Huge thanks to Poppy-Robins089 (I'm so happy you like it so much!) and VolvicBabe!
I planned Carys' age so that she would be his age over New Moon and part of Eclipse, but what do you all think? Should I bump her up so she's older than him physically?
Chapter 4
It was nearly three weeks after they began dating that Carys cracked.
Carlisle dropped her back home after they'd had coffee in the same small cafe they'd visited four weeks previously, and left her with a brief hug before heading quickly back to his car - as had become his habit.
It was as if he didn't want to be seen with her - or visiting her, at the very least.
The other four times they'd gone out, she'd waited and waved him off, but that day she pulled her keys from her bag and let herself in before he was halfway down the driveway.
She couldn't explain to herself what it was that had triggered it, but something had changed that afternoon, and she could no longer ignore things as she had because she wanted to think he was perfect and normal and everything she'd dreamed of.
Dropping her bag in the middle of the floor, Carys crossed to the sofa and pulled her notepad and pen from the coffee table, beginning her list before she could let her rose-tinted glasses slip back into place.
1. Carlisle is cold, often freezing but it doesn't bother him
2. He's physically hard
3. He has the same eyes as all his children
She noticed that last as she thought back to her interactions with Alice and the day in the forest when she'd met Emmett. It wasn't just with Rosalie and Edward - if it was, she might have put it lower on her list.
4. His tiredness runs in a two-week cycle
She paused, tapping her pen against the paper as she tried to remember what else was bothering her. None of those things was the something she was desperate to identify.
5. He's never kissed me
That one was more of a personal note, but it stayed in case crossing it out might stop the flow of her list.
6.
She pressed her knuckles against her jaw and stared at the list, the feeling her mother called the source of her compulsion rising from her stomach.
She thought of it more like a feeling of anxiety than compulsion, but she knew it wouldn't go away unless she continued. If she was going to have answers, she needed to have things to ask about.
6. He looks too young for his age
7. Camping trips (?)
8. His family is too perfectly beautiful. All of them?
9. He doesn't want to be seen with me?
10.
Carys' pen fell from her fingers as she stared unseeing at the blank television screen in front of her.
Sometime later, she recollected herself and scrabbled around for her pen on the floor, filling in the one part she'd been ignoring more than the others. The something she'd noticed at the cafe when he'd turned to glare at a couple of hikers making comments about her skin.
10. People are scared of him
That night when Carlisle called, Carys didn't answer.
She was too confused, too wrapped up in her thoughts, too anxious.
She wanted answers, but the more she thought about things, the more she added to her list. The more she added to her list, the less... Well, the less sane she felt.
Did she really want to ruin things by accusing him of something she had no idea of, had no name for? Was this her mind running away because she was finally with him after loving him for so long or was she right and it was something more?
Surely, she thought to herself as she curled up in her bed and ignored the second call half an hour later, surely I should have some idea of what I'm suggesting?
She sat up quickly, reaching across to the notepad on her bedside table.
23. Edward - saved Bella. Not a scratch. Rosalie was angry. Why?
24. Rosalie - the record cover - was that her?
Carys threw her notepad back onto the table and laid back, staring at the ceiling as she reached across and turned her phone to silent, cutting off the incessant ring of the third call.
She knew that last point on her list was a stretch - more than a stretch, it was definite proof she was seeing too much into things - but she'd thought about it once and dismissed it, so it went on the list.
The next day, she called in sick to work.
And the next.
And the one after that.
When Sarah let herself in on the evening of Carys' third day of self-isolation, she found Carys on the sofa looking about as sick as she'd lied to Sandra that she was.
Carys cursed giving Sarah a spare set of keys as she flipped the notepad she'd been studying over and turned to look at her.
"You know you should have called me, don't you?" Sarah asked her, placing her bag on the coffee table and sitting down by Carys' legs. "That is one of the perks of having a best friend. You look like shit by the way."
"I've had food poisoning," Carys lied, rubbing at her tired eyes as she sat up against the arm. She hadn't slept much over the past few days. Her exhaustion and lack of appetite were part and parcel of her obsession with documenting everything she could think of, everything she'd missed or willfully ignored over the past year of knowing Carlisle. "Dodgy chicken."
"You told Sandra you had fish," Sarah corrected her as she opened her bag and pulled out a bottle of wine and a box of chocolates. "You'll need to remember that when you go back on Monday."
Carys stared at the wine and turned a small frown on her friend. "What's this for?"
"This is, in my opinion, an excellent way to start to feel better." She rolled her eyes as Carys continued to frown uncertainly at her. "It doesn't take a genius to recognise what's going on when your friend suddenly takes time off work and then a certain handsome doctor starts anxiously asking you if you've heard from her. What'd he do?"
"Nothing," Carys defended immediately, "I mean-"
"Yeah, you screwed yourself there. So..."
Carys just about resisted the urge to glance at her notepad and instead looked at the closed curtains.
"Nothing, I just... I don't know." She couldn't exactly tell Sarah about her suspicions. That would just confirm she was going mad. "I-" she turned back to Sarah and noted the sympathetic look on her face. "-we had an argument," she lied, inwardly sighing her relief when Sarah's brow creased and she reached over to pat her on the knee.
"I thought so." She stood up, giving Carys space as she grabbed her bag from the table. "Drink the wine, eat the chocolates, watch a sappy movie, and take tomorrow. I told Sandra that Mon saw you two days ago and it was a pretty shit piece of fish, so you'd better remember that before I get into all sorts of trouble." She waited for Carys' nod before she lifted her bag onto her shoulder. "You know where I am if you need me, but I figure you get one pass per couple of years and you haven't filled your quota yet." She paused, leaning down to give Carys a pat on the shoulder. "Just let me know if you don't want to be alone."
"Thanks, Sarah, you're a good friend," Carys informed her, knowing that it came nowhere near what she and Monica were.
"No," Sarah responded with a wink, "a good friend would tell you that you've nabbed the second best looking doctor in this place, and ask what happened. A better friend would pull out two glasses and force you to spill. I got you a week off work and the whole bottle to yourself. I'm the best."
Carys surprised herself with a laugh and stood up to see her out.
"Oh," Sarah informed her with a slight wrinkle of her nose, "and as I'm such a good friend-"
"I know, I probably need a shower."
"I was going to say you need to open your curtains and get some light in here," Sarah chuckled through her faint grimace, "but now you've told me that, I'm not gonna ask for a hug!"
The next morning, Carys stood back and surveyed her handiwork.
After dutifully watching finishing the entire bottle of wine as she watched The Holiday, she'd had her best night's sleep that week and woken up with the urge to clean.
Three hours later, she was the proud daughter-of-the-owner of a sparkling house and the regular owner of a mass of damp hair falling across her shoulders and back.
Sarah had been right about the curtains as much as the wine, and Carys felt better for having light back in the place. It made the room look far better than it had before she'd opened them, at least.
She was about to make herself a cup of coffee and continue to try and ignore the notepad she'd left open on the coffee table for a little while longer when the door knocked.
She crossed the room before she thought better of anyone seeing her looking far less ill than she supposed she should do and opened it to find the one person she'd been hiding from standing on the other side of the door.
"You've made a list," he told her, tilting his head a little to look past her shoulder. "May I see it?"
Carys blanched, suddenly feeling a little light-headed as she stared up at him. "How... How do you know that?"
Carlisle's gaze met hers, and she was struck by how... Sad he looked.
"If I promise to tell you what I can, would you show me?" He asked quietly.
Carys glanced at the table behind her, at the notepad that still laid open. She couldn't read a word of the writing. How did he know?
She turned back to him as her heart beat wildly, so strong that she could feel it, could hear it in her ear. A muscle twitched by her eye. Her breath came fast and shallow.
"How did you know?" She repeated softly, eyes widening.
"I didn't at first," he relented, "I thought... I thought you were avoiding me."
"I was," she confirmed, her breath stuttering as she realised she'd spoken aloud.
Carlisle inclined his head. "You were avoiding me because of the list."
"How-"
"Alice," he conceded, lowering his gaze as he slid his hands into his coat pockets. "Alice told me."
"Did she-?"
"No." Carlisle shook his head. "She hasn't been in your home."
"Then-"
"No, she can't read minds eithe-"
Carys gasped, eyes widening in shock as he spoke. She cut across him. "How did you know I was going to ask that!?"
"Would you let me read it, Carys? You have my word I'll answer your questions as much as I can."
He sounded so calm that Carys felt... She didn't know... She felt as if... As if she wanted to agree...
"You won't hurt me?" She asked him hesitantly, speaking before she could stop and think about how silly it was to ask that of someone who knew exactly what she was thinking.
Carlisle looked as if someone had punched him in the gut. He took a small step backwards and froze, falling silent for long seconds before he seemed to pull himself together.
"I would ne-" he cut off, shaking his head, horror widening his eyes. "I would never hurt you my love. Never. The-" he broke off again as Carys stepped to the side and opened the door so that he could enter.
She wasn't sure why she was letting him in, but there was something in his eyes and tone as he'd spoken.
And she trusted him. God love her for a fool, she thought to herself as he passed her, she trusted him.
She pressed her back to the door, the soft click of the latch loud in the quiet of the room as Carlisle crossed to the coffee table and picked up the pad.
Number 31 came to mind.
He walks so quietly.
Carlisle flicked through the long list, darting Carys a glance as he returned the pad to the table. "Very... Comprehensive."
"You couldn't have read it that fast," she replied, pressing her hands flat against the door behind her.
"I think you might want to add that to your list. May I?" He didn't wait for an answer before he lifted the pad and pen and scrawled across the bottom of a page, reading the words aloud as he did. "Forty-five, speed reading." He paused for a moment and seemed a little reticent as he continued writing. "Forty-six, speed in general."
"You're..." Carys pushed slowly away from the door and followed in his footsteps, coming to a halt at the end of the sofa where she sat on the arm. She felt faint again. "You're adding to it?" Her brow furrowed as she spoke, her words laced with confusion.
She felt a strange relief that he hadn't immediately dismissed her, or worse. Instead, he was watching her patiently, waiting for her reaction to each word as if he was as afraid as she was.
"Would you like me to confirm any of these?" He asked finally, holding the notepad up between them. He stepped away as Carys took a deep breath, clasping his hands behind his back in an effort to appear non-threatening.
"... Are any of them... Wrong...?" She asked quietly, trying in vain to control her shallow breath.
Carlisle shook his head slowly.
"Who... Who are you?"
Carlisle took another step back, and another, until he had his back to the wall. "You really should be asking what I am," he told her carefully.
Carys drew in a shaky breath, her lungs constricting as she nodded slowly. "Okay... What are you...?"
"I can't tell you yet," he explained, continuing on quickly when Carys scoffed, "if I told you, it would put you in danger as much as my family... I can, and will, answer any questions you have, but I simply can't name what I am. Not until I know what your choice will-" he stopped, his head dropping to his chest.
"You can't name what you are!?" Carys grasped her indignation like a shield. "What are you? Rumplestiltskin!?"
Carlisle's chuckle cut off abruptly at the look on Carys' face. "No, but... I'm..."
"Are you human...?"
She'd dismissed the idea each time her mind came to it over the past few days, but now...
"I haven't been for a long time," he conceded.
Carys lost control of her breathing completely, moving from the arm of the sofa and adding to the space between them.
"How-um. How long?"
Carlisle's hands twitched as he brought his arms to his sides. "Carys..."
"How long?" She repeated slowly.
"Almost three hundred and forty-two years," he conceded quietly, "I'll be celebrating my three hundred and sixty-fifth birthday in a couple of days."
"Wha..." Carys' mouth opened and closed a few times as she tried to work out what to say. She cycled through more emotions in the minute she stayed silent than she could fully register. In the end, doubt and anger won out. "What the fuck? Sure you are. Cool. Okay, so this is what? Some sort of horrible joke? It's a bloody long time to set up a fuc-"
"I can show you proof," Carlisle cut in calmly. He turned to look around the room again and pointed to the small table by the stairs. "How much do you like that mug?"
"What?" Carys frowned, shaking her head at him before glancing to her left. "The mug?" When he continued to stare at her, she shrugged, watching him warily. "It's not a favourite... Why, what're you...?"
She gasped in shock as Carlisle appeared to flash across the room and back. The fact he was now holding the mug was the only proof she had that she'd not lost her mind.
He held the mug out with both hands and slowly pressed them together, crushing the object. Taking a step forward, he leaned across to the coffee table and watched her as he let the dust of her former mug fall through his fingers.
"So... Not... A joke then..." She whispered, almost too quietly for her to hear over the thudding of her heart.
"No," he agreed, then suddenly he had the notepad in his hand again. He wrote something quickly and then hesitantly stepped towards her until she could reach across and take it from him.
Her head swam as she stared at the paper in silence.
47. Strength
48. Enhanced hearing
She looked up at him slowly as she gripped the notepad as if it were a lifeline. "You can hear...?"
"Everything," he completed as she trailed off. "I can hear your heart, your breathing, your footsteps... It's usually very... Comforting to hear you."
Comforting...
It was comforting...
"Carys..."
Carlisle's voice barely registered as the notepad fell from her hand and she stared at him in shock. She knew he was speaking because his mouth was moving, but she couldn't hear a word of it.
She felt something cold against her arm and looked down to see Carlisle was supporting her as his other arm snaked around her waist.
He guided her to the sofa, sitting down on the coffee table in front of her as he gently rubbed her upper arm and tilted her face up so that he could look into her eyes.
Carys' mind whirled through every note she'd made, everything he'd confirmed, everything he'd added...
Then, finally, she thought of the Carlisle she knew and the time they'd spent together over the past year and more. She thought of the man he was. The lives he'd saved. The fact she had nearly fifty items on her list and only one was truly negative.
"Carlisle...?" She began slowly as he gently stroked her jaw, "I think... I think I'm ready for that explanation now..."
To be continued...
