Chapter One: The Piece of Paper

Meredith Grey was walking home from school. At the age of eight years old, Meredith had done so for two years now.

Meredith was holding on to her bag with both hands. A long piece of paper was coming out of it. It was too long to fit into the bag without folding it and this piece of paper was too important to her to be folded. If she had putted her school bag on her back the piece of paper might have been damaged by the wind or she might have lost it and it was too precious for that too.

You see that piece of paper was Meredith Grey report card and one she would be proud to show her mother because for the first time Meredith was sure not to disappoint her. She had had many B and her worse mark was a C.

She had already though of the way she would present it to her mother. Since her mother would probably get home very late from surgery she would put it on the kitchen table. She would wait on the stairs cage for her reaction and when she would see her mother smile in pride she would come down the stairs to meet her. That's what she would do.

When she got home her new nanny, Fanny she believed, had prepared her a snack of toast with jam, an apple and some milk. Fanny believed that a fruit was the only sugar a child should eat, but Meredith wasn't worried. She had already made some provision of cookies that she had hidden in the box containing all the foods for her dolls tea party her grand mother had offered her. Let just say, she never used it.

Ellie Grey never kept a nanny for her daughter longer than a month. Being a very busy woman she never had time for the help and she left the entire care of her daughter education and household duties to them, but was never satisfied by any. None could ever calm Meredith down or stop her from doing whatever she fancied doing at the time.

Even as an only child Meredith always seemed to make as much noises as three and her mother could never work in peace or rest. She always plotted some mischief and all her nannies had been powerless to her.

If Meredith decided to use a real steak from the fridge to operate on her dolls and if the operation went badly and they found some grape jus all over her mother perfect white rug no one could stop her.

But that day, Meredith had decided to be as good as an angel. Fanny was rather surprised to see her eat all her very healthy meal without a protest.

Afterward, the little girl started on her homework without being told and without kicking or screaming. Her nanny was stunned, but did not say a word in case the child would realize what she was doing.

"Nanny Fanny, I'm going upstairs, okay?"

"Sure, Miss Grey. Just make sure to stay tidy until Mrs. Grey gets home," Fanny was even more taken aback for Miss Grey had never asked her permission to do anything before.

Meredith wanted more than to just look tidy she wanted to be perfect when her mother saw her. She locked the bathroom door behind her and started to make herself a bath.

She soaped herself everywhere and washed her hair with extra care. When she was finished, the bathroom floor was covered in water, but she was cleaner than she ever been before.

She dressed back into her cloth and started drawing a portrait of her and her mother before their house until Fanny called her for supper.

"What happen to you? Why is your hair all wet?" Fanny asked looking at her expecting to discover some trick on the part of her young mistress.

"I took a bath."

"This early! All by yourself?" Her nanny no matter how new knew that Meredith had to be force into cleaning herself. Everyday it was a new battle so it was rather surprising to see her do it in her own free will.

"Yes, so what?"

"Nothing, Miss. Here's your supper."

The little girl was not at all salivating before the sight of vegetables and meat pie that Fanny presented her , but she ate her whole plate without a word. This only made Fanny more suspicious that some big prank was coming her way, but nothing did and she had been eyeing the little girl for too long for her to have hid her vegetables down her skirt like the day before.

After the meal, Meredith went directly to watch TV, but after she saw that her nanny was very much occupy with the laundry, she went up to get her school bag and putted her record card on the center of the table.

Not long afterward she went to bed. She waited there patiently for the sound of the main door being open. When it finally did, she tip toed to the stairs cage and watch as Ellie Grey started heating the left over Fanny had left her.

When her mother finally saw Meredith's report card lying in the middle of the table, Meredith smile in anticipation and started biting on her lower lips. Mrs. Grey putted her glasses on to read it. She finally putted it down and started eating. Surprised by this reaction the little girl walked down the stairs, her stomach feeling torn by the fear and the excitement of knowing what her mother though of her work.

Without announcing herself, she sat down in front of her mother. The woman looked up to see her there, seeming irritated by her presence, but not surprised.

"Meredith, why aren't you in bed?"

Meredith didn't know what to say. She didn't want to seem like she was waiting for a compliment on her work, some sign that her mother was proud of her and yet she was. Even children have their pride.

"I just…" the little girl trailed off. She had not prepared an excuse. She didn't think she would need any.

"You should go to bed," was all her mother said before returning her attention to her meal.

This may have sounded unimportant, futile even, but to the small child that was Meredith this wounded her more than you can think. This was indifference or rejection on her mother part. She didn't know which. She only knew that that wasn't what mothers were suppose to say. Mothers picked you up and kissed you or at least gave you a path on the head and told you something like "Good job!"

But Meredith did not say a word; she only stood up and left for the security of her room. There, in her bed, she cried.

She didn't see her mother the next morning and the next afternoon she learned that Fanny had been fired for letting her wonder into the house when it was past ten.

Meredith learned something very important that night, something that would follow her years later. At sixteen, she would rebel against that lesson and sleep with a twenty-two years old man in the back of his car and at eighteen she would try to forget about it through countless parties and bars, but in the end like her mother she would accept it, and even though Ellie Grey never believed it, that's what gave her daughter the strength and determination to go through med school and one day follow her foot step.

That's also what would hurt her self esteem when the Dr. Shepard chose his wife over her.

Nothing, but perfection was acceptable. You should never stand for second best.