Standard disclaimers apply. I don't own FFVII, never can and never will.
I felt like writing something silly, and this idea just suddenly popped into my head. Sorry all Yuffentine fans but this will most definitely not be Vincent/Yuffie. I just find that pairing… Disturbing. No offence! I know there's a lot of Yuffentine supporters out there.
This will be a Cloud/Yuffie and a sort of Vincent/Tifa. I've never tried a Cloud/Yuffie before and I thought it'll be interesting, so here I am writing this. Just wanted to try something new.
I, Yuffie Kisaragi, am officially in love.
…What? Now you take that back! So what if I'm only 16! I'm old enough, thank you very much. I don't need another (ugh) overly-protective father around me, no way! I've already got one back at Wutai already, and trust me – he's a handful! I mean, you haven't seen PROTECTIVE until you meet my dad! You wouldn't believe how crazy he was when I was a kid, for example, that time when I was six years old. Being the innocent, young (and have I mentioned beautiful?) thing that I was then – and still am now, of course – I just couldn't resist climbing that huge tree in the backyard. It was there, just beckoning for me to come and climb it, so of course I did! I had nearly reached the top when – Oh, sorry, I'm rambling.
Anyway, I bet the question in your mind is "Who's the lucky guy" right? Well, of course it was someone hot! Do you think I, the lovely, beautiful, multi-talented ninja, would choose someone old and ugly? Uh-uh, not happening, no way. Speaking of hot, there's the target of my affections walking right this way…
You can't miss that hair anywhere! Blonde, spiky and oh-so-sexy. I wonder how it'll feel if I ran my hands through it. Of course, I might not even be able to do that, seeing how much hair gel he uses. You cannot believe how vain this guy is! He preens in front of the mirror all day and hogs the bathroom for hours in the morning. Sometimes we even have to -
Right, rambling again. Can't help it, you know? It's a habit. Ah, there he goes flicking that hair out of his eyes. I have a thing for blondies, so sue me.
…What's that? You don't believe me? Oh, fine, fiiiine. So I like brunettes as well. And redheads. And green, purple, orange, you name it. So you got me there. But this time it's for real! Really. I've never felt that way about anyone before…
Now, don't you DARE say "I've heard that before" in THAT tone, buster! I'm serious, really. I know everyone thinks I'm just that immature little ninja whose only goal in life is to steal materia but that's not true! Not completely true anyway. Every girl wants to fall in love, and I'm no different. I really think that I see the one in Mr. Blonde Hottie over here, and yes, it's more than just physical attraction. Sure, I've had crushes. Many, in fact (Including Vampy over there, but he was really too gloomy for me), but this time it just feels… Different. I can't explain it, really.
Oh! I haven't told you his name? Isn't it obvious enough already? Who else but Cloud Strife would have such a hair style?
Don't give me that look. Yes, he's 21 years old. But it's only 5 years difference, and besides, love has no boundaries, right? Right. Besides, I don't only like him for his looks. I'm not THAT shallow! I know, I know, I haven't known him for very long, and I haven't really had the opportunity to talk with him properly, but there's just something about him. Something very appealing that attracts me to him. I saw the way he acted when Aeris was around and he could actually be a really sweet guy! And, he was actually nice to me when I was feeling sick on the Highwind, unlike some people. (A certain coffin dude, for example) I think that's when I started liking him, and now…
I'm completely, head over heels in love with him!
"Hey, Yuffie! Are you okay? You've been sitting there for quite a while now," Tifa laughed as she shook me out of my thoughts. Tifa Lockhart – beautiful, tall, strong. She was everything you could possibly want in a girl. Jealous? Me? Hah!
…Fine, I am jealous. A little. Don't rub it in.
It's not fair that a woman could be so beautiful on the outside and the inside as well. I can't even compare with her. (But that doesn't mean I'm not pretty, because I am!) Anyway, Tifa here was Cloud's childhood friend, and also happens to have more than a little crush on Cloud. One could even call it love. And you know, she's a really nice person… And even I would feel bad if I stole him from under her nose… Unless…
"AHA!" I shouted, jumping up and pumping my fist in the air. I had a plan! A plan that would get Cloud to fall in love with me, and make Tifa (and a certain other male) very happy as well. I just hope it'll work. No, it will work! Since when did one of Yuffie Kisaragi's super duper plans not work? Hah, Yuffie you're a genius for sure. I beamed happily.
"Yuffie… Are you feeling alright…?" Tifa looked at me, obvious worry on her face. Oh right, I forgot she was there. I gave her a huge grin and nodded my head.
"Yup! I'm feeling perfectly fine! Just had a sudden thought just now, sorry if I scared you!" I rubbed my head sheepishly and settled myself on the couch once again.
Tifa laughed a little and smiled, satisfied with my answer. "Well, I'll just leave you to yourself, alright? I've got tons of things to do before the others come." I nodded and she went off to do whatever she was doing. I suppose you might be wondering why I'm here with Tifa and Cloud (who was currently doing something in the next room) and what was going on.
It's been a few months since we defeated that Sephiroth guy and, oh! Did I mention what nice hair that guy had? Yeah, so he was a total maniac (his mother is just a head, creepy) and he tried to kill us all more than once, but man, you should see that hair! Soft and silky… Hey! I never got to ask him what shampoo he used… Not like he'd answer anyway. He'd probably say something like "Die!" and then stab me with his 4 foot long sword or something. Can you imagine? What a way to die! I can totally imagine my tombstone now – 'Here lies Yuffie Kisaragi, stabbed to death while asking Sephiroth advice on hair care'. Always knew I'd die in an interesting way. People would probably come to my grave and laugh instead of mourning away. 'Yuffie always was the joker!' they'd say. 'Always good for a laugh!'
Whoops, guess I started rambling again. I really have to try to end this silly habit of mine. As I was saying, it had been a few months after we defeated him, and everything was more-or-less back to normal. The only difference was that Tifa had moved back to Nibelheim, and had set up her "Seventh Heaven" bar there after Midgar was destroyed. Why she would move back to the place which held all those awful memories, I have absolutely no idea! She seemed pretty happy anyway. Cloud, Barret and Marlene lived somewhere nearby as well, as did Vincent (who still insisted in living in that musty old mansion). Cid went back to Rocket Town, Nanaki to Cosmo Canyon, Cait Sith went back to Reeve, wherever he was, and me? Well, I went back to Wutai, but I got bored and when Tifa called me to come over, I thought – Why not! I have nothing to do over there anyway and Cloud was here! What further incentive did I need?
You see, Tifa had this wonderful idea of getting us all back together for a little reunion. Not much, just a small get-together again. Just as long as everyone (minus Aeris, because you know, Aeris was gone. Didn't really talk to her anyway, but she seemed nice.) was here, together again. That was all that mattered to her anyway. Since I had nothing to do in Wutai (damn, it's boring over there) I decided to come a day early to, you know, help out.
And here I was, sitting on her couch and thinking about Cloud and other random things. Big help, huh. And you know something amazing? Tifa actually managed to convince Vincent to come. Yup, Mr Antisocial himself! It was because of that fact, plus my love for Cloud that enabled me to come up with that oh-so-awesome plan of mine! Listen up, because you're only gonna hear it once!
Ahem.
Yuffie Kisaragi's absolutely fabulous plan to get Cloud Strife to fall in love with her
1. Get Tifa to forget Cloud
2. Get Vincent to fall in love with Tifa, and vice versa
3. Confess my love to Cloud
4. Get Cloud to fall in love with me
OF course that's not it! What do you think I am, an idiot?
…Okay, forget I even asked that question. It was rhetorical, sheesh. Like I was saying, that's not ALL there is to my plan. I know it's not that simple. Getting Tifa to forget Cloud is like… Is like… Um… Is like really hard, okay! Don't give me that look! So I can't think of a word, so what? It's not like YOU haven't, huh. Geez. Give me a break, I'm only 16!
Anyway, what I was trying to say was. Getting Tifa to forget Cloud just like that was definitely not going to be easy. But when Yuffie Kisaragi is faced with a challenge, Yuffie Kisaragi deals with that challenge! She will not give up hope! Now, getting Vincent to fall for Tifa. THAT was a greater challenge. He was still (kinda) moping about his dar-ling Lucrecia, gosh. Well, sorry for not being sympathetic, but seriously. It's been freaking 30 years already! Give it up, man! Back to the point. What gave me this idea of pairing Tifa with Vinnie? Well, it was kind of obvious right? I don't know that many guys (don't you dare tease) and those that I do know are kind of… Old… I don't think Tifa wants to marry a crabby old Wutain elder, right? Some of them are just downright creepy! Like old man Tachikawa down the street. I don't even want to think about the two of them together. Tifa's nice, but not that nice.
I scanned through all the possibilities. Some were either too young, but others were just too old! Out of all the guys I knew (sort of), I came down to about 9 candidates – Barret, Cid, Vinnie, Reno, Rude, Tseng, Shinji, Akira and Seiichi. The last three were friends from Wutai, and unless Tifa went to Wutai by chance or I brought them here, they couldn't really meet. And there wasn't time to make all those arrangements! As for Reno, Rude and Tseng… Well, I didn't really know where they were, and they were enemies, to say the least. Hello? They tried to kill us more than a "couple" of times. I suppose they're out as well. Which left us with the guys in AVALANCHE. Ooh, I forgot Cait Sith! But he's not human. Reeve? Hmmm… Well, if Vinnie doesn't work!
You ask me why not Barret? Well… They're good friends, but that's it, right? He's, like, what? 50? And Cid's got Shera, although he doesn't admit it, there's gotta be something! Hehe, maybe I ought to do something about it… Yuffie's Matchmaking Service! I could set up a shop. Dad would be so proud. Yuffie Kisaragi – Matchmaker extraordinaire. I can see it now… I'll be rich! Famous! And I'll be able to get any guy I want, even Cloud!
Fine, fine, back to what I was saying. Stop being such a nag! You sound like my MOM or something. What – a girl can't dream? Okay, okaay, I get the point! So since I cancelled everyone else out, the only option left was Vincent, right? The more I thought about it the more I thought he was perfect for her! He was Mr TDH (Tall, dark and handsome, duh!), gentlemanly, silent (make that VERY silent) but deadly. Oooh, sexy. Nah, but he's not my type. He's way too blah. Cloud is the perfect one for me! Besides, I've seen them talk before. You can tell that he does like her to a certain extent. At least, more than he likes me. I tell you, that man hates me or something! He has that… That… Irritating disapproving glance (or glare, more like!) when he looks at me. Like I'm dumb or something. Hnh. But he never does that around Tifa. In fact, if I recall correctly, he distinctly said that he was glad she was alright.
Hah! And if THAT doesn't prove anything…
As for Tifa, she always treated Vincent like just another one in the group (although a lot of us thought he was scary. Hey, wouldn't you be a little frightened?) and she would talk to him sometimes when no one else did. Heh, all the evidence. This will be way easier than I thought!
Now all I need, is an accomplice. You weren't expecting me to do it all by myself, were you? And I've got just the perfect person in mind.
Well, how was it? Too dumb? Too stupid? Or did you actually like it? Comments and constructive criticism will be appreciated!
It was kind of hard to be writing in Yuffie's POV, as I'm not THAT big a Yuffie fan. Alright, I'll admit it, I don't even like Yuffie all that much. Sorry if she's out of character or anything. Tips would be great.
