AN – Written because several people asked for Rodney's decision. I know it may not be what people think Rodney would do but this seemed like the natural conclusion. Even though if I'm not sure I completely agree with it myself.
Rating – PG
Summary – John goes to Rodney with the choice and Rodney makes a decision. Sequel to 'Invulnerable' and 'Vulnerable'
Disclaimer – I don't own them, their creators do
InvincibleRodney was staring at him, blue eyes just as incredulous at they'd ever been. "You have got to be kidding me."
John watched him, a tad sheepishly as Rodney shook his head to clear it.
"Are you seriously trying to tell me that we're at war? That that's the thing everyone but me knew. We're at war with life sucking aliens in another galaxy?"
John winced at the reminder of how they'd kept Rodney in the dark but nodded. All of the scientist's earlier cheer had evaporated, he looked completely serious.
"And one of these aliens… fed on me and because of my genes I lost my memory?"
"That's about it."
"Well…" Rodney looked stunned. "That explains a few things I guess."
John gave him a rueful smile.
"What would I do? The other me I mean."
"You're still you, you know."
"I know, but what would I have done?"
John chuckled. "Probably have made a PowerPoint Presentation on your laptop and then a lot of spider diagrams."
Rodney smiled too and then he stopped. "People." He wet his lips and started again. "People are surprised when I smile. I wasn't a very happy person, was I?"
It wasn't really a question but John couldn't find a way to argue with him anyway. His mouth opened and closed, shoulders sagging.
Rodney nodded seriously. "I see… How many years did I lose?"
It was the question John had expected immediately. It would definitely have been the first thing he asked, after all. Coming now it took him by surprise and he spluttered for a minute before he managed to answer.
"That depends." His brow creased as he tried to remember what Carson had said. Why had he refused the physician's help in breaking the news to Rodney again? "You've aged about twenty years but there's no telling how the stress on your body because of the feeding compares to whatever strains would have been placed on it over those twenty years so…" John trailed off, Rodney wasn't listening.
In fact, he didn't seem to have heard anything beyond 'twenty years'.
The physicist stared at him and mouthed the words, before clearing his throat. "Twenty years? I can't go back to Earth then." He didn't look particularly sad.
Nevertheless John winced. "Not to see anyone who knew you, no."
Rodney was shaking his head though and John felt like he'd missed something. "But I don't know anyone who knew me, John. I don't remember them, I don't remember Earth. I like Atlantis, it's the only place I've ever lived. I don't want to be sent to Earth."
The abrupt turn around had surprised him and it took a second to catch up. "You're not going to be sent to Earth, Rodney."
The total faith with which Rodney seemed to accept his words was a little humbling.
"You know, you don't have to decide now," he offered tentatively.
Rodney shook his head fiercely. "No, I decide today. If I put it off I'll never do it."
John couldn't help the smile. "Now that sounds like Rodney."
Rodney snorted lightly. "In this war of yours… Do you need the old me back?"
For a second John was tempted to lie. So tempted to tell the physicist 'yes' they needed him. That the Atlantis expedition was doomed without him. Then it was gone, he couldn't do that and he knew it.
"No, I don't think you've changed as much as you think you have."
Rodney was eyeing him seriously. "I think you're overestimating the old me. I think he'd be quite bitter about this."
John blinked at him, he felt like he should defend Rodney… even against, well, Rodney. "What makes you say that?" He asked as he desperately scrabbled for an argument. Rodney didn't say anything but his eyes flickered to a spot where John knew a camera resided, he laughed. "You definitely haven't changed as much as you think you have."
Rodney was still watching him. "How many people get a new start, John? I'm not even angry, I've never known any different. I like the people I work with and I like who I am. I don't think the old me could say the same."
John gave a sad smile. "Do you miss us?"
Rodney's expression was full of understanding. "You're still here, John. But sometimes I miss the things we've gone through because they obviously made us so close…" He paused. "Do you miss me?"
"You haven't gone anywhere either, Rodney."
Rodney's smile grew. "Thanks, John, and who knows, maybe one day you'll like this me as much as you liked the old me."
John clapped him on the shoulder. "So I can tell Elizabeth then?"
"Yeah. Tell her now."
"She'll want you to change your mind."
Rodney shrugged. "Fair enough. I don't think I will though."
John tilted his head. "You know, you're a lot more relaxed now but I don't completely buy it. You are allowed to be sarcastic and shout you know. Even if people aren't doing something stupid."
Rodney's expression was delighted. "I am?"
"Yeah." John grinned. "Just don't be too harsh, okay?"
"I promise," Rodney swore, his eyes glittering.
John shook his head. "You still coming over tonight so we can run through the new defence systems?"
"Yeah, of course. You want me to bring anything?"
John hesitated. He hadn't worked out how yet but somehow since his… 'Encounter' with the Wraith Rodney had been able to get his hands on all sorts of black-market goods most of the expedition didn't even know were on offer.
"Galaxy chocolate and Canadian beer?" he asked hopefully (Rodney had gotten him hooked on the stuff).
"Sure!" Rodney grinned. "Any preference as to brand?"
"Nah, anything really."
Rodney nodded and turned to leave, John caught his arm. "Rodney."
"Yeah?"
"I never stopped liking you."
Rodney didn't answer, he just beamed and John smiled back. It was slightly false but Rodney was out of the door before he could notice.
John let the smile drop. As much as he hated to admit it, Elizabeth had been right. This decision left Rodney completely vulnerable.
John set his jaw, there was no way John would let anything happen to him, by the time he was done Rodney would be invincible…
Even if that meant protecting Rodney from himself.
Because this Rodney seemed a lot more emotionally open and John knew from experience that that meant emotionally vulnerable.
He hadn't been lying, he did like this Rodney. Ironically he'd learned more about Rodney since his memory loss than he had in all the time he'd known him.
But Rodney wasn't Rodney without the sarcasm and the snark.
And, even when Rodney was standing right next to him, he found that sometimes he just missed his friend.
