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Chapter 38

1920s Downton Abbey

The moment Mary stepped out from her bathroom, Anna had to pick her jaw up from the floor. She couldn't stop staring. Mary seemed to notice and her cheeks reddened, as she walked up closer to her lover.

"Anna?" Mary playfully said, licking her lips.

"I love this outfit on you," Anna said, her mouth dry. "I wish I could go and watch you ride."

"I wish you could ride with me," Mary replied. She placed her hand on Anna's cheek and drew her closer, pressing her lips against hers.

"I've never ridden before," Anna answered.

"Never?"

Anna shook her head. She closed her eyes, as Mary's fingers moved down along her neck. She felt Mary's hand massage against her shoulder and then her lips meet hers again. Anna opened her lips slightly and allowed Mary's tongue to breech her mouth. She happily sighed.

"Well, we must fix that, darling," Mary told her. "I will take you riding soon."

Anna's eyes opened. "You don't have to do that."

"I want to."

Mary stepped back then and turned to sit at her vanity. Anna walked behind her and lifted up the hat placing it gently on Mary's head. It put the whole outfit together.

"I can't wait to take you out of this," Anna bit down on her lower lip. Her cheeks grew hot.

"I can't either, but we do have to wait. I'm needed downstairs shortly." Mary touched the bottom of her locks, making sure they were placed just so. Then she stood and touched Anna's cheek lovingly, once more. "I do hate I'll be missing the picnic with you today, Anna. But I'll be expected to entertain most of the day."

"It'll be alright. Thomas has offered to take the boys to the pond to go fishing. So I am going to try and spend some time with Pippa."

"Oh darling, yes, that sounds wonderful. You deserve some time alone with her. I'm sure she'll love it. Now, I must go, but don't worry, I won't take this off without you."

-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-

Once Anna had finished eating her breakfast, Anna quickly made her way up the stairs to pick up Pippa for a little while. Today she had very little on her plate and so she wanted to spend as much of that time alone with Pippa.

Walking toward the room, she passed Thomas and the boys. Johnny and George happily waved, grinning. They were thrilled to spend their morning fishing with Thomas. He treated them like an uncle and they adored it. Anna was grateful for him. Neither boy had a father. So she was glad they had a male figure who cared to take some time with them. Though, Anna never would have guessed that figure would be Thomas.

She turned the corner and entered the nursery. A smile grew on her lips. Pippa was handing Marigold her beloved doll. She helped Marigold hold the doll like a baby and then patted Marigold's head.

"Good job!" Pippa encouraged. "You can play with her."

Anna's hand came up to her heart. She knew Pippa to be a sweet child, but it was lovely to see her kindness with Marigold. Little Marigold smiled up to Pippa and she gently rocked the baby.

"Pippa," Anna said, letting her presence known. Pippa looked up and stood from where she was sitting on the floor next to Marigold. "Would you like to come out for a walk with me?"

Pippa twisted her lips and looked back toward Marigold.

"Can Goldie come?" Pippa questioned with her little lisp. She was a talker, much more than both boys had been at this age. Sometimes her words were hard for others to understand, but Anna always knew what Pippa said. She adored that Pippa had shortened Marigold's name to Goldie. It was so Pippa and her personality. Anna wasn't sure she called anyone by their actual name.

"I don't know, darling," Anna furrowed her brow. She looked to Nanny. Nanny Jones wasn't in the room.

"Please!" Pippa tried again. She rushed to Anna and grasped at her hands, before jumping up and down. "Please! Please! Nah-Nah, Please!"

Marigold even stood and went by Pippa. She gave a shy smile.

"Nanny, what do you think?"

"The girls love spending time together," Nanny shrugged. "And Nanny Jones won't be here until after lunch. She's on a half day since Mr. Barrow was taking the boys this morning."

"Well, alright then," Anna grinned down at the girls. Pippa took Marigold's hand and the little girl giggled. Anna was sure that was the first time she heard the girl make a sound.

Anna took Pippa's hand. She led them down the hallway and down the stairs. When they reached outside, Pippa immediately let go of her hand and asked Marigold if she wanted to run. Marigold eagerly nodded and the two little girls started dashing ahead.

"Girls, hold on for me," Anna happily called out. She chased after them, causing laugher from both girls. She swooped Pippa up and turned her around.

"Now me!" Marigold insisted. As Anna placed Pippa back onto the grass, she began to chase after Marigold. The little girl paused her run and turned toward Anna, lifting up her arms to be picked up. Anna quickly lifted her into her arms and spun her much like she had spun Pippa.

"Again, again!" Both girls insisted. Anna stopped a moment, catching her breath.

"Why don't we go and pick some flowers," Anna suggested. She didn't know how much more chasing and lifting she could do. It was best to curve their energies into something else.

The girls agreed. They took each other's hands and walked into the big field of flowers. Anna watched as they chatted back and forth, showing one another what they had found. It was darling. And though Anna had wanted some time alone with Pippa, she had to admit this was also invaluable. She was able to see her daughter with her dearest friend. It made the smile permanent on Anna's lips.

"Marigold!" A shrill voice made Anna turn. She saw Edith rushing toward them. Marigold twisted her lips and looked to Edith.

When Edith made it up to them, she snatched up Marigold and made a heavy huff.

"Please do not take Marigold without my permission from the nursery, Anna," Edith coolly stated.

"I…well, I asked Nanny. She and Pippa were having such fun…." Anna tried.

"I think it's best Marigold stay inside unless she's with me or her nanny," Edith just said. "Come on Marigold."

Anna frowned, but knew it was better not to argue. She didn't want to cause any issues. Pippa, however, had no fear. She ran after Edith and tugged on her hand.

"Please," she begged. "Please, can Goldie play?"

"Here," Anna gently unhooked Pippa's hand from Edith's and lifted her up into her arms. Edith turned her head to look at Pippa.

"Mary really just lets her do whatever she wants, doesn't she?"

Anna felt very protective in that moment. She placed her hand on Pippa's back and held her closer.

"Lady Edith, they were playing so sweetly together."

"Perhaps," Edith sighed, "But I really prefer I get asked next time." With that, she walked away.

Anna glanced down at Pippa who was now frowning. She rested her head against Anna's chest and Anna rubbed her hand up and down her daughter's back.

"You'll get to play with her in a little bit," Anna promised. Pippa's little thumb went back into her mouth. It happened whenever she was sad or tired.

"Edie is a stick in the mud," Pippa then said, sitting up. Anna had to bite her tongue to keep from laughing out loud.

"Now, Pippa, we don't say that. Who told you such a thing?" Anna weakly scolded. Pippa shrugged her shoulders.

"Lady!"

"Oh, of course, she did," Anna had to chuckle then. "Come on, darling, why don't we go and see if we can't see Lady riding on her horse."

"Oh yay!"

-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-X-

"She did what?" Mary seethed. Anna had explained the confrontation she had with Edith earlier that day.

"It's alright," Anna insisted. "I shouldn't have taken Marigold with us. That was my fault."

Mary shook her head. "I should go right now…"

But Anna stopped her. She placed her hand on Mary's shoulder and then ran it down Mary's jacket, before taking her hand and pulling her close.

"No," Anna murmured, as their noses touched. "Please don't make something into this. I don't want to cause any more issues. Plus, I really want to enjoy these trousers you are wearing."

Mary felt the blush on her cheeks. She turned.

"These trousers?" She teased.

"Yes, they fit you so perfectly and outline your derriere perfectly."

Mary loved the way Anna's lower lip was tucked between her teeth. She completely forgot what they had been talking about earlier. Instead, she inhaled slowly and then reached up to tug at her hat.

"No, leave it on."

-X-X-X-X-X-X-

Mary played with the long necklace around her neck. The entire evening, her thoughts had been with Anna and their afternoon together. A smile graced her lips. She hoped for a repeat tonight.

She entered her bedroom and was surprised to find Pippa standing at her vanity. The little girl had opened all of the drawers and was placing rouge on her cheeks. Mary stayed back to watch, trying not to giggle at the dark red on Pippa's face. The little girl pulled out a necklace from one drawer and brought it over her neck. Then she looked in the mirror. That was when she noticed Mary. Quickly she turned and gave a bashful shy from being caught.

"Well, now, what do we have here?" Mary questioned, walking over toward Pippa. "You look beautiful, darling."

Mary sat down on the chair in front of the vanity and Pippa crawled up into her lap, resting her head back against Mary. Mary smiled at them both in the mirror. Her mama was right; Pippa did look like her, though her hair had more of curl to it. And Mary could notice the distinct features in Pippa's face that belonged to Anna. Her hand came up to touch the little nose that so matched her mother's.

"Why don't I have a mama?"

Pippa's question knocked the air out of Mary's lungs. She had been prepared for this question to be asked. However, she didn't expect it to happen so early.

"Darling…."

"Will you be my mama? Can I call you mama?" Pippa turned in her lap so she could meet Mary's eyes. Mary brushed her hand through Pippa's long, dark hair. She bent forward and kissed the little girl's cheek. Then she stood up with Pippa in her arms and walked her over to the bed, placing the little girl next to her.

"You do have a mama, darling," Mary explained. "And she loves you very much."

"I do," Pippa questioned. Her eyes grew wide.

"Yes, sweet girl. Your mama loves you, Pippa. Oh, how she loves you."

"Where is she?" Mary pursed her lips together. Today she couldn't tell her. Pippa was still too young. Mary had never expected her little girl to be able to comprehend such questions at such a young age. But shouldn't they have known by now how bright the little girl was?

"I can't tell you that, not right now," Mary honestly replied. "But I love you too, you know?"

Pippa nodded. "So you can be my mama?"

"I do love you as a mother would," Mary agreed. "But I don't think you should call me mama, not right now. One day, I think you'll want to save that title for someone else."

Pippa furrowed her brows. She climbed back into Mary's arms and cuddled up against her.

"She loves me?"

"So very much," Mary repeated. She ran her hand up and down the little girl's back. "You are so loved, my Pippa."

The little girl fell asleep in Mary's arms. She held her for several minutes, before taking her back to the nursery. She found Nanny a worried mess, but Mary told her it was fine and not to worry.

Placing Pippa into her bed, she carefully took off the necklace and smiled down at the rouge on her cheeks. She bent over and kissed the tip of her nose. As Mary turned, she saw Edith was walking inside the room to tell Marigold goodnight. Their eyes met. Then Edith's eyes fell onto Pippa's face and she rolled her eyes.

"What? Do you not allow Marigold to play in your things?" Mary just bit. She then walked past her sister and waited patiently for Anna to come to bed for the night.

-X-X-X-X-X-X-

Anna was trying not to show how much it upset her. Mary told her about what Pippa had asked her. She sniffled and felt as Mary's arms wrapped around her in the bed. Slowly, Anna turned onto her back and met Mary's eyes.

"You can, you know," Anna whispered, trying not to cry.

"I can, what, darling?"

"Let her call you mama," Anna replied. "You are her mother, too."

"No," Mary quietly disagreed. "One day, though, we will tell her the truth. We will know when the time is right and we will tell her then."

Anna sighed, not so sure that the day would ever come. It seemed too tricky. Mary seemed to read her mind and placed her hand on Anna's.

"There will be a day and it will come sooner than you think, Anna." Anna didn't respond. Mary kissed her brow. "You look exhausted, darling, why don't we go to sleep."

Spring 1971

"Mama?" Pippa questioned her sleeping mother. It was about to rain and she was sleeping in the chair on the back porch at the beach. Anna's eyes opened and she met Pippa's eyes. Pippa smiled, reaching out to touch her mother's cheek. Her mother was the strongest person she knew. She was often in awe of all she went through and how she always put Mother and the children first.

"Oh my Pippa," Anna breathed. Pippa gently grasped her hands.

"Come on, Mama. Mother is already inside. Johnny started a fire. It's getting cold."

"You know I love you." Pippa smiled.

"Mama, of course, I do. I love you too. Let's go inside."

To be continued...

If you are interested in the M one-shots for this story, there will be a new one that goes along with this chapter coming up sometime this week in If Love: Confidential. Thank you again for reading! More soon!