So What If You Catch Me?
Chapter Four
"Every girl has that one guy she always goes back to, heartbreak after heartbreak. And nobody knows why, not even herself."
Naruto stared out the window of his kitchen. His heart breaking for his best friend. He watched her have a sliver of happiness the night before just to watch it all come crashing down. The blonde gripped his cup tighter looking down at the milk inside. No matter how hard Sakura tried she couldn't help herself from having a soft spot for the Uchiha. No matter how much time had passed or how much he had hurt her she would always forgive him. Allow him a spot back in her life.
It killed Naruto knowing there was nothing he could do. Nothing Ino could do. Nothing any of her friends could do. It was entirely up to her to move past Sasuke and fully let him go. Naruto looked up towards the door way to the kitchen hearing a loud groan that belonged to the Uchiha. Naruto frowned. Almost for a moment last night he thought she had made the decision to fully move on. He had never seen her interact with a man like she had with Neji. But of course, Sasuke always had to ruin everything.
Both Sakura and Naruto's smiles had vanished from their faces. The fun of their dinner with the Hyuuga's was completely gone. Replaced was the feeling of helplessness. Sasuke sat against their front door. His head leaned against the door frame. He wreaked of alcohol. In his hand was a bottle covered by a paper bag.
"What is his problem?" Sakura scoffed. Her brush it off demeanor didn't fool Naruto. He could see it written all over her face that she blamed herself.
"Sakura-chan…" Naruto said softly, and Sakura turned her face away from him to save face. She didn't want to be affected like this. She didn't want this man to control her. She didn't want him to have so much power over her and her emotions. Sakura bent down in front of the dark-haired man.
"Sasuke," she whispered, she nudged his shoulder lightly hoping that would wake him up. Sakura looked behind her to Naruto for his help. She turned back around to see Sasuke watching her. "Sasuke are you okay?" she asked. Sasuke's eyes wondered from Sakura to Naruto. His eyes slowly traveled back to hers. Sakura felt her face flush. His eyes bore into her. It made her stomach turn. If only Sasuke had looked at her this way years ago. It would be a different story. She had to remind herself. He only wants you when you don't want him.
"Sakura," his voice came out huskily. His hand traveled up her arms and he pulled her into him. His chest was strong, his arms warm. She wanted to give in. Just accept him. Maybe it would be okay… she couldn't bring herself to enjoy it. He smelt of smoke. He smelt of alcohol. There was no happiness in this. There would never be. He held her tight and she felt his body start to shake with sobs.
"I love you," she stared at the door in front of her. Her arms still at her sides. She couldn't return his hug. She couldn't return his love… this wasn't love. Love didn't make you feel like this. "Please… I love you," he continued to cry. It wasn't often… this didn't happen every week. But this Sasuke was the Sasuke they saw more often now. Desperate to not be alone. If he had to feel this way all of those around him had to feel that way as well. Thankfully Naruto stepped in and grabbed under Sasuke's arm.
"Come on Sasuke, let's get you into the house," Naruto said bending down and pulling Sasuke to a standing position allowing Sakura to slip away from the dark-haired man. Sasuke leaned into the blonde stumbling into the house and through the hallway and to the living room. Sakura looked down at her hands. She couldn't hug him. She didn't want to. He was hurting… but he had hurt her.
"Naruto…" Sasuke mumbled as Naruto helped the Uchiha stumble down the hallway and into the living room. Naruto laid Sasuke down on the couch. "I'm so sorry. You deserve a better friend." Sakura followed behind the pair stopping to stand in the doorway of the living room watching the pain on her best friend's face. "I shouldn't have done that to you. Please forgive me…" Sasuke pleaded.
"I forgive you Sasuke," Naruto said defeated. The blonde undid his top button on his shirt trying to relax slightly. "I forgave you a long time ago Sasuke… stay here I'm going to get you some water," Naruto walked past Sakura and to the kitchen. She followed behind him, her own tears making their way down her face.
Naruto sighed opening the cabinet and pulling out a glass and filling it with water. "Hey," his soft voice broke Sakura out of her trans. "You okay?" he asked gently reaching out to touch her arm. She brought her hands up and covered her mouth to silent the sob that came from deep in her throat. Naruto set the water glass and wrapped his arms around his best friend. He held her close as she sobbed. He placed his chin on the top of her head. How had the perfect night come to this? Things had finally felt like they were moving forward and here they were thrown back into the shit again.
"Why?" Sakura asked through her sobs. "Why does he do this… why can't he just let me be," she gripped Naruto tightly before moving away from the blonde. She took in a few deep breaths and tried to calm herself. She wiped angrily at her face trying to dry the tears. Furious with herself that they were even there.
"Maybe you should try talking to him?" Naruto suggested and grabbed the glass. Sakura nodded.
"I'll try…" she whispered. She felt broken. Beaten down. Not in control. How many times would she have to talk to him? How many times would they have to go through this back and forth game. The two moved into the living room. Sasuke laid on the couch, his eyes closed and still wet from his emotional outbreak. Naruto sat the water down on the coffee table and moved to sit in the corner. Sakura sat down on the ground next to the couch and reached out to Sasuke. "Hey…" she whispered. She brushed a piece of his hair out of face. Her hand glowed green and she worked on helping him with the headache that was wracking his brain.
It killed her seeing him like this. Through this whole war. The whole battle. She had hope. They had hope that Sauske was still there. The young boy who was their best friend. True a part of him was still there. But there was another side. The bitter Sasuke who had not had his revenge. The defeated Sasuke. The boy who had to drink away his sorrows. He was just as broken as they all were but instead of dealing with it, he caused more harm.
Sakura jumped when a hand reached out and brushed her new tears from her face. Her green eyes started into his dark eyes. "Did I make you cry again?" his voice held so much pain, she leaned into his hand and closed her eyes a few more tears fell from her eyes. "I'm such an idiot…" Sakura felt her heart speed up. Then there was the anger. The hate. The hate he had for himself. For all those around him. "I always do this to you… make you cry…"
Sakura opened her eyes as Sasuke shifted and moved to the floor with her. He used both of his hands to cup her face and moved into kiss her. "Please… please don't," she whispered. She didn't want this. He needed to know. He needed to understand this had to stop. She felt his hands on her tighten before releasing. "Did he treat you good?" he sounded bitter. Of course, Sakura had done him wrong again.
"Who?" she said, her voice stronger. Her anger was coming back.
"Hyuga," Sasuke said, his hands in his lap clenching and unclenching. He reached out and grabbed the water cup. Sasuke looked at Naruto and the two stared down. Naruto's blue eyes clashed with his dark ones. He wasn't leaving and Sasuke needed to understand. Naruto had reached his ending point on this argument. Sasuke didn't like this. He just wanted to talk to Sakura. Make her see. Understand. She was meant to be with him and only him. "I saw you two…" Sasuke took a sip from the glass before looking back at Sakura. His eyes bore into her and she felt guilty.
She felt like she was a little kid caught stealing cookies from the cookie jar. She felt like she had done him dirty. She was the one in the wrong. No. That's not true… Sasuke wasn't her husband. She didn't owe him any explanation. "You know I love you Sakura," his voice was so sweet yet so condescending. She let out an unwanted sob. He didn't deserve her tears. Her emotions. "Please… don't cry anymore,"
"I can't help it," she got out through deep breaths. "It's excruciating. It hurts every time you say it," her eyes finally met his again. Tears streaming down her face and this time she did nothing to stop them. This time she didn't break away. "Every time you tell me you love me, I feel like I'm being stabbed," Sasuke looked away. "I love you Sasuke," she whispered, and he turned to look back her with shocked yet hopeful eyes. "I do. I can't deny that. I love you more than word can say…" she could feel her heart hammering in her chest. "But I don't want to be in love with you anymore," she moved her legs under her and stood up. "So please Sasuke. Let me move on. Let me be happy," she turned away from him and made her way to the door way.
"Sakura," she stopped in the doorway. She didn't turn to face him. "Does he make you happy?" she could only assume he meant Neji.
"Yes," she whispered. The room was silent. She didn't know what he was thinking what he was going to do. She had to be honest with herself. She had to give herself the chance to move on.
"I won't give up," Sakura sighed. She left the room and made her way to bed.
A loud groan brought Naruto out of his thoughts of the night before. A loud thud sounded through the house. Naruto brought his cup of milk up and chugged the last of it. He stood up grabbed his cup and placed it in the sink before moving from the kitchen and into the living room. Sasuke was laying on the ground staring up at the ceiling. His legs propped up on the couch. Naruto leaned against the door frame and folded his arms across his chest.
"Did I make an ass out of myself last night?" Sasuke asked looking up at Naruto. Naruto let out a sigh before moving into the room. He sat down next to Sasuke and threw his legs up on the couch and leaned back so he was shoulder to shoulder with his best friend.
"Yeah," Naruto said. He was in over his head with this. Sakura was right. He had always played the middle ground between the two of them. Never taking Sasuke's side but then never taking Sakura's side.
"Damn… is she—"
"She's at work," Naruto said. Sasuke nodded moving to sit up but stopped when Naruto reached up and grab his friend's arm. "Where you going?"
"Uh… I was going to go get flowers…" Naruto sighed sitting up.
"Sasuke, you gotta just take a step back. Give her some space. She's at work." Sasuke nodded before standing up. Naruto sighed to himself. He felt like he never really got through to his friend.
"Thanks for letting me crash here," Naruto nodded standing up and following Sasuke toward the front door. "Hey Naruto…" Sasuke said quietly once he had reached the front door. "I meant what I said last night. I really am sorry for what I did… to both of you. I really don't deserve you,"
"Sasuke… it's in the past. Let's move forward. That's what we all want." Sasuke nodded before leaving the house shutting the door behind him. Naruto sighed. He wasn't sure how else to help.
XXX
Sakura growled out annoyed. She was having the worse day she had ever had. Maybe that was extreme considering she had restarted hearts on a battle field. However, she had already been thrown up on twice and today was just not her day. She let out a sigh hopeful to just reach her office so she could work on paperwork the rest of the day. She peeked into her office nothing was out of place. No flowers delivered while she did rounds. Maybe… just maybe Sasuke was going to listen to her.
She let her shoulders relax and she shut her office door behind her. Running the hospital has been a privilege and a large stressor in her life. She had been ecstatic when Tsunade had offered to be second in command with Shizune. The two kunoichi had come leaps and bounds building the medical staff. Their success rate had increased, they had also created an emergency clinic right next to the main gate perfectly staffed and ready for any emergency.
Sakura glanced at the clock above the door. It was almost 1600. She had plenty of time to finish up her expense reports and the work on the 'suggestion box'. Sakura took a seat at her desk and kicked off her heels. She brought up one of her legs and stuck it under her back side and let her other leg swing back and forth. She had decided on a tight black skirt that went down pass her knees and a short sleeved red top. Her hair up in a bun.
A knock broke her from her thoughts but only enough for her to mumble out an 'Enter'. She was rolling through all of her paper work. She had finished last month's expense report and reconfigured her budget for the next month coming up. She had also finished signing off on all the pay roll check. She was on fire! She had just moved on to her 'suggestions' which were a total joke.
She rolled her eyes at the next 'suggestion' she pulled out. "High heels are not proper attire. No matter who you are," If it was good enough for her teacher it was good enough for her. She heard the door open and close. She pulled out another suggestion which was about hiring additional staff for Fridays. She nodded and placed that in her to do stack. "See it isn't that hard to come up with a good idea," she mumbled to herself.
"What's the idea?" Green eyes widened and her head shot up so fast to meet his eyes she was sure she had given herself an injury. He was stunning. Even in his jonin uniform Hyuga Neji was something to behold. Sakura's face flushed red.
"Neji-san!" she said standing up. "What are you doing here?" she felt herself stuttering over her words.
"I stopped by your home to see if you were there, Naruto said you were still at the hospital," he said calmly.
"Oh," she said she looked over at the clock and was surprised to find it was 2100. No wonder she was breezing through… it had been hours. "I hadn't realized what time it was. Was there a reason you were looking for me?"
"I don't have an excuse as to why I'm here," he said. Sakura was slightly shocked at his answer. Looking him over and studying his body language she could tell he seemed to be just as nervous as she was. She smiled softly. "Other than… I wanted to see you," he whispered out the last part. She felt her heart hammering in her chest.
It was so odd that he could pull this side out of her. She felt giddy. She wanted to scream. She wanted to hide away. She felt sweaty and hoped to god he couldn't tell how insanely nervous she was. Maybe this was it? Maybe she could just take a leap of faith. Maybe she could get over Sasuke. Move on completely.
"Oh," she finally managed out.
"May I walk you home?" he inquired she smiled and stepped from behind the desk.
"Let me grab my coat," she said walking over to the couch to grab her white coat that was laid across it.
"Uh, Sakura…" Neji chuckled slightly. "You're missing your shoes," he said pointing down at her bare feet. Her face turned bright red before running behind her desk and slipping her heels back on. She threw her coat over her shoulders and grabbed a stack of her handy work before walking to meet him. She smiled up at him. Even with her heels on he was a good head taller than her.
"Thank you," she smiled when he opened the door for her. She locked the door to her office and the two made their way out of the hospital. She had never been more excited to have the cooler weather. Her face felt like it was on fire. It was about a block away from the hospital that Sakura had the realization that Sasuke had not sent her flowers at all the entire day. It was shocking that he had gone the whole day. She could only hope that this was the start of something so much better for her. She looked up and noticed that Neji was looking at her questioningly. "Sorry," she said softly. "Had something on my mind."
He nodded. At the same time both stopped and an ANBU appeared in front of them. "Hyuga-san, Hokage-sama has requested you," Neji nodded and the ANBU was gone.
"I apologize Sakura,"
"I'll walk with you. Some of these are for Tsunade-shisou," Neji nodded and the two changed course for the Hokage tower. "Did you have a mission today?" Sakura inquired.
"No, just some training with Tenten. We usually make a point to train once a week together," Sakura nodded.
"How's Tenten?" Sakura hadn't gotten a chance to see the weapon slinger in some time. The girls always talked about planning a girl's night but hadn't made solid plans with training, mission and family life all the girls had stayed busy.
"She is well,"
It wasn't long until the two found themselves in front of Tsunade. Sakura placed her papers on the desk and moved behind Tsunade. Sakura sat on the ledge of the window she stared out at the city for a moment before turning back and looking at Neji. She was completely blown away by how handsome he was.
"It's a simple mission," Sakura heard Tsunade said before she turned to look back out the window. "You can take Sakura," The pinkette looked over at the two hearing her name.
"What Shishou?"
"Were you listening?"
"Ahh," Sakura's face turned bright red.
"Neji can go over the mission details. The hospital will be fine. I'll cover for you while you're gone. It'll be good for the kid to try and hold things down for week," Tsunade smiled as if she already had a plan to completely stress Naruto out while Sakura was gone.
"Hai Shishou, good luck with the trainees. They're more helpless then I was," Sakura smiled knowing how much her teacher hated dealing with some of the catty young medics. Sakura swung her legs over the edge and then was gone. In a moment Neji was right next to her and the two made their way back to Sakura's home. "When do we leave?"
"First thing tomorrow. We will be transporting a merchant to Ami. It seems to be a weapons transport, so they need a jonin team," Sakura nodded. "Have you left the village since the war?"
"Twice," Sakura stated. "They were for diplomatic missions though. This will be my first mission in a while. It will be nice to get some time away,"
"I've thought about stepping down from team leader," Neji said. Sakura's eyes widened and she turned slightly to look at him. "We can talk more about it when we get back from the mission,"
Sakura nodded. "Who is on our team?" Sakura asked seeing her home come into view. She let out a breath she hadn't realized she had been holding once she knew Sasuke wasn't waiting outside the house for her.
"Lee and Yamanaka Ino," Neji stated. Sakura let out a small giggle.
"Should be fun for you," she said pulling out her keys and sticking it into the door turning the lock.
"I'll get to spend more time with you," the wind whipped around them and for a moment Sakura thought she hadn't heard him quite right. He reached out and touched a piece of her bangs and pushing them to rest behind her ear. "I'll see you at 0800," and he was gone. She blinked a few times before her face turned bright red and she leaned again the door frame. Her heart pounding in her ears.
A/N
Oh I had such a fun time with this chapter. I really enjoyed writing Neji. I just feel like he would be so direct and forward while also being very nervous. I really like the more serious aspects of this story as well. I like exploring a more serious side of relationships. Please let me know what you think! This rewrite is actually going to have a few more chapters then the last time I posted since I'm adding a mission into the story so I hope you'll enjoy the extra bits of NejiSaku Thank you all for the wonderful review you've left me! Until next chapter!
