AN: Hi! I'm deeply sorry for not posting for about two months... I kinda neglected the story because I was lacking inspiration but now I'm back.

Hopefully you are still in for this rollercoaster ride. Expect me to be back in a week, otherwise you are allowed to kick my ass.

As always, please read and review xx


Chapter 5: Count on me


Kate was spending her lunch break in her classroom, going over her students' homework. She was enjoying being a teacher, the class seemed to slowly accept her and her colleagues were great, especially Lanie.

Espo had been driving to school with Kate again. That guy hadn't gotten his car fixed yet and she didn't mind picking him up and having some company on the way to school.

They even talked a bit about Lanie but every time she tried to get something out of him, he would close off. Knowing Espo, she assumed he liked her quite a lot. If it wasn't the case, he would be saying inappropriate stuff about her and women in general. He would even be throwing himself at Lanie and try to conquest her. But he seemed to be shy when it came to Lanie, which was a good sign.

She was hoping that Lanie would take the initiative and spend her lunch break with Espo. They didn't know it yet but they would make a great match and could be just what the other one needed.

Kate still couldn't stop thinking about a certain crime author. She had just met him yesterday and he seemed to invade her thoughts even more than before.

She had been to one of his book-signings, the year after her parents had died. She had started reading his books to feel somehow closer to her Mom, who had loved his books dearly and would keep talking about that good-looking and talented author for hours, driving her dad and her insane. There had been a book signing on her Mom's birthday, 10 months after her parents were killed. Espo had convinced her to go to that signing to distract herself instead of drowning her sorrows in booze. At first she had been reluctant to do so but Espo had literally dragged her to the bookstore.

She'd waited hours to get her book signed. But when she had reached the front of the line, her heart had stopped beating. She would never forget the moment in which she got to meet Richard Castle. She had felt like fainting. She had only talked to Richard Castle for less than a minute, but it was enough to keep her going. He had looked at her, truly looked at her and had noticed the sadness which had been her companion for the past year. For a random person his note to her would not be any special but to her it meant quite a lot. It saved her.

When she'd woken up today all she could think about was Richard Castle and his terrific daughter. She knew that he would never fall for someone as simple as her. He was a rich, good-looking and a famous writer who could have any woman he desired. So why would he want to be with her? Her, who was a mess and damaged beyond repair.

She was so lost in her thoughts, that she didn't notice a small girl lurking into her classroom. Just at the moment that little girl saw her sitting at her desk, she came running towards her.

"Miss Kate, Miss Kate!", she exclaimed, which caused Kate to look up and stop daydreaming.

Once she recognized Alexis, she immediately started smiling. That little girl was a bundle of energy who had left an impact on her.

Alexis hugged her waist tightly and Kate put her arms protectively around the girl and hugged her back.

After a long moment Alexis pulled back and looked at her insecurely while stepping nervously from one foot to the other.

"I missed you!", she whispered while looking down and holding Monkey-Bunkey tight against her chest, as if she was waiting to be rejected or let down. Kate could feel her heart simultaneously melting and breaking for that precious little girl.

"I missed you... and Monkey-Bunkey too."

This caused Alexis to smile widely and to hug Kate again.

"I drew a picture for you", she said slowly while reaching for the drawing which had fallen to the ground and giving it to her. Kate took a quick look at the drawing and could see that Alexis had drawn a beautiful butterfly for her.

Before Kate could say anything, Alexis added quickly: „but you dont have to keep it, it's not that good. Daddy says, he likes my drawings but the other girls in my class can draw better".

She looked insecurely at the ground. Kate took both of Alexis' hands into hers.

"Alexis-Sweetheart, look at me?"

After a moment, Alexis looked up, scared that Kate would tell her that she hated her drawing and did not want her to stay.

"This is a beautiful drawing. You are a talented little girl and I'm really flattered that you've drawn this one for me. Don't ever doubt it. Do you know what I'll do with your amazing drawing?"

Alexis just shook her head no and looked at her wide-eyed.

"Drawings this great deserve a special place, don't you think? That's why I'm going to take it home with me and hang it on my fridge. So every time I go into my kitchen I'll see your beautiful drawing and this will make me think of one special little redheaded girl and her little Monkey-Bunkey", Kate said and gently stroked her right cheek.

"Do you really like my drawing?", Alexis said while slowly starting to smile.

"I do, Alexis. It's impressive how talented you are. Thank you for gifting me with that beautiful drawing!"

"So how was your day so far? I bet Ms. Lanie taught you a lot of things. She told me about all the interesting facts she wanted to teach your class".

All of a sudden insecure Alexis was gone and replaced by happy and chatty Alexis. That girl truly loved school.

"We learnt so many things today, did you know that hedgehogs hibernate?", she asked excited. "Oh and that the human body consists of around 206 bones, and that dolphins are mammals and no fishy? I can tell Daddy all about it. ", she kept rambling proudly.

Kate laughed and squeezed Alexis' hands gently. „Oh I did know that, Miss Lanie just told me all about it yesterday. But did you know that only male peacocks have those beautiful and colorful feathers?"

Alexis looked at her amazed. "Oh, I didn't know that! Thank you for teaching me that, Miss Kate. Daddy will be so proud to learn this as well. I'm sure he doesn't know that yet."

"I'm certain, he already is so proud of his little and intelligent girl", she smiled.

"I love school, and Miss Lanie is amazing. Even Monkey-Bonkey loves it here. Can't you be my teacher as well? We would have sooo much fun together and you could teach me about things that Miss Lanie does not know about like you just did.", she looks up at her expectantly.

"Sweetheart, unfortunately I can't be your teacher, but you can come to me whenever you want or need me. And if you have any questions about school, I'll try to answer them. We can be friends, is that okay?"

Alexis smiled excitely, „It is! Does that mean that you will come over on the weekends and play with me? Paige, my new best friend, told me that's what friends are supposed to do. And we can have sleep-overs, bake cookies and braid our hair..."

Alexis was going on and on about the stuff they could be doing but Kate felt a little overwhelmed. How was she supposed to tell that little girl that she couldn't have sleep-overs with her without making her insecure again?

"Sweetheart? I don't think that your Daddy would like me to come over. Why don't we meet up here for now?"

"Miss Kate, Daddy likes you. He wouldn't mind", she said while smiling adorably at her.

'Saved by the bell', Kate thought when she heard the ringing of the bell.

"Oh Miss Kate, I have to go now, we have a math class now!", she jumped around excitedly. "Can I visit you tomorrow again?", she asked hesitantly.

"Of course you can, Sweetie I'm looking forward to it", with that Kate pulled Alexis into a warm hug.

"I'm glad you are my friend now, Miss Kate.", Alexis whispered which caused Kate to squeeze her tightly. After a moment Alexis pulled back, took Monkey-Bunkey by its hand and walked out with a spring in her step.

"So am I, Sweetie, so am I." Kate whispers to herself. She was getting way to attached to this little girl and it wasn't only because of her Dad.

Richard Castle liked her? Alexis wouldn't lie about that, would she? But he probably just liked her because she waited with Alexis until he arrived. There were two stages of liking someone and he most likely won't ever like her the way she wanted him to.

But did she really want him to like her? It might not be wise.

'How could you get attached to a little girl that you barely know that fast? And how do you unattach yourself again before ruining everything?'

These questions were speeding through Kate's mind while she got ready for her next class.


AN: As you can see, Alexis is quite an insecure girl. I wanted her to be a happy but doubting girl who needs someone to tell her that she is loved and loveable. I'm not a psychologist but not having a Mother figure would most likely leave a mental scar on her, that will take time to heal. So I'm giving my best to represent the situation (and to add some bonus angst to the mixture oops). But I might not always get it right. Same goes for the 'school situation'. I know that they are way too close to each other and that there has to be some distance between them, but its way easier writing about them getting attached to each other.

Uhh, over the past months I've been writing some other fanfics with the lovely 'AbsentiaCastle', so make sure to check out `Fighting with Fire`, which is already completed and 'Everything I didn't say', which we just started uploading. Both fanfics can be found on Anna's account.