Disclamer: i own nothing...duh!

sorry it took so long but i kept forgetting i had it :D


Once they were back in the waiting room Rory began to calm down. Luke was still holding her tightly as if to protect her or distract her from any more pain. It was now very late and a lot of the people that were in the waiting room when they had first arrived had now gone and the hospital seemed deserted. It was a realization that Luke didn't like. He looked down and kissed the top of Rory's head. He didn't really like crying women; in fact he went out of his way to avoid it. But this was Rory and he couldn't walk away from her. She began to pull away and he loosened his grip on her and looked her in the eyes. It looked as though all of the pain and suffering in the world were present in her eyes and it made him want to kill the bastard that had caused it. He hared her mutter something along the lines of getting some air and finding some coffee. He nodded slowly and let his thoughts drift to the things that he had just heard.

How could Christopher do that to Lorelai? How could anyone do that? He hardly had a chance to think about all of things that were said before the two elder Gilmore's came out of Lorelai's room. They both had similar expressions and even though he had only met them a few times he thought he had never seen them look so small. Emily began to walk over to him and he looked at her and offered a small smile of acknowledgement before she spoke.

"Do you know where Rory is?" her voice seemed to ring in the empty waiting room.

"Um…she said she needed some air and went outside." Emily responded with a slight nod and went to sit next to her husband. As if on cue Rory entered the room. She had stopped crying and looked as thought she had begun to make sense of the night's events.

"Is it ok if I see my mom?" the question wasn't really aimed at anyone but she had left the room before the doctor so she wasn't sure if it was ok or not.

"The doctor said she needed to sleep and the pain medication they gave her would make her tired so she was going to sleep but I guess you could sit with her." She didn't know who had answered her. Everything was still a bit blurry and all she could think about was seeing her mom. Without giving any kind of response to the statement she began to walk down the corridor to her mother's room.

This time she didn't hesitate to open the door. She knew what was waiting for her on the other side and she needed to focus on what she was going to say before she broke down again. Pushing the door open she silently slipped inside the room. The small light that was on over the bed had been turned off but she could still see her mothers shape under the covers.

Still unsure if her mom had heard her enter the room she walked silently aver to the side of the bed. Looking down at her mother she realized she had never seen her look so vulnerable. Trying her best not to wake her she walked over to the corner of the room and picked up the chair her grandfather had been sitting in and moved it to her mother's bed side.

Falling asleep didn't seem to be much of a problem the pain was now a dull throbbing in her head. Someone had once told her that dreams are your subconscious trying to work through the problems you have when you're awake. Most of the dreams she remembered were all silly, like wanting to marry an oompa lumpa, or being eaten by a turtle. But these dreams weren't like that. She could only wish she would forget when she woke up.

He was there, she couldn't see him but she knew he was there. Somewhere in the room watching her to see what she would do. Like her reaction was just some game to him. Her eyes were focused on the door in front of her. She knew she needed get to the door, but she knew she wasn't going to. A hand appeared from behind her and grabbed her arm. It was as though his hands had left his finger prints all over her. She closed her eyes in anticipation for what was going to happen next. Her arm was slammed against the wall and pain shot through her making her cry out in shock more than pain. Something struck her hard and her mouth was flooded with what she could only guess was blood. She tried to scream but nothing came out, it could have been due to the shock and fear she was feeling but it was probably the fact his hand was around her neck holding her flush against the wall. She couldn't breath; the blood that was still in her mouth was chocking her. She felt her body growing weak and the room started to go black. The dark would have been a welcome sensation to the pain she was feeling, thinking she was going to get some kind of release. Just as she felt her muscles relax he let go and hit her again. The sensation was too much. She inhaled sharply, sending the blood that had collected in her mouth down her throat making her choke. She was a heap on the floor, unable to move, not wanting to believe that this was happening to her. Before she could think about getting herself up he was on her again, picking her up like a rag doll and throwing her through the air. The darkness came rushing back again, drowning her.

Opening her eyes she could only see darkness. She could feel tears on her face, she was crying in her dream. As quickly as she could she wiped them away from her face. With still blurry vision she looked to her right seeing that she wasn't alone in the room. Rory was sitting in a chair next to her bed looking at her mother through fearful eyes.

"Hey Hun, you ok?" she knew it was one of the stupidest things she could have asked but she needed the awkward silence that hung in the air to go away.

"I guess, I wanted to ask you something" she knew it wouldn't be long until the would be journalist in her daughter came out.

"I know when I found you…" there was a long pause as though she was trying to forget what state she had found her mother in "you were um pretty out of it but you told me you were sorry and…um…I just wanted to ask you….why? I meant you have nothing to be sorry for this isn't your fault and its been driving me crazy trying to understand everything that's happened and well this is one of the most confusing…" before she could continue to explain her self her mother softly began to talk.

"Rory…" she looked at her daughter. Rory slowly tilted her head so she was looking at her mother; she had shifted her eyes so she was looking down not wanting her mom to see she had been crying. "I don't know how to explain it to you so I'm gonna try and explain it to you so….don't say anything till I finish…ok?" she waited for her daughter to respond and when she didn't she took it as a sign that she understood. "You're my best friend but your also my daughter and it is my responsibility to try and protect you from the big bad world…I know that's silly but to me you will always be my little girl." She carried on with her explanation before Rory could protest to anything. "When this happened I wanted more than anything to protect you from it. I didn't know how to tell you with out lying to you. I was sorry because I let you down and I was sorry that I had to tell you who did this to me. Christopher…." Taking a beep breath to steady her nervous and it took all the strength she had not to cry. "Will always be your dad if we like it or not and I have always tried to make sure that you see him or at least talk to him because I didn't want you to grow up with out him in your life. You don't know how easy it would have been for my to lie and tell you and say I didn't know who it was that did this, how much pain I could have saved you and I only wish I could have done that. But instead I decided to tell the truth…and I wish I could take it back….so I'm just…I'm sorry." She was still looking at Rory and she hadn't realized it but she had started to cry, she hated to see her daughter cry it made her guilt seem that much more unbearable.

Rory couldn't believe what her mother was saying to her, she never wanted to see her dad again and it sounded like she wanted her to still have some kind of relationship with him. "Are you saying you still want me to see him?" she was standing by her bed now and was almost shouting at her mom. "I never want to see that bastard again and your trying to blame this on you, why should you take the blame for something he's done? You didn't ask for this and I never asked you to protect me from what happened. Would you really want me to still see him if you hadn't said anything? Could you stand it if I was alone with him? What if he did this to me as well?" she was defiantly shouting at her mother now and her sorrow and pain had now turned to anger. "You have nothing to be sorry for do you hear me?" she said louder than she intended it to be, her mother turned her head away from her daughter and looked at the wall that was next to her bed. "Hey…."she said even louder still. "I said did you hear me?" she had put her hand on her mothers shoulder forcing her to look her in the eye. She hardly heard her mother's response it was barely above a whisper. A voice that reminded her how she had found her mother earlier that night.

"Yes…I heard you" she had tried to be strong but she found her self crying again but this time she didn't want to stop. If felt good to hear someone tell her it wasn't her fault, to hear that she didn't have to be strong, to protect anyone.

Seeing her mom cry again was more than enough to calm her down and she wanted to tell her mom she was going to be there for her and she wasn't going to let anyone hurt her again. But instead she sat on her mom's bed and climbed up so she was lying with her against the wall. Holding her close it wasn't long before both of them fell asleep. With Rory's presence she felt a soothing calm come over her and she let her guard down for the first time that night.