The News of Nothing's Call – Third Issue

by Allexandra Radcliffe

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Hey, everyone! It's hot over here, and my school is freezing, and I got sat on when riding the bus today, and…oh, forget it. I'm just complaining to be complaining. But it's fun…

Anyway, I started (and nearly finished) writing the first chapter of that companion fic to this one that I mentioned. It's starting a little slow, but I like it. Of course, if you don't like yaoi, don't read it. Just warning you beforehand.

Also, thanks to everyone (all six of you) who have reviewed! This weekend was kinda crappy, but you guys made me happy! (No rhyme intended.) If you read this, and you like it, please review! I can't tell if you like it or if you think I'm just a crazy girl who needs to stop writing in class and pay attention…

Well, enough of my whining. As for disclaimer…I don't own KH2 or the characters. Cause if I did, well…

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THE NEWS OF NOTHING'S CALL

MAKING YOU LAUGH EVEN IF YOU DON'T HAVE A HEART

Editor-in-Chief: Demyx

Editor and Photographer: Xigbar

Field Reporter: Roxas

Special Correspondent: Axel

Agony Aunt: Larxene

More Coverage of Organization News

Thankfully, after several failed attempts to incinerate us, Axel has given up trying to kill us and agreed to keep us posted on events at Castle Oblivion. This announcement was met with surprise (from the Editor-in-Chief and Photographer) and complete apathy (from Roxas, who else?) However, we are glad that we'll know more about that really weird castle, and that we don't have to worry about dying in a blaze of hellfire anymore. Of course, that leaves Larxene…

- The Melodious Nocturne, Demyx

Revenge of the Savage Nymph, by Xigbar

Yesterday afternoon, we all heard the screams and pleas for mercy from the idiot Editor-in-Chief and the new brat. The reason, obviously, was because the idiots found out about Larxene and Marluxia's yaoi obsession and wrote about it in the paper. (They might call me a coward, but at least I wasn't being tortured by Larxene.) At the moment, both are in Demyx's room, being mothered by Axel. We'd be laughing, except that the redhead bastard is the best cook in the Organization, and we all want some food…

Redecorating Castle Oblivion, by Axel

For some reason, Xemnas gave control of Castle Oblivion to Marluxia. (Someone whose name I won't mention brought p the Xemnas-Mansex thing…) So yesterday, five of us were over there catering to the Graceful Assassin's every whim. And those whims included redecorating the castle with white marble flowers.

The place was already bad enough with all the white and the memory rooms, but now it's even worse! Luckily, some of the statues break easily, so Lexaeus and I had some fun before Marluxia caught us.

Well, Demyx has just woken up and is bugging me for food, so…this has been a special report by your special correspondent, Axel. Got it memorized?

Letters for Larxene

Dear Larxene,

Someone in the Organization implied that I like someone else in the Organization. Apparently, the other person believes this is true and has begun chasing me around. What should I do?

- Renivi Danul

Dear Renivi Danul,

I know that's you, Saïx, and you know you and Mansex are made for each other! So go on and snog him. And when you do, tell me before so I can come take some pictures!

Letters From the Organization

Seeing as Demyx is currently incapacitated, I, the Flurry of Dancing Flames, will be answering the letters today!

Dear Demyx,

If you insist on playing every night, at least finish the song! You've been playing the same little bit over and over for the past month, and it's gotten old. At least play something softer.

- Zexion

Dear Zexion,

Demyx would like me to tell you that if you don't want to hear him, buy some earplugs! And you need to stop laughing evilly in the middle of the night, anyway.

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Okay, I know that was random and very short…sorry. Saïx's alibi should be easy to figure out, since it took me about three seconds to think of. Hopefully, I'll post the first chapter of the other thing sometime later today or tomorrow, so…review, people! I'll be watching…MRAH HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

…whew, that was fun.