Chapter 17 A Plan

Kyle and Stan stood their by their lockers, the two bags that Cartman had given them by their feet, they were smiling at each other, one of those smiles that let everyone know they had something between them. Of course, no one knew what it was, it could have been a dirty secret, they could be up to no good, but alongside no one knowing, no one cared either, They just went about their usual school day not really giving a damn.

"Stan?" Kyle spoke up

"Hmm?" Stan replied

"My Butt is sore" Kyle Giggled

Stan burst out laughing, as did Kyle. "Well I'm not surprised, dude. It got a little over-worked last nigh, I think" A few girls walking past as Stan said that gave them funny looks. Stan stopped laughing instantly

"Don't worry, I don't think they know anything" Kyle winked and chuckled

"Hey dudes" Kenny chipped as he walked over.

"Hey Kenny" Stan and Kyle replied in unison

"What happened to you yesterday Lunch, Stan?" Kenny asked

"Oh, I was just checking something out. I had something planned for Kyle and I last night you see, and I had to make sure everything was perfect"

"And…?" Kenny enquired

"erm…yeah, everything there was fine, although the evening was even better with Kyle there, the sex was good too." Stan slipped out, not realising what he had just said.

Kyle gave him a surprised look

A grin made its way across Kenny's face. "You didn't?"

Stan turned bright red, as did Kyle

"You DID!" Kenny responded in shock. "Christ you guys move fast!"

"Keeenny! Shut uuuuup!" Stan spoke quietly

Kenny lowered his voice and smirked "I getcha" he smiled "still not ready eh?"

"No, It's just no one else's business" Kyle replied.

"Sure. I understand. Been there, done that, too poor to buy the t-shirt and all that" Kenny chuckled. He noticed the bags by their feet as Stan and Kyle leaned up against their lockers "What are those?" he asked, pointing to them

"You know how Cartman has cooked up this so called 'Clever' plan to get what ever he wants out of Stan and me?" Kyle asked

Kenny nodded in reply "Mmhmm?"

"Yeah well, his ingenious plan is to make us do his homework. He is so lame sometimes" Kyle answered, rolling his eyes

"That's all? Jeez, I'd have made you do a lot more than that. I'da been asking for favours, if you know what I mean" Kenny smiled playfully at the two of them

Kyle laughed a little "Yeah, but you've got a reputation of being a complete pervert and a total whore to keep up"

"Yeah, good point" Kenny smiled

"Hey Kenny" a random Girl approached him "If you ever get board of the little blonde kid, you give me a call, right?" she asked, handing him a bit of paper with her phone number written on it

"Anything for you, sexy" he squeezed her butt-cheeks and gave her a peck on the cheek

The girl looked pleasantly surprised, smiled at Kenny then ran over to her group of friends.

Stan smiled and looked down at Kenny's hand with the piece of paper in it "You gonna call her?" he smiled

"what makes you think I won't?" Kenny smirked

"You have Butters?" Kyle responded

"Yeah. Good point" Kenny shoved the paper back into his pocket. "I'll see if Butters is up for a threesome later"

Stan and Kyle both burst out laughing, out of shock more than anything else, Kenny just stood there smiling. "Heads up guys, here comes your favourite person"

Stan and Kyle, still laughing, looked down in the direction Kenny was pointing to see Cartman heading towards them with 2 more carrier bags this time. "Fat retard" Kyle chuckled, trying to get his laughter under control

"Well well, what's this, meeting of the fags?" Cartman asked as he walked up

"Something like that" Kenny replied

"What ever." He gave the two bags to Stan and Kyle and took the others off them "There you go arse holes. that ought to keep you busy"

"More homework!" Kyle said in astonishment

"No, you guys are going to help me sell these DVD's."

"You have got to be fucking kidding me." Kyle said "Cartman, we don't know anybody who would want these."

"There's a list in the bags of who normally buys them off me."

Kenny was staring down at the bags thoughtfully.

"Cartman, this is what's called illegal" Kyle shoved the bag given to him in his locker and closed it quickly

Kenny's expression went from thoughtful to smug.

"What are you smiling at, arse-rammer?" Cartman turned to Kenny

"Wouldn't you like to know." Kenny replied, still bearing his grin

"Whatever" and with that Cartman left

"Arsehole" Kyle mumbled

"Yeah, who does he think he is using us like this! This isn't fucking on." Stan complained.

"I have a plan" Kenny said "we need to go somewhere more private though. Come with me" Kenny started jogging down the school corridor. Stan shoved his bag of DVD's in his locker and they both followed him down the hall way.

They went down the hall, up a fight of stairs, then carried on down the second floor corridor, eventually ending up at the school library where Kenny came to a sudden stop, and walked calmly in through the doors, giving the librarian a polite smile and nod as he walked past her, sitting at her desk.

Stan and Kyle were close behind him. They walked in to the library calmly and finally caught up with Kenny who led them over to the quiet study area of the library and they all sat down around a table. Kenny got some books out of his rucksack to make it look like they were working.

"What's going on Kenny?" Stan asked

"You guys wanna way out of Cartman's little scheme without doing anything illegal and without him having any evidence what-so-ever about what he caught you guys doing?"

Kyle and Stan nodded in unison

"He's just given you nearly everything you need" Kenny Smiled

"He has?" Stan asked

After a few seconds Kyle's eyes lit up. "Oh yeah!"

"What?" Stan really didn't know what they were talking about

"Don't you get it? Making pirate DVD's is illegal. He takes a video camera into the back of the cinema, films the movie, and then he downloads the film onto his computer before burning the DVD's. We can hand the copied discs over to the police who'll arrest Cartman, when they examine his computer, they'll find all the evidence they need" Kyle beamed.

"Yeah but, the problem is, well already know that he's bound to have more than one copy of the film he made of us" Stan still didn't sound convinced

"Leave that to me" Kenny replied "I'll get it for you. But I may need the use of one of your computers for that"

"why?" Stan asked

"Ok, what I'll do is I'll 'borrow' a spare hard drive from the electronics store. Kyle, you're good with computers, right?"

"Yeah" Kyle replied

"I'll 'break' Cartman's computer and suggest he makes you repair it. Are you familiar with a process called 'Ghosting'?" Kenny asked

"Yeah, of course. It's something you do when you're installing a new hard drive into your computer and don't want to have to take forever restoring all your information."

"Well, we can load a Ghosting program into one of your computers, and copy everything on Cartman's existing hard drive to a new one, with the exception of anything relating to his little movie of you. As far as his computer is concerned, it'll be like it never existed. We then destroy his original hard drive, with that movie on it, give him his computer back and report him to the police. The store will have found out that hard drive 'didn't turn up' in the consignment, but the warehouse make mistakes, so they'll just dispute the delivery note with the warehouse. Once the police have Cartman's computer, he'll still have to spend a day or two in a cell at the police station while his computer has the forensic guys look over it for proof. That ought to give you guys some peace and quiet for a while" Kenny said

Kyle and Stan sate there, their faces slowly lighting up at the sheer brilliance of the plan. It was going to be a bit complicated, but it was going to work, or so they hoped at least.