Regret. It's only natural to regret things we've done, choices we've made, and things we've said. We feel a great need to go back in time and change what happened. But what's the point? We know we can't. It's been proven time and time again. So why do we still feel the need? I'll admit, I've felt regret. I regret not telling Tolle I loved him before he went out on that ship, I regret getting involved in the war, I regret saying those things to him, I regret doing those things to him just as much as I'm sure he regrets saying those things to me. But why? I've tried time and time again to give up regret and accept that what happened, happened. But I can't. I can shove it into that closet in the back of my mind, keep it locked away, but the feeling is still there, nagging me, eating away at me, letting me know that it's not going away and then begging to be released, so I let it go, hopping it will go away, but it gets worse so I lock it away again. It's a vicious never-ending circle. And then I wonder if I should accept my regret and move on, like they tell me I should accept Tolle's death and move on. But it's not that simple. I don't know how to accept it. It's like I'm fighting a battle with myself each day, but don't know whose fighting or for what. It's just there. A war within a war. Maybe I won't be able to move on until the war is over to find out. But no matter what it takes, I will.
A/N I feel like all my fics are getting the same. I'll try to make the next one insanely different. Maybe I'll finally finish the sequel to 'Meet the Parents'. Meh. If any of you have any prompt ideas, let me know.
