The next morning, November 16, Leo got up gently at six, so that he wouldn't wake Raphael and went to the kitchen to prepare breakfast for him. He wasn't much of a cook, but he'd do his best, like he'd done the previous evening.

Leo made scrambled eggs, bread and coffee, avoiding the toaster, which he loathed and which he was banned from using, because it always seemed to blow up when he used it and he was convinced it was possessed. He set it all on a tray and returned to the bedroom, hoping his mate liked what he'd made.

XXXX

Raphael was asleep and an image of Shredder sneering, as he loomed over him and mercilessly brutalized him flashed in his mind. Blood trickled out of his abused hole and down his legs, as every part of him hurt. No. Not again. The first time had been traumatizing enough.

"I'm going to hurt you so bad," Shredder said. "But you'll love it and being my bitch, Raphael. That's your true place. You know that. You're just a weak, spineless creature, aren't you? There's a good pet. Lie there and let a real man show you who's boss. I'm your Alpha, you freak. Good boy. Such a good pet and slut."
Don't hurt me," Raphael pleaded. "Please I beg of ya. I'll do whatever ya want. Please stop. I don't want this," he said, as tears rained down his cheeks. "Yer hurtin' me. Stop!"
"Going to fuck you good, Raphael. Enjoy!" Shredder said and grinned sadistically.

Raphael screamed.

Leo heard the shrieks, ran into the bedroom, placed the tray on a dresser and strode to the bed.

"Raph!" Leo said, wrapping his arms around his trembling and sobbing mate. "Raph, it's me, Leo. Baby, wake up. You're okay. I'm here, Raphie. Open your eyes and look at me."
Raphael opened his eyes and said, "Leo, is that really ya?"
"Yes, yes, my love," Leo said, stroking his face with one and keeping the other wrapped around him. "It's me. I'm here and you're safe, okay? No one's going to touch you. I won't allow them. "
"He was hurtin' me, Leo," Raphael choked out. "There was blood and…" Raphael hiccupped. "Every parta me hurt. It was like it was happenin' all over again. I was cryin' and beggin' for him ta stop and he just laughed and called me his pet and bitch."
"It was a nightmare, sweetheart. You're safe in the lair. Look around, hon. You're in our room. Go on. Look around. I have you and I'm not going to let you go. You're no one's bitch or pet. You're Raphael, my heroic and tough mate, whom I adore so much. Don't listen to that bullshit. You're not worthless or a freak or whatever else he called you. You're magnificent and everything pure, Raphie."
Raphael glanced around and said, "It's true. I'm at home, but it felt so real, Leo."
"I know, sweetheart. Donnie said it's PTSD, which you'll probably have for a long time, but we'll get through it together. I swear. You're strong, Raph. We'll get through it and you'll be even stronger than before."
Raphael hugged him tightly, more tears streaming down his cheeks, and said, "I ain't strong, Leo. That bastard broke me and he knows it. I'm only strong 'cause of ya and it's ya and yer love that's keepin' me goin'. If I didn't have that, I don't know what I'd do. Don't leave. I couldn't stand it. I need ya."
Leo kissed his cheek and said, "I'm not going anywhere. I'm yours and I won't let anyone hurt you. Not now. Not ever. They'd have to get past me first. I love you so much, Raphie."
"I love ya too, Leo. Thank ya for bein' here. I don't know what I'd do without ya."
"You'll never have to find out. I'm not going to leave you, okay?"

Raphael sniffed and nodded, his beak nuzzled into the crook of Leo's neck, the leader's musk that was tinged with sandalwood comforting him.

I'm so lucky ta have his love, Raphael thought, as he inhaled Leo's scent. That's the one good thing I've got. Him. I hope I never lose him, because I don't know what I'd do without him. He's my rock, my anchor, my oasis, my everythin'.

Leo pulled away, kissed Raphael's tears away and said, "My love, do you think you can eat anything? I made breakfast, but it's cold now."
"I ain't hungry. Sorry. I just wanna snuggle. I'm sorry ya went ta all that trouble and it's ruined."
"You have nothing to apologize for, Raphie. We'll lie here and cuddle and when you're ready, we'll have breakfast. How does that sound?"
"All right," Raphael sniffed.
"Good. Lie down."

They lay down, arms wrapped around one another, Raphael's beak buried in the crook of Leo's neck, his body pressed as close as he could against Leo.

Leo soon heard Raphael snore, but he couldn't sleep, his mind plagued with his conflicted feelings. I have to talk to Dad about them, he thought. As for Raph, the poor guy's been through hell all and back and he's clinging to me like a lifeline. I've never seen him so broken and it pierces my heart. That fucking Shredder's going to pay big time.

Leo finally drifted off to sleep.

The leader woke up two hours later and sensing him stirring, Raphael opened his eyes and gazed at him.

"Hey," Leo said softly. "How are you feeling now, Raphie?"
"Warm, secure, loved."
"You are," Leo said and kissed his beak, making him blush. "You're so warm as well and I love your scent. I can't get enough of it. It's so manly. Just like you."
"Yeah? A real man wouldn't have let himself be fucked by his arch enemy," Raphael said bitterly. "I'm just a nothin' and a weak creature ta be despised. The Shredder was right and ya deserve better than me, Leo. I deserved what I got, didn't I? It ain't like I fought back and…."
"Raphael, stop it!" Leo said firmly. "I won't have you saying shit like that. You're not a nothing and you didn't deserve it. No one deserves to be treated that way. No one. It wasn't your fault and it doesn't mean that you aren't a real man. It just means that you were violated in one of the worst ways possible and it doesn't change or reflect who you are. You're still the same person. You've just been through hell, but you'll get through it. I know you will and you'll smile again and laugh and...Shredder's a nothing, a monster, the vilest person. Only a monster would violate someone that brutally, Raph, and you aren't one. You're wonderful, sexy, caring, gentle, my best friend, my mate and I love you with every fiber of my being. It wounds me when you talk ill about yourself and blame yourself for it. Stop it."
"I can't help it. I replay that evenin' over and over in my head, Leo, and I'm mad, because I couldn't defend myself. I always have been able, but he fuckin' paralyzed me and all I could do was lie there and take it. I'm conflicted, ya know. I know it was his fault and I did nothin' wrong, but I'm mad at myself, because it happened. Do ya understand? I'm the Alpha and macho guy, Leo. It wasn't supposed ta happen. Not ta me."
"I understand, but it did happen and it's not your fault. It could happen to anyone, okay? Shit. It could even happen to me, but it doesn't change who the person is and it doesn't change my opinion of you."
"If I had ta choose, I'd rather it have happened ta me than ya. Yer pure goodness and ya don't deserve that."
"You didn't either. I want you to stop blaming yourself and being so hard on yourself. The blame is squarely on Shredder. Not you. I want you to see yourself through my eyes and see how much you're adored and loved and to focus on that. I want you to know how special you are. I want to hear you laugh and to see you smile again, Raphie. Your smile could light up the darkest room and your laugh is the most wonderful thing in the world."
"It's gonna take time, Leo. Please understand."
"I do."
"I don't think ya do, Leo. Ya think ya can fix me over night, but ya can't. It ain't like just puttin' a band aid on a knee and yer better, okay?"
"I never thought that, Raph. I know it'll take time."
"Yeah. Rape survivors take ages ta heal. Both emotionally and physically. They do have conflicted emotions, rangin' from blame and guilt ta hate and vengeance. I'm goin' through a multitude of emotions and there's only two constant ones. Love and gratitude for ya. Yer my shinin' beacon, Leo, and I'm so thankful for ya, but it's still a long process ahead a us. I just want ya ta understand. I might never be the same Raph ya knew. I can't imagine anyone bein' the same after that kinda treatment. Do ya understand? And if I ain't the same, ya will have ta decide if ya still want me. I may never be plucky again or get my fightin' mojo back. I might remain a shadow of myself."
"I can answer that now, Raphie. I'll love you whatever you are, but you'll always be fearless to me and I'm so honored and proud you're my mate."
"Ya sure?"
"Yes," Leo said and tenderly kissed him on the lips. "I'm with you one hundred percent and I'll be there every step of the way, my darling."
Raphael's heart swelled with adoration for him and he said, "I love ya too."
"Now I have a surprise for you. Close your eyes until I tell you to open them."
"All right," Raphael said and closed his eyes.

Leo went to his dresser, took out a bag containing presents he'd bought for his mate and took the bag to the bed.

"Open your eyes, Raphie," Leo said.
Raphael did, saw the bag and said, "What's that?"
"It contains your birthday presents, my love. Look inside."

Raphael pulled out four presents beautifully wrapped in gold wrapping paper with red ribbons. He carefully opened one and his eyes widened in astonishment, when he saw two tickets for the Knicks against the Lakers.

This musta cost Leo a packet, Raphael thought. Wow. The Knicks. Leo knows they're my favorite team. I can't believe it.

"Wow," Raphael said, his green eyes shining happily. "Basketball tickets. Thank ya. Ya shouldn't have, Leo. They musta been expensive. I…."
"Worth every penny, my angel. You can take Casey if you want."
"Nope. We're goin'. Ya and me in our disguises. Thank ya so much. I've never been ta a live a game before. Wow. I'm blown away. Yer the greatest, Leo!"
"No. You are, my love. Open the others."

Raphael opened the other gifts and saw that he had a pair of new sai Leo had crafted for him and a crime fiction book. He loved the gifts, especially the new sai. It must have taken Leo months to make them and they were beautiful. He couldn't wait to test them out.

The final gift was a heart shaped box, which contained a plain silver ring.

Leo had planned on wearing the ring, which he'd asked April to have made for his wedding to Lotus, but Raphael didn't need to know that. This was his promise ring to Raphael now.

Raphael gawked at the ring and said, "What's this, Leo? Are ya proposin'?"
"No. It's a promise ring, Raphie. Like your Claddagh. I'll buy you a more extravagant ring when I do propose. Let me slip it on you," Leo said and did. "Do you like it?"
"It's beautiful," Raphael said, his eyes filling with tears. "Thank ya. I'll wear it with pride. Thank ya." He kissed Leo on the lips and added, "This has been the best birthday ever. Thank ya."
"There's more to come. I have something special planned for tonight, but I think we should go into the kitchen now. The others will be up and they'll want to celebrate your birthday with you as well."
"I can't wait, but I gotta ask. How come ya just had this ring lyin' 'bout?"
"I had this ring made in the event I got married. Call me a hopeful romantic, but it looks better on you and it brings out your gorgeous eyes."
"Ya mean ya had it made for yer weddin' with Lotus, don't ya?"
Caught out, Leo sighed and said, "Yes, but I'm not marrying her. I'm going to marry you someday, Raphie, so this ring makes sense, doesn't it?"
"No," Raphael said, pulling the ring off and throwing it on the bed. "If ya wanna give me a promise ring, Leo, ya give me one that was intended for me. Not for a union with someone else. I don't wanna sound ungrateful, but that's tacky!"

Damn Raphael and his pride, Leo thought, but he had a point. It had been a tacky thing to do and Raphael had a right to feel insulted.

"I'm sorry, Raph," Leo said. "You're right. I'll get you something only intended for you."
"I'm glad ya understand. I didn't wanna sound like an asshole, but I was insulted. Ya don't do that, Leo. That's a no in a relationship, ya know."
"I understand. Let's go to breakfast, okay?"
"All right. Hey. The Knicks game is tomorrow night. Can ya believe it, Leo? We're goin' ta a live game. Can we get popcorn and soda and maybe ice cream after the game?"
"Anything you want."
"Gosh. Yer the best. Hey. That ring ya can give ta April. She could sell it or somethin' Ya will, right? It ain't like ya got a need for it now that yer with me."
"I'll do that."
"Cool."

The lovers dressed and headed to the kitchen, hands entwined.

That was awkward, Leo thought. Fuck it. At least it didn't spoil his day. I have to find a chance to talk to Dad and I have to call Lotus.

A/N Next up is Mikey's betrayal.