Chapter 5

Disclaimer: I do not own any other the characters. DC comics does. Sections of this chapter refer to the Batman Begins movie (spoilers included.)

It was now close to the 16th hour. Alfred had been fighting the fatigue along with Bruce's demons. How much longer would it be humanly possible for this old man to be mentally aware if needed? His young charge had fallen asleep after his last episode. Although Alfred finally knew the reason for Bruce's anger and rage, with much of it being aimed at him, Alfred himself could not forget his own feelings of displeasure at recalling such an event. Master Bruce's words of I hate you! Still rang in his ears and his memory more often than not. Today was like no other except the forbidden words were said out loud again. Alfred tried his best to put it past him. What good would it do to dwell upon it? Decisions were made and Alfred only wished some of them could have been made better.

An old buried memory, one which didn't find its way into Alfred's consciousness too often, was making its way back. After Master Bruce had left for college, Wayne manor had become like the mausoleum Bruce always claimed it was. Sheets covered the furniture to prevent the dust from gathering. Most of the items in the house were merely visited once a day by an old friend who was left to care for them. Alfred sorely missed Master Bruce especially since they had left each other on such ill terms. He found his heart lightening a bit knowing that Bruce would soon be here again even if it was for the hearing.

Alfred found himself smiling at that memory and the feeling it brought. Now looking down at the twisted body gasping for the air he breathed made Alfred wish more and more that the past had been very different, very different indeed as he remembered that fateful day with the hearing.

Alfred helped Master Bruce into the house with his bags. Bruce had been silent most of the car ride home. He seemed to still be holding a grudge against Alfred for the past. It didn't matter now anyway. That Bruce had faded almost as quickly as he had come. This Bruce that now stood before Alfred was a changed man, one that cared only for his own pleasures and lacked the dignity and gentleness that once illuminated him. This Bruce had been with more women than he could remember and didn't care for any of them. The feelings were almost always mutual since these women only cared for the greener part of Bruce which he never allowed them to have anyway. Bruce kept noticing Alfred eying him up and down and politely asking him if he was going to stay in Gotham or not. Bruce smiled and shook his head declaring that he was only back for the hearing and nothing more. For some reason however, Bruce doubted that Alfred believed his story and a feeling of panic rose into his chest. Alfred couldn't know about the gun. Could he?

Alfred had indeed sensed something was wrong with his charge, very wrong, but did his best to keep his place as well as guide his falling son. Only a few days before Bruce's arrival, Alfred had gotten a phone call.

"Hello, Wayne residence."

The other end of the line paused and then cautiously asked, "Is this the residence of Bruce Wayne? "

Alfred smiled and continued, "Yes, indeed, but Master Wayne is not in at the moment. May I take a message?"

The man on the other end of the line continued on nervously, "No, I will try him again later. Thank you."

The phone call ended almost as quickly as it had begun. Alfred shrugged and hung up the phone only then realizing that he hadn't even asked who had called. Checking the caller ID, he noticed something that made his heart fall. It was from Jim's Gun Shop not too far from Gotham, but still far enough for Bruce to wander and definitely not in his character. Alfred ran his fingers absentmindedly over the phone number wondering what Bruce was thinking. Did he mean to harm himself, or perhaps another?

Alfred's thoughts had been interrupted when the clock chimed and he realized he had to pick his charge up. He sighed. Perhaps he would see.

Alfred continued to eye Bruce's sleeping frame. He seemed so innocent right now and so fragile. Bruce looked like for once he was sleeping peacefully that was until a frightful vision from his past began to interrupt his slumber.

Bruce was once again back in the mansion returning Alfred's stare. He smiled and began to walk up the manor steps. Alfred seemed very interested in Bruce and his schooling. Bruce told Alfred he would not be returning. Alfred seemed crestfallen. What could Bruce say? Gee Alfred, I don't think Princeton will accept a murderer back into school…no. Alfred could never know about this. This was between Bruce and Chill. Bruce continued to be lost in his own thoughts but it seemed as though Alfred kept nagging him about one thing or another. Either it was about the master bedroom or about school. God, why did he care so much? No matter what Bruce said, Alfred had some words ready to respond matching wits with the young charge. Bruce in an arrogant voice tired of the battle of wits begged the question if he should keep his past buried with his parents. Alfred told him that he wouldn't tell him what to do with his past but that he cared only for his future. Bruce froze and timidly stared into the eyes of his surrogate father. He really hasn't given up on me, no matter what I have done and I am sure he had heard some stories. Alfred smiled in return.

Alfred hoped that this small word "never" would be enough to help Bruce out of his despair. He wanted Bruce to know that he wasn't alone in his fears or his feelings. Alfred would always be his family even though it wasn't blood. Unfortunately there wasn't much more Alfred could do to reach out to Bruce, but hope that the young man understood Alfred's plea.

Bruce went into his room and eyed the gun. The way Alfred acted today was odd… maybe he does know about the gun. God, what am I doing? Bruce thought.

Alfred nervously dusted. He refused to watch the trial on TV. He was quite fearful that either Bruce would murder Chill or do something to himself. Either option was not pleasurable. Alfred prayed.

Alfred's memories returned to the present as he sat looking at the clock. It was nearing the 18th hour and Bruce had yet to awaken. Maybe he is getting better, Alfred thought. He reached a tentative hand to place a cool compress on his head. Suddenly he felt a hand grabbing his arm. Bruce's eyes opened pleading with Alfred's.

"It was for him. It was always meant for him."

Alfred's brow furrowed in sadness. The truth was told. Bruce was planning on being a murderer. Alfred's first instinct was to pull his hand away from Bruce. Bruce wouldn't let it go.

"Please understand," his eyes looked wild.

"If that woman didn't step in, my fate would have been very different. I may not have been with you here right now." His arm grew weak. "Maybe I deserve this, poison in my veins."

Alfred gazed at his charge and sighed. He felt his own hand grip Bruce's arm tighter.

"Bruce, you may have had the desire to harm Chill but you didn't."

Bruce closed his eyes unable to face Alfred.

"I didn't because the chance was taken from me."

Alfred cocked his head to the side.

"Was it?"

Bruce looked disgustedly at Alfred.

"I don't have the mentality to play these games old man."

Alfred smiled.

"Whatever your original intentions Master Wayne, you didn't follow through with them. There is nothing to be forgiven for."

Bruce refused to listen.

"Another sin searching for redemption."

Alfred shook his head and whispered softly "Oh, Bruce." Then he said something he promised he would never say,

"Bury your past."

I hope you all enjoyed this chapter. For some reason, I had a hard time getting to it. I am going on vacation to Disney World soon and I think I have Mickey Mouse on the brain! Please, please , please review! I love reviews of any kind.