Disclaimer: Don't Own Harry Potter. Never Will.

Ch 4 Revealing those special feelings.

Even though Harry had one of the best days of his life. His life caught back up to him, ten-fold. As soon as Harry fell asleep his nightmares begun, He saw his godfathers death again, he saw Cedric die, he saw his friends dying. He watched helplessly as Voldemort used the Cruciatus on his friends. Making sure that they lose their minds, but not killing them. He heard Voldemort's cold high-pitch laugh. Then suddenly Voldemort turned to him. Then Voldemort wasn't there any longer. But Harry suddenly felt a gigantic pain in his scar. It felt like Voldemort was pressing his presence into him; he could smell Voldemort, the smell of death. Harry felt his scar burn, both in his nightmare and in reality. Voldemort was trying to take over Harry; he had opened the channel between them further.

Of course Harry didn't know all of this... quite yet. But in his dream he felt it, a darkness was surrounding him, it was like a dementor, but worse. It was as if millions upon millions of dementors were surrounding him. All the while he could hear Voldemort's cold laughter. He screamed in pain; as if Voldemort had performed the Cruciatus curse on him. Every single nerve ending exploded in pain, he wanted the pain to end he wanted to die, he begged in his mind for him to die. He was on the ground in a fetal position. But... then it ended... the feel of Voldemort was slowly disappearing, the feel of dementors was going away. The voice of Nymphadora Tonks was way off, but gradually increasing... it was soft... and comforting.

It was as if the Cruciatus curse reversed itself, he could hear Voldemort's screams in the dark he no longer felt Voldemort's presence Harry felt Tonks' presence. She had managed to wrap her arms around his chest. He could feel the warmth flowing through her... he could feel... something else something he had never known before, or at least he had known a version of it; love. He had never felt this feeling before, surely... it must be love... only something so good could feel so right... Her voice was right next to his ear. Then... he felt that same emotion deep within himself, he heard Voldemort's scream of pain increase, yet his screams were fading away. His scar was starting to return back to normal. He felt no more pain he only felt happiness. Want. Love.

Definitely Love. Realization hit him like a ton of bricks that's what that feeling is that he felt every time he was near her. That was how she had that calming effect on him, how she could just simply smile and all of his worries would go away. He loved Nymphadora Tonks. Harry smiled the biggest smile in his life; he whispered her name and slipped into the best dreams Harry had ever had.

Morning never felt so good. When Harry woke up, he had remembered the nightmare, which had turned into the most blissful dream. He still knew that he loved Tonks, now the only problem remained was telling her... and how she will react. Somewhere in his sleep he had turned on his back and she had put her head on his chest. He smiled as he watched her sleep, 'I could get used to this... ' He gently moved his arm to stroke her hair, carefully as to not wake her. He marveled on how it felt, soft as silk. As much as he wanted to keep his hand there, it would be way too awkward of a situation if she were to wake up; he moved it back to its original position. An hour later she stirred awake "Hey sleepy head". Tonks had just simply smiled and looked at him with groggy eyes, "Mornin' Harry"

Harry wasn't exactly for sure if she was just too sleepy to move her head, or if she enjoyed resting her head on his chest. 'Please let it be the second one'... "Hey Tonks... about last night... thank-you. Whatever you had done last night... it helped, hell it more than helped it made..." Not exactly wanting to say Voldemort, in fear that she might get up and leave his chest sooner than he really wanted her too -- which was basically never. "Everything go away"

Tonks was enjoying this position so incredibly much, and by the look Harry was giving her, it told her that he was enjoying it too. Tonks was a little surprised when he said thank you for last night, she didn't think he would remember it. She could tell that he had purposely left something out, but couldn't quite place it. You don't become an Auror and not be able pick up these kinds of things. She could see something in his eyes, gratefulness, admiration, and something else... could it be... love? 'No, it couldn't be... could it?'

"I was glad to Harry, It makes me very happy that I could help get rid of those nightmares" She did not want to get up, yet her grumbling stomach didn't care.

Grumbling just as much as her stomach Tonks got up off of Harry's chest. As soon as her face left his chest she instantly missed the warmth. Like Harry's hair, her green hair was sticking up at random places. 'Food? Or taming the wild?' She looked at Harry; he still had his eyes on her she remembered how skinny he was. She decided food was more important. Grinning evilly when she had turned around, she put an extra swing to her hips.

"Temptress!" She burst out laughing when Harry had said that. So true. Harry had got up to go to the bathroom. She felt a light slap on her ass, which had startled her. She had not expected innocent little Harry to do that! Before she could react Harry sped out of the room and into the bathroom. 'Oh, I'll get him back for that'. She began work on making some eggs and toast. When she was halfway through Harry came back; he had tried to comb his hair, which only succeeded in making it even more unruly.

"I'll get you back for that, Mr. Potter, now I'm going to have to get you twice as hard." Harry smirked at her, "now, now Tonks, didn't your parents ever say not to advertise what you can't sell?" Harry howled with laughter at the look on her face while she tried to piece together what he had said. Realization dawned on her after a couple of seconds 'Damn that was good.' "Well, Mr. Potter it looks like you are getting too smart for your own good" Harry just snickered.

"I think I'm having a very bad effect on you, Mr. Potter. Flirting shamelessly with an Auror. Shame on you."

Of course she already knew that she was the one that starts it, but she couldn't help but tease him some more, he was such a good sport about it. She started to put the eggs and toast on the table sat down and began to eat.

"Well, when the Auror is as beautiful as you, it can't be helped." 'Wait, what? Did he just say... ' She looked at him, his eyes were huge, and he had a guilty look on his face. The shock of what he had said wore off, now was her chance. She grinned evilly. Payback. "Oh, Harry... what was that?" If possible Harry's eyes grew larger.

"Uh, umm, uh" She could tell he was struggling with words, his eyes were searching everywhere for some kind of help; Tonks loved this. She was laughing inwardly at his struggle to find an answer, without saying the already obvious answer.

'WHAT THE HELL DID I SAY THAT FOR?' Harry relentlessly berated himself. He hadn't meant to say that, he didn't want to say that. Any relationship with her that he had ever wanted was sure to be gone now. If there was even a chance to begin with. Getting ready to apologize for saying that Harry finally looked into her eyes. Even with this situation, he couldn't help but help feel an amazing sense of calm over-take him. He could also see something in her eyes... something that he had felt during that dream of his. 'Love?'

He was becoming lost on those beautiful blue eyes of hers, "I said, when the Auror is as beautiful as you, Tonks are, it can't be helped" 'You are dead, you know that? By the time she is done with you, all you will be is a pile of ash' Even as those thoughts went through his head, he couldn't help but feel calm. He couldn't help but smile when she had looked surprised when he had said that. He saw that look come into her eyes again, 'Could it possibly be love? No... who could love a scrawny boy' clearly Tonks was struggling with something to say, not that he could blame her.

"Since when have we had this great push of courage to say this, Harry?" Harry smiled, already knowing the answer to that.

"Since I realized that I love you" Harry's eyes widened when he realized what he had said. His blood froze and his brain stopped dead. He couldn't believe he had voiced what he was thinking. 'Crap. I'm so dead... I'm beyond dead; she's going to feed me to the Dementors. No wait, to Lucious Malfoy...'

"Y- you do?" He couldn't meet her eyes; he didn't want to see the fury in them. Yet, when she had said that it didn't sound like rage, or of pity. He looked into those beautiful eyes of hers, expecting to see anything but what he saw. Love. "Yes. I wasn't for sure at first, seeing how I've never known the feeling before. Last night though... when I had that nightmare... I knew I loved you... when I woke up this morning, the feeling only doubled."

'He can't be serious, this has to be some kind of joke. Somehow he found out about my... love for him and he's teasing me about it.'

'Don't be thick, look into his eyes, you know that he is telling the truth'. Tonks looked back to Harry's eyes, in that instant all of her fears vanished. She could see the fear in his eyes, fear of the impending rejection. "Harry"

'This is it, she's going to tell me that she can't believe that I said that, and that it was just hormones'

"I love you too" She saw the fear linger in his eyes for a few moments longer, for a split second she saw confusion. Then full blown love and happiness. He smiled one of the biggest smiles she had seen yet. 'Oh yes, the Order is really going to kill me now'.

"Harry, we're going to have to work on your Occlumency, now that we are together, Voldemort must NOT know of this" She knew she was ruining the mood. She didn't want too, Merlin knows how much she just wanted to sit there and stare into his eyes, and openly show how much she loves him. Still, the threat of Voldemort gaining knowledge of Harry and Tonks together was an ever looming frightening knowledge. Soon as she had said this, she saw the disappointment in his eyes.

"Not with Professor Snape, Harry. With me, I'm not as great with Occlumency but I can get you on the road of knowing it. Then you'll have to learn with Professor Snape, or... if Dumbledore isn't too busy, then with him." That seemed to cheer him up a great deal.

"I was already planning on teaching you Occlumency, but because of shared feelings, the need is even greater. We'll start after we get done eating. I want you to start clearing out your mind, while I take a shower. I know it might be a little hard but I promise a reward if you successfully block me during one of the three times."

'Hell, I may be an Auror, but after finally sharing my feelings with him, I'm going

have to show him how much I love him'. When they had finished their food, Harry walked to his bed and started clear out his mind.

Tonks smirked. Hedwig had arrived back sometime during their breakfast, without a note attached. Tonks went to get a piece of parchment, a quill, and some ink.

'Dear,

Molly

This is Tonks; I'm staying with Harry at the Dursleys. I had to find out how they were treating him; the poor boy was starved. I know how much of a good cook you are so I was wondering if you could send some of your recipes. I don't exactly know much, so if you can I would be extremely thankful.

Sincerely

N. Tonks'

Rereading it a few times, to make sure that the letter didn't reveal anything in case it was intercepted. She called Hedwig to her and attached the parchment to her leg. "Take this to Mrs. Weasley for me please" Hedwig hooted a reply and flew out of the window. Glancing at Harry before she went off to take her shower.

Harry was beyond happy. She hadn't killed him! Hell, even better she loved him back. He wanted to clear his mind so much, but images of Tonks kept popping into his head. 'Must... Clear mind... Think of the reward if you manage it' After a while, he had finally managed to do it. His mind was completely blank by the time Tonks had came in. "Alright Harry ready to begin?" He smiled and opened his eyes. What he saw caught him off guard. His eyes bugged out and his jaw dropped. There stood Tonks, in the shortest pair of shorts he had ever seen -- he wasn't even for sure if they were shorts. With a very tight shirt that clung to her like a second skin. He could tell she wasn't wearing any type of underwear underneath... Both were blue that matched her blue hair, which was long enough to reach her shoulders.

One word came to mind when he saw her, 'Damn.' Tonks laughed at his reaction.

"I'll take that as a good sign" Tonks said. She leaned over and closed his jaw with her finger. When she removed her finger she turned serious. "Get ready Harry. Remember clear your mind... Legilimens!"

Harry was able to block her spell for a little while, but she pushed into his mind with more force. Memories of him staying with the Dursleys when he got 'home' from Hogwarts ruptured into Tonks' connection with Harry. How Vernon would stand over him while he wrote his response to the Order. Memories of how alone and alienated he felt while no one could help him, how helpless he felt with the battle against Voldemort, how scared he was that he was the one that was destined to kill him, or be killed. Then memories of Tonks coming over saying that she was going to live with him came.

As soon as the memory's came they stopped, "Very good Harry, you blocked me when I didn't use much force to enter your mind. Yet, you gave way when I used more force to enter your mind. I'm going to use as much force as I did to enter your mind, so get ready. One, two, three Legilimens!"

Harry was a little more prepared for her, he had been out of practice -- not that he got much practice with Snape, but he knew what he needed to do. Tonks had to try three more times before she could barge into his mind. Memories of the nightmare came flooding back to him, he watched helplessly as everything once again happened, then the memory of the feel of Tonks against him, the love radiating from her. Yet again, the memories stopped as soon as they had begun.

"EXCELLENT HARRY! You had almost completely blocked me! Merlin's beard, you're a fast learner. All you needed was pretty little me to help you out too"

Tonks gave Harry a wink. She didn't give him enough time to think though, as soon as she had given that wink she had performed legilimency on him. Even though he was caught off-guard he resisted her until she had used her full power to enter his mind. Memories of being scared shitless when he told Tonks how he felt toward her, scared how it took her a few seconds -- which had seemed like an eternity to Harry, to show how she felt toward him.

How happy he was when she told him the thing he was hoping to hear most. How he had just wanted to lean across the table and kiss her head on. Then Harry was back in reality; Tonks was beaming at him. Which he couldn't help but return,

"Now THAT Harry, was excellent... if I'm not mistaken, I do think I owe you a reward" Harry had practically forgotten about the reward, all those memories, and Tonks' praise had driven it from his mind. He saw the glint of mischief in her eyes. Tonks leaned in to kiss Harry, seeing this he leaned in as well. When their lips touched both Tonks and Harry felt electricity run through them.

Harry cupped her cheek with his right hand and deepened the kiss. 'This is heaven, I've died and I'm in heaven' Tonks leaned in more to help deepen the kiss.

Tonks was thinking along the same lines as Harry was. She started to run her hands through his hair, 'God I've always wanted to do this'. She traced the bottom of his lip with her tongue, he responded without a moment's hesitation. Their tongues met and they battled for domination over each other. She felt his hands go under her shirt and roam her back and her front. Getting near but not close enough to touch her breasts. Every place he touched her skin was set aflame.

With great effort -- meaning using every single ounce of will power she had she separated the kiss. Still close to his face she stared directly into his eyes. His hands had stopped roaming but they were still at the same spot on her sides.

"That, Tonks, was the best reward I have ever received in my life" Harry said huskily. Tonks smiled and agreed.

"Me too". Tonks moved from his bed, and went to the window. Hedwig was standing there with a piece of parchment tied to her leg. Tonks let her in; Hedwig flew onto her shoulder and rested there. Tonks smiled and untied the parchment while she walked to the "kitchen" part of Harry's room, and got some water and owl treats -- Tonks had some in her trunk.

'Dear,

Tonks

That's fantastic that you are there to help Harry out. We were worried when he had declined to come over to the Burrow. Not even Dumbledore could help out. On the back of this parchment is some recipes of Harry's favorite meals. Send Hedwig back, I already made some food for you and him. Errol can't work anymore and Pig is being used right now. Send Harry my love, Ron says hi.

Sincerely,

Molly Weasley'

Tonks smiled to herself, and looked down at the bottom. There were about five hundred recipes. She could tell that it was enchanted to show the recipie by tapping your wand on the name. 'This is going to be really interesting'. While Tonks was looking at the recipes Harry had come up behind her and encircled her waist with his arms. He had his head propped up on her right shoulder and was reading the letter. 'I could really get used to this' She leaned into him, which he responded by tightening his arms around her waist and a kiss on her neck.

"You don't have to cook for me if it is difficult for you to cook, I've got plenty of experience with it, and I'd be more than glad to cook for the both of us" Tonks smiled, he seemed to read what was going on in her mind. She knew that she should cook, but usually if she tried to cook anything it always came out burnt. "If you really want too Harry, then sure."

Tonks turned around in his grasp and kissed him again. He pulled her even more to himself, which in turn made her deepen the kiss. The grumbling of their stomachs broke the kiss. The two broke the kiss laughing. Harry snatched the parchment from her hand and got to work on one of the recipes. "HEY! That was mine!"

"Keyword: Was yours, love. Seeing as how we are both hungry and you agreed to let me do the cooking." Groaning out of mock-anger, Tonks sat down and watched him work. Tonks had to admit to herself, he looked good while he was working. What he was making she had no idea, but it smelt amazingly good. While he was cooking, Tonks had let Hedwig back out to collect the food that Mrs. Weasley was making. She sat back down, and continued to watch him. After about ten minutes of cooking he was finally done. Pot Roast, with mash potatoes and gravy, and steak and kidney pie.

It looked and smelled delicious, she dove in as soon as he had placed it on the table. Harry did too, although he still kept some of his manners. They ate in silence -- mainly seeing how they had so much food stuffed in their mouths that they couldn't talk. When they finished eating Tonks let out a sigh of content, "Harry, THAT was very excellent"

"Glad you liked it" Tonks brought out her wand and with a flick of her wrist the dishes were cleaning themselves. Harry laughed seeing this, "you read my mind" Tonks chuckled as well.

"Oh yes. Well Harry, we have some work to do. Got to prefect some of your skills and I'm going to have to owl Severus or see if Dumbledore will be able to teach you Occlumency, well... more like polish the technique." She knew that that was going to get Harry down. So she came prepared.

"Like last time, when you're able to completely block him from your mind then I'll give you

an award" This definitely had perked Harry up.

"So, what skills are we going to have to perfect?" Harry asked.

"Protection, that's a definite, then when you are able to start completely throwing off big spells then we will start with transfiguring. That will definitely come in handy, after that... hmm, I have no idea. But, when you regain some of that lost weight, we are going to have to get you a little more muscled. As a just in case. Also I'm going to have to make some healing potions for when we start with the shields." Harry seemed to like everything she said.

"Excellent, I look forward to it all." She smiled at this; the only thing she was worried was about was Severus finding about them two. She already knew Dumbledore wouldn't be able to come, he was too busy.

Indeed, Harry was definitely looking forward to it all. Especially the reward that awaited him. 'Cannot wait to see what it will be'.

"Um, Tonks... How are we going to be able to practice? I mean... How am I going to be able to practice? I can't use magic out of school". That seemed to snap Tonks out of her enthusiasm.

"Crud... well... ok... there goes that idea... well maybe I could speak to the

Minister... no, no... he hates you..." Harry was laughing inwardly, she looked extremely cute when she was in deep-thought. While she was trying to find out how Harry could use magic outside of school, Harry went to the window and let Hedwig in. Who had carried a rather large box. She looked extremely tired. Harry muttered a word of thanks to Hedwig and stroked her a little. He then let her fly up and onto his shoulder where he led her into her cage so that she could eat, drink and get some rest. Harry chuckled some more when he noticed that Tonks hadn't noticed that he had left his chair. While Tonks was still trying to figure out what to do, Harry's scar started to burn, he tried to block it, but it was hopeless. He felt the pain increase as he tried to block it, he pressed one hand on his scar, and one on the table to keep himself from falling. The pain was still increasing; he started to hear Voldemort's malicious laugh from somewhere. Off in the distance he heard Tonks yell his name, but he couldn't focus where it was coming from. The pain was blinding now, he struggled to keep the dark from taking him over, but the pain only increased when he did.

The last thing he remembered before he blacked out was Tonks looking at him full of concern.

Authors Note: Looking so much better isn't it?