Demi: Another parody… - grins sheepishly- couldn't resist, sorry…
Title: Oh, For Heaven's Sake, Kai!
Summary: Just a parody on all those 'Kai turns into a chibi and Tala has to look after him and let's insert a huge gasp' stories Kai/Tal (sequel of 'I Really Wish…')
Rating: T (for swearing and implied sex)
Prenotes: Please not that this is parody. It is not meant to insult anyone (well…). I understand that many good writers use this storyline and some can pull it off… it's just… bloody hell, it's so overused! But please take this short… thing lightly.
Um… enjoy the pointless-ness and please no flaming? Yes, I think that just covers it.
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"He forgot? Wow… Tala, you must have been a crap fuck."
Tala glared at the Falcon. "Fuck you."
"No thanks." Bryan drawled.
"But yes, he forgot." Tala continued, crossing his legs and leaning back in the living room armchair. "It's that stupid memory problem he has that happens all the time…"
"… Are you sure it's not just you being a crap fuck?"
The Wolf smacked him around the head. "If I didn't know better, I'd thought you are suggesting we try it out."
"Are you offering?"
"Tala!"
The said Russia turned to Ian, who had jut run into the room. "Yes?"
"You'll never believe this, but…" The midget pulled out something from behind his back – a miniature Kai, complete with huge ruby eyes and short limbs. "Something happened to Kai…"
Tala and Bryan blinked at the mini-Kai.
"Ehm… you can say that again…"
"Kai?" A shocked Tala stood up. "How the hell did this happen?"
"Well…" Kai began. "There was this old hag who wanted to give me a blessing, but I told her to sod off-"
"Well, his memory's back…" Bryan muttered.
"You told her to sod off." Tala repeated with a raised eyebrow.
"Yeah. And then she went berserk and cursed me. Now I'm stuck like this!"
"Well that was stupid…" The Falcon commented. "Do you know how many times that happens to people? That old hag should be in prison!"
"Oh shut up, Bryan." Tala snapped. He looked back at Kai. "How do we turn you back?"
"Well," Bryan cut in, pulling a book out of nowhere, "in 'The Manual Of Life With Weirdos', it states that when – not if - your boyfriend is turned into a chibi or miniature retard by the official Old 'Try And Put Me In Prison You Bastard' Hag, you have to look after it, put up with pranks and also, not have sex until he's turned back."
Everyone stood still for a few moments…
"Fuck it – Kai, you're on your own. Come on Bryan - let's test your theory on whether I'm just a bad fuck."
Kai gawped as Tala dragged a very pleased Bryan off into the bedroom. When the bedroom door slammed shut and a loud moan echoed through, Kai frowned and crossed his arms. "My life is just one big cliché, isn't it?"
"Hah, imagine if fangirls were in control of your life!"
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Demi: -groans- Gawd, sorry! It just got stuck in my head! -winces-
Please review and no flames.
