Alois thought for a while, coming up with several plans as to how he was going to convince Integra to allow Ciel to go through with this plan without getting in the way. He had several pages full of potential plans and details on each one, but few of them had probability for success in his favour. Really, the best plan was the most simple and that was to tell the woman the truth.

It seemed like a terrible idea, but he knew that Integra trusted them. He also knew that she was a reasonable woman. If his argument was compelling enough, she would consider it. The main objective was to convince her that he wasn't going to lie for Ciel's sake, which seemed more troublesome than it should be, for some reason. Surely he had no real reason to vouch for the bluenette, but everyone else seemed to think he did. Really, he didn't want to think about that too hard. If he did, he may be overwhelmed with memory again, and that would be detrimental to this operation.

Regardless, he made his choice. Without informing the Watchdog of where he was going, he went to H.E.L.L.S.I.N.G. Headquarters in order to speak with Sir Integra. After explaining to her the situation, she simply leaned forward, staring at him with a questioning look.

"Why did you tell me this?" she asked. "You know that you could have just gotten Ciel in trouble, yes?"

"I felt as though it would be better to have your input on this." Alois stated in a matter-of-fact tone. "If Ciel goes in and does something stupid by himself, then we might never catch Wakefield. While I do agree with him that this is an excellent opportunity, I am aware of his status on standby, and also am not confident in his ability to fulfill the objective on his own."

Integra leaned back in her seat, staring intently at the demon in front of her. She did her best to conceal the fact that she was puzzled by the man's actions, but the fact that Alois ratted the Watchdog out remained. In all honesty, she wasn't quite certain as to how to interpret that. The amount of detachment with which the man spoke was a cause for deep concern, as ordinarily, Alois wore his heart on his sleeve. He thought about others, especially those he was fond of. Had his fondness of the bluenette waned? That was certainly a possibility, although Integra found it hard to believe.

"I believe..." she began, leaning forward while folding her hands on top of her desk. "...We must exercise caution in this case. I am still unhappy with the fact that he destroyed my possessions while he was here. He has proven that he is capable of acting impulsively without restraint in the very recent past, and while the investigation into the murder of that witch is starting to exclude him, that fact still remains. Sending him on a mission that requires such precision is, in a word: 'unwise'."

Alois did not falter in his expression, but nodded slightly to indicate he was both listening to and understanding what was being said. This aside, Integra didn't seem to be done speaking. She continued with: "Yet, considering the opportunity as well as his history of being proficient in his work under pressure… I will allow him to accompany you on this mission. However, on the condition that he pays me back for the damages on my home in addition to him being on his best behaviour. Both of these conditions must be met in order for everyone to come out of this alright. Am I understood?"

"Perfectly." the menace stated calmly. "If he fucks up, feel free to go yakuza on him and take a pinky."

"Worse could happen." Integra replied. "Keep him under control, or you might be the one losing more than a finger."

"Understood, sir."

"Good." Leaning back, the woman relaxed somewhat, despite being only partially satisfied with the other's response. Worry still lingered over the offer of mutilating the Watchdog by the Lion, but there was really nothing she could do about that. Prying in other people's personal affairs was not a strong suit of hers, and she wasn't casual enough with the demon in order to speak as anyone but his superior. "I will arrange backup nearby. Report here before going to the party. Is there anything else you wish to add?"

"No, sir." the menace answered, standing from his seat.

"Then you are dismissed."

With that, Alois turned and walked out of the room, taking care to shut the door behind him. His risk had paid off. He would have to report back to Ciel, despite his own wishes. Truthfully, the menace felt guilty for trying to manipulate Integra, given how good she is to them both. He felt worse about this than he did about ratting out Ciel. In a bizarre way, head of H.E.L.L.S.I.N.G. was the closest thing to a "mother" he had, ever since the Castle Krampus incident. That's most of what he could recall from that mission, in fact.

Continuing down the hallway, the man came across a certain angel, startling him as he turned the corner. His hand clutched at his chest as he was taken by surprise by Elizabeth, who did not seem very pleased. She stood with her arms crossed and tapped her foot. Alois' face went white as a sheet when he saw the woman's expression. She knew. Alois could tell.

"Come with me." she said, gesturing for the demon to follow. Wordlessly, the Lion did with his shoulders slouched like he was a kitten that had just been kicked. Weaving in and out of hallways, the woman finally arrived in a rather unsightly guest room and motioned for the other to step inside.

Splintered wood scattered the floor as chairs and tables lay in ruin. Mirrors were shattered on their vanities while broken glass and shards of ceramics were strewn about the carpet, sometimes hidden for some unsuspecting soul to step on in their bare feet. The only item that seemed out of place was a silk tie poking out from underneath the debris. Crouching down, Alois grabbed the fabric and picked it up. He felt as though he recognised it, but couldn't place it. In fact, he believed that he might have been the one who purchased it.

"I heard what you said to Integra." the angel said. "How could you be so cold?"

"What do you mean?" questioned Alois in a shoddy attempt to maintain innocence.

"The way you spoke about Ciel..." Elisabeth clarified. "It was distant. It was almost cruel..."

So Elizabeth hadn't caught on, it seemed. Still, the menace lowered his head. A sliver of guilt was rearing its ugly head from within him over the bluenette, despite not feeling it before.

"I'm sorry..." he said. "It needed to be done..."

Furrowing her brow, the lips of the woman pressed together in a thin line as their edges pointed downward. "Look at this room." she finally instructed. "This is what needs to be replaced."

Against his better judgement, the menace looked around, taking in the destruction once more while Elizabeth continued. "This is where Ciel was staying." the angel said. "He tore this room apart when he heard what happened to you. He was in turmoil- completely falling to pieces! In a way… He still is..."

"So?" the other shrugged, trying not to think about it.

"So Ciel cares about you." indignantly replied the woman. "How can the person who is most important to him talk about him so coldly? According to our records, you were improving… Why the drastic change?"

"Shit happens." Alois stated. "Sometimes, you just can't do anything about it. So what if I'm important to Ciel? I don't remember him. He's practically a stranger, so why should I act like best mates with him? It doesn't make any sense. Even if he cares, I just don-"

Before he could finish his sentence, a sharp sound echoed throughout the room and the Lion's cheek began to sting. Shocked, Alois stood with eyes widened and his face now turned to the side. Elizabeth's open hand lowered to her side as it slowly balled into a loose fist.

"Liar." she accused. "Look me in the eye when you say that and I might feel more inclined to believe you."

"You slapped me..." Alois mumbled absent-mindedly. On instinct, his own hand raised to brush his fingers against his reddened cheek as his head turned to face the woman.

"Wake up." Hellsing ordered. "Stop daydreaming about this world where your past doesn't exist. Stop trying to avoid it. It's not like you to run away from things. What happened? You were getting along so well..."

"Yeah, well maybe we weren't." the blonde harshly replied. "I can't help how I feel, and I don't want to be around him. He creeps me out and I want nothing to do with him. That's that." Folding his arms, he huffed.

"Did you remember something?" questioned Elizabeth. "Answer me honestly."

Raising his eyebrows, Alois looked surprised momentarily before averting his gaze. His cheeks turned pink as he frowned. "I don't know what that was." he said. "It's just… I don't like not knowing..."

The expression on Elizabeth's face softened at the admission, and her posture became less defensive. They were getting somewhere, at the very least. As expected, it was something significant that threw him off. From what he said, the woman could decipher that it was most likely a memory of a more amourous nature that he shared with the bluenette. Perhaps she had been too hard on the man. The thought caused her to sigh.

"I'm sorry I slapped you..." she apologised. "That wasn't right of me. I don't like seeing the two of you not getting along, so I was worried."

"You know something, too, don't you?"

"Yes."

"And you're not going to tell me, huh?"

"No..."

"Figures." Alois said, letting his arms fall to his sides. Turning, he walked over to the bed and sat down, treading over glass and splinters ground into the carpet. "Everybody knows everything and I'm the only one stuck in the dark. It's like everyone I know is in on an inside joke or something, but I'm not. It's worse than that. I've lost something important to me- to how… how I live. You could even say it's part of who I am. I want it back, but at the same time, I'm afraid of it. I don't want to touch it."

"Why is that?"

"Remembering might ruin what I have. I come from a world where happiness was hard to come by. Holding on to what little bit I had is all I could do, sometimes. Ciel, he… He does make me happy, but at the same time, he's scary. He makes me remember things that damage my current perception of the world. I don't like lies. I don't want to live in the dark forever, but… what if reality is worse?"

Those words practically caused the woman's heart to break. While they weren't related by blood, Elizabeth accepted the menace as a full-fledged member of her family, and cared about him accordingly. Never before had she seen the usually cheerful and caring Alois so lost, confused, and melancholy. His voice and his body language were completely abnormal. Everything about the man was wrong and it was all because of the fear and hopelessness of being trapped in a string of white lies meant to protect him, but now being afraid to seek the truth to what his life was like before.

She knew better. She knew of the happiness he once possessed. Every time Elizabeth made her weekly visit to the Phantomhives, Alois was always there, smiling from the bottom of his heart as he socialised with his family. She knew of confessions he made, speaking sincerely about how he was happy to a point that he still almost couldn't believe possible. He was content. He was joyful. He was loved and knew it, too. Alois knew it every single moment of every single day, but now, all of it was absent. More than that, he was unaware that it even existed.

Hesitantly, Elizabeth walked over to the bed and sat down next to the man, quietly pondering as to what to say to him. Before long, she settled on placing a hand on his shoulder. With that, she finally mustered some words.

"You're going to be okay..." the Hellsing offered, moving her hand in a soothing motion. "I still can't tell you everything, but I can promise you that you were happy."

"Are you sure?" questioned the menace. He was hesitantly hopeful while raising his head.

"Completely." Elizabeth stated as pure fact. "You were one of the most smiling people I know. Every time I saw you, you were smiling and laughing the most sincere of laughs. You even said so yourself that you didn't know that being that consistently happy was possible before then. There's nothing to be afraid of."

There was a pause before the blonde answered. "That doesn't mean the fear isn't still there."

"That's true." the other said. Silence pursued as she tried to think of something to say. "Want me to tell you something?"

"What?"

"Ciel says you're braver than he is." she told him. "I believe his exact words were 'he's braver than I, stronger than I, and more clever than I.' He probably feels very vulnerable without you."

"So?" questioned the menace. "What does that have to do with me being afraid? Are you saying that I shouldn't be scared because he's more afraid of me than I am of him?"

"Partially, but there's more to it than that. You were the only person to every soundly defeat him. Now, I wasn't there, but he says that he has never met a person who could compare to that level of cleverness in the hundred years he's lived since then. Ciel has nothing but admiration and respect for you. Even though you started out rough, one thing led to another and you became inseparable. That's why he can't leave you alone no matter how hard he tries."

Watching the woman's face, Alois stared intently while trying to decipher her words. He knew that she was still hiding things from him, despite offering him quite a bit of information. Alois was thankful, although filled with more questions than before.

How on earth did he meet the bluenette? If they were at odds, it had to be anything but pleasant. He didn't know how he "defeated" Ciel or why and he didn't know how they had become friends after that. This combined with his dreams became more discomforting, although what the other demon supposedly said about him somehow made Alois feel happy.

Why was that? Why did Ciel saying good things about him make him so happy inside? Moreover, he didn't know what all of this meant in the context of his dreams.

No. That was a lie. He had his suspicions. Yet, he didn't want them to be correct in case they impede things now. He doesn't want to have to live up to someone he used to be, since he didn't know if he would ever return to the man he was. At least to Ciel, that is.

Regardless, he had many things to focus on at once, so he needed to plan which one he was going to address first. Thus, he stood and straightened his clothes, soon followed by Elizabeth in his gesture. Turning to face her, he said: "I should go. I need to tell Ciel about what I discussed with Integra."

"That's quite alright. Go take care of what you need to." the woman said. Before Alois could leave, however, she stopped him. "Oh, Alois?"

"Yeah?" the menace asked, looking over his shoulder.

"I'm going to be at the Phantomhive estate tomorrow." she explained. "I need to talk to Ciel and make sure he's doing alright. It may be best if you weren't there."

"Fine by me." Alois replied. "I'll see if I can hang out with Kris, or maybe I'll take Luka out somewhere. I still have playground equipment I need to deliver."

At last, he cracked a small smile. It was insincere, but it was a start. He at least tried to lighten the mood, so Elizabeth rewarded him with an attempt at humouring him with a smile of her own.

"Once again," she offered. "I'm sorry about slapping you. That really wasn't right of me."

"Don't worry about it. I'm a big boy; I can handle it. You do have a very impressive slap, though. How many soldiers have you made cry with it?"

"Oh, only a couple."

"I don't believe you." Alois said, pointing his finger at her as to playfully scold her. He smiled as he turned to leave, but once the door was closed, it faded as he made his way back down the hall. Solemnly, he made his way down the hall and outside, where a car was waiting to take him home. He left Elizabeth there, alone in that room.

Watching after him, the Hellsing truly wondered if he was going to be alright. All she could do was hope for the best. Looking back at the bed, Elizabeth looked to see if Alois had left Ciel's tie, but it was nowhere to be found. She thought that the menace must have taken it with him in order to return it to the Watchdog. Surely, he did. But against her or anyone else's knowledge, it stayed with him. As he made the trip back home, it sat in his lap in the car as he rubbed the silk fabric with his fingers while lost in thought.

Alois had no knowledge of what was to come next. He didn't know what to expect aside from unrest, but knew that he desired to welcome it. Hesitantly, he craved what was to come, knowing it would be difficult. But the promise of something greater was hard to resist. Was he truly happy before?

Flipping up the collar of his shirt, the thin piece of fabric made it's way around his neck. A knot was expertly fashioned without the use of a mirror and the collar went back down. With a few adjustments, he was set and ready to take on the task that awaited him when he returned home.


A/N: I have returned! I am done with summer classes and am free. Free, I say!

At least for the second summer semester, that is...

Still, that's time to write more DLTP!

Damn, I want a popsicle...

Anyways, I need help. I think I mentioned this briefly in a previous A/N, and I've also mentioned it on tumblr, but for an upcoming arc, I need to figure out what the "Anti-Freak" organizations of the world are. I have like, three. One is my own invention, while the others are in the Hellsing universe. I've been running into trouble because obviously, there is a language barrier. I have no idea what other countries would name their organizations like H.E.L.L.S.I.N.G. and Iscariot. More importantly than that, though, I don't want to pull a J.K. Rowling and botch important cultural aspects or take a dump on a country's history.

Thus, I need help. If anyone has suggestions or ideas for an organization, please tell me. I will most likely use them and also give credit where it's due. Even if it's just a name. All I currently have are H.E.L.L.S.I.N.G. for the United Kingdom and B.I.G.F.O.O.T. for the United States. Iscariot has jurisdiction over Italy and either has jurisdiction over, or at least a prescence presence in a few countries where the majority of the population is Roman Catholic. As for everyone else, there's absolutely nothing!

What do you do in Canada? Hit up the U.S. and hope we're nice enough to send somebody?

If anyone has ideas, feel free to send them to me via comments, PM, or Tumblr. This is your chance to go crazy and invent some shit. Even the people who run the place.

Anyway, that's the biggest thing. I'm not sure if this arc is near done, so there's time.

Ah... How am I gonna finish this shit?

I must focus...

Until the next chapter, my duckies~!