Fred was sitting alone, alone in a somewhat dark place. She didn't remember how she got there or even how long she had been sitting there. All she remembered was being sick and at home with Wesley holding her tight.
She knew she was dying and there was nothing anyone could do for her. She felt so helpless and in terrible pain. It was the worst feeling in the world, to know you are dying, and are unable to stop the impending doom just helplessly waiting for it to happen.
She felt worse for Wesley having to watch her slowly disappear. He wanted to help her so badly but there was nothing that could be done. She wanted to tell him that she loved him, that she would be ok and that if anything the time they had spent together was a blessing. The thing that scared her the most was that she would not be able to say goodbye to her parents.
She had been in this place for a long time, or so she thought. Actually, she had no idea just how long she had been there. So time seemed to be unimportant after all, like this is were she was supposed to be so why care about time. She sat and thought about all the things that had happened in her life.
It was as if she was supposed to be doing something but she could not think of what it was. Every once in a while she felt like she could see things happening, like it was her but it wasn't. She saw these things happening and had strong feelings about what she should do and then things just seemed to...go that way. She thought it was like watching a soap opera of her life and directing it from afar. Dreams are what they felt like to her, but often she wished it were really her doing them.
At one point she finally remembered that her body had been taken over by an Old One. She was suppose to be gone, her body to be used by this god and her soul dead. So why was she here in this place? What was going on with her body? Why if her soul was gone would she be sitting in this dark place all alone?
She felt this Old One enter her body, like she had something shoved hard into a small space and there was no place left for her except this spot; a tiny dark spot that showed her small glimpses of her life but was it really her life that she was seeing?
Then all of a sudden things changed. The small cramped and darkened place she was slowly began to widen and brighten. She thought it was time for her to move on to heaven or where ever you go when you die. Like some angel would come and guide her to the gates of the Promised Land.
After exploring around, she found that besides the brightness she was now experiencing, nothing else had really changed. She looked for a door or passageway or anyplace to get out of there. She just wandered around aimlessly for what seemed like days. That was when she felt the concept of time truly hit her. How long had she actually been wandering around in this endless space? How long had she huddled in the dark? She thought at one point she heard someone calling her name but she could never truly reach them. It was eerie and for the first time since she got there she felt fear and loneliness.
As her frustration began to build, she once again thought she heard someone calling her name. She follow the sound of the light voice calling her name. Then out of the corner of her eye she saw a bright light. It started as a small glimmer then began to grow brighter and brighter.
Everything in this place was dull and had no color or form, so when the pretty pink light started she felt drawn to it. Then the light flashed and she closed her eyes at the severe brightness of it. When she opened her eyes she got the shock of her life. There was a woman standing in front of her. She got so excited that she ran to the woman and instantly grabbed her into a tight hug.
"Oh my god!... How did you get here? I am so glad to see you." She backed away finally and greeted her friend with a bright smile. "Sorry, it's just…… I haven't seen you in like……forever, I mean it could be forever because time has no meaning here though you could track it if you had something to time it but o'well...no pen." She giggled at her friend.
"No problem Fred, I'm kind of glad to see you too. Say you about ready to get out of hear or what?" She asked her smiling brightly.
"Oh, yes, of course I am. Are you here to take me to heaven with you? I mean I know your dead and all so I figure it must be time for me since..well you know me being dead and all." Fred was sad about going to heaven but happy that Cordelia was the one to guide her.
"No Fred, you have the wrong idea. I know I'm all with the dead and everything but your not. I mean, well its hard to explain, I am here to guide you back to reality. You're not dead just…. lost in a small corner of your own mind. When Illyria took over your body, your soul was not supposed to survive, but it did. Something happened when she took over your body, she got your body but your soul was sent here. This place is special, you had such a strong will to live that the PTB decided to give your mind this recess to save you. They knew that with the right people helping, you would one day be able to reclaim that which was once yours. That's how they put it anyway, what ever, I don't really get it but it's time to go home Fred, all your friends are waiting for you. You have a lot more work ahead of you so let's get a move on, ok?" Cordy knew Fred would understand.
"Ooook, I kind of get it…..I think. So, what you're trying to tell me is that I get my body back. I get to go home and you don't. I hardly think that's fair Cordy." Fred was happy but sad at the same time. She wanted Cordy back and she knew that it was not going to happen for her friend.
"Awe, that's so sweet Fred and I love you too. I did everything I was suppose to do in life and the only reason for me to ever want to go back would be…… well, shopping on Rodeo drive sounds peachy. It's ok Fred, I like were I am now, and for perc's I get to help my friends every once in a while." Cordy was happy to be able to help her friend out. She knew that most things were out of her control but when she could convince them to let her, she would lend a helping hand.
"Alright, I guess it's time then, so what do I need to do?" Fred smiled and clasped her hands together.
"Well, all you have to do is walk thru that door." Cordy pointed over Fred's shoulder.
"Wow where did that come from? I have been walking around here forever and I never saw it." Fred turned around to see where she was pointing.
"Yea, that was the point of my coming here. You are so smart Fred but sometimes you can be really dumb." Cordy missed this, joking with her friend in tense situations. It put a huge smile on her face, and when Fred turned back to give her a mean stare for the comment Cordy grabbed a hold of her. She hugged Fred for a long moment then gently released her.
"It was good to see you Fred. I know everything will be ok. Please tell the gang I love and miss them and for gods' sake try and stay out of trouble. I won't always be able to bail you all out of these messes you know."
Fred smiled, gave her another hug before she walked towards the doorway. Just as Fred reached the opening she heard Cordy yell behind her, "Oh, and Fred, tell Angel I said that everything is as it should be." With another bright flash Cordy was gone. Fred lightly laughed and walked thru the door with her eyes closed shut.
When she opened her eyes the first thing she saw was the white ceiling in the room they had put her in. Wesley had left moments before to visit the restroom. She adjusted her eyes and began to look around. She was in what looked like a hotel room. It was similar to the room she had at the Hyperion. She sat up slowly and put her feet on the ground. It was so nice to feel something solid again. It felt like years since she had breathed, or smelled, or even touched anything. She wondered were everyone was, so she strolled over to the door and out into the hallway.
She looked up and down the hallway until she finally realized she was at the Hyperion. All of a sudden she heard a scream from behind her and she jumped and turned around quickly to see that it was Wes. He walked out of the bathroom and saw her standing in the doorway. In his utter shock, he screamed as he ran towards her. She smiled and held out her arms to welcome him. He ran to her and locked his arms securely around her and let out a whimper.
"Bloody hell woman, you nearly caused me a heart attack." Wesley finally said right before he captured her mouth in a heated kiss. She was caught off guard by the sudden feel of his hot lips on hers but as soon as he began to rub his tongue across her lips she parted her mouth and allowed him access. The kiss was hot and full of longing passion that it nearly took her breath away. She never wanted to let him go ever again.
They kissed until Fred felt like she may pass out. She wasn't sure if it was the longing for Wes or the overwhelming feeling of hunger that was doing it. She stumbled a little and Wes steadied her, "Are you ok darling. Thank god you woke, I was afraid that you may never regain consciousness." Wesley was trying to be calm but he was screaming on the inside. He wanted to bellow to the heavens that his love was alive and ok but he was afraid he may scare her.
"I'm fine Wes, just a little hungry. Any tacos lying around here anywhere?" Fred smiled and gave him another peck on the lips.
"Right, it has been some time since you ate real food. I will run to the kitchen and see what I can whip up. You may want to rest; as soon as the gang hears you're awake you will have a room full. I will inform Angel then go get you something to eat. Be back momentarily love." Wesley then walked her over to the bed, kissed her, and left the room in search of his friends.
It didn't take Wesley long to locate the rest of the gang. By the time he reached the end of the hallway he could hear Angel and Spike in a shouting match. It was common for them and usually he didn't pay too much attention to it. They never really argued about anything important.
As per usual, he reached the top of the steps and saw them sparing in the lobby and having the usual argument. He also saw Buffy and Illyria sitting on the couch watching the two fight, well, argue and spar at the same time. It amused him and he giggled to himself as he watched the two women watch the men with a similar look on their faces.
It was a strange look, like a cross between confused and funny at the same time. He stood there and watched for a few minutes before slowly descending the steps. "Good afternoon all, I see we are a little bored today." They all turned to look at a happy Wesley coming down the stairs.
Angel took that as a good sign and asked "Is she awake? Can we go see her?"
"Yes she is, and please do. I am sure that she will be happy to see you all. Any idea where Gunn has run off to? I would like him to know about Fred." Wesley was so happy that he didn't think anything could ruin his mood.
"No, haven't seen Charlie boy in days. He must o' found a sweet crib to crash." Spike said as he walked to the weapons cabinet to put his sword away. He walked over to Angel and took his sword from him, "Hey Peaches, maybe you should go see her first. Don't want to rush all in at once you know. Had to be one hell of a ride getting back into that body and all, let us know when you're finished." Spike took the weapon and nodded his head at his sire.
Angel walked up to the door and lightly knocked. He waited to hear his invitation in order to walk into her room. It didn't take long before he heard, "Come in Angel, you're always welcome here." He smiled and opened the door.
He didn't have the words to describe how happy he was to see her again so he picked up her hand and kissed it.
She smiled at him and turned her head to the side, "What was that? Come here you big softy." And she grabbed him for a big hug. When they parted Angel was smiling from ear to ear.
"Hey, don't get too happy on me now, I don't need another episode of Angelus fun again." Fred laughed as she said this to him.
"A lot has changed since you have been gone Fred, my permeate soul for one." She nearly jumped out of the bed when he stated this which made him laugh even harder.
"HOLLY SHIT……are you joking?" Fred was totally shocked. How did they do it?
"Very serious, my soul is one thing I would never joke about." She knew he was serious, and she couldn't help but to grab him and hug him all over again.
"Angel, I am so happy for you. I haven't told Wes yet, but, when I was asleep Cordy came to see me. She was so beautiful; I wish you could have seen her. She told me to tell you that everything is as it should be, but honestly at the time I wasn't sure why she said it." Fred wanted to tell Angel that while they were alone.
"Thanks Fred, I am glad she was there to help you, sometimes I feel like she is always there watching over us. I think maybe you should rest now; there will be time to catch you up on everything later. For the time being you have several friends who want a chance to see you." With that said Angel kissed Fred on top of her head and left the room.
Fred was so happy to be home, yes she had lots of questions for everyone but at least now she felt she had the time to do it. She lay back on the bed and rested her eyes. She felt happy and at peace, Cordy was right, everything was as it should be.
