DISCLAIMER – I do not own Stargate: Atlantis. It belongs to MGM/UA. This story is for enjoyment, not profit.
SPOILERS – None in this chapter that I'm aware of
RATING – See the note at the beginning of Chapter One
A/N – Any large blocks of narration that are in present tense and italicized are flashback scenes (in case it isn't immediately obvious. lol)
I speak a couple of languages fluently (and a couple of dead ones semi-fluently) but Czech is not among them. There's a tiny snippet of Czech in this chapter. Please forgive any mistakes
Still no beta. All mistakes are all mine.
The Song Of Silent Rivers
4. The River Spirit
"Come on, Radek! Jump in! I dare you!"
Eight-year-old Radek Zelenka worries his lip with his teeth as he watches his best friend swimming in the deep end. Miroslav Dvorak -- Mirek to his family and close friends -- is fearless and loves to take risks. Today, Radek's older cousin has brought Radek, Mirek and Radek's five-year-old sister Milena to play in the public swimming pool. Radek is content enough to splash around with little Milena in the shallow end, but Mirek says this is boring. He thinks it's more fun to dive into the deep end of the pool and glide around underwater. Radek looks around and sees Cousin Dušana talking to a pair of teenage boys. Maybe it'll be okay if he jumps in, just once. It does look fun, and Mirek makes it seem easy. Besides, Mirek has dared him, and even at his age, his ego has already matured enough to make it next to impossible for him to refuse the challenge of a dare.
"Stay right here, Milena, and don't move," he says to his sister.
Milena's little hands swirl the water idly around her. Her blue-green eyes are wide and curious. "Why?"
"Because," Radek answers impatiently.
"Because why, Radek?" Milena persists.
"Radek, are you going to jump in or not?" Mirek calls.
"I'm going to play in the deep end with Mirek," Radek tells Milena. "Stay here until I come back."
"What if I don't want to?"
"I'll tell Cousin Dušana."
Milena folds her arms and juts her chin. "Well, I'm going to tell Cousin Dušana you're bossing me around."
"I'm allowed to boss you. I'm the big brother."
Milena sticks out her tongue at him. She chants, "Bossy, bossy, bossy!"
"Stop that," Radek says sternly.
"Or what?"
"Stop it, or I'll...I'll drown you."
He scrambles out of the shallow end and goes to join Mirek, with Milena's shrill voice shouting after him, "You're a mean brother, Radek Zelenka! When we get home, I'm telling Father!"
Mirek glances at Radek and rolls his eyes. Mirek understands. He has a little sister called Jirina, who is three years old. Mirek always says his sister Jirina is a nuisance. Radek disagrees. He thinks little Jirina is pretty and sweet, though he would never admit as much to Mirek. It's his own sister who's a nuisance.
Mirek surveys the pool. "This water is over our heads," he announces. He says it with relish. "It might even be as deep as the ocean."
Neither Radek nor Mirek has ever seen the ocean before, though Radek has read books at the library about sea turtles and whales. Mirek doesn't like to read. He'd rather play soldiers than learn about things he's never seen, so Radek doesn't bother to point out the pool can't possibly be as deep as the ocean. Some parts of the ocean are thousands of metres deep. This pool is only two and a half metres deep, but it does seem like an awful lot of water, just the same.
"You go first," Radek says.
"Are you scared?" says Mirek.
"No. I just want to see how you do it."
Mirek nods his agreement. He steps back several paces. With a running start, he flings himself into the water. There's a tremendous splash, and then a few seconds later, Mirek's head pops out of the water and he's laughing. Mirek says, "Okay, Radek. It's your turn."
All of a sudden, Radek feels as though his belly is full of butterflies. He has to jump in before he gets too scared. He runs toward the edge of the pool, shuts his eyes, and leaps.
The surface of the water feels as solid as ice when he hits it. The air explodes from his lungs, and he gasps and breathes in water. A full second goes by before he realizes he is sinking. He tries to yell, but only succeeds in inhaling more water that makes his nose and throat and lungs burn. He fights to reach the surface, but now he isn't sure where the surface is. Far away, strangely altered by the water in Radek's ears, a voice very like Milena's is screaming his name. Then, someone catches hold of him with strong, slender arms around his middle. He struggles a little, but the person's grip tightens around him and another water-distorted voice tells him everything is going to be okay.
It seems like an eternity passes, but at last he is finally out of the water and safe. He doesn't care what anyone thinks or who might be around to see. He presses his face against Cousin Dušana's shoulder and sobs.
-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x
The slient watcher was visible, now. She had been watching the strangers ever since they arrived, shadowing them through the forest, unseen. Many seasons had passed since she had last seen any like them. She had followed them all the way to the river and then had watched with avid curiosity to see what they would do. When the light-haired one had fallen into the water, his two friends had jumped in after him, so she knew they were loyal and brave, if just a little foolish. They would never reach him by joining him in the current. The silent watcher was more agile than the men, and she knew the river better. If anyone was going to rescue the man who had fallen in, she would have to be the one.
She knew she could catch him at the place where the river became quieter. She did not know why the river flowed more gently in that place, but she thought she remembered a story about it. She could recall few details, but she knew it had something to do with sand. The river became sleepy and slow when it flowed over sand. She ran swiftly to the sandy place where the banks of the river were smooth and the water was sleepy.
She waded into the water. Her alert gaze missed nothing. When she saw the light hair of the stranger break the surface of the water, she knew she had acted rightly in running so fast. She reached out her arms to catch hold of the stranger as the river carried him past her.
He was much heavier than he looked. It took a great deal of effort to pull him from the river and onto the sandy bank, and she was soaked from head to toe herself when she'd gotten him completely out of the water at last. She spared little thought for her own state. She lowered her head to the stranger's chest. She was weak with relief when she felt the steady beating of his heart. He was still alive. She had acted in time. A memory of her father's teachings prompted her to turn the stranger onto his side, and so she did. The man began to gasp, and cough up water.
With trembling fingers, the watcher stroked the man's forehead, brushing tendrils of wet hair away from his eyes. How like her own hair it was, the colour of honey. She wished he would awaken. She did not want to leave him until he opened his eyes, but she knew she couldn't stay. The others would come soon, and she didn't want to be seen here.
A moment passed before she realized the stranger was crying. Perhaps he was frightened? She could not have blamed him if he had been. He'd very nearly drowned. Carefully, she brushed away his tears with her thumbs, and then he opened his eyes. She was enchanted by their colour, which was a striking greenish-blue. She did not know why, but she had expected them to be brown like her own.
The man's lips moved, forming a word the watcher did not understand. Perhaps it was the name of one of his friends? She could not stay to find out. She got to her feet and headed for the trees. By the time the others came, it would be as if she had never been there at all.
-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-
When he awakened, Radek didn't know where he was. His head and chest hurt, and he couldn't remember what had happened to cause the pain. He was lying on something very rough and unyielding, and there was the sound of rushing water nearby. The pool? He'd been dreaming about the pool, but somehow that didn't seem right. He was lying on his side, he realized. Perhaps it would be better if he were lying on his back. He didn't know how difficult accomplishing it would be, but he needed to try. He attempted to roll over, but the pain in his chest increased exponentially with the effort. He heard a cry that he hardly recognized as coming from himself. He knew he shouldn't panic, but he felt his heart rate speed up. He couldn't help it. He was frightened - injured and frightened - a fact pointless to deny. He could not remember how he'd arrived in this place and he didn't know what he should do.
Think, Radek. Call for help, he told himself. If you call out, someone will come and help you.
He took a deep breath, readying himself to try his voice. The action sent a bayonet of pain through his chest that brought an assault of coloured spots behind his eyelids. He exhaled the air from his lungs again in a long, audible wet-sounding hiss. Moisture trickled from the edge of one eye and created a warm, damp streak as it made its inexorable way down the side of his face.
Soldiers don't cry.
The phrase came unbidden from the depths of his memory. Somebody had said it to him once, a long time ago. He hadn't believed it; nevertheless, he had replayed the words over and over in his head, as if repetition might render them true after all. Vojáci nikdy plakat. Soldiers don't cry.
But he wasn't a soldier, not any more. When the country he now called the Czech Republic had still been part of Czechoslovakia, and the army conscripted fresh-faced boys on the threshold of manhood, the Party had said they were soldiers. No matter what the Party chose to call him, Radek had never been a soldier in his heart. He hated the weight of a weapon in his hands and the even greater weight of terror that the weapon gave him the capacity to take a human life. He had never comprehended real dread until the day the notice of his conscription came. The summons had arrived three days after his eighteenth birthday. He'd thought circumstances could never be worse than that, but he'd learned differently. Every day after the summons was a nightmare far greater than the one that had preceded it.
Soldiers don't cry.
Jirina. It was Jirina who had said those words to him. His little angel, his sweet Jirina in all her innocence had unwittingly crushed his already breaking heart. He remembered her face, the way she had gazed at him with such adoration and faith, such…hero-worship in her expression. She was only a child. She did not understand. Her older brother Mirek was proud to become a soldier. Why shouldn't Radek be proud, too? Radek couldn't tell her he believed there was no honour in forcing people to bend to the will of the State. He'd wanted to say he saw nothing noble about indoctrinating naïve boys in the deadly arts of war and calling it a patriotic duty. Jirina was an idealistic little girl. Radek's words wouldn't have been taken as wisdom, but as cowardice, and the last thing Radek would have wanted was to appear a coward in Jirina's eyes.
Jirina was the sister of Radek's best friend, and five years Radek's junior. He had thought of Jirina in much the same way he thought of his own sister, Milena, as someone he wanted to nurture and protect. No matter how annoying Mirek insisted she was, Radek had always refused to let him exclude Jirina from their adventures. Radek liked to teach Jirina new things and he liked to listen to her talk of her plans and ideas. He'd tried never to be impatient or cross with her, and for that he had been rewarded with her devotion and her trust. She was bright and beautiful and full of life. Without ever meaning to, Radek had let her capture his heart, and even though he knew how futile it was, he had loved her. His feelings for Jirina weren't romantic, of course, but somewhere in the secret depths of his consciousness, he had yearned for them to have a romance some day when they were older.
The morning he and Mirek had left for the army, Milena and Jirina had accompanied them to the train. Radek had longed to tell Jirina innumerable things, but he'd been unable to produce most of the words he wanted her to hear. He'd hugged her and told her he would miss her. He'd told her to be good, and that he would write to her sometimes, when he was permitted. He'd been unable to hide his tears when he'd leaned in to place a brotherly kiss on her forehead and say goodbye.
You must be brave, Radek. Soldiers don't cry.
Radek wished he could have been as courageous as Jirina was, and as brave as she expected him to be. He regretted not being able to say the words he wanted to say, but they'd been stuck right behind the lump in his throat.
I love you, Jirina. I hope you don't change too much as you grow up. I promise I'll wait for you, as long as it takes.
Part of him was still waiting. He'd left a piece of his soul in a train station in Prague and he'd never been able to reclaim it because without the benefit of foresight he'd given it to the wrong person for safekeeping. While Radek had been formed in the image of a soldier and an engineer by the Czechoslovakian army, Jirina had been formed in another image entirely. She'd fallen in love with someone else; a man so unlike Radek in his thinking and temperament that Radek wondered what Jirina ever saw in him at all. He couldn't help imagining whether things would have turned out differently if only he'd had the courage to say everything he'd wanted to on that fated morning when he'd boarded the train. Perhaps he would be greeted each morning by Jirina's smile. Perhaps she would dry his tears with her fingers when he woke in the night from a bad dream.
It was no use, he told himself. This was the bad dream. He was inside it, trapped, unable to wake. More warm tears slipped down his face from beneath his closed eyelids. He thought about Colonel Sheppard and the others. Colonel Sheppard promised no one would ever be left behind. Radek could believe they were looking for him now. It was harder to convince himself they would find him. He wished he could remember what had happened. His last clear recollection was the sight of the dark river coming up to meet him and swallow him. Through the ringing in his ears, he'd thought he heard Teyla calling his name. After that, his vision had gone dark, and now he was here.
He listened, straining to catch a familiar sound. He thought he heard the faint hum of insects, but he couldn't be sure. After a moment of intense concentration, he heard something else…someone else. Radek sensed the presence of someone very near to him, and he tensed involuntarily. He felt something soft and cool touch his face. A hand? Yes. Small fingers trembled like nervous birds as they stroked the tears from his cheek.
Radek dared to open his eyes. The image that confronted him made him gasp and then groan as pain spiked in his chest. He coughed twice and finally managed to get a word past his lips.
He whispered, "Jirina...?"
In his mind he knew it wasn't her. Jirina Dvorak was light years away in another galaxy. The face of the woman in front of him was very much like her, though, with wild, tawny hair and large brown eyes. This woman peered at him with such intensity, Radek felt as though she might be looking straight into him. He lowered his eyelids, just for a second, to break the strange woman's intent gaze.
When he opened his eyes again, she was gone.
TBC
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A/N #2 -- Well, off to work for me... I hope you all enjoyed this chapter. I will post the next one probably tomorrow. Oh...and today the breeder is sending me some puppy pictures! yaahhhh! Still very excited here. So, once I get some pics, I might post a link to show off.
