chance, don't you?
I guess your right, answered Kate smiling at her.
The little girl was grinning.
- You must go now, said the little girl.
Where?
Where you belongs. You can't stay here forever.
Kate was afraid to leave the little girl alone. She had something really special but couldn't find what.
Will I see you again? asked Kate.
Of course.
When?
The little girl smile again and walked toward her. The darkness was now gone, replace by a warm light lighting up the place.
I told you. I'm not 11 days old yet, she said touching slightly Kate's belly. Don't you forget my name right?
Kate didn't have time to think about what the little girl said. She didn't even have time to say goodbye before the light was so blinding she couldn't see anything. But she could still ear the voice so she walked in that direction. She knew that voice. She liked it so much. It was his voice. Sawyer's voice. Then she opened her eyes.
Chapter 13 Peace
When Kate opened her eyes, there was nobody in the room with her. Where was he? The voice she eared, Sawyer's voice. He wasn't here. Maybe she just imagined all of it. But it seemed so real, she could still feel that little girl's hand on her tummy. It couldn't be just a dream. Did he really come here to apologize? She wanted to see him right now. She wanted to tell him about her dream.
I'm glad to see you're awake, said a voice near the door.
It was Alex. It was a long time Kate hasn't sees her. She was rarely on the ground floor.
Hi, Kate said.
Are you alright?
That sentence. The same question the little girl asked her twice. It made her smile.
Yeah, I'm fine. Just had a very weird dream.
It happened sometimes. Would you like something to eat?
Kate wasn't really hungry but she knew she had to eat something if she wanted to get out of that room. Alex gave her some toast and cereal and she ate all of it. She was still standing by the door as if she wanted to say something before leaving. But she didn't say anything. She took Kate's plate and left the room without another word.
Kate didn't want to stay in that room any longer but she had to wait three hours before the doctor could examine her. He wanted her to stay one more night but she convinced him that she was fine. She got up and put her clothes on. There were a lot of people in the hallway but nobody seemed to pay attention to her. Kate didn't know where she was. It was the first time she came here. She found the elevator but didn't have the key to use it. Fortunately, someone arrived just after her with a key and offered her to go down. She wanted to find Sawyer so badly. She first went to his room and knocked on the door. Kate was really shocked when she saw a tall blonde girl in pyjama opening the door.
Yes, can I help you? she asked Kate.
Kate couldn't believe it. There was a woman in their room. How could he do that? Kate looked at her in disbelief. She couldn't say anything so she ran away. She ran to the beach till she couldn't breathe anymore. She was trying to catch her breathe when she saw him running toward her.
Kate, what are you doing here? Are you ok? he asked with concerned.
No I'm not ok!
He tried to move forward to touch her but she didn't let him do.
Don't touch me!
Sawyer was really shocked by her reaction. He had something important to tell her but it would have to wait. Obviously, she was very upset about something. Was it possible that she was still mad at him about their fight? He didn't know what to say so he just stand there waiting for her to calm down. But Kate was not near to calm down. She was too upset.
She said I should forgive you, that you deserved a second chance. I wanted to trust her.
Who are you talking about?
It doesn't matter. Who is she?
Who is who? he asked really confused.
The blonde girl in our room.
I don't know who you're talking about Freckles but I'm pretty sure there's no blonde girl in our room because I just left it five minutes ago.
Don't lie to me Sawyer.
I'm not lying but I think there's something you should see, he said in a calm voice taking out something in his pocket.
It was a key.
What's that for?
It's the key of our new room Freckles. They gave it to me a couple of hours ago. Can't wait for you to see it.
Kate looked at him incredulously.
You mean, we have a new room?
Yeah.
Why?
Because I asked for it.
Kate was quite embarrassed.
So, the girl I saw…
I guess it's her room now, he said putting his arm around her.
This time, she let him do and it was so nice. She started to cry.
I'm sorry, she said.
Don't. I'm the one who should apologize.
But you already did.
Your eared me?
Kind of, she said smiling.
Do I deserve my second chance?
She smiled and kissed him.
I'll take this as a yes, he said smiling back.
I missed you, she whispered in his ear.
Hell, I missed you too Freckles.
What about you show me this new room? She said with a mocking looked.
It will be a pleasure. I'm sure you will like the bed, he said grinning.
And it was true. The room was much bigger then the first one and they have a double bed rather then twin ones. They spent most of the next days in their new room.
Hey Freckles, he asked one morning while they were lying lazily in their bed.
Yes?
If it's a boy, he started touching her belly.
It's not a boy, she said.
How do you know?
I just know, trust me, she said smiling.
So it's a girl, your sure about that?
Yes, I'm sure. A very special girl.
Any idea for a name? he asked.
I don't know yet. We don't have to decide now.
You know Freckles, he said nervously sitting on the bed.
What is it? She asked sitting next to him.
What's gonna happen when we'll go back to the real word? he asked unsure.
What do you mean exactly?
I mean…you and I…and the baby.
I guess it depends on what you want, she said in a low voice.
What I want? he repeated.
The only thing Sawyer wanted was to be with her. He couldn't imagine his life without Kate anymore. It was a massive change for him. He never has been in a serious relationship with a woman before and it was really scaring him.
I know what I want, he said looking at her.
What is it? she asked almost whispering.
I just want to be with you. I love waking up next to you in the morning, I love the smell of your hair, I love the way you laugh, I love….I love you Kate.
Kate wasn't expecting that. She felt a huge wave of happiness in her entire body. She smiled at him.
I love you too.
These four little words were enough to make him the happiest man in the world.
THE END
