Fan-Fiction Can Be Hazardous To Your Health
Sitting up late at my computer, basking in the glow of the screen at the wee hours of the night, pardon, morning, as I work on yet another installment of my out of control fanfic which has taken over my life, the computer freezes yet again. Goramm stinkin bucket of silicon chips. Goramm? Maybe I've been at this a mite too long tonight. I press control, alt, delete, my master stroke for any computer ailment. No luck. Again. Again. Nothing. Press the on-off button, nothing. Unplug it from the wall, nothing still. C'mon, you possessed or something? Just when I had the juices flowing and my fingers flying with minimal typos this goes and happens every ruttin' time.
Muttering some catchy catch phrases under my breath I go for the Hail Mary of my do-it-youself tech support. Ok, control, alt, delete, while popping out the battery and pressing the on-off switch…Hey where did these extra hands come from that allows me to be doin' all this at the same time? No time for an answer as a flash of light and commotion of noise and the next thing I know I'm flat on my back on the floor. What the guay? I pull myself uprightish and squinting at the weird light shining from odd angles I wonder just what the heck is wrong with the computer. That sure as hell ain't my screensaver.
As I rub my sore backside I am confused by the redecoration that has taken place in my dorm some how without my noticing. Hmm… the exciting brown circa 1970-something tiles are now cold metal grating, well least the room's dry instead of the normal steaming atmosphere from my amphibious roommates who practically live in the shower. Bed? Nope. Desk and Chair? Nope. The Tower of Terrifying Textbooks? Nope. Hell yeah! Wait no, I have to sell those back and get some cash come end of the semester, crap. Work-out bench and weights? Giant crates with elaborate Chinese characters inscribed on the sides? Check and Double Check. Wait... Toto, I don't think I'm in Kansas anymore, or my dorm either for that matter.
I try to finish sitting up only to decide laying down works just as well, if not better right at the moment. Next I open my eyes to find a faceful of hair and a familiar looking person, body bent double over, staring at me intently. Dude, I've got to get more sleep, those 7:00 classes are killing me. I blink, nope, still there and it isn't my roomie either. River?
"I heard you coming, next time just knock." She whispers before twirling off. Gotta be dreaming, definitely that's it. !PINCH! Eowch! So much for that idea, never works in the movies anyways.
"What's your sister going on about 'She's finally here' all about? Don't tell me she's off her meds again, I don't think Jayne'd be too taken with that notion of reacquainting his chest with a knife wielding River any time soon Doc so…"
Two men descended the stairs just as my mind went all bibbidy-boo over the edge. Well least maybe I'll get some autographs. And then it all went black.
