Lucy rises up from the darkness, "So, I take it none of you liked the last chapter." she folds her arms across her chest, "Well, good thing this wasn't made for you. And thanks to one rude reviewer, guest reviews will no longer be tolerated."

Havoc Your Way

"So hang on, you guys had an entire two-parter without me?" Lincoln asked as he and Grim walked into Royal Woods Mall.

Grim shugged, "Hey, we didn't know if you wanted to go to the Underworld or witness someone dying."

Lincoln paused a moment, "Well, when you put it like that..."

"There will be more two-parters Lincoln... now can you remind me why you're bringing me here?"

Lincoln groaned at the malaise, "C'mon Grim, we needed to get out of the house. Did you want to stay cooped up with Lola demanding playtime?"

Grim wistfully looked off into the distance. The sounds of Lola's tantrums could faintly be heard. Grim shuddered and shook his skull, "Good call, mon. So, what store should we hit first? Or did ya want to go to the movies or arcade or whatever it is kids do these days when their eyes aren't glued to their phones?"

Lincoln pulled up his smartphone, "Actually, I figured we can start by introducing you to my friends!"

"I already met your friend. Clyde, wasn't it?"

"Yeah, but you haven't met the rest!" Lincoln showed Grim his phone screen which had a picture of himself, Clyde, Rusty, Liam, Zach, and Stella in their Action News Team pose.

"You have more than one friend?" Grim asked, a bit astonished.

"Uh, yeah? Of course I do! Why are you surprised?"

"Eh, you'd be surprised how many people have one real friend while the rest of their friends only hang around when it benefits them."

Lincoln tapped his chin, "Well Rusty can be a- I mean, I know my friends don't like some things I'm into but we all like hanging with each other!"

"Hey Lincoln! Over here!"

Lincoln and Grim spotted Clyde waving them over, the rest of Lincoln's friends with him. The two headed over, Grim frowning a bit, "Great, an afternoon with you, Clyde, three gingers, and your girlfriend."

"Yeah!" Lincoln then caught the last item, "Wait, girlfriend?"

"Glad you can make it, buddy! And good to see Grim too!" Clyde greeted.

Rusty walked up to Grim and looked him up and down, "Who's the geek in the costume?' he asked.

Grim magicked up his scythe, "Call me a geek again and find out."

Stella pulled Rusty away, "Rusty, that's Death himself! You know, like what Lincoln and Clyde were telling us!"

Rusty blinked and did a double-take, "Sorry man, I thought the whole Death thing was a dumb joke! I'm Rusty Spokes by the way!"

Grim put his scythe away and sighed, "I'm never gonna get used to people being indifferent about my appearance."

Stella gave Grim a shy smile, "Well...I do know quite a bit about supernatural phenomenon. I'm Stella Zhau, pleased to meet you!"

"The name's Liam Hunnicutt, and I see plenty of death on the farm." everyone gave Liam a look. Liam raised his eyebrow at them, "What? Where do you think beef, pork, and poultry come from?"

Zach eyed Grim suspiciously, "I'm Zach Gurdle...you don't work with the government, do you?"

Grim shook his head, "No mon, not since Oppenheimer."

Lincoln smiled, "Well, that's everyone! Now for a nice relaxing day at-"

Suddenly an explosion rang out.

"...of course, I can't just have a calm day." Lincoln complained.

If you did, there wouldn't be a chapter.

The explosion came from a nearby clothing store, where a group of golden mannequins ran out carrying bundles of clothes. Leni ran out after them, "Tanya! Why are you doing this? Where did I go wrong?" she cried out.

"Hey look, isn't that Lynn?" Clyde asked, pointing at Lynn being surrounded by golden bears.

Lynn beat her chest, "BRING IT ON!" and the bears jumped her creating a huge ball of violence.

"That's wild, golden bears haven't been seen in Michigan for decades." Liam pointed out.

Grim frowned and tapped his jaw, "T'is ain't natural, but it feels very familiar..."

"Long time no see, Grimmy." announced a smooth sultry voice.

Grim and the kids turned to see a gorgeous blonde Greek woman wearing a toga around her shapely figure. She stepped over in red heels.

Grim pointed at her with a glare, "Eris! What are you doin' here?"

The woman laughed, "A-hahahaw! I was drawn to the chaos this town has! I mean, not long ago some crazy mortal wanted to destroy this entire town just to create a SIXTH great lake! I wish I could have been behind that!'

The plot of that stupid episode would've made a lot more sense if she had been, that's for sure.

Grim narrowed his eyesockets, "Are you here just to assault me vision with your hideous figure?"

Eris tsked at him as she shook her head, "Your taste is as rotten as always Grimmy. Humanity meanwhile is crazy for me, and I have the creepy fan art to prove it!"

Eris pulled out an ancient vase with an archaic version of her painted on it. A priceless piece of artwork for sure. She threw it at Grim's skull and it shattered.

Lincoln cleared his throat a few times, "Uh Grim, who is this?"

Eris bent her figure over provocatively to meet Lincoln's eyes with a big smile on her face, "I am Eris, Goddess of Strife, Discord, and all-around Chaos! Isn't it apparent?"

Lincoln blushed a little and tugged on his collar, "Oh! Well, nice to meet you, I'm-"

Eris straightened herself up with a laugh, "Lincoln Loud of the chaotic Loud House, I am well aware. Big fan of all the messes you made, you even nearly destroyed a township in Scotland!"

Lincoln sank a little in shame, "...don't remind me."

"Oh, I will every chance I can get! But why bother dwelling on the chaos of the past when we can always make more?" a golden apple appears in Eris's hand.

Rusty walked up to her with hearts in his eyes, "Golly ma'am, you're pretty!" he stammered.

Eris giggled, "Oh my, thank you! I was just looking for a big strong boy to help carry my golden apple."

Rusty held out his hands, "I can do that!"

Eris dropped the apple and it turned into a golden cow, crushing Rusty into the floor. "Thanks a ton sweetheart! That's a load of bull off my hands! A-hahahaw!"

Somewhere, Luan cringed.

Liam observed the golden cow, "Hot buttered corn! A golden cow! Does it give golden milk?"

Hot buttered corn? Did I write that?

Eris nodded, "Well, I have bigger fish to fry. Are any of you children interested in causing some discord and destruction?" she asked.

"Uh...no." Clyde answered.

"No way." Zach answered.

"As much as I want to destroy any idiot who uses the term Filipinx...no." Stella answered.

Eris smiled, "Good. I wouldn't have let any of you dorks upstage me anyway! Ta-tah!" the Goddess waved as she walked away from the children. The sounds of destruction following her.

Lincoln turned towards the Reaper, "Grim, we gotta do something!"

Grim nodded, "Indeed. Let's get lunch!"

...

Soon enough, Grim, Lincoln, and Lincoln's friends were in the food court eating tacos. Lincoln suddenly stopped and set his taco down, "Wait, no, we gotta do something about Eris!" Lincoln announced.

"Do we have to?" Grim asked.

Lincoln gestured over to the fires, firemen fighting fires, firemen on fire, and firemen starting fires, "Do you want all this to get worse?"

Stella looked up from her taco, "Wait, Eris is causing all of that?"

"Why are we still here with all those fires?" Zach asked.

Rusty chewed up what he had and swallowed, "Well, these tacos are to die for so whatever happens, happens."

Grim grinned, "I'm glad you're so accepting."

Lincoln put his hands on the table, "Grim! You have to agree this is getting out of hand! My life is chaotic enough without the literal Goddess of Chaos around! You must know some way we can stop her!"

Grim shrugged, "There's no point in going after Eris. Especially since she's right behind you, mon."

Lincoln turned around to see Eris right behind him, chewing on bubblegum.

"Believe me mon, I've tried everything. Eris is a force of nature and a bad habit."

Eris started blowing a bubble from her pink bubblegum. The bubble started to nearly touch Lincoln's head when suddenly Eris's head spontaneously popped.

"What the what?" Lincoln asked.

Eris's hands took the bubble and put it on her neck and the bubble popped with her head back in its place. "Thanks for ruining the surprise, Grimmy." she said as she took a seat on the table and put her heels up on Grim's skull.

I mean, where else was she going to sit?

"Uh, pardon me saying this ma'am, but we are currently using this here table." Liam pointed out.

"Well, I guess we'll just have to share then." Eris remarked.

Clyde let out a sigh, "At least all of our food was off it."

"So... why are you over here? I thought you were going around spreading discord and destruction?" Stella asked.

Eris groaned, "I got bored. What's the point of doing so much work if nobody is around to appreciate it?"

Zach looked over at the people fleeing in terror, "Might be hard to appreciate it when they're running away."

Eris tsked and folded her arms, "Excuses...well, I guess messing with old Grim here will be good enough for me."

"What's your deal with Grim anyway?" Lincoln asked.

Eris shook her head, "Oh, he's just jilted because of all the-" her head suddenly transformed into Grim's likeness, "-natural law and order-" her head then transformed back, -junk he keeps going on about and I fly right in the face of that. What's yours?"

Lincoln shrugged, "Well, my sister won his friendship in a bet and he's pretty much living with us now."

Eris held her hand to her mouth, "PFFFT! Oh my me! So, he's like, your pet now?"

Grim shoved her feet off and pointed at her, "Never call it that! I still got some of me pride!"

Eris kicked Grim a few times, "Not enough to refrain from breaking the rules of nature, are ya Grimmy? Welcome to my level!"

Rusty was sweating a bit, "Man, do I want to be Grim right now."

Liam gave him the side-eye, "Boy, I worry about ya."

Eris got off the table and kissed Lincoln on the cheek, "Thanks for that kid, I'm so happy I could start a war! In fact..." Eris summoned a big apple of discord and skipped away giggling.

Everyone looked over at Lincoln who had become frozen stiff.

"Gosh Lincoln, you're lookin' redder than a ripe tomato." Liam observed.

"Lucky guy, why does he get all the attention from girls?" Rusty remarked.

"Because he's easy to like, unlike some guys." Stella answered.

Clyde poked Lincoln a bit, "Uh, hey buddy, are you okay?"

Zach recoiled a bit, "Wait, was that lady an alien? She stunned Lincoln with her paralyzing saliva!"

Grim scoffed, "He'll be fine. Eris has that effect on people."

...

Luan was watching TV when the picture suddenly changed to a news bulletin.

"We interrupt this program for shocking news! One stupidly rich celebrity is suing another stupidly rich celebrity yet again! Also, California has seceded from the union and has sent troops to annex Nevada sparking a second Civil War! Now back to your scheduled brainwashing."

Luan looked over at you, the reader, "What? You expecting me to make a joke about this? I don't have to -BLEEP-ing impress you."