A/N: Oh I'M SO SORRY for not updating sooner! I really don't have any excuse but that I'm lazy. PLEASE FORGIVE ME! I had to completely change my previous A/N because I haven't updated this fic since the 4th Happy Potter movie came out, and I was still debating about watching Narnia… which was EONS ago. Anyway, I've been working on "A Call" a little bit here and there over the long hiatus I've been taking, and I'm happy to say that I'm a bit happy about where this fanfiction is going. I'm sorry, there'll be no Draco in this chappie either, but I promise for him to make his grand entrance next chapter. : D I'm so thankful that you guys are still reading this fic, I'm overwhelmed with you guys' support. /hugs/ So, I'm hoping this'll be worth the long wait. Love you all!
Oh, and before I forget… special thanks to Pluto because if it wasn't for me stumbling over her review saying "Please please update!" and my very… uh… persistent, beta pestering me about updations to no end, this chapter would probably have never been created.
yoshi09
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"L-Lavender… I didn't think you'd be here so… so… early-!" Hermione said, fumbling over her words. Lavender stood behind her, sunglasses pushed up like a hair band in her blonde locks, sporting a singular rolling suitcase and Chick bag that had matching sequins to her jeans, and to complete the look, a slinky tank top. It wouldn't take an idiot too long to know Lavender had somewhat been influenced by Pansy in the wardrobe. Hermione silently hoped it was the only thing that Pansy changed in Lavender. One Pansy was enough, and she wasn't looking forward to half a Pansy stuck in a brainwashed Lavender. "I thought you were coming tomorrow?"
Lavender's mouth twisted to a pout, "I'm here for you, 'Mione. You'd think you'd be a little pleased… and besides," Lavender continued, "I made it very clear to Harry not to spill that me and Pansy wanted me to come as soon as possible since you so apparently lacked fashion sense which got us worried and decided needed immediate attention. And anyway, knowing you- you'd split if you knew I was coming."
Great. Just what Hermione needed- a Pansy with brains.
"Oh," Hermione chuckled uneasily, "Is that right?"
"I'm just glad I came while you're still sane… I mean, for a moment, I thought you reached 'the-point-of-no-help' when I heard you were in the library and I nearly panicked… then I realized going to the library on a perfectly young weeknight is what a sane Hermione Granger would probably do." Lavender gave Hermione a pitying look while Hermione promptly returned it with a scowl. "Thank Merlin I came on time to help you with your mental fashion illness!"
"I already went and got help from professionals about my mental health," said Hermione calmly. "They said I'm 'beyond hope' and that 'a homicidal maniac has better chance at recovery' than me. They also suggest I try staying away from anything that might cause anxiety attacks. Such as anything annoying, colorful, and lack dignity… per se, Pansy's FASHION SENSE." Hermione finished, enunciating her last two words.
Lavender stared at Hermione for a few moments as if trying to register what she just said. But then Lavender retorted smoothly, "I didn't know you had a sense of humor, Hermione. You continue to surprise me."
Hermione huffed under her breath in response.
"Relax, 'Mione. I'm not Pansy. I've a bit more dignity than her- now come on and bring me to your living quarters around here." She smiled and placed a hand on Hermione's elbow and jerked her arm up, causing Hermione to almost drop the manila folder in Lavender's haste and unceremoniously toppling Hermione (cold coffee and all) down on the ground. Lavender "tsk-tsk'd" and then practiced a well-performed scourgify on the ground to clean the coffee before helping Hermione up and leading her outside of the library. "I assure you my sophisticated yet sexy look I've got planned for you is perfect. You can pull it off."
"Your outfit seems to say differently."
"Oh," Lavender started laughing, "Pansy bought this tank top for me… asked me to try it out. I thought it was okay, although a lot of chest is exposed… is there a draft in here? Slightly cold. "
A few teenage wizards stopped to gape openly at Lavender as she and Hermione walked by.
"And these kids. I mean, honestly, where are their mothers? I didn't think Hogwarts was on holiday until next week. I mean, I know I look good, but this is just ridiculous." Then noticing one cute 6th year who was staring at her, she threw a casual wink causing the boy to crash into a pillar in front of him because of it. Lavender smirked. "Hormones, I swear."
"Maybe the fact your breasts are spilling out of your tank top might contribute." Hermione remarked dryly.
"Oh. That's odd. They didn't do that before."
Hermione rolled her eyes as Lavender stopped in the middle of the walkway to "stuff" her breasts back into the tank top, earning them a bigger male audience.
"They don't pop out too much, right, Hermione?" Lavender bent over to show Hermione, but she had already moved ahead of her.
"Are you trying to give a show or help me with 'fashion'?"
Lavender blinked. "Excuse me?" she asked as if oblivious to her own actions. She regained herself quickly from her previous "shock" though when she saw Hermione stop in front of an unmarked door, with a rusty knob, obviously her room which happened to be in the busiest hallway of the living quarters. Lavender quickly sidestepped next to Hermione and grabbed her gently by the elbow with her one free hand, and ushered her away from the door and deeper into the hall. Hermione opened her mouth to protest that they passed her room, but the subtle look that Lavender threw her quelled her need to ask; Lavender was leading her somewhere and obviously didn't want anyone else to know where.
"Let's visit Ginny first?" said Hermione in a seemingly normal voice, but Lavender caught the flash in Hermione's eyes. Lavender knew Hermione well enough, having shared a dorm with her in Hogwarts, to know that when her eyes flashed she usually meant something else than what she was actually saying. Hermione wanted to know where they were going.
"Have you talked to Parvati lately…?" Lavender said impishly.
Hermione's footfalls slowed down considerably and she looked behind her to her room. It seemed so far away now.
- - - - - - - - - -
50 minutes later found Hermione apparated away from the safety of the Ministry to trying various brand name robes in the largest bedroom she'd ever been in with an even larger wardrobe connected to it. Clothes were lain across various types of furniture and a large pile of dresses were starting to form on the queen sized mattress, that truly looked to be fit for a queen with it's stylish embroidery and see through hangings. The large curtains across the room were thrown aside for a breathtaking view of the countryside and a few other mansions scattered down the way, the moonlight filtering through the room's spotless windows. Opposite the window to the other far wall was a balcony that overhung an old looking brick path that led to an equally beautiful garden; a light mist flowing over the greenery from a large fountain giving it an almost surreal appearance. Hermione felt like she had been plucked out of reality and dropped into a dream.
Pansy Parkinson truly was living in luxury.
"Oh Jesus, this is short." Hermione commented distastefully, looking at the knee length skirt she wore in front of the wide body length ornate mirror in front of her.
"Herm, that skirt screams sophisticated yet sexy. Besides, it's only knee-length," replied Lavender gently, absently magiking Hermione's hair into various hairstyles while Hermione scowled at her reflection, "and everything else in Pansy's closet doesn't… really, per se, scream your area of expertise." Lavender looked pointedly at the discarded black lace lingerie at the foot of the bed.
"I'd have to agree with the young miss, dear," replied the mirror in a grandmotherly fashion to Hermione, "The skirt looks glorious on you."
"I might as well be wearing her bikini and thongs. Watch this." Hermione made a full 360 degree turn and the skirt whirled so high it showed her pink and green-polka dotted panties in all their feminine glory.
Lavender rubbed her temple sheepishly, "Well, look on the bright side, the skirt brings out your better half."
"One more comment like that and I'll tell Zacharias Smith you've gone lesbian." Hermione said warningly.
"Oh, Herm, don't tell him that! Last time you did that Zachy came with a bunch of his cronies flanking his sides drooling. It took me ten weeks to convince them I wasn't a porn star giving out free demonstrations!"
The bushy-haired woman smiled, "Shouldn't have tried to get me into that purple bikini." Hermione had already started stripping out of the flowy skirt and looked up at Lavender, "Ask Parvati how the 'quest for modesty' is coming."
Lavender shifted from her position on her stomach on the squishy reclining chair to look at Parvati's form in the closet who was too deep inside to really hear Hermione and Lavender's conversations. Her best friend was practically having a fiesta in the wardrobe, pulling out various clothes in a fury of a well brought up shopper at a buy one get one free sale. "How's the quest for modesty coming, Parvati?" yelled Lavender.
"Fantastic! I can't believe Pansy has Laury Ticklefoot robes! They're absolutely bloody amazing!"
"Laury Ticklefoot? Those are worth 100 galleons!"
"I know, isn't it great?" called Parvati.
"What year are they?"
"Oh Merlin, I can't believe I forgot to check, but the fabric feels like unicorn tail…" There was a three second pause as Parvati checked the robes, followed by a squeal of appreciation, "Year 1602! They're over centuries old! These must be worth a thousand-"
"Galleons!" Both Parvati and Lavender finished together.
"Wait! And it says they were owned by… by… Sorceress Salyta! We studied her in our 5th year, remember?" yelled Parvati. "She must've been GOR-Gee-ous!"
"Sorceress Salyta? Who'd want to wear her robes?" said Hermione loudly.
"Who WOULDN'T?" Parvati retorted, carefully looking over the sew work.
"Wasn't she the whore that sucked men's souls out of their nostrils to make concoctions that castrate males under the age of 99?" Hermione replied, earning her two glares.
"Well, I'm sure she was a very intelligent witch then," defended Lavender.
The yelling conversation continued, and only after Hermione tossed the skirt disdainfully, did Lavender stop their conversation as she managed to catch the skirt with a practiced Wingardium Leviosa.
"Well, keep looking for Madame à la Perfection brand… or Effleurant! Keep us posted, Parvati!"
"So anyway," continued Hermione, "enlighten me on whose bright idea was it to raid Pansy's closet?"
"Pansy suggested you do that," said Lavender, pulling a Honeydukes lollipop in and out of her mouth, "Draco always seemed to take a liking in Pansy's clothing. And you, have to dress to impress… these lollipops make the most glorious popping feeling on your tongue." added Lavender as an after thought, taking the lollipop completely out of her mouth to examine its texture.
"But Pansy dresses just enough to border legal! For God's sake, she wore her leather mini and spiked boots to the local children's hospital last June when her nephew got sick!"
Lavender sighed, "Hermione Granger?"
"What?"
"Look at me. Good. Now remind me why I flew all the way back from California."
"Because Pansy sent you."
"For?"
"Helping me choose clothes to impress Malfoy."
"Draco." Lavender corrected.
"Draco." Hermione repeated half-heartedly as she sprawled down on the polished wooden floor.
"Which means…?"
"Dragon or Snake in Latin-"
"No, I mean, which means no matter how much you whine, I'm what until you do what?" Lavender said.
"You're stuck here until I'm done packing."
"Good. Now you realize I'm missing on a very good vacation."
"I wish I can say the same." Hermione sighed, looking up at the ceiling.
"Let's get going then. Parvati!" Lavender called back into the closet, "How's it coming?"
"Wonderous! I got a next batch all ready for a Miss Hermione Granger!"
Hermione rolled over. "Noo…."
"I don't care, Herm. You've got to be eye-catchy, witty, stylish and pretty."
"Thanks." Hermione murmured.
"Oh, Hermione, I didn't mean it that way!"
It was nearly dawn when Hermione's intended two suitcases suddenly tripled to six (overstuffed as well). Hermione had always been a light packer, but Parvati had insisted she bring more clothes for the month she was to stay on the tour.
Hermione wasn't at all pleased. "But Parvati, why can't I just shrink these suitcases-"
"No! Some of these robes are unshrinkable because of their old age and fragility, I won't have any of it!" Parvati huffed, zipping up the last of the suitcases and buckling them securely.
"Make sure you get the case of shoes attached to it too," said Lavender.
"Honestly…" Hermione murmured. There are only three things Hermione didn't understand about the world- The Quantum theory, Ron Weasley's logic, and women's obsession with shoes.
As soon as Parvati was done wrestling with the stainless steel locks (metal locks rusted), she turned around to Hermione, and nodded approvingly at her outfit she currently exhibited- dark jeans that hugged her wide hips and slimmed down the length of legs, a bronzed belt slung from the left side of her waist in a diagonal so that the other side of the belt loosely touched her right hip which broke up the plain light brown tank top that accentuated her slim figure. After outfitting Hermione in so many types of clothing, they deciding Hermione looked better in neutrals than in outrageously hot colors that Parvati and Lavender usually preferred, and therefore settled with packing simpler clothes for her daily outfits. Parvati smiled gently, Hermione really did have subtle otherworldly beauty that caused the clothes to wear her as an accessory since she made them look good… if you moved that mass of hair of hers out of her face anyway. Lavender was pleased with Parvati's handiwork, and that was saying something- Lavender was a bit hard to please. Hermione herself had glanced at the mirror more than twice (A hard feat to cause Hermione to do), and Parvati had caught her small smile of approval with the outfit- it wasn't much, but it lighted her face with an elegance that you'd find on people wearing the most expensive silks and dress robes.
"…so remember to give us a call, and owl Parvati if an occasion arises…" Lavender was saying to Hermione as Parvati looked her over.
"I will, I will."
"Now here's my card," Lavender handed her a small white business card, "Keep in touch, all right? We need to make sure you're wearing the right things if something important comes up. You look gorgeous."
"I feel bloated in this top."
"That's a temporary feeling, M'dear," replied Lavender.
"Now you remember what we taught you about walking in heels during Yule Ball, correct?" Lavender said, rummaging through her purse again.
"Yes, that I embarrass woman kind and should never try pursuing such a feat again because Hagrid could probably walk in heels better than me-"
"No, no, I mean after you got the balance part of the deal right."
"Hermione rolled her eyes, "Do I have to?"
"Yes!" remarked Parvati, "Every girl should have this song in their head when walking in heels!"
"I doubt every girl sings, 'I'm too sexy' when they walk in heels, Parvati." Said Hermione defeated.
"I agree, but they all should be. It builds self-confidence and makes the woman believe what they say, therefore becoming one with the… with the sexy, I suppose." Parvati retorted, which earned her a glare from Lavender.
"Parv, the way you talk just convinces Hermione more of why she SHOULDN'T sing it." Lavender turned back to Hermione, "Let me see you do it again, and I want you to sing the lyrics out loud." Lavender said.
"I refuse." Hermione replied.
"Don't be stubborn!" Parvati and Lavender yelled back together.
"This is ludicrous," Hermione crossed her arms- a defensive stance both Parvati and Lavender had seen way to often.
"Do it! It's the 'walk' that gets to the 'talk' which leads to the 'rock' in the bedroom, Love."
Hermione made it a point to look away from them.
"Fine! If you won't do it, I will." Remarked Parvati in a huff.
"Oh, by the beard of Merlin, no!" whispered Lavender in a rush. Everybody knew Parvati couldn't sing. She whirled back to Hermione, who looked as wide-eyed and fearful as Lavender, but Hermione quickly recovered by scrunching her eyebrows in sheer determination of maintaining the pride she was infamous for. "Hermione!" Lavender cried.
"No!" she replied, "Never again. I forgot the lyrics, anyway."
"Well, you heard it!" said Parvati, "Maybe if I sang them to you, you'd remember-" Parvati took a deep breath, "I'm toO sexy fOr mY sh-"
Lavender immediately clapped both hands against either side of her head and yelled over Parvati's screeching voice at Hermione, "Good grief, Granger!" Lavender turned a hurried glance at Parvati who was about to put more emphasis on how off tone she was. "For the sake of all of us, just DO it."
"Shiiiiirrrrrtttt… I'M A MOOODEEELLL-"
Hermione, whose ear drums were protesting so loudly even her stubbornness was overridden screamed, "All right! I remember! For the love of GOD, I remember the lyrics!"
Lavender immediately pounced on top of Parvati, and placed two hands over her mouth. "What was that?"
Hermione stomped her feet which made her look very much like a three-year-old in tantrum. "OKAY."
Lavender let go of Parvati, who squealed in delight, which was an improvement from her previous shrieking.
"Now you remember?"
"Yes, yes." Hermione retorted in irritation.
"Okay, but when you do it, I want you to do everything we've taught you to do in your head out loud, all right? Do it right the first time, and we won't ask you do it again." Lavender said.
"All right…" Hermione rolled her eyes. She then positioned herself several feet away from the two best friends. "Okay," she breathed slowly, "Shoulders back," Hermione rolled her shoulders back with her words, "Feet forward, and knees relaxed but not sloppy," she followed her words as she said them, "Poise and head held up high but not like a horse, but as if you were a princess that everyone respected…"
Hermione gave an inquiring eye at Lavender as she said cautiously, "Arms are relaxed and at your side, not floppy but poised and aligned with the imaginary 'grace line,' give them a swing, but overdo it and fail…" Lavender gave a nod to assure Hermione she was doing it right so far. Then, quoting Parvati in perfect word-for-word Hermione style, she said "Then walk. In a straight line, but not quite." Hermione felt her right foot move over and in front of her left, her feet were currently barefoot, but her body automatically raised themselves slightly on tippy-toe- a sign of constant (and vigorous, if you will) training of walking in heels by Parvati and Lavender, "You are a predator, and you own the savannah."
She breathed in deeply again. "You take your time, and etiquette is scarcely a necessity… you make your own rules, you are your own woman, and every woman…" Hermione hardly noticed she was two feet away from Lavender and Parvati now, "… is unique. Every woman's walk speaks volumes about their personality- about the prowess and femininity within."
"Sing it."
Hermione gave a sharp glare at Lavender but began (very clumsily), "I'm… too sexy for my love… too sexy for my love, Love's going to leave me…"
"Oh honestly, Hermione- get to the part we TAUGHT you."
"I loathe that-"
"I don't care. Is this mission all about you? What will Draco think? Remember it's the walk that leads to the talk that leads to-"
"OKAY! You don't have to repeat that cheesy line again." Hermione inhaled sharply and said in a monotone like tumble that didn't quite match her walk, "I'm a model. You know what I mean. And I do my little turn on the catwalk-"
"Are you singing or talking? And you're not moving with your words!" said Parvati in warning. "I could always demonstrate-"
"Yeah, on the catwalk!" said Hermione a little more enthusiastically, "On the catwalk yeah…" Then biting her lip she gave a roll of her hips, "I shake my little tush on the catwalk!"
"That's the spirit!" Parvati said in cheer.
"Okay, I'm done." Hermione huffed, and then crossed her arms over her chest again as she sat down on Pansy's bed.
"Admit it, you were enjoying it."
"Hardly." Hermione sniffed.
"I think she's ready," Parvati whispered.
"Oh, Heavenly Hufflepuff, I honestly hope so… " then as an afterthought, Lavender added, "She's as ready as she'll ever be."
A/N: woohooooooo yay another chapter done! And Drakie-poo will make his entrance next chapter! Thanks for remaining so "loyal" to the story by reading it… if you're an anonymous reviewer, please remember to leave your e-mail so I know how to contact you if need be. I love you all! Constructive criticism is a must!
