Chapter 2: Origin

He slowly closed the file that Hoswald had placed on his desk a few hours earlier. The Ori. He sighed and ran a hand through his hair. To think that he had thought that they had finished with all that. That Earth was safe, after all, he had eradicated the Goa'uld threat. For eight years they had fought relentlessly. The Jaffa had won their freedom, they were finally free. Not just the Jaffa, but them, the SG1 team.

Earth was free of the threat of invasion and SG1 was finally able to get off the ground. The team was no longer the galaxy's only bulwark against the Goa'uld, SG1 was now just a support to the establishment of democracy. They were able to get on with their lives, to keep moving forward without fear of the world falling into tyranny.

Daniel would finally be able to join the Atlantis mission, Space Monkey would discover a new playground.

Teal'c would soon be sitting on the first council of the Jaffa nation.

As for Carter... Carter had given up fieldwork to focus on research.

No, he mentally corrected himself, he was lying to himself. She had left the SGC for him, for them. So that they could live this relationship that had been brewing between them for almost ten years. Everything had changed when Jacob died. The annihilation of the Goa'uld threat, then the Replicators, all these events had pushed her to reconsider their situation.

His transfer to the head of Homeland Security had changed everything between them.

For the first time in ten years they had the opportunity to be together without damaging their careers. So she asked for the transfer. For them. For him. And their life, his life had changed.

He was happy. He should have known that this happiness and this feeling of security were ephemeral. When he was happy everything invariably went wrong. There had been Sara and Charlie, Lara. He sighed. Why did his relationship with Sam always have to come second to their duty? Why couldn't they be happy together, take time off from the missions? Why couldn't the Earth be saved by others for once?

For the first time in his life Jonathan O'Neill considered being selfish because he knew that Hank would eventually ask him, what Mitchell would ask because if he had been in their shoes he would have done the same. Very soon the SGC would be asking for the return of Lieutenant Colonel Samantha Carter. And Sam would answer, out of duty. Because the fate of the Galaxy rested too often in his hands, or rather in the heart of his mind.

He let himself go in his comfortable leather armchair. Carter would soon be back under his direct chain of command and their history ... Their story would be illegal again.

"General?" He turned his eyes to his office door where his assistant was deflecting him with concern.

"Yes Lieutenant?" He had regained control of his emotions and his usual impassive expression the moment she had shown up.

"Stargate Command informs us that the Odyssey has returned to base without any problems. Colonel Carter will be landing at Andrews AFB at 1800 hours, sir."

He nodded in assent, understanding the implied order, she closed the office door behind her Soon they would have to choose between their duty and their desire. They could choose to be selfish, but Jack knew, he knew that neither of them would be able to put duty, the survival of the Earth, ahead of their personal desire. Jack knew, because they had been in this situation many times. Earth had been threatened and saved many times in ten years, but his instincts told him that this time it was different. For his instincts told him that they would hear from the Ori very soon. There was a new threat to Earth and he wanted to ignore it and enjoy his weekend with Carter, but duty was pulling at him. The weight of a decision he couldn't bring himself to make was already on his shoulders.

(...)

She knew the moment she stepped onto the tarmac that something had happened, disturbing their reunion. After nearly ten years in the field with him, she knew how to read his moods, she knew when he was anxious or annoyed. To the rest of the world, except maybe Teal'c and Daniel, his emotions, his thoughts were impenetrable, he was a particularly indecipherable three-star general, an asset when you were responsible for the safety of the nation on a galaxy-wide scale.

She knew that something had changed, that something was tormenting him, and yet he was waiting at the foot of the Cessna that had driven her from Nevada to Washington with his usual nonchalance. He smiled slightly as he discreetly detailed her with his eyes. She was wearing her uniform just like him. She knew that when they left the base and went to Jack's apartment downtown, they would attract the eyes of some curious people.

But who would she blame? The sight of Jack in uniform was worth the three hours she had just spent in a military plane in an uncomfortable seat in the back of the cockpit.

She smiled back as she walked down the ramp of the plane, she would have liked to chase away the wrinkle that crossed her forehead but they were on a military Air Force base. He was a general, she a lieutenant colonel. If a relationship was made possible between them by a change in command, they were still bound by the reserve of their ranks when they were on a military base. She forced herself to walk slowly down the ramp of the Cesena to him. She froze in front of him, a smile lighting up her eyes, and addressed him with the military salute that one would expect from a lieutenant-colonel in front of a general. The wrinkle of concern that crossed her forehead faded as he smiled at her.

"At ease, Carter." There was something warm about the order and his smile softened the solemnity of the moment. "Welcome home Samantha." He whispered to her alone.

She had come home. Her home was where it was. She had always known that. Nothing would ever change that.

(...)

She laughed, the sound vibrating in the air for a moment between them. He felt her lips curve into an amused smile. His arm wrapped around the scientist's slender waist and pulled her closer to him. She nestled her face against his shoulder, pressing her cheek against his bare chest.

"She tied him up with a Goa'uld handcuff! Daniel must have wanted to kill her."

Jack's laughter joined his as he slowly stroked her bare arm up and down with his free hand.

"I do indeed believe that Dany Boy had murderous urges ... I'm almost sorry I don't know this Vala, if she's annoying our favorite archaeologist, she deserves to have me give her first jelly in the Mess!" She laughed again, her big blue eyes glowing softly in the gloom.

"Jack!" She scolded him both in defense of the archaeologist and because he had half-heartedly mocked her taste for blue jelly.

"Mitchell is happy, he almost reformed the team." Answered he, the mine suddenly more dark. Samantha straightened up on an elbow to plunge her glance in his.

"I'm not going anywhere Jack. I'm done with off-world missions. I love what I do at Area 51... I love you and our life here. We have suffered for eight years to save the galaxy... If Daniel and Teal'c want to go back, they can. I don't want to anymore, I've sacrificed too much for this country, for this planet. I've lost people I care about, Martouf, Janet, my father... I don't want to lose us, not again. Eight years... All I want is to finally be happy. And I am. With you. Here. "He had an opportunity here, to remind her of her duty, their duty. To tell her that if the SGC asked for her return he would have no choice but to contact her, because she was this country's greatest national treasure, she was unrivaled as a military and as a scientist.

If SG1 and the SGC had been able to do without him, General Jack O'Neill, it was not the same for her. Samantha Carter could not be imitated. It was his duty to remind her of her duty, of her oath to her country. But he couldn't bring himself to do it.

Love could be selfish and he wanted more than anything to keep her with him, here, safe, to finally build what should have been between them for years. They had given eight years of their lives to the Army, eight years in which their love had grown, matured. Jack couldn't just write off those few months of happiness. Even if the greater good was at stake. He wanted to believe that Daniel, Mitchell, Teal'c and Vala, although the help this intergalactic thief could provide had yet to be proven, wanted to believe that they would find a solution alone to fight the Ori.

He wanted to believe that.

So he kissed her rather than answering her, he rolled gently on top of her, trapping her between his arms, seeking oblivion in this naked body he had come to know and love.

This woman was his life. He could not bring himself to let her go.

The earth would go on without her for a while. He was very good at hiding his pain, at living with the constant anguish of having a loved one taken away from him.

He tried to convince himself that if he had survived the death of his son, he would be able to let her go in time.

But how could he keep away a woman who had chosen to finally live the happiness to which she had a right?

(...)

"General?" He gasped, surprised by the disembodied voice that had just resounded in his office, catching him in a daydream, but his assistant was not at the entrance to his office. No, her voice had been raised from the communicator linking his office to hers. He recovered quickly, mechanically adjusting the tie on his uniform.

"Yes, Hoswald?" His assistant didn't mind that his boss called him exclusively by name and not just by rank. That was one of the things he appreciated about his subordinate...that and her ability to handle the paperwork he abhorred in a pinch.

"General Landry on the line, he says it concerns the SGC my General. "Jack sighed, he knew this moment would come. Ever since the preliminary report regarding the preacher had arrived on his desk.

"Put him through, Julia. Thank you." He took a deep breath as his assistant switched the call to him.

"Jack!" The voice of his old friend did not evoke in him the echo of old memories of his career, this time this voice only increased his tension.

"Hank, I've been waiting for your call." He let himself go in the thick leather of his armchair and untied the tie that clasped his neck. This was going to be a difficult conversation, he knew what Hank was going to ask him, he had held his position, he knew what he would have done if the roles had been reversed.

"Jack, I need you to come to the SGC..."

(...)

COLORADO SPRINGS. CHEYENNE MOUNTAIN. THE -28 LEVEL.

Usually when he came back to town it was only to see his old friends. They had been celebrating Daniel and Teal'c's upcoming departure. It had cost Sam and Jack a lot to pretend that their relationship was platonic in front of their best friends, but they had decided to keep it a secret for a while, to live their relationship to the fullest.

After years of rumors at the base, they had not wanted to reveal themselves too quickly.

He had just come out of his briefing with Hank and he wasn't looking too happy. He knew why Hank had called him in. But that didn't make the pill any easier to swallow. He had naturally let his steps guide him to the office, the museum would have been more accurate, from Daniel. Like in the past, when they were all still SG1. He had watched his friend for a few seconds from the doorway without manifesting himself. Like before.

"Good evening. Judging that his observation had lasted long enough and that Daniel would probably not notice his presence if he didn't show up, Jack had taken a step into the office.

- What are you doing here?" Daniel's incredulous expression drew the three-star general the shadow of a smile. He knew why his steps had led him to Daniel, Jack needed advice and yet he knew he wasn't talking to him about what was bothering him, about the decision he had to make. He never talked about his problems. Yet he had told Daniel about Charlie almost ten years earlier. What he had come to find here, in this office, was friendship, the presence of someone he considered a brother.

"Happy to see you, too. He replied a bit caustically.

- Sorry, I didn't expect to see you. Jack would have smiled if he hadn't felt so oppressed, the pain gnawed at him, the weight of duty devoured him.

"I was in the neighborhood. As always, he took refuge behind humor to hide what he was really feeling. And I have a little surprise for Mitchell. He added as if to justify his presence in this office even though he was no longer part of SG1. The smile he put on to emphasize his words was a bit strained, but Daniel didn't seem to notice. The year he had spent away from Sam, Daniel and Teal'c as head of the SGC had been a difficult one. Leaving the field to become a pencil pusher... Today he'd had to make a much harder decision, and the pain pulsed dully in his heart.

"He loved the last one. Daniel replied ironically. You didn't tell him we changed assignments.

- Yes." Indeed, he had been silent about it. He needed someone to take over the leadership of SG1 so that Sam could step down. He knew Mitchell would make a good leader, after all SG1 owed his life to him, so it seemed logical that he would take over and put together his own team. But the irony of the situation brought back his sullen expression. After all, Mitchell now had almost what he wanted most... the original team would be back together: Daniel, Teal'c and... Samantha Carter. SG1. But he didn't want to think about that. "I'm sorry you missed the Daedalus. He added to divert the conversation from Mitchell and SG1.

- No, you're not.

- You're right." Daniel was wrong he really was because if he had taken that ship as planned, if Vala hadn't found a way to keep him on Earth the Ori threat would never have been known, the galaxy would have been saved. He and Sam would have gone on to live happily ever after, taking a well-deserved rest after saving the world countless times.

"I just talked to Landry. We talked about you know... them there. If only Daniel and Vala hadn't discovered his communication stones. If only we could go back. That he didn't have to choose between duty and feeling.

- Yes.

- Could that be a problem?" He would have liked Daniel to reassure him but he had read his report, the Ori suffered no comparison to the Goa'uld, they were not dealing with megalomaniacal parasites this time. They were dealing with Gods, or at least superior entities with real powers. This time it was different. If it had only been a Goa'uld, Sam could have stayed with him. But the threat was different this time, the issue was saving the galaxy and duty, again, called her away.

"Yes. We've seen some good ones, but this could be worse.

- Good ones? I wouldn't say that, except for dear Hathor." Humor was the only weapon he had left to keep his other thoughts, his emotions, at bay. He also knew what his country expected of him today.

"We've been in some tough situations.

- And we've always triumphed." He hoped that this time the battle would not last nine years. He hoped that his happiness would not be the price of defeating the enemy.

"But wasn't it because someone was protecting us? I won't tell anyone else, but for the first time I'm afraid.

- And I'm hungry." He wished he could have told Daniel that he too was afraid, a primal fear that was eating him up inside. He was going to have to take two steps back after taking nine years to give himself a chance at happiness. And he was afraid to let them fight this battle without him. Afraid of the report coming in that would tell him they were dead. While he would be waiting in Washington while she risked her life on the other side of the galaxy.

(…)

"I love it. It makes you feel alive.

- Yeah." Mitchell had his back to him, so he couldn't see his superior's expression. He was far from the happy face that the young colonel was showing. Yet he had hoped that flying would help him regain his serenity, to accept the decisions he had to make. But it was far from being the case. He owed Mitchell a real reward for the dirt he had made on him with SG1, even if his omission no longer seemed relevant. SG1 was going to reform. And Mitchell was a constant reminder of what he was going to have to sacrifice as soon as he returned to Washington.

"I probably would have flown again sooner if I'd known we could take his little wonders.

- That's one of the advantages of being a general. You can do just about anything you want." A bitter smile grazed his lips. Just about anything you want. He couldn't keep Sam in Washington any longer. He had the power to do so, but duty demanded that he send her back to the SGC where she would be most useful now that a new enemy was knocking at their door. He couldn't keep her around. He couldn't afford everything.

"Yeah, and besides, you've saved the world seven or eight times...

- Who's keeping score?

- Teal'c. In fact, he talks about it a lot." But having saved the world seven or eight times had also made them, their team, an indispensable part of crisis resolution. With SG1 disbanded, a new enemy would arise and the team would be called upon again. There would never be any rest for them.

"Say Mitchell, I hear you haven't put the new team together yet. He couldn't help asking the question. As if to hammer the point home one last time. If Landry was asking for Sam, maybe Mitchell wouldn't want to see the command of SG1 taken away from him by the return of Lieutenant Colonel Samantha Carter.

"I hope to avoid that. Why? Did General Landry mention this?

- Yes, he did.

- May I ask what he said, General?

- He said you're coming along just fine, Mitchell." So much for the hope that was still in him. Mitchell wouldn't replace Sam. He wanted Carter to join the team. He wanted to learn from the best and that. He had to satisfy Mitchell's desire to reform the original team, he knew that, his mind understood that. But his heart didn't accept it.