Hello all! Wow, I am terrible at updating on FFN. Apologies! I swear I have the next six chapters loaded into the Doc Manager. But I clean forgot for 4 whole months that I did the hard work already. All I have to do is publish this stuff. Oof. If it ever goes that long, just leave me a comment reminding me every two weeks and I promise the chapters will start coming out every two weeks.


Chapter 8: Fear the Deer


When Catherine's footsteps retreated, Parvati let go of the breath she had been holding.

She was back. She had made it.

Time for some self-care.

She threw open all the windows. On the balcony, she breathed in the scent of pine. The clouds moving over the moon cast their shadows over the great courtyard expanse, so she couldn't see what lay between her building and the residential complex across, only that it was twice as tall, with winking flame dot flickers in the windows.

To the right of her balcony was Manuela's. How delightful! They could just come out and chat right here, be it evening or morning or night. How much fun, how much more intimate! After all, everything was different in the moonlight or a morning breeze. There was only so much that could be said in the stale walls of an office. Or maybe they'd listen in on someone else talking, in an upstairs or downstairs balcony, lounging in the intimate moments of unseen strangers.

Back in her apartment, she dropped her cloak onto the back of one of the chairs. The apartment was cooling down rather quickly. It would make for easy sleeping tonight. She had her work cut out for her though. The walls were still blank, and the floor was cluttered with boxes and suitcases. The parakeets were chirping way past their bedtime. She put a cloth over them, shushing them, then wandered to the kitchen.

This kitchen was a marvel, so much wider than the one in her Enbarr apartment. And much bigger, actually. Despite making professor in Enbarr, she had never moved out of her grad student apartment. She was hardly ever home anyway, so the narrow space in the kitchen didn't matter much. Or, at least, that was what Parvati had believed. She put her hands on her hips, appraising it. Now that she had this kind of kitchen, she realized, maybe she wouldn't have resorted to the cafeteria all those years.

And now for the true test: she turned on the tap and felt a rush of relief. The hot water was actually working…unlike her kitchen in Enbarr. Dear gods! Did she live like a pleb? All those years! So entrenched was she, overloaded with professorship and businesses, she hadn't stopped to make such basic changes. This stuff was adulting, and being responsible was no fun.

Whatever. Parvati was being responsible! Tonight, she would finally wipe down every flat surface and counter in her apartment with a soapy towel. It was a cathartic ritual. Any new place she would leave in would need to be hand-scrubbed. Anointed, in a sense. As she acquired the things she needed and started wiping from the counters in the kitchen, her thoughts meandered. So much had happened already at Garreg Mach. She hadn't yet taken it in.

First, she had been greeted by Catherine Thunderbrand. She flashed into Parvati's head: Catherine, at the staircase, returning Parvati's mock bow — "Ladies first." And then there was Shamir Nevrand.

Hmm, thought Parvati. How astounding. The very first people she met. The Officer's Academy truly was full of the best of the best, and even amongst the best, she was sent the bestest.

Parvati smiled. She had had a waiting party. Wow! There was no one awaiting her the last few times she had moved. Granted, this was partially because she no longer had parents. But she didn't make this a grave concern; she had always had the company of whomever she was currently dating. How better to showcase to her how strong they were, and how helpful, and how organized?

And how better to bask in her lavished attention?

But these thoughts left her searching for something throughout her apartment.

No Randolph. Parvati sighed.

She made quick work of the rest of the kitchen counters and moved on to the dining table. She started to move the bird cage. It rattled horribly as it scraped over the table. Her heart jumped into her throat. She froze, embarrassed, hoping nobody else heard.

They had, of course. So had the parakeets. They squawked and complained about the night interruption. The cage filled with their wing flaps. Parvati shushed them, and this time, lifted the cage, placing it daintily back down on one of the chairs next to the table. Then she started polishing the table.

Well, what else had happened? She'd met the Viceroy, met the Archbishop. Discovered the Agarthan Museum was delayed. Parvati itched her nose, leaving a series of soap suds on her face as she wondered if it was all right to follow up on next steps… Would it be annoying to Seteth? Was it too early for an update? Or a timeline? Or should she take initiative? Present him some builders…? A niggling feeling was building up in her stomach. Would she just be annoying?

Parvati reprimanded herself. Patience, Parvati, she thought. There was no rush. She was going to be here for — years, ideally — when Seteth renewed her contract. If he renewed her contract. She hoped he would renew her contract. This was a silly time to be worrying about that anyway. The school year hadn't even started yet! But her heart went back to fluttering with anxiety.

Seteth was terrifying. She didn't know why. He was way more terrifying than any of her former bosses, or professors, or the dean. Or, anybody, really. Professor Hanneman was supposed to be good friends with him. She'd better speak to Hanneman, and verify Seteth was just another human being. She was certain Hanneman would reassure her.

But maybe he would just validate that the Viceroy was intimidating.

Parvati went back to the kitchen and washed her towel. Gray dust clumps and coiled rings of her long white hair, which were accumulating on the floor already, flushed away in the hot water. She returned to the table and crawled underneath, running the towel above her head on the underside, and up and down each of its legs, thinking. Four high-ranking people. Seteth, Catherine, Lady Rhea and Shamir. All of them terrifying. Well…now, about Catherine, Parvati was starting to have mixed feelings. Shamir, on the other hand…

Parvati's hand drifted up to her neck, leaving a line of soap suds where Shamir's knife had been, thinking. She wouldn't mind if she never saw Shamir again.

Parvati wiped the soap suds with her sleeve. Randolph didn't like Shamir either. Hmm.

Whatever. And then there was Manuela. A large smile took over Parvati's face as she clambered out from underneath the table and promptly hit her head.

"Owwww!" she groaned, flapping down onto the ground in unexpected defeat. She mewled.Well, at least Catherine didn't see this, said a voice in her head. Or Shamir. Or Seteth. Or Manuela. …Thank the gods! She nursed the offended spot on her head, and her dignity, as she continued to make mewling noises in the comfort and privacy of her own apartment.

When she finished licking her wounds, Parvati attended to every inch of every chair, running a new towel up and down cylindrical chair legs and the frame of the chair back, softly humming Manuela's songs. It was nice to have something her fingers could wrap themselves around. Something solid. Something to hold onto. There wasn't much she felt she was holding onto right now.

When all the wiping was done, she turned her attention to Hanneman's books. This bookshelf…she needed to make space. Because books were holy in the culture of Hinduskar, and thus were not to touch the ground, Parvati stacked his books in the corner over a clean towel. Then, Parvati wiped down the bookshelf as far as she could reach without needing a chair. The chair she would move tomorrow. She didn't want to make any more scraping noises at this time of night. Not after the bird cage. Dimitri and Dedue would have no problem reaching the top shelves though.

Parvati paused and frowned. Where in the world had that thought come from? The Prince of Faerghus, wiping her shelf! She returned to the kitchen, shaking her head. What a bizarre, errant thought to have. Though, when she pictured his bright eyes and today's willingness to help — bringing back her lesson plans, carrying her up the mountain… Parvati blinked. Something told her he wouldn't mind wiping down some shelves.

What a goof.

Now that the cold air had freshened the apartment, it felt good to stand at the sink and let her fingers bask in the hot water as she cleaned the towel again. She kept thinking about the Prince.

Bah. Cute kid. Very earnest, and genuine. And oblivious. And enthusiastic. It seemed Dedue got all of the brains, though. And he watched over Dimitri like a big brother…not just a vassal. She felt a twinge in her heart. It was kind of sweet. If those two were always together, then it meant they were never lonely.

Parvati cut off the tap water. It was the end of sound. There was a bit of a whistle of the wind outside, and the soft sound of one of the birds snoring but…

No Randolph.

Parvati sighed. There was that soft ache in her heart she was always shoving away. She was always throwing herself into the cerebral — thoughts, reflections, plans, even worries — to keep the gnawing hole in her heart at bay. Even more so now that she had been sensing something she hadn't yet put into words: that it was growing.

So, how did that happen? How did a child of royalty wind up so easy to get along with? She had been so afraid this whole day… But now, now she could think back to what happened and reassess.

It hadn't been terrible. He was a pushy little brat, but…but the question remained. How did this child of royalty get along so easily with a commoner like her? She saw in her mind's eye reading aloud the pamphlet aloud again. He didn't act like a prince. She'd had a distinct idea of nobles. She'd thought they were all like Duke Aegir. There was a certain protocol, like a dance. Dedue seemed to get it. He understood the protocol. But it seemed Dimitri didn't. Dimitri pouted at Dedue. And he didn't always get his way.

"Hmmmmmm," intoned Parvati aloud. She sighed, wringing water out of the towel and slapping water out for a bit, like her mom used to, before finally putting it to dry along the wall. Prince Dimitri didn't act like royalty. He acted like a commoner.

She closed the windows again. Time to start unpacking. Time to put things on the walls. She ran Aegir lights all around the living room, annoyed by the puttering nature of the lamps she had lit when she first came in. As her hands rifled through the contents of her suitcase again, her thoughts went back to Aelfric. What happened to him? She knew Catherine said don't count on him, but…

Parvati looked at what her hands had landed on. It was the elephant-headed god. The golden miniature looked like it had a ruby studded into its crown. It was a small, cute, almost flat piece, with four arms. Not even as long as her pinky. Well, since she found it, she might as well…

She started to unpack all her deities from her trunk, setting the statues and figurines on the table as she wondered where she'd set the shrine. With every god and goddess she placed upon the table, she would touch their feet with her right hand, asking for their blessings. Then, she would pass that hand up to her forehead and run it up the middle part in her hair.

This act immediately brought her calm, every single day. She didn't know why, but thinking about Aelfric had started making her anxious again. Like she had to worry for him. Not about him. For him. She didn't even know that weirdo.

And for Dedue, said a voice in her head. She was worrying for Dedue. Still worrying.

Parvati shoved away that line of thoughts as well. She couldn't handle thinking of him. Not right now. Too many…thoughts. Too many…emotions. Too many…everything. Maybe some other time. Maybe tomorrow. But not right now. Right now, every time Parvati's thoughts ever came to him, her heart would jump. It would take her a while to realize she wasn't worrying for him. She was worrying about him. He was so big. He was so scary. He didn't smile. He barely said anything.

Did he hate her?

No, you idiot. He even laughed at something you said, said a voice in her head. The voice of reason.

She couldn't remember what it was at this point, though, that made him laugh. All that kept coming back to her again and again was:

But — did he hate her?

So now Parvati reached for the elephant-headed god. Ganesh, the God of Trials. Or rather, the God from which to ask for the strength to overcome the trials. She cradled Ganesh in the palm of her right hand and held him close to her heart, silently praying.

In this year, there would be many trials. She was going to need all the help she could get!


When Dimitri awoke the next morning, it was because of the knocking on his door. This was unusual. The castle attendants knew better than to wake the Prince. Dedue knew better than to wake the Prince. The whole of Fhirdiad, the capitol of Faerghus, knew better than to wake the Prince. The thought was simply outrageous. So when the knocking did not cease, Dimitri turned over in his bed growling, "Not now."

He had been Actually Sleeping. For Dimitri, Actually Sleeping was a coveted state. It took him hours and days to get there. The journey usually started with staring at his ceiling for forty minutes. Then he would get mad at himself, thinking, he had a very important day tomorrow, and it would be good for him to be rested so he could do well the next day. Then he would start getting even more mad, thinking, if he didn't perform well the next day, he would wind up back here, lying awake, thinking about what a miserable failure he was the next night too. The fact that he would return to this very same state of self-torture in less than twenty-four hours was unbearable.

This was usually the time he would start to get hungry. But then he would spend half an hour wondering, should he eat something? But if he got up to eat something, wouldn't that make him more awake again? But if he didn't eat, what if he just kept being hungry? Would he be unable to sleep?

Hence, insomniac that he was, if his was ever interrupted, he would come out of Actual Sleep in a murderous rage. The citizens of Fhirdiad had heard many a report about walls being punched into the next room. The Fhirdiad Gazette informed Kingdom citizens that the Prince had been moved to the North Tower in an attempt to curb any further damage. The tower had no adjacent rooms to punch holes into. Or hallways. It was just rooms with a staircase spiraling up. Less collateral damage.

The plan didn't work though, because then came the Flying Dresser Incident. Two weeks later, the Fhirdiad Gazette informed Kingdom citizens that the North Tower was now a No Fly Zone. Ever since the Prince came out onto his balcony and launched his dresser at a noisy pegasus (and its unfortunate rider), it had been deemed a health risk to exist within that air space. And once the Prince disappeared into the North Tower for the night, the Gazette suggested submitted that the whole world become a No Walk Zone, No Talk Zone, No Make Noise Zone, and No Breathe Zone for all living things within Fhirdiad.

There is, of course, very little truth to this, according to the Royal Administration. After all, His Highness had been removed from the North Tower the moment his security detail's chief's wife discovered that the trashy tabloid had, for the first time ever, gotten something right: the location of the Prince's sleeping quarters.

The Fhirdiad Gazette maintained that it reported true facts by then revealing the shambled remains of the Prince's dresser. It also immediately mass-printed a detailed list of all its contents, including the number of stripes on each of his undergarments.

The dresser was confiscated.

Needless to say, no one awoke the Prince of Faerghus. Not Dedue. Not his attendants. Not the men of his battalions. Not even his parents when he had them. No one.

So it was a bit of a surprise that someone was still knocking.

Dimitri pulled the pillow out from under his head, realized he did not recognize this pillow, realized this wasn't his pillow from Fhirdiad, realized he wasn't in Fhirdiad — then mashed his face into this hard, new, unnatural bed and wrapped the pillow over his head, pressing them in around his ears. It then occurred to Dimitri that the knocking was coming from outside. Maybe someone hammering something.

Whyyyy… Dimitri thought to himself.

Whhhhyyyyyy… Dimitri wept in his head.

"WHHHHYYYYYY!" Dimitri screamed in his bed.

The knocking stopped abruptly. Dimitri breathed a sigh of relief. His constricted muscles relaxed and he buried himself deeper into his blue quilt. This dorm room had no curtains, so the quilt was the only thing keeping the blazing light in the windows from landing upon his face. He curled again into the warmth of his bed, filling his blanket cave with his breath to warm it as the cold dawn air was sweeping in —

Why was it so cold in here?

Dimitri opened his bleary eyes, pulled the quilt under his chin and squinted into the light. There was a girl standing at his window. He blinked a few times, slowly. She still had her face pressed against the window, staring. Dimitri was in no condition to be looked at by girls. He came to the conclusion that he must still be dreaming, turned over and put his pillow back over his face.

He was hiding. He told himself that he was trying to go back to sleep, but he was hiding. After a couple moments, he looked back again.

She was still there, a black silhouette against the yellow of the blazing sun, rapping his window. So that's who it was. Her small, gold hoop earring glinted against her short, dark hair as she was doing something at his window, her tongue sticking out in concentration. She looked into Dimitri's room, couldn't see through her own reflection, and brought her face close again. As she did, the golden cuff of a short dreadlock clinked against the window. Then she smiled.

"Oh! He's awake!" she called over her shoulder to someone below. Then she turned back to Dimitri. "Finally…"

Dimitri blinked. That wasn't the voice of a girl. Whoever it was, like a ghost, they started retreated backwards from the window. Dimitri popped up in alarm. They were going to fall off! What were they doing?

They didn't fall off. Dimitri had forgotten that there was a veranda. It was a veranda-like wooden platform that stretched all the way down the full length of the floor, connecting all of the student dorms on the second floor. There was no railing and Dimitri couldn't fathom why it was there, but person who had been rapping on his window had stepped into the light on it.

It was a student, judging by the uniform. He had his hands on his hips and the smile of a rascal. The thick, dark, kinky hair was offset by the blazing yellow House Leader cape flowing off his left shoulder. It lifted lazily in a light breeze.

Dimitri blinked. This was the Golden Deer House Leader.

That House Leader spoke to him. "Rise and shine, Your Highness! Your public…awaits!" He indicated said imaginary public with a grand wave of his caped arm, then stepped backwards and fell off the ledge.

The Prince sprang out of bed and flew to the window with a strangled yowl, thinking, Did he just — ? Did he just — ?

Ah. The student was fine. He had landed in the arms of a girl with two giant, pink pony tails. She must have been incredibly strong, because the House Leader was lounging in her princess carry and waving back at the Prince. And standing beside them, ready and braced for anything to come flying out of Dimitri's room, was Dedue.

Dimitri let out his breath, trying to recover from his minor heart attack. He glared at his vassal and did a hand motion, something that clearly expressed: "What's this shit?"

Dedue shook his head.

Then the Golden Deer House Leader started calling. "Come on out, Your Princeliness!"

Dimitri heard him surprisingly well. It was almost as if the window was open.

It was. It was ajar. That was how the cold air was coming in. The Golden Deer House Leader had broken into it.

This was, unbeknownst to Dimitri, the beginning of when the Prince would learn what it meant to Fear the Deer.

"Well, don't just stand there! Let's get breakfast already!" said the pink-haired girl. "I'm hungry!"

"Come on, Baby Blaiddyd!" said the House Leader. "Let's get to know each other!"

Baby Blaiddyd? thought Dimitri, stunned. The Prince was coming to a horrible realization. All this time, he thought he didn't sleep. Now he was realizing, if the rest of the students were anything like these two…he would't sleep for the rest of the school year…

And school hadn't even begun!