A/N: Credit to WH Rutledge for his opinions on a large part of this chapter. Unfortunately, he has also deleted everything on his account in the time between now and that when he helped me out with this chapter, which was a little less than 2 weeks ago. There's more I wish I could say, but... frankly, it would probably be a breach of trust.
To Rutledge himself, if you do ever happen to see this, thank you for all the wonderful feedback you always gave on Discord for my writing. And I sincerely hope the best for you from here on out. Take care.
Anyway, let's start the show again, shall we?
Chapter 6
The temptations from Hermione's heart were in full force this morning.
When Harry walked into the living room and sat down in the armchair, it took all of her willpower not to either get up from the sofa and snuggle up with him, or go pull him over from the armchair to sit next to her. There was no way that her parents wouldn't have had many questions, or maybe would start teasing them a little, about her behavior if she did so. She wanted to wait until Harry was ready for certain to reveal the new step in their relationship. Plus, on a lighter note, the cat would no doubt get angry since he was lying in her lap at that moment.
Once her mum and dad had left for the kitchen, however, Harry got up on his own and sat down on her left side, leaving no space between them. Crookshanks looked up at the disturbance and, seeing Harry on the sofa, stood up and shifted his position so that he could lie down and stretch out in both of their laps.
Hermione shook her head with mirth, then let out a quick laugh when Crookshanks began to purr after Harry started scratching him. "I see he's trained you well."
Harry smirked at her, while not stopping the attention he was giving the orange cat, and said, "At least he likes me enough to want to train me. He apparently stayed with me the whole night, since he was still lying on the bed when I woke up. And I guess he came down here while I was in the shower."
She just happily nodded at Harry's words. Then, knowing that they would have at least fifteen minutes before breakfast would be ready, she snuggled as close as she could into Harry's side before laying her head on his right shoulder. Harry leaned his head against hers a few seconds later.
She heard him say, "You sure you want to sit like this? Your parents could always come back into the living room at any moment."
Without lifting her head, she answered, "We'll hear their footsteps in the hall, and I have no intentions of falling asleep this time. Besides, we could always blame Crookshanks for not letting us separate."
Harry laughed at her reply, causing the cat to look up in annoyance from having his attentions be interrupted. Then, Harry jokingly whispered, "Seems I might be a bad influence on you, Miss Granger, if you're willing to stoop so low as to blame your cat."
Without missing a beat, Hermione fired back in the same tone. "You only just now figured that out? I did break us into the third-floor corridor in first year, when Malfoy tried to set you up with that fake duel. Not to mention stealing ingredients for the Polyjuice Potion from Snape in second year, and illegally using a Time-Turner to save your fugitive godfather in third year. One could say that I was just a meek little bookworm before meeting you."
She grew concerned when, after a few seconds of silence, she felt his head pull away and then heard him sigh. Lifting her own head to look at him, she found him staring down at the floor. She had to ask, "Harry, what's wrong? Did I say something bad?"
This caused him to turn to her and shake his head. "No, Hermione, it's not you. Just… hearing you lay things out in a row like that really does put into perspective how much you've done for me, and all the risks you've taken for me." When he finished, his gaze shifted back to the floor.
She stared at him for a couple of seconds before putting her left hand on his shoulder. When he faced her again, she placed her right hand on his cheek in a loving caress.
As his eyes softened a bit, she whispered, "And if I had to do it all over again for us to be here right now, I would do so without hesitation. You don't ever have to feel guilty that I care for you, Harry."
He gave her a sad smile and said, "It's hard not to with everything that's happened in our lives, but I'll try."
Her instant, affectionate reply was, "That's all I ask. And if you slip up, I'll be right there for you."
He gave the tiniest of nods. Hermione gave his shoulder a squeeze before pulling her hands back.
Then, a sudden idea popped into her head. It would give her a chance to not only finally give him that long-overdue apology for sixth year but also to see if he would talk about something related to his words from that night in the common room. Plus, the idea would allow them to be away from the house in case he wouldn't want to talk too deeply about things around her parents. He must have seen the light bulb turn on above her head, because he asked, "What are you thinking about?"
She quietly answered, "How would you feel about going for a walk, since the snow stopped at some point after we went to bed? There's a church about twenty minutes away from here at a walking pace. It has some outside benches by the main entrance underneath a big awning so that they don't get wet. There… there are some things that I need to say, and going there would let us more easily be alone. And before you start getting crazy ideas in that easily-guilt-tripped mind of yours: no, it won't be any kind of breakup speech on my part."
Harry had been looking quite pensively at her, but her last statement caused him to snort in amusement. "Yep, you definitely know me better than anyone."
He then turned completely serious as he replied, "Yeah, we can do that. You listened to me yesterday, so I'll listen to you for as long as you want me to. Now, I was hoping that we could go ahead and tell your parents about us after we all finish eating. What do you say we head out after taking care of that?"
Hermione nodded. "Yes, that sounds good."
They both leaned back against the sofa at that point, and Harry resumed his scratching of Crookshanks, who immediately started purring again now that he was the center of attention. Hermione was content to just sit there and enjoy the moment. And a few minutes later, her father appeared at the living room entrance and told them that the food was ready.
Breakfast was a mostly quiet affair. Miranda did ask if the two had anything planned for the afternoon, to which Hermione responded that she and Harry were going for a walk through the neighborhood sometime after breakfast, staying close to the church once they arrived there. Miranda nodded at the plan but said to make sure to watch out for any patches of ice along the way. Hermione snorted in her mind at her mum's worry but, after the words from last night and Harry's reaction to how her parents saw him as important enough to worry over, she would never say a bad thing about it.
Once everyone had finished their meal, however, things took a sharp turn for the unexpected.
As Miranda took all the plates, Jack suddenly said, "If you two wouldn't mind, could you stay in here for a bit? There's something we would like to discuss."
Harry and Hermione both turned to each other for a second in pure confusion. Once Miranda made her way back to her seat at the table, she looked at the children and added, in a suspiciously innocent tone, "So, everything went well yesterday, correct?"
Hermione didn't understand what was going on. As soon as she and Harry came home, he told them that his talk with her about his nightmare went great. Why would her mum suddenly ask about that again? And what was it that her dad meant when he said there was something to discuss?
Unless…
Every one of Hermione's fears flared up at her next thought. Could her parents already know about her and Harry? And… were they actually about to tell the two of them off about it, even after everything they had said to her about being happy with her progress with him?
Meanwhile, Harry said with great hesitance, "Well, it did, but there is still something that Hermione and I wanted to talk about with the two of you today."
Miranda immediately interjected, smirking all the while. "And would this something be related to the kiss that you two shared in the hall last night?"
They did know, Hermione thought. She looked at Harry to gauge his reaction and found him appearing more frightened than even when he'd seen her parents at King's Cross. All of her protective instincts for him ignited at once. And if this ended up being the last time she was ever on good terms with her parents, then so be it.
Hermione turned back to her parents with the harshest expression she'd ever given them, actually making them blink in surprise at the extreme change. Then, she scooted her chair as close to Harry as possible and took hold of his right hand. Though she didn't look at him, she did give his hand a quick squeeze, trying to signal to him that she would be with him through whatever her parents may say.
She spoke with more vitriol than ever before, "Yes, Harry and I are now together. No, I will not now, nor will I ever, give him up no matter what objections you are about to give. I would have thought you would both be happy about this after the talk we had in the car two days ago." She then locked her eyes directly onto her mother. "Especially you, Mum, given what your own family put you through for wanting to be with Dad."
Harry tried to speak, in a soft voice. "Hermione – "
She immediately turned to him and interrupted, "No, Harry! I know what you're going to say. That I shouldn't ruin my relationship with my parents for you." Her voice then began to tremble after she reached over with her remaining free hand to grab and hold his other one. "No words can ever truly express just how happy I am that you are willing to be with me and see how far our relationship can go. And if we somehow don't work out in the future, as slim as a possibility I think that even is, then we'll figure that out. But we'll do it ourselves, not by anyone else forcing us. I gave up my family once for you already when I hadn't even realized my actual feelings for you. And I absolutely would do it again if I needed to."
Harry was looking at her in total astonishment, like he couldn't believe that she would say all of that right in front of her parents so soon. They were so engrossed with one another, and Hermione too wrapped up in her speech to Harry, that they completely missed the knowing smirks that had reached the faces of the room's other two occupants.
They didn't, however, miss the resounding chuckle from Jack and his statement afterwards, causing them to turn their heads. "Like mother like daughter, indeed. Didn't I tell you last night to expect this, Miranda? Though I must admit, the sheer intensity still took me by surprise."
Miranda replied, somewhat sheepishly, "Yes, I suppose that's what I get for wanting to tease a little first, rather than just coming right out with everything."
She then gave Hermione a heartfelt smile and said, "Hermione… yes, we were certain that you and Harry had finally made things official. Your talk last night wasn't as silent as you may have thought it was, and I got curious. I watched the two of you kiss, and I assumed the reason why before immediately telling your father. But it's like what you even brought up. How could you ever think that we are anything except completely happy for the two of you?"
Jack immediately added, "Your mother was so ecstatic that she had to muffle herself to keep from squealing. I saw her clap a hand over her mouth, and she also told me that she had to bite down on both sides of the inside of her mouth."
Hermione was utterly baffled at the change of events, and embarrassed that she had read things so incorrectly. In her silence, Harry was actually the first to respond, in a fearful tone. "So, you're not angry about what happened in the hall last night? Or that I'm with Hermione now?"
Jack looked over to him and spoke as seriously as he could, "Well, we already know Hermione's feelings in this matter. So, I'll ask you one question, Harry… are you happy?"
Harry's instant reply was somehow soft yet also resolute. "Hermione wanting to go out with me made me feel more joy than I ever have before in my life."
Hermione couldn't help giving his hands a squeeze at his declaration, causing him to face her again and then give her a smile.
Jack and Miranda glanced at each other for a second before standing from their seats and moving to the other side of the table. Once they were there, she quietly asked, "Would you both stand up, please?"
Letting go of each other's hands as they did what she asked, Harry and Hermione were surprised when Miranda quickly wrapped them both up in a hug. Then, she said, "Then we wish you both all the happiness in the world."
She held the two tightly for a few more seconds before letting them go. Jack stepped up to Hermione and gave her a big hug for a few seconds. When he looked to Harry afterwards, he held out his right hand, to which Harry hesitantly reached out but then firmly took. At that point, Jack got a thoughtful look on his face for an instant before shocking Harry by pulling him in and wrapping the other arm around his shoulders for a hug.
Then, Jack whispered for only the two of them to hear, "Don't ever let go of that happiness. You deserve it for all that you've had to suffer."
Harry was at such a loss for words, he could only meekly reply, "Th-thank you."
The older man patted his back a couple of times before finally stepping away.
Hermione wasn't sure what her father may have said, but when Harry looked to her with eyes shining from tears and a genuine smile, it made her more jubilant than ever that she'd convinced him to stay with her for the holidays. She couldn't help flashing him a beaming smile of her own in response.
But then, remembering how this entire moment started, she turned back to her parents and asked, "So, if it wasn't actually the fact that Harry and I are now a couple, then what did you mean when you said there was something to discuss?"
Jack and Miranda looked at one another before he said, "I'll take it from here, and you'll jump in if you have anything to add?"
She nodded without a word, and they both turned back to the children.
"So," Jack continued, "there are two main points to hit," and he held up two fingers for an instant. "First off, any excessive displays of affection should be done in the privacy of your rooms. Basically, if it's something you wouldn't want to catch the two of us doing," as he gestured between himself and Miranda, "then it's probably a good idea to not do it in one of the public rooms."
Harry and Hermione both blushed, but then Hermione realized at least one thing she could do. She circled her left arm around Harry's waist and snuggled into his side as much as possible before then laying her head on his shoulder. She couldn't see his blush deepen and an embarrassed smile grow on his face.
She then asked, "So, something like this is alright?"
With zero hesitation, Miranda did the same actions with Jack before cheekily responding, "I don't know, sweetheart. Is it?"
Hermione and her father both snorted at the same time at her mother's teasing, but she nodded and said, "Yes. It is."
As Miranda stopped her own cuddling but remained standing at Jack's side, Hermione then continued. "Alright, that's point one. Then what is point number two?"
Jack's expression became a bit sterner as he replied, "Point number two… once things between you two go far enough, and we're both certain they will," to which the teenagers turned as red in the face as a tomato, "you better be using protection for at least as long as you two are still in school. While you may be nineteen, and we know that Harry is eighteen, you've both still got enough time that you don't need to be worrying about an unplanned pregnancy while still finishing your academics. Now, am I correct in assuming that there are magical means of contraception?"
Hermione just silently nodded.
"Good," he continued, "then make sure you two can use those without a hitch. Of course, if you would rather have regular means of protection, or just want them in addition, Miranda and I won't mind getting those if you tell us. And once you two have graduated from Hogwarts, all I'll say is that whatever you do then is your choice."
Even though this was nothing like what he would expect from the father of someone he would be dating, Harry still couldn't help feeling fearful about what would happen if Hermione's parents ever caught them in such a position.
Jack saw the obvious look of terror in Harry's expression and said, "Harry, I'm pretty sure I know what you're thinking if the fear in your eyes says anything. And I can assure you, you have nothing to worry about from Miranda or myself if you two progress to that level of a relationship. If anything, while she'll try to keep things to a level that you are more comfortable with, we're quite certain that our daughter is more likely to be the initiator of any steps like that. I wouldn't doubt that, if it were all up to her, you would probably be moving into her room this very night."
Hermione pulled her head off of Harry's shoulder and pouted at her father's initial implication, and then deepened her pout when Harry began laughing after the last remark. But his laugh was so infectious and endearing that she couldn't help smiling at the sight.
After about thirty seconds, he got his giggles under control. Looking to his right to see Hermione happily staring up at him, he gave another embarrassed grin before shrugging his left shoulder.
They turned back to her parents when Miranda spoke up. "Other than those points, what the two of you do is all up to you. Is that fair?"
Harry timidly said, "It almost seems unfair to you. I wouldn't think…"
He paused, being a bit afraid to continue his previous thought, but then Miranda spoke up with exactly what was on his mind. "You wouldn't think the parents of your girlfriend would ever allow you to snog or even touch her anywhere in their house?"
His face turned red once again as he uncomfortably nodded.
"Well first," she continued, "I refer you to my husband's earlier words about our daughter."
Hermione interjected, "Did I miss a memo that said today was 'Pick on Your Daughter Day' somehow?"
Miranda smirked but ignored the interruption. "And second," smirk then changing into a warm smile, "you're both adults. Adults that have faced more trials than any person ever should. And like we said earlier, we want the two of you to be happy. That really is the long and short of it."
Harry once again seemed overwhelmed at the consideration that Miranda and Jack were willing to give him, even though they had only known him in person for a few days.
After a few seconds of silence, with his eyes glancing between the two teenagers, Jack spoke again. "So, beyond that, do you two have any questions?"
Hermione looked to Harry with the question in her eyes. His eyes glanced away for a second before he then barely shook his head. She turned back to her parents and quietly said, "No, no questions."
Miranda responded, "Then be safe and have fun on your walk today. And remember what I said about icy spots."
Feeling the conversation had reached its end, Hermione looked at Harry and nudged her head towards the kitchen entrance. He nodded, and they made their way to their rooms. They both put on their shoes, jackets, and gloves, while Hermione also grabbed her knit hat. And a minute later, after saying goodbye to her parents in the living room, they were outside and standing on the sidewalk in front of her house.
Staring at each other, Hermione was the first to speak. "Well. That was certainly something."
Harry shook his head a bit and replied, "No kidding. My luck is never supposed to be this good. It's why I was expecting your parents to kick me out of the house after your mum implied that they already knew about us."
She firmly said, "They wouldn't have, and I badly missed the mark when my first thought was that they were going to object to us as a couple. But even if they somehow did want you to leave, then I would have just left with you."
He simply gave her a sad smile. She knew he was probably thinking about not deserving such kindness from her, but she kept quiet since he was at least trying not to say anything outright about it.
Deciding to get a move on, since she already had enough serious things to talk about, she moved to his right side and linked her arm into his. Then, she asked, "Well, shall we get going? I'll try to keep us on the sidewalk as much as possible."
He just nodded, and with that, she began leading them on their way.
For most of the time, they simply basked in the tranquil silence, only ever seeing a couple of cars driving down the road while the two of them made their journey. At one point, Harry brought up how peaceful the whole area seemed, with the snow-covered houses and lawns, and no other people around. He mentioned that it was as though the entire world decided to stop and just enjoy being with family for a day. She agreed and said that she always got that feeling of serenity when snow arrived during the Christmas holidays. That feeling was amplified this year, after so much time of darkness and uncertainty.
Soon enough, they arrived at the church. As the parking lot was completely empty, Hermione figured they should be safe from prying eyes and ears. She walked them over to one of the benches that she had talked about, sitting close to the entrance. After making sure that the bench was completely dry and then casting a warming charm so that they wouldn't be too cold, they took a seat. Facing forward and looking out towards the road, Hermione couldn't help closing her eyes and taking a deep and slightly shaky breath. She was a bit startled when she felt Harry place his right hand on top of her left, and she turned to look at him.
His expression betrayed his concern before he even spoke. "Hermione, I know you said you wanted to talk, but what's wrong? What's got you worried?"
After about five seconds of silence, she spoke with dread in her voice. "There are a couple of things, Harry. One is about something that hit me while sleeping last night and won't go away, and the other is something I owe to you. The first part is also a question I want to ask you, so it's completely up to you if you would rather not give an answer."
While he was confused at what she might be referring to, he immediately replied, "Hermione, if anyone on the planet has earned the right to ask me anything, it's you. And as far as you owing me anything, I can't think of what that could possibly be, but I'll listen to whatever you have to say."
She nodded and then looked around. Seeing no one in the area, she quickly pulled out her wand and muttered, "Muffliato." It wouldn't do for a random passerby to hear about anything related to the magical world.
Stowing her wand back in her jacket, Hermione steeled herself and then came out with it. "Well, last week in the common room, the thing that you said hurt the most about the holiday break was not having anyone to spend it with. But… what about Teddy? He's still your godson. Couldn't you have gone to see him?"
Her anxiety intensified when his face fell, eyes glancing away, and he pulled his hand off of hers. Something had happened between the end of the war and now. All she could say, however, was a slightly quivering, "Harry?"
He closed his eyes and murmured, "I knew I should never have kept this hidden from you all this time."
At that point, his gaze locked back onto her as he said, with nothing but sadness in his tone, "Teddy and his grandmother Andromeda are dead."
She put her hands over her mouth in shock. After a couple of seconds, she lowered her arms and could only say, "What?! When? How?"
He sighed and began the story. "I found out while we were planning the trip to Australia. I had sent a letter to Andromeda talking about Remus and Tonks, trying to give whatever condolences I could, and then asking if she would be OK with me visiting sometime to see Teddy. But the only response letter I eventually got was from Kingsley, who must have been receiving anything mailed to Tonks or her family at that point. In it, after offering his apologies, he said that they learned what happened to Teddy and Andromeda from Rodolphus Lestrange, Bellatrix's husband, when Kingsley and the remaining Aurors were interrogating all the Death Eaters to learn their exact crimes."
Harry's voice began to shake at this point. "Tonks was killed by Bellatrix, her aunt, in the battle. But before being killed, she was first tortured with the Cruciatus Curse. Bellatrix, deciding that the whole family needed to die at this point, then used a Legilimency probe while Tonks was too incapacitated to defend. Bellatrix found out not only where her sister was staying but also that Tonks had a child there. Only then did the bitch kill Tonks.
"Apparently, Bellatrix found Rodolphus after that and had him use Legilimency to watch the memories of what she had learned. Then, they rushed as quickly as they could to the first area where they could Apparate off the grounds and arrive at the house. They overpowered Andromeda, found Teddy, and killed them before coming back to Hogwarts. At least I know that you were able to kill Bellatrix when, while she was battling you, Luna, and Ginny in the Great Hall, you caught her unawares with a Banishing Charm and blasted her headfirst into the wall after she took a moment to taunt you three. And Rodolphus got his when all the remaining Death Eaters were executed as punishment for all of their crimes from both wars. Not that it really means much, though. The only solace is that Teddy should be with his parents now. And even then, it's hardly a solace at all because it means they're all still dead…"
As Harry went silent and turned his head away, Hermione's vision was being blurred by the tears in her eyes. How could this have been allowed to happen to such innocent people? And then, she gasped at a sudden thought, causing Harry to turn back to her with a mixture of grief and puzzlement. Suddenly, so many things made so much more sense.
She barely managed to choke out, "That's why you said you had no family to spend time with. And why you felt you had no purpose. You thought that you would still have your godson to visit and possibly help take care of, but even that was torn away from you. And it's why your thoughts about having no purpose hit you when you left Australia, didn't they? Because you had something to focus on while we were preparing to find my parents."
He scooted closer to her and pulled her into a hug. It was amazing to her that he was the one having to relive painful memories but was also trying to comfort her.
He responded with only a single, grief-stricken word in her ear. "Yeah."
Her tears began streaming like a river at his response. But she wasn't finished, either. "And, and that's why you've been so afraid that I will leave you, isn't it? Because you think that you would fall right back into your misery again."
His voice trembled even more as he answered, "Yes."
She immediately wrapped her arms as tightly as she could around him and sputtered, "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, Harry. I wish I could just take all your pain away. You don't deserve to have so many losses in your life."
His wordless reply was to simply tighten his hold around her. She buried her head into his shoulder and silently cried for him and all the family that he lost so quickly.
Eventually, she felt him pull his head back, so she lifted hers off of his shoulder. As she looked up at him with sad eyes, though his own expression was still full of sorrow, a flash of resolution passed for an instant. Then, he wiped the tears off of her cheeks before lowering his forehead down to hers and holding it there.
"Hermione, you've already helped so much," he said, his voice becoming steadier. "You've never given up on trying to get me to talk, and last Friday night, you finally broke the barrier I'd put around myself. You've proven so many times over the last week that you will always be here for me, even at times when I would tell you that I don't deserve such consideration. And I meant every word when I said that yesterday was the happiest day of my life. So, although I've experienced so much pain in my life, and I still don't know what to really do with my future, I know that I'll eventually make it through with you."
Not knowing what to say, Hermione reached up with her left hand and put it on his cheek. The small smile he gave at her action got her mind working again, and she said, "Thank you. Still, I'm sorry you won't get the chance to know your godson."
His face showed a mixture of pain and acceptance. He replied, "Like I said, at least the family are all together again, in what I like to think is a better place."
She whispered in response, "You're right, they'll be together. And I'm sure they'll have your parents and Sirius with them as much as possible, too."
He didn't say anything, simply closing his eyes and imagining such a picture with a tiny smile on his face. She gave him a minute of silence, letting him take comfort in the image she painted for him.
His eyes snapped open once she did continue speaking. "And also, I'm sorry that you had to console me when you were the one having to relive your terrible memories."
The statement caused him to let out a soft chuckle before he replied. "I'm pretty sure I still owe you when it comes to being supportive, considering how many times you've already comforted me since that night in the common room."
What they owed one another… that caused Hermione to remember the other main reason for wanting to talk to Harry. And her expression must have reflected that thought, as he said with concern, "Something I said just gave you some kind of reminder, didn't it? Like when I got all pensive after you listed out some of the things you've done for me in our years of friendship?"
Then, his brow furrowed a bit as he continued, "Wait, you said something earlier about owing me somehow. That's what you were thinking about, isn't it?"
She looked at him with a melancholy half-smile and said, "You're getting good at reading me." She dropped her hand from his cheek and loosened her other arm, and Harry let her go as she pulled back from their hug.
Before she could start, he jumped in again. "Hermione, I'll say it again. I don't think there's a single thing that you owe me."
Looking at him dejectedly, she replied, "Yes, Harry. I do."
Taking a deep breath, she let the cat out of the bag. "I need to apologize for my actions in the summer after fourth year as well as sixth year. I may have brought those up on the train ride, with a bit of focus on that summer, but I didn't really give you an actual apology, which you deserve."
She wanted to look away out of shame, but she willed herself to keep her gaze locked onto his eyes. It wouldn't be a real apology to her otherwise.
"There's no excuse that could be good enough for what I did to you. When adding how I've come to the conclusion that the kiss I gave you on the cheek at the end of fourth year was a way of trying to get you to notice me, it also feels unforgivable. I should never have let you, my best friend, wallow in sadness and have to deal with the aftermath of witnessing both Cedric Diggory's death and Tom Riddle's resurrection alone that summer. And my next statement, while I said it on the train, it bears repeating. I should have spat on Dumbledore and spent that entire summer with you, if I truly cared about you.
"And then, in sixth year, I treated you so harshly when I was pursuing Ron, thinking he was a guaranteed choice for a boyfriend. I should have been helping you prepare for the war, but instead, I wasted the year on petty school drama and being mad at you over a simple book, of all things. And the only reason I can think of for my actions was that, after everything in fifth year, I was subconsciously trying to get rid of my feelings for you and ended up going much too far. Again, for someone that has always been my best friend, my treatment of you was absolutely wretched. And I didn't want too much time to pass with this new step in our relationship without directly telling you that."
Hermione timidly ended with, "I'm so sorry for how I treated you, Harry. And that's all I wanted to say." She finally lost the fight with her overflowing shame, turning her gaze to look at the ground. Now, it was up to him as to how he wanted to proceed.
The silence was heavy, and she shut her eyes in fear of what may happen. They popped open, however, when she felt his hand under her chin. He slowly tilted her head up until they were once again staring into each other's eyes. His expression was completely serious, but she was unable, for once, to tell if this meant good or ill tidings. Thus, she merely remained silent, not wanting to distract him from whatever was on his mind.
Then, after dropping his hand, he finally spoke in a hushed tone. "That summer, you trusted that Dumbledore would know what is right. We all did so many times, even when he essentially never trusted people with information that was relevant to the war. So, let me ask you this. Knowing what you do now about what was planned for me in regards to Riddle, would you have still trusted him?"
With a hardened expression, her fiery reply was, "Trust a man whose only plan for the war was putting the entire hunt to destroy the Horcruxes on your shoulders, while simultaneously wanting you to just give up and die like a martyr to Riddle when no one could be certain that only the soul piece in your scar would be destroyed? No, I wouldn't. Frankly, I hope he and Snape are enjoying the fruits of their plan together in hell right now. And I'm kind of insulted that you even asked me that question."
To her utter confusion, Harry chuckled before he said, "And thus, you prove my exact point. With more knowledge about what was really going on, you would have told Dumbledore to bugger off in a heartbeat. Which is why I'm not going to hold that summer against you, and I'll say that you never owed me anything for it. Especially not when you were hardly the only one to leave me in the dark but were by far the most apologetic as soon as I arrived at Grimmauld Place. Don't think that I've forgotten how you immediately launched yourself at me and went into how sorry you were before I could walk into the room, even if I was hardly appreciative of it at the time."
Her eyes widened at how easily he was accepting this. Was it really going to be that simple?
As her mind was reeling, he continued speaking. "And as far as sixth year is concerned…"
He paused, making a pit start to grow in her stomach at what he could have been thinking. But his following question made her emotions flip right back to being totally puzzled. "What would you say if I told you that I had my own hypothesis about what happened between us that year?"
She was so dumbfounded that her first response was merely, "…Huh?"
After he repeated the question, the cogs in her mind finally got to working. She asked, "How could you have a hypothesis? Are you saying that something insidious happened?"
"I'm saying that there's a few dots I've connected that paint a very grim picture about why we were terrible to one another and didn't seem to trust each other. Of course, I do need to note that it's also all circumstantial, but those circumstances line up too well to not be suspicious about them. So, would you be willing to hear me out?"
Whatever this was, it had to be terrible for Harry to be this serious about it. She answered, "Of course, Harry. It must be important if you're so worried."
He nervously laughed and replied, "Alright, then that leads me to one more question before I go into it, if you'll indulge me." She just silently nodded, so he continued. "The perfume you received from Ron for Christmas in 1995, did you ever use it?"
Boy, this day was certainly bringing out all kinds of confusion in her. "Well, yes. I…"
She paused and lightly blushed in embarrassment from what she was about to say. "At the Burrow, in the summer after that Christmas, I pulled the perfume out of my bag when I was unpacking things, not knowing that I'd apparently left it in there sometime after receiving it. Ron was in the room, and when I pulled it out, he asked if I'd used it and what I thought of it. I felt bad when I told him I'd forgotten about it with everything that was happening in fifth year. So, I started using it so that I wouldn't seem ungrateful, even though I never believed it was a very thoughtful gift."
So many alarms in her head started blaring when Harry closed his eyes in a grimace and then sadly muttered, "I was afraid of that."
Hermione instantly said, with a sternness that left no wiggle room, "Alright, Harry. Whatever this hypothesis is that you have, start talking and spare no details. I want to know everything."
"And I'll tell you all that I have," he responded. "Just please, unless I specifically ask you a question in the middle of this, let me finish everything I need to say before you interrupt or ask any questions you may have. Is that alright?"
When she nodded her assent, he took a long, deep breath to steel himself and then began. "Alright, so the first point. We know you got that perfume in Christmas of our fifth year. Now, do you remember what you said at that time to Ron about his gift?"
She just shook her head.
"Well, I do. And you specifically told Ron that the perfume was 'really unusual.' Doesn't mean much by itself, but does mean so much more when combined with my later points."
Hermione was legitimately frightened by Harry's foreboding words. What was going on, what had he figured out? But she remained silent, keeping her torment to herself so that Harry could run through all of his information.
He continued, "Point number two. The Weasley twins, as new as their joke shop was, already had a line of love potions up and ready for sale. Love potions which they specifically said would have lasted up to twenty-four hours, when Ginny asked whether the potions worked. Love potions that I believe they would have needed to be working on and testing in earlier years in order for the products to have been ready to sell so quickly."
She could physically feel her blood beginning to run cold as the dots were starting to be connected. No, it couldn't be…
"Point number three, and the one that will make everything clear for you with how smart you are, assuming you haven't already figured out what track I'm going down." He had to take another long breath, as though even he knew this reveal was going to blow her away.
"At one point after the Quidditch match with Slytherin but before the Christmas holidays in sixth year, you yourself told me that Fred and George had an owl order service which could help with smuggling their love potions to people in Hogwarts. And you explicitly said that the potions were being disguised as cough potions or perfumes. Well… what if the ones disguised as perfumes could have been made to actually be used as perfumes, rather than being drunk like a potion normally would? And it goes into effect by seeping into your skin after putting the perfume on, or perhaps even the scent alone is enough to get you to start pining after the person to which the potion is keyed?"
Hermione put her hands over her mouth and slowly shook her head in despair. No, no…
Harry sadly looked at her and said, "Looks like you're realizing exactly what I did… but there's still one more point, at least that relates specifically to you."
She was sure that the look of baffled astonishment on her face when she dropped her hands would have been hilarious at another time, but his expression remained downcast with what he was going to reveal.
He said, "Point number four. After Ron ate all those chocolates spiked with love potion and I took him to Slughorn for an antidote, Slughorn explicitly told me that potions will strengthen the longer they're kept. Now, if I may ask, did you use the perfume every single day?"
Hermione slowly shook her head and answered, almost in a stupor, "No. I only used it maybe every few days, and it lasted almost until the end of the school year."
He just gave a gloomy hum in response. Then, he said, "Well, for reference, when Ron ate those chocolates, while the reaction would definitely have been stronger from the potions having been three months old, he also ate the entire batch at once. Thus, it was clear that he was under a potion's influence because he immediately fell head over heels for Romilda Vane.
"Now, one that sits for over six months should theoretically be even stronger. The question, however, is this… what if a much smaller amount, perhaps such as that one would get from a perfume, wasn't so plainly obvious? What if a lower dose at any one time meant that the feelings driven by the potion appear to simply be a natural development of feelings, not only to the one under the potion's influence but also to all those around them? But when combined with the higher strength from being kept for so long, the victim still sees the person that the potion is keyed to as the most likely choice, or even the only choice, to try and get as a significant other?"
And at that point, Harry finally spoke the words she had been dreading to hear from him. "So, I'll just say it outright… it's possible that, on Christmas in 1995, you were given a love potion perfume that was keyed to Ron."
A/N: Relieved to have finally gotten a new chapter posted for this. Hopefully, I can get the next one posted by next week, as well. What originally started as a single chapter ended up having to get split into two, so I've already got most of what will take up Chapter 7 written (though the key word there is "most," unfortunately). That's also why this chapter doesn't finish at the end of the day in the story like all the others have lol. And now, a few developer commentary bits.
First, regarding the situation with Teddy and Andromeda, I realized I was going to have to do something with them to be consistent with the fact that, before Harry left Australia, he told Hermione that he had no more family. I also didn't want to do anything like Andromeda straight up leaving the country without telling anyone, or just having her forbid Harry to ever come to her house to see her grandson, because that felt like it might be more cruel to Harry to be coldly rejected in a manner like one of those two, rather than having Andromeda simply going out while trying to protect her grandson. I at least like to think my method of how they died is sensible enough that it could have taken place. Or maybe it just is to me (*shrugs*).
Second, on the potions theory: Hermione telling Ron that the perfume she received is 'really unusual' comes from Chapter 23 of Order of the Phoenix. The first appearance of Fred and George's love potions, along with Ginny asking if they work and the twins saying that the potions will work up to 24 hours, comes from Chapter 6 of Half-Blood Prince. Hermione telling Harry about the owl order service along with potions being disguised as perfumes comes from Chapter 15 of HBP. Finally, Slughorn saying that potions will strengthen when kept for longer comes from Chapter 18 of HBP. Now, the additional extrapolations are all my own, but I didn't just pull them out of the blue. There is legitimate circumstantial evidence from the books themselves that can point to an explanation of potions.
Third, assuming it hasn't already turned you away, I can assure you that potions are not going to become the main plot of the remainder of the story. Obviously, there will be some discussion during the next chapter given where I ended this one, but the focus of this story is still on Harry and Hermione's deepened relationship and them being there for each other in any way they can.
Fourth, you may have noticed that slid-in sentence where Bellatrix's death differs from the actual seventh book. That's because in my mind, considering that Neville got to kill Nagini along with telling Riddle to screw off, and Harry was always going to get the credit for killing Riddle, Hermione deserved to be the one to get the kill on Bellatrix and get vengeance for her torture at Malfoy Manor. Especially when canon already had Hermione, Luna, and Ginny fighting Bellatrix together anyway.
And for everyone that made it this far, thank you for reading, and I hope you stay tuned for more!
