"Why do you look like you didn't get any sleep at all last night?"
Penelope gave Aaron a tired look as she shrugged her shoulders. "I actually ended up falling asleep on the sofa after we ended our call, since I was comfortable at the time. But that was not very good for my back, or for getting good sleep. But if I have a nice, warm, malleable, body pillow tonight, I might be able to repay some of my sleep debt. Do you happen to know of anything or anyone like that?" she teased as they went inside the restaurant.
"I think that I can come up with a pretty good solution, if you're up to spending the night at my place."
She tapped her chin with her finger as she pretended to think about it. Aaron arched an eyebrow as they approached the host podium, and she finally relented, giving him a small nod. "I think that could be arranged."
A quick smile flitted across his face before he gave her a firm nod. The host let out a low chuckle as she showed them to their table, and Penelope gave her a small wink before taking a seat across from Aaron and picking up her menu. There weren't very many vegetarian options available to her, so she tried to find the best sounding option out of the three that she could eat. Unless she had the chicken option, but even that didn't sound the best. Sighing a little, she finally chose the first dish she had read about, and set the menu aside so that she could look at him. There was an air of sadness about him, and Penelope reached across the table to caress his hand as she continued to gaze at him. "I'm fine."
"If you were fine, I wouldn't be concerned, Aaron. What's eating at you?"
He set aside the menu, about to tell her something when their server came up and asked for their order. After giving it to her, Aaron took a deep breath and then sipped at his water. "I've been looking for a way to talk about this without hurting you." She frowned, wondering where he was going with this, but waiting to hear him out. "I need to take some time and go with Jack on a small vacation. It will be a year since we lost Haley in a few weeks, and I feel like I've been pushing him to just keep moving forward, and he needs some time to just be a kid. And I want it to be just the two of us, since we're going to talk about Haley. Will that be all right?"
She knew that it had taken a lot for him to open up like that, and she gave him a small nod. "That will be fine. You and Jack need to take all the time that you need to learn how to live with Haley's death, and this time of year will always be hard for the both of you. Especially since it's so close to Jack's birthday, as well."
"I knew that you would understand, Penny," he replied as he turned his hand over and clasped hers softly, giving it a small squeeze before pulling away and picking up his water once more, as if he needed that small bubble of space between them. "So, in a few weeks, we'll be away, and I'll try to call you a few times while gone, but it will be spotty."
"Okay. And this just means that I get to hang out with my friends a little more while you're gone, and not feel guilty about spending time with them."
Aaron gave her a look, and she blushed when she realized that she had perhaps tipped her hand about wanting to spend more time with Erin, and she knew that was still a sensitive topic with him. "Well, when you get together with JJ, make certain you tell her hi from us."
"Of course I will!" Penelope was relieved that he automatically thought of Jayje rather than Erin, and she picked up her water glass and took a long drink before smiling up at their server as their food arrived. The meal passed quickly, and Penelope tried to keep their conversation light as they ate, not wanting to have things veer towards the topic of Erin and how close they were becoming. "All right, any other things I should be aware of?"
"We're going to be moving back into the house once we're home from this trip. There's a guest room that could be permanently yours, if you want."
Penelope swallowed quickly, feeling the bite of food tickle her throat and causing her to cough as she stared at him. That was definitely not what she had been expecting, and she gave him a small shrug before reaching for her water glass and taking a few sips in order to stop the coughing fit. "That is not something that you can just shove on a woman, Aaron. You'll have to give me time to think about that, okay?"
He nodded in response. "I know, that's why I brought it up the way I did. You can take as long as you want to give me an answer, I just want you to know that that option is on the table, if that's what you want." He gave her a tense smile, and Penelope wondered when she had made a misstep. He knew that she was jumpy about that level of commitment, but this was not something that should have bothered him this much.
"I will definitely think about it, Aaron. It might be longer visits at your home until I take the plunge. After all, we might not get along well when I'm in your space all day, every day. Even I know that I can be a bit much."
"You're perfect the way that you are. I would never ask you to change anything about you."
She sighed with pleasure as she nodded, pushing the plate aside and leaning back in her chair as stared at him, a smile on her lips. "So, I was thinking that I could perhaps get a back rub from you, since I have this ache that I just can't seem to shake. And we'll see where things lead from there. Hopefully to something rather enjoyable, but maybe just sleep."
Aaron laughed as he shook his head a little. "Sleep sounds pretty good right about now, honestly. That case in Indiana just did a number on my mind. You think that you see everything in our line of work, until you see what a combine does to a body."
"There was a reason that I didn't look at a lot of the pictures from this case, Aaron. There are only so many things that I can feed into my brain until I feel like I'm going to go off the rails." She let out a long breath before biting her lip. "At least that last woman was able to go home to her daughter?"
"Yes, though I doubt she'll ever be the same again. I wish that there was a way we could help out the survivors of unsubs, especially those from lower socioeconomic situations, since they'll be less likely to get their feet back under them. But instead, we just slip in and out of lives and are left to wonder what happens. But we know, more than the others, what the effects of violence is on a person."
She nodded as she reached across the table for his hand once more. "We do, along with Reid. And you're right, I wish that there was something more that we could do for them, but there's not a good solution to the problem. We just have to hope that they have a good support system in place." Aaron frowned slightly as he tightened his fingers around her hand, and she knew that he was struggling with the feeling of being inadequate. A part of her wondered if some of that stemmed from the fact that Foyet had been able to get to him twice after escaping custody, playing him for a fool, even though no one on the team would think of it that way.
"If only everyone had someone like you in their lives," he whispered.
"Even Strauss?" she replied, pushing her luck by bringing up her name during their time together. Aaron's frown deepened a little as he tried to pull his hand away from hers. "No, Aaron. If you truly think that everyone deserves to have someone like me in their lives, you have to include her. It's only fair and right. Yeah, she's been a bitch in previous years, but people change. Look at me! At least I am over my all black phase of life. Though it might be fun to resurrect the Black Queen for Halloween one of these years. I'd love to see how everyone reacts to seeing that side of myself."
"It's still hard to believe that you used to be like that, yes. It might be fun, though, to show Jack that side of you, or at least how you used to dress. I don't want him to get any hacking ideas from you." Penelope giggled as she shrugged. "What?"
"I don't have to look like her to teach him my tricks. If he's adept at coding and all that, we could have a budding little hacker on our hands. And if you let me, I can guide him into how to do so appropriately and not get his name on a shortlist of people feared by the NSA." Penelope gave him a sunny smile before letting go of his hand, allowing him to pay for their supper as she thought about the night ahead of them.
