A/N-Here we are again.As always,I love my only two reviewers coughGenius of MusicandAngelxInxHellcough.Oh I must apologizeahead of time for any inconsistencies you might see.I am not a very consistent person.Well actually I try to be,but I will bend the stoy a bit so that it can help me. I'm sorry if I offend anyone with the second skit. Yeah so enough with the drabble and on to the hilarity!

Disclaimer-Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh I don't own anything that has been seen on television or been performed on broadway.Kapeesh?
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After Christine and Raoul get married,Phillipe goes into beserker rage,and he constantly fights with Christine.Raoul can't take it and goes to Erik with his problem.

The agitated Viscount sighs and sits next to Erik. "I just cannot take it! They are constantly at each other's throats!"

"Did you ever think about telling them both to can it?" suggested the Phantom in a voice that sounded like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"No,I cannot do that." said Raoul sadly. "I just want for there to be peace in the house."

Erik rolls his eyes at him. "Don't tell me,dear Vicomte, that you want the greeting card family?"

Raoul throws him a confused look. "The what card family?"

Erik takes a deep breath and starts to explain. "You know.That family that is just ever so perfect...

We see a giant greeting card and inside are Christine,Raoul,and Phillipe seated on a couch.They are all joyful and smiling.Erik does the voices for all of them.

Christine's mouth opens and out comes a soft voice saying, "To my wonderful brother-in-law on this beautiful day.Your smiling face,your kind embrace,has made this home a happy place."

Phillipe's mouth opens and out comes a pompous voice saying, "And I am so delighted that it is you,to who my darling brother went to."

Than Raoul's mouth opens and a high pitched voice comes out saying, "And I am happy that you two are happy because otherwise my life would be crappy."

The card image disappears as we come back to the two men.

The Viscount stares at him for a while."My voice is not htat high!" squeals Raoul by accident.He ignores the laugh that Erik is trying to conceal. "Anyways,I don't desire that kind of lifestyle."

"Yes you do.I can see it in those hopeful,blue eyes of yours." said the Opera Ghost mockingly. "But the reality is this...

We see the giant greeting card reappear with the three still seated on the same couch.This time around,they are all frowning and seem cold.

Phillipe'smouth opens. "To my whore-in-law.You stole my kin."

Christine jerks her head in his direction. "We are married and that is fin!"

Phillipe turns to Raoul. "You took my mother."

Raoul gives Phillipe an icy stare. "Shut up ,brother."

Christine looks forward sadly. "I try my best."

Phillipe rolls his eyes. "That's a jest."

Raoul stands up. "I need to get out."

Phillipe glares at Christine. "Why don't you go and pout?"

Christine gives him a death glare. "NO NEED TO SHOUT!"

The giant card image disappears as well to show the two men once more.

Raoul hangs his head and places it in his hands. "How did you know? It is as if you go to my home and see everything that takes place!"

At the last statement Erik turns his head and starts to whistle innocently.
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It is Sunday and Meg and Madame Giry are at church.At the insistence of the Persian Erik went also.He and the Persian are all the way in the back sort of hidden in a corner.

The priest finished up the prayer he was saying. "All rise for a moment of silent meditation."

Everyone gets up and we go into their heads.

The Persian bows his head and starts to thank God. "Even though I sort of believe in a different deity I hope that you will not strike me down.Well thank you for helping me kick my opium habit.It was a disgusting, sordid, filthy habit that I needed to give up.Yet, it helped meget away at to think of it, it was pretty soothing and delicious...OH NO! I'm FINE!Ummmmm Amen."

We go all the way to Madame Giry. "Dear Lord,what are with all the bums that constantly roam about the streets! Couldn't you do something about that? Could you also try and make Erik a bit more cheery? Because he really depresses me with his depression ,and you are about the only person I know that can work miracles.Amen."

We switch to Meg,who is standing right next to her mother. "Dear God, I know it must be a pain for so many people to bother you on your day off,but I would really appreciate your help.You see, I still have these dirty thoughts about the Vicomte ,but that is a problem since he is very content with Christine.This obsession with him has also been keeping me from concentrating on my ballerina duties.So if you could either kill off Christine or burn down the opera house...again.Both would be nice also.It would help me out so much,sir.I mean God.Or is it Lord?Maybe it's Jesus.Whatever.Amen."

Than we finally go to Erik all the way in his shadowy corner."Dear Lord,I'm not sure why I am here.Maybe you know since you are supposedly omnipotent.But since you do everything for a purpose,would it kill you to throw me a bone once in a while? I mean sheesh! How much heartache must I endure! Even that Dantes fellow from that Count novel got to see the better side of things! Amen. Oh,watch over Christine and kill her husband.You know,the usual things I go on about.Blah blah blah.Amen for real."
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(A/N-The following is an Antoinette and co. I'm going to start putting in La Sorelli sometimes. She can be Jackie/Laurie.And in these quizzes the lowest is 100 while the highest is 2,000)

Firmin,Phillipe,and Sorelli are just sitting in the seats of the opera house when Erik comes rushing up to them.He seems very excited.

"Guess what." says the genius proudly.

The future prima ballerina rolls her eyes. "Nobody needs to guess.It's always about some dead thing or what you would like to do to someone." says the girl rather snootily.

Erik gives her an evil glare. "I said guess not give snooty remarks." threatened the boy. He than went back to his happy face. "Come on.Would you not like to know what I have to say?"

Firmin shakes his head. "Sometimes I'm afraid at what you have to say. You probably say things nicely in your head,but when it comes out all I see is blind rage."

"REALLY?" shouted the now enraged boy. "Well I guess those intelligence quizzes we were forced to take likes it when it isthreatened because I received 2,000 points!" yelled the still furious genius.He than calmed down at the thought of his other news. "I also beat up this stage hand who tried to take off my mask." stated Erik quite proudly.

At that moment Antoinette walks in and stands in the aisle next to Erik.

Phillipe turns to the future ballerina instructor. "Hold on.So those quiz results are in? What did you get,Antoinette?"

"Oh yes,I did.I got a 1230." said the girl rather carelessly.

The Viscount's eyes open in amazement. "A 1230! That is extraordinary! Why didn't you say anything?"

"Well I only got them this morning. I also did not wish to brag." said the girl humbly. "I mean,yes I did AWESOME!" her face glowed, "But no big deal."

Suddenly the doors burst open and Phillipe's mother comes rushing in. The Comtesse seems very happy. "Oh Phillipe darling, those quiz results came in! The envelope justhappened to be in my hand,than the letter justhappened to slide into my palm. I also just happened to have my reading glasses on,and I read your score." She beams at him proudly. "You got a 800!"

All the young people become silent and try to hold in their snickers.

Phillipe stares in horror. "An 800! That is all!"

His mother gives him a confused look. "What do you mean that's all? If you multiply 8 by 100 than you get 800! That is 8 perfect grades!"

Sorelli breaks the young people's silence. "Excuse me Comtesse de Chagny,but an 800 is not that good. The dumbest ballet rat can dance better than that."

"I know." said Erik. "My lasso has probably killed people smarter than that."

The Comtesse looks about. "Are you sure?"

"It's true Madam de Chagny." said Firmin. "Erik,though he may be a bit mad, did superbly well, Antoinette did better,heck I think even Sorelli here did better and she didn't even take it."

Phillipe's mother looks around. "Oh.Well than this very awkward.I guess I should be going home to tell the servants to stop making celebration food." She than walks slowly back outside.

Firmin looked at his embarrassed friend. "Don't worry,Vicomte.I'm sure things will shape up. I got a 950 ,and I wasn't even paying attention.Goodness I don't even remeber taking that quiz."

Antoinette looks at him in suprise. "You got a 950? Who would have thought it from a perverted,theory conspirarist."

He nods in agreement. "Who know what things could happen if I only apply myself? I guess we'll never know."

Phillipe looks down at the ground dejectedly. "I cannot believe that I have the lowest score here."

Erik walks over and pats his back. "There there Vicomte. Someone had to hold up the rest of us." said the boy in a meant to be soothing fashion. "There is nothing wrong with that.Well actually there is." He takes his hand off his back and starts to shake his finger at him. "Shame on you for not doing better."

Antoinette kicks Erik in the leg. "Don't rub it in!" hissed the girl to Erik. She than looks over at Phillipe. "Don't worry Phillipe.It is just a stupid quiz."

Phillipe raises his head at these encouraging words.He rises up and tries to put on a happy face. "You are right.I don't care!"

Suddenly the doors burst open again and Andre comes down the aisle with a giant grin across his face." I GOT A 1,030!" exclaimed the young man happily.

Phillipe stares in horror,slumps down in his seat,and begins to sob horribly.
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A/N-I just had to mention the Count of Monte Cristo since I am currently reading it and am lovin it.I am also going to be very preoccupied the next of couple of days so posting will be delayed a bit longer than usual.I'm sorry,but life is a cruel mistress.