Premonitions III: Advent Children
Disclaimer: I don't own Advent Children, nor any characters therein.
The following narrative is a sequel to Premonitions and Premonitions II: Crisis Core. It is suggested to read those stories first. As of 2021, we have two continuities; the original, and the remake. The Premonitions series is based on the original continuity, although it takes place in an alternate timeline created when the villain Bestla travels back in time and changes history, inadvertently causing premonitions in the other characters, hence the title.
Part I: Mayhem
Chapter 1: Zack and Yuffie
Zack Fair sat at the kitchen table at his parents' house in Gongaga. It was the first time he had seen them in years, and, after the initial celebration that he was still alive, all parties had many questions. He had been on countless adventures, as well as countless misadventures. It would not be possible to tell them all.
His girlfriend, Yuffie Kisaragi, sat next to him. She was wearing a fuchsia spaghetti strap dress. I call that kind of a dress a see-you-next-Tuesday, after the body part it almost shows.
I'm sure his parents noticed. Despite that, they tried to be as cordial as possible. They were from an older generation, and knew to expect the unexpected.
"So how did you two meet?" Mrs. Fair asked.
"We met at Fort Tamblin," Zack replied. "When I was seventeen."
"I was nine," Yuffie added.
Zack's parents remained silent for a moment, obviously taking in the fact that Zack and Yuffie were eight years apart.
Zack and Yuffie never cared about their age gap, and good for them. I find age just a number; a lifetime together kind of overshadows it.
"What brought you to Fort Tamblin?" asked Mr. Fair.
"Members of SOLDIER were deserting," Zack replied. "This was when I was still Second Class. They sent me and my friend Angeal to investigate. When we were there, we saw that there were copies of one of the deserters, Genesis Rhapsodos. Somehow, he was making copies of himself."
"Making copies of himself?" asked Mr. Fair skeptically. "You mean like a vampire?"
"In a way," Zack replied. "Angeal and Genesis were friends, so the Shinra got suspicious. They sent me and Tseng to his hometown of Banora. We found the real Genesis there." He paused, and lowered his head. "We also learned that Angeal had gone insane and betrayed the Shinra. He even killed his own mother."
"Good Lord," Mrs. Fair muttered. "And you considered him your friend?"
Zack nodded.
"I never knew," he insisted. "But he didn't start it. A few months later, Genesis copies came to Midgar and attacked the Shinra Building. We found out that the whole mess was started by the deranged Hollander. I went after him, but Angeal came to his rescue. I was knocked into the void and ended up in a church in the slums."
"Is that where you met that ditz who was always trying to have fun at inappropriate times?" Mr. Fair inquired.
Mrs. Fair elbowed him, feeling that it was grossly inappropriate to discuss former relationships in front of a new girlfriend.
Zack nodded, knowing that Yuffie knew everything.
"Anyways, Genesis and Angeal attracked the Shinra Building. We didn't hear from them again for months until they were spotted in Modeoheim. So, of course, I was sent there."
"And that was where he met Cloud," Yuffie added.
"Cloud?" inquired Mr. Fair.
"The spikey haired blonde," Yuffie clarified.
"Oh, him," Mr. Fair remembered.
Zack lowered his head again.
"I...had to kill Angeal in self-defence," he stated sadly.
It was a painful memory that still somewhat lingered.
"Sorry you had to do that," said Mrs. Fair.
"The worst came when we were sent to Nibelheim," Zack informed them.
"Cloud went with him and saw Tifa again," Yuffie added, deviating from the subject.
"Is Tifa that girl with no clothes on that we saw right before Meteor appeared?" asked Mr. Fair.
"Yeah," Yuffie replied. "That's her."
"I almost wanted to tell her to cover up," Mr. Fair grunted.
"When we got to the Nibelheim reactor," Zack continued, "we ended up buying more than we bargained for. Sephiroth discovered the remains of what he thought was his mother, and he went crazy. In the aftermath, Hojo put us both into Mako tanks for the next four years."
"Four years?" exclaimed Mrs. Fair.
"Four years," Zack confirmed.
"So that's where you've been!" Mr. Fair said.
"Mostly," Zack admitted.
"Well," Mr. Fair continued, "you obviously got out."
"I did," Zack replied, "but Cloud had too much Mako poisoning, so I had to carry him to a thicket."
"And that's where he meet me as a teenager," Yuffie added. "But he didn't know four years went by. He was so confused."
"I actually made it here," Zack continued. "But that's when Cissnei caught up to me."
"That must have been when she was checking on us," Mr. Fair observed.
"You got it," Zack confirmed. "But she was good enough to look the other way."
"She is a nice girl," Mrs. Fair pointed out.
"Later on," Zack continued, "I caught up to Hollander and killed him. I met Lazard, who was now becoming an Angeal copy."
"You mean the director of SOLDIER?" Mr. Fair inquired.
"Ex," Zack corrected. "Yeah."
"I heard he's President Shinra's love child," Mrs. Fair said.
"You got it," Yuffie confirmed. "So is Cloud."
"I tracked Genesis to Banora and defeated him," Zack continued. "He turned back into a normal human being. But Lazard died. And then, I found out that four years had gone by."
"What happened to Genesis?" asked Mrs. Fair.
At that moment, Yuffie turned to Zack.
"Yeah, what did happen to Genesis?" she echoed.
"I'm not sure," Zack replied. "He hasn't been seen or heard from since. And while all the leaked Shinra information has revealed nothing about his current whereabouts, it would be a reasonable supposition he is dead."
"What happened then?" asked Mr. Fair.
"I needed to get to Midgar," he replied.
"It so happened that I had two barge tickets," Yuffie added. "I gave them to him in exchange for a date."
"So you've been dating for a year already?" asked Mrs. Fair.
Yuffie shook her head.
"That date didn't happen until a little over a week ago," she replied. "Things kind of popped up."
"Popped up?" asked Mr. Fair.
"Cloud and I were on our way to Midgar when we were ambushed," Zack explained. "I thought I was mortally wounded. But Cissnei zapped me back to life."
"Cissnei?!" exclaimed Mrs. Fair. "That nice Cissnei?"
"You got it," Zack confirmed. "She brought me to McDougal Island. A man named Skrug healed me by dipping me into the Lifestream."
"And you recovered?" asked Mr. Fair.
Zack nodded.
"I thought I was on my way to living a full life. And then, Meteor."
"And you didn't come to see us thinking the world would end?" Mr. Fair inquired.
"Tobin and I decided to challenge the Island Gulag," Zack replied sheepishly.
"Zack," Mrs. Fair began, "that's crazy!"
"There were three hundred suicides because of Meteor," Zack pointed out. "At least I wanted to go out a hero."
"I take it you got captured," Mr. Fair said.
Zack nodded.
"We thought we were fucked," he admitted.
"Zachary!" exclaimed Mrs. Fair. "Watch your mouth!"
"Well," continued Mr. Fair, "you're obviously still here."
"After Meteor was destroyed," Zack continued, "Tifa Lockheart went to see the Continental Governor. She found out her father was still alive and went there looking for leads."
"It's Tifa Strife now," Yuffie interjected.
"Right," Zack corrected himself. "Anyways, the Continental Governor was trying to cover up the existence of the Island Gulag, since it so happened to be in her jurisdiction. Tifa's dad just happened to be at the Island Gulag with me, so that meant that if she found him, she'd expose the whole mess."
"Did they go after her?" asked Mrs. Fair.
"Did they," Zack confirmed. "As soon as she found out where the Island Gulag was, Karnak ambushed her and had her beaten and left to die. He had a girl-thug break every bone in her body."
"Did she die?" Mr. Fair asked.
"It was a close call," Zack replied. "She went to McDougal Island and got the same 'therapy' I did."
"Then the Continental Governor cooked her own goose," added Yuffie. "She actually gave Tifa keys to her boat."
"Why on earth would she do that?" asked Mrs. Fair.
"God only knows," Yuffie admitted.
"Maybe she was tired of running," Zack suggested. "She knew she was beaten. Or she was trying to lure Tifa into a trap. I don't really know."
"She obviously went there," Mr. Fair said.
"You got it," Zack confirmed. "She went there with Cloud. They rescued her father, then me, and then her cousin, Tobin. They locked Karnak in Tobin's old cell and we all escaped."
"And when he got back to Nibelheim, I confronted him," Yuffie added.
"For what?" asked Mrs. Fair.
"He owed me a date," Yuffie replied. "So we went to the wedding together. And the next day, we found out we had remained a couple."
"Wait a minute," Mrs. Fair interjected. "Wedding?! Who got married?"
"Cloud and Tifa," Yuffie replied. "Our first date was their wedding."
"How was it?" Mrs. Fair asked.
"It was great," Yuffie replied. "I was so happy to see them get married. They had feelings for each other all their lives."
"Does she wear clothes now, now that she's married?" asked Mr. Fair.
Yuffie nodded.
"She's become a tee shirt and jeans girl," she replied. "Although they spent their honeymoon butt naked on a private island."
"Wow," said Mrs. Fair in a monotone. "Young people."
"And she proposed to him!" Yuffie continued.
That's true. Cloud and Tifa admitted their feelings for each other after Junon was destroyed, and they dated for a while. Unfortunately, their relationship ended before long; I won't go into details, but let's just say there were skeletons in Cloud's closet. Sometimes you just have to bow to fate. After the cause of their breakup was out of the equation, Tifa pulled it. She was acting like they were just going to stay friends and that they would never be getting back together.
The next day, Tifa texted him and asked him to come over. He found himself in her living-room while the TV was playing a video that was praising up their friendship. And then, Tifa snuck up behind him, got down on one knee, and opened a ring box.
She had a hidden camera in the room recording it. Later, she showed me the video; I'll admit I cried when I saw it. It was so beautiful.
"Women don't propose to men," Mrs. Fair said.
That's bullshit; I proposed to my husband.
Sort of.
"Was the ceremony traditional?" asked Mr. Fair.
"Absolutely," Yuffie replied. "She walked down the aisle in a wedding dress, they took their vows, they had their first dance, and everything else. And more."
"And more?" Mrs. Fair asked.
I love this part.
"Yeah, more," continued Yuffie. "So we were all sitting at our tables, waiting for the dancing to start. I spotted Tifa talking to her cousin. He was looking really nervous about something. And then, all of a sudden, we were all called outside. There was a second ceremony marrying Tifa's cousin to Cissnei. Nobody saw it coming. Not even Cissnei!"
"Wait a minute," Mrs. Fair interjected. "They got married on a whim?"
"Sort of," Zack replied. "Cissnei and Tobin had been best friends for years."
"And before Zack headed off to the Island Gulag," added Yuffie, "Cissnei told Tobin that if he came back alive they had to get married. I don't think she was serious at the time, but now they're married."
Eh. Partial truth.
Yuffie was right, I wasn't serious when I said it. I had to stop him from going somehow; that was the first thing that came to mind. I figured if I made a demand that extreme, he'd change his mind. Unfortunately, he didn't. Off to the Island Gulag he went, leaving me to think I'd never see him again.
I was laying in bed that night, unable to sleep. I first met Tobin when he was a teenager. We were roommates, and, at first, I could tell I annoyed him. Long story short, I looked out for him and probably overstepped my boundaries. Since he was so far away from his parents, I was the one who actually taught him to drive. And I know I drove him crazy in the process.
Then, a friend of his died suddenly; he was about to ask her to be his girlfriend. I stayed home for a few days to look after him, and, sure enough, we became the best of friends. We were separated on a few occasions, due to my Turk responsibilities, and I missed him terribly each time. But the worst came when he went to the Island Gulag. I stopped showering or caring about hygiene. I never went out. I had basically shut down. I suppose that proved I loved him, but, not being raised to love, I never would have known.
And then, Tobin returned. And I was so happy that I cried. I never cried before, but his return somehow triggered it. Of course, we didn't have much time to take it in, since Cloud and Tifa's wedding just happened to be the the next morning.
I woke up that morning and showered for the first time in weeks. I decided to wear a yellow dress that stopped just above my knees and a pair of yellow heels to match for the wedding. Honestly, I'm just as egalitarian as Tifa was, but that day, I somehow wanted to look a little more girly. So I went to the wedding with Tobin, my best friend.
I had no idea that it would be my wedding day as well. After Cloud and Tifa's first dance, Tobin made his move. He sat down next to me and reminded me of when I told him we would have to get married if he made it back. I laughed at first, thinking it was some kind of weird joke. Once I found out he was serious, my heart was racing. I never expected to get married, let alone on short notice.
It was Tifa's idea, and she really helped talk me into it. She had a point; I loved him. I had no reason to risk spending the rest of my life wondering what might have been. So, after I agreed, I was taken into Cloud and Tifa's house, where I changed out of my yellow dress and into a bridal gown. At less than an hour, my engagement to Tobin might have been the shortest engagement in the history of human events. I walked down the aisle, where we took our vows. We had our first dance. So I went home from the wedding with Tobin, my husband.
It wasn't the last time we would all see a sudden wedding like that, but that's another story. For now, back to this one.
"And you guys?" asked Mr. Fair.
"We just remained a couple," Yuffie replied. "You know, it just...happened."
"You just kept dating?" asked Mrs. Fair.
"Actually," Yuffie replied, "this is our second date."
"But the wedding was over a week ago," Mr. Fair pointed out.
"We got sidetracked," Zack replied. "Sephiroth got loose."
"He got loose?" asked Mr. Fair.
"The day after Cloud and Tifa's wedding, he was gone," Zack clarified.
"I thought he was petrified," Mr. Fair said.
"Was," Yuffie emphasized. "He was un-petrified and escaped to the Southern Continent. We followed him there."
"Wait a minute," Mr. Fair interjected. "You went through the Storm Belt?"
"We sure did," Yuffie replied. "Just an inflatable sphere would do the trick."
"We also went through a city full of mass surveillance, a nasty forest, a healing village, the Emerald Cave, another nomadic village, and then a canyon. All the way to Xenara, where we finally found Sephiroth."
"Did you catch him?" asked Mr. Fair.
Zack shook his head.
"He's still on the loose, back up north. Maybe the Continental Governor can send a team after him. I wonder how she's doing."
"She isn't," Mr. Fair replied. "Haven't you heard?"
"Heard what?"
"She committed suicide," Mr. Fair informed him. "She pulled her own trigger."
"My God," Yuffie muttered.
"I'm not really surprised," Zack admitted. "She was about to go to jail for the rest of her life for covering up the Island Gulag."
"Well," Yuffie continued. "I guess they'll be electing a new Continental Governor."
"A president," Mr. Fair corrected. "They adopted a new constitution. There'll be an election some time soon."
The four of them continued to make small talk for the next two hours. The trouble came when Mrs. Fair was washing the dishes. She had called Zack into the kitchen to help, and Mr. Fair soon followed him.
Yuffie sat alone at the table, listening to the voices. All she heard was: "You're old enough to be her high school teacher, Zack."
Yuffie grimaced slightly; she was kind of hoping for his parents' approval.
On their way back to Nibelheim, Zack decided to address the issue before it could get any worse.
"Can I ask a favor?" he requested.
"Of course," she replied with a smile. "It's about the sex we're having tonight, isn't it?"
The smile then faded.
"Wait a minute," Yuffie suddenly blurted. "You're not going to ask to go in my butt, are you?"
"No, no!" he laughed as he shook his head. "It's not even about the sex. I was going to ask you not to take my parents personally."
"Please," Yuffie insisted. "Guys' parents wouldn't even let me see them. This is a yawn!"
Zack introducing Yuffie to his parents had nothing to do with what came next, but I wrote the scene in to explain the current situation that was going on.
Most people would be completely unfamiliar with it unless they read the memoirs that my husband, Tobin, wrote. Those, of course, are the best-selling memoirs you probably heard about. As his wife, I can tell you the memoirs were mostly honest, though there were several things he embellished.
So, yeah, I'm Cissnei, and, yes, I'm a former Turk.
I'm a writer now. After Tobin published his memoirs and made a fortune, I wrote a tell-all book about my life as a Turk. I wrote this memoir after everyone who interviewed me asked about this little episode.
One complaint about my tell-all book about the Turk was the adult content. So I'll be blunt; this book is not for youngsters. It has sex and nudity in it. It has strong four-letter profanity and violence. So, if you're a kid, close the book now and apologize to your parents for buying it.
LATER THAT EVENING...
Zack and Yuffie entered Nibelheim just as the stars came out. Half of the lights were on, and everything was closed, except for the diner, and the underground bowling alley.
"I don't believe it," Yuffie said suddenly.
"What?" Zack inquired.
"I haven't stolen anything in over twenty-four hours," she announced. "That's a new milestone. Can I have a piggy-back ride?"
Zack sighed.
"I suppose."
Yuffie giggled in delight as she climbed onto his back.
Zack then carried her to the hotel lobby, up the stairs, and to the suite they had been staying in. He carried her into the room, set her down, closed the door behind him, and flopped on the bed, resting his back.
Yuffie lay down next to him.
"Don't tell me I'm too heavy or I'll have to kick your butt," she playfully warned.
"Maybe I'm just getting old," Zack sighed.
"Good answer," she giggled as she pecked him on the cheek.
For a moment, the couple lay there in silence.
Then, Yuffie began to speak her mind.
"So, Zack," she began. "Valentine's Day is coming up."
"No worries," he assured her. "I'm a good last-minute planner."
"Actually," Yuffie replied, "I want to plan."
"You do?" he asked skeptically.
Yuffie smiled and nodded.
"I want to surprise you," she insisted. "But if you want to plan anything, we could go out and do something."
"Tonight?" asked Zack.
Yuffie nodded.
"My back is killing me," he replied sheepishly.
"Fine then. I guess that means we'll have to stay in and do something," she said naughtily.
Zack took the cue.
He ran his hand over the soft skin of her shoulders. He ran in onto her dress over her back. And then, he slid his hand down so that it was touching her butt through her dress.
"You're hand's on my ass," Yuffie informed him.
Zack immediately withdrew his hand, blushing.
"I didn't say stop," she continued.
He placed his hand back on Yuffie's butt.
"Under!" she commended. "Under!"
Zack complied, reaching under her short dress and placing it right on her underwear. He could tell she was wearing a thong.
"That's better," she said.
He then shifted his hand, gently kneading the skin of her butt cheek.
"Oooh, I like that," Yuffie purred.
She placed her hand on Zack's face, pressed her lips, and her tongue, against his.
"Want to get even naughtier?" Zack whispered seductively.
"Are you kidding?" Yuffie blurted. "I've been horny since your parents' house!"
I don't need to go into further detail for you to know what happened next. But I'll say that Zack and Yuffie, despite their differences, were a good couple.
Well, that's what I think, anyway.
THE NEXT MORNING...
Monday, February 11, 0008
After showering together, Zack and Yuffie were back on the couch in their hotel room, watching the television. They had not eaten breakfast yet, and both were becoming hungry.
With food on both of their minds, Yuffie wanted to make something clear to Zack right then and there.
"So I should probably tell you I can't cook to save my life," she began. "And I don't plan on learning."
"No worries," Zack assured her.
He had not dated Yuffie with the expectation she could cook. The whole relationship ran away with itself.
She better not be worried about that, Zack thought to himself. I don't care if she can cook or not. Who came up with the idea that girlfriends are supposed to cook all the time, anyway?
He then remembered being cooked for. And he lowered his head in sadness.
Shit. Stop living in the past, Zack.
"I've already ordered us breakfast on the app," Yuffie continued as she checked her cell phone. "It should be delivered any minute."
Zack nodded and redirected his attention to the television, which featured a married couple with a seemingly endless supply of kids. It seemed to be some kind of reality show.
"What show is this?" he asked.
"Down on the Downing Farm," Yuffie replied. "You know Dirk and Dana Downing? Who live on the farm outside of Rocket Town?"
"I've heard of them," Zack answered.
"This is their reality show," she informed him. "I think Cid's related to them, on his mom's side."
The show cut to Dirk and several of his sons seemingly touring a very familiar venue.
"Are they touring the Shinra Building?" Zack asked in surprise.
Yuffie nodded.
"It's an older show from about a year ago," she replied. "Before all the shit went on."
On cue, the now-late Rufus Shinra appeared on the television.
"Welcome, Downings!" he greeted.
"Thanks, Mr. Vice President!" the boys greeted back in unison.
"How many kids do they have?" Zack inquired.
"Sixteen," Yuffie replied.
"There's only seven," he pointed out.
"I know," she acknowledged. "They only take the boys to learn about jobs."
"Why?"
"They're old school," Yuffie replied. "They believe a woman belongs in the kitchen."
"Damn," Zack muttered.
"And they're also extremely homophobic," she added.
"Why am I not surprised?" Zack sighed.
The show then cut to a commercial.
"How did he die, anyway?" Zack inquired.
"Rufus?" replied Yuffie. "Tifa knocked him out of an elevator."
"She killed him?"
"Not on purpose," she clarified. "He offended her and she meant to punch his lights out. The glass wall was weaker than she expected."
"Damn," he muttered.
"I know," she added. "Tifa's not somebody you want to mess with."
After the commercial break, the scene returned to sixteen children sitting at the kitchen table with Dana standing over them.
"What are they doing now?" Zack asked.
"Homeschooling," Yuffie replied. "They call where we went 'public fools.'"
"It is widely held the Mako reactors are draining the life force from the Planet," Dana began. "What is wrong with this assumption?"
All of the children were silent.
"Delilah?" Dana suddenly called.
"I'm sorry mom," she replied. "I don't know."
"That's okay," Dana assured her. "Danica?"
"I'm sorry mom," she replied. "I don't know."
"That's okay," Dana assured her. "David?"
"I'm sorry mom," he replied. "I don't know."
Dana gave him a nasty look.
"You don't know," she reprimanded as she folded her arms. "How are you going to argue with your co-workers when they bring something like this up?"
David gave her a sheepish look.
"Daniel?" called Dana.
"Over the past twenty years, only 0.2 percent of all plant life became extinct," Daniel replied.
"Good," Dana complimented. "Go on."
"It's a lie brought up by politicians to scare people and get elected into office," Daniel continued.
"Of course it's bullshit," Yuffie said. "Mako reactors drained the Planet's energy. I saw it with my own eyes."
"Why do you watch this?" Zack inquired.
"Because it makes me feel better about myself," Yuffie replied. "I'm not the smartest girl in the world, but I'm a hell of a lot smarter than them!"
Suddenly, there was a knock on the door.
"Don't tell me we were too loud last night," Yuffie groaned.
Zack got up and opened the door.
A familiar figure was standing beyond the threshold.
"Cloud?!" Zack exclaimed.
"You're never going to believe this," he announced.
