Interlude 3-A: Once Was Blind But Now I See.
"Nunnally, it's been a long day. I think we should call it a night soon."
Big Brother is always worried about me. I can't say I blame him. A sibling who's blind and crippled? That would be worrisome enough for anyone. But for people like us, who have no parents, a past we cannot return to, and an uncertain future on top of that?
But listening to him now? It's been a long time since he's sounded so...so...free.
Like a weight has been lifted off his shoulders. Not just his identity as Zero. He's worried about things happening to me. As though there was something dangerous that my condition would prevent me from escaping.
Or...if we were exposed, about what would happen if I were sent back to the homeland.
I've been so very, very foolish.
"You look more tired than I am, ルルシュ兄さま. (Big Brother Lelouch). I'll go to bed in a moment, I just want to say hi to everyone."
How could I have been so blind, so stupid, as to not see what he's done to himself? His rage is terrifying. Just like the man I once called Father.
And in his quest for revenge against Charles zi Britannia, Lelouch has been walking along the edge of a knife.
If he falls one way, he dies. Another way, and he could become someone even more terrifying than the Emperor. His anger gives him drive, direction.
But he'll burn himself to a cinder if we don't protect him from himself.
I smile happily as he kisses my cheek and lets out a yawn as he goes upstairs to his room.
I giggle to myself, "Maybe I'll ask to smoke with him some time. It really does seem to help him."
Milly goes wide-eyed as her jaw drops at my statement.
"Nunnally! How did you know about that?! Lelouch would be furious if he thought we told you about marijuana!"
I snort and turn to the group. "I was blind, Milly, not senseless. Cannabis has a distinctive smell. And the only reason Big Brother doesn't get called out on it is because half the school doesn't even know what it is, and the other half either doesn't care, is a bunch of fangirls, or is scared of him."
Suzaku chuckles from where he's leaning on the wall.
"Before the war, no one ever really cared in this country. And I've noticed Britannia doesn't care that much, either, just so long as you do your job. Now if you're using something stronger like Refrain, THAT people will get angry about."
Kallen flinches at that remark. Hmm, something to ask her about later.
But I'm going off track. I need to explain part of their duty to them.
"Everyone, please listen to me. You are all loyal to my brother and his ideals. So please, do me this one favor."
Audience attention grasped, focus on the speaker, now for the explanation.
"Be his friend."
Suzaku understood me instantly. He's nodding solemnly. I think Milly gets it, but the others are confused.
That's alright. This needs to be spelled out, anyway. "He needs friends, people to stay his hand. To tell him he's wrong sometimes. To keep him from falling into darkness. Miss CC, you know what I mean, don't you?" I say turning to her with a sharp look.
It's so very easy for people to underestimate the crippled, blind girl. To forget who my parents are. Who my brother is. Who I am.
Nunnally vi Britannia. Princess in Exile, and once 87th in line for the throne of Britannia. Tonight, I am reminding them that my brother is not the only one who has the gift of charisma.
I cannot lead a nation, not the way he can. Perhaps I might be a good leader, if I had people who believed in me and good advisors. But I do not seek such power.
I'm simply a girl trying to keep her brother alive and his soul intact.
CC nods. "Lelouch is strong, One of the strongest men I've ever known. I said once that he was like Little Nobu. Looks like he took that to heart, even more than I thought," she chuckles to herself.
Little Nobu? "Miss CC, who are you talking about?"
Kallen gently touches my shoulder, "Nunna, you heard your brother's title? He's not the first person ever to claim it."
"Miss Kallen, what title? I don't understand what you're talking about. Who is this Nobu person?"
Mr. Orange looks very funny when he's confused.
Kallen stands up and coughs before taking a deep breath.
"それで我は大六天魔王だ。 'For I am the Demon King of the Sixth Heaven.' It's the title Zero claimed at the lake. It belonged to Japan's greatest warlord, Oda Nobunaga. The title is...the closest equivalent that Britannia or the EU has to that would be the Devil," she finishes.
The strength seems to go out of my arms as I slump back in my wheelchair. It's just as I thought. He's turning himself into a demon.
"A sword that never leaves its sheath will only rust. But a sword that is not, CANNOT be sheathed, will be consumed by bloodlust," CC intones solemnly.
She stands up and...there's something very sad about her eyes. Like someone who's seen far too much in their life.
"I am immortal. I have seen a many great men in my lifetime. Nobunaga Oda was one of the most terrifying. By laying claim to his mantle, Zero has proclaimed that he answers to no one, and shall do whatever is necessary to defeat Britannia and all other enemies."
She paces in front of us, "Nobunaga won by audacity, and his willingness to do what others would not, for reasons of tradition, morality, or lack of vision."
She turns around, "If we do not hold him back, the sword that is Zero will continually sharpen and cut until it either breaks from stress, or becomes something evil."
The sword that is Zero... For some reason, that feels right. He is like a sword when he's in costume. Purer, more refined. Just hearing his voice was powerful.
Now Suzaku has stepped up.
"I know Lelouch. His bloodlust may be driving him to revenge, but he has higher ambitions too. We have to make sure that his higher ideals and dream are what guideshim, not his warmongering fury."
Suzaku kneels before me, looking with hopeful yet teary, emerald eyes, "I won't let him destroy himself the way I did for seven years."
Lelouch had told me in private about Suzaku's death wish. That he had wanted to die in Britannia's service as penance for killing his father. Which is somewhat ironic,considering that Big Brother would like nothing more than to butcher our fath— no, the Emperor. After the suffering that man has caused and his abandonment of us, as well as the OSI assassins we evaded, I understand why Lelouch can't let go. But I still want to see him face to face. I need to know why he had done it.
I lean forward and give Suzaku a hug. As much as I might have had a crush on him before, I can see now we wouldn't be right for one another. He and Big Brother need each other.
Kallen rubs her forehead as she leans back on the couch, "Every time I think things make sense lately, life throws out another curveball."
I used to like sports. Before...my accident. Maybe one day I'll be able to play them again. Hmm, on the upside, with my eyes open, I can play catch now.
"Kallen, life is what happens when you're making other plans," I say with a giggle.
Mr. Orange is saluting with tears in his eyes, "You are truly wise beyond your years, Your Highness."
"Seriously, Gottwald, the crazy loyalty thing is kinda weird. Do you ever stop doing that?" Kallen says with an exasperated sigh.
Jeremiah blinks at the comment and tilts his head, "Doing what? I'm merely showing proper respect to Her Highness."
I can see why Big Brother keeps him around. The sad thing is, he would have been like a father figure to us if we had stayed in Britannia. Much more than the Emperor ever would.
"Kallen, be nice. Mr. Orange can't help his fanatical loyalty. It's why Mother always made sure he was almost always the guard watching us play, back at the Aries Villa," I chide her gently.
"Truly halcyon days, my lady. Life was so much simpler then," he sighs wistfully.
Sayoko walks up, her eyes troubled.
"Sayoko?"
She bows deeply to me, "許してくれ、ナナリ~さま。 (Forgive me, Lady Nunnally.) I hid my abilities and identity as a ninja in your brother's service only by his wishes."
I hug her around the waist, "There is nothing to forgive. My brother is a very silly person sometimes," I say mischievously.
Hmm. Yes, I think I need to do that.
"Sayoko, I wish to make you a Knight of Honor."
She rubs my head gently, "I'm afraid Master Lelouch has already beaten you to it."
I pout and scrunch up my face, "Big Brother is stealing all my fun."
Milly walks up and kneels in front of me, "I'm sorry for lying to you too. Can I make it up to you with something you'll like?"
I hug her tightly, "Of course you can, Milly. What did you have in mind?"
Huh. Now I understand why Big Brother feels nervous around Milly. Her smile is like the Cheshire cat, crossed with a Burmese tiger. Nothing good can come of that smile.
"Weeeeeell, I was thinking. We haven't had a festival in awhile. And you know how Lelouch can't refuse you anything. So I was wondering, do you think you can convince him to cross-dress again now that you can finally see it with your own eyes?" she finishes with a cat-like gaze.
If she hadn't staked her claim on Big Brother already, I'd be badgering him to grab her and not let go. She knows exactly how to lighten up the atmosphere.
Not to mention I have wanted to see just how good big brother looks in a dress. Sure, he'll hate it, but that's just because Milly always takes pictures and never stops bugging him about it.
I hold up a finger, "On one condition. You can only take photos with my approval...and I keep the negatives."
It's so hilarious seeing Milly get one-upped by something so simple. Really, Milly, you of all people should know better.
"But! How will I embarrass him into helping with the budget and other things?" she whines.
I give her a flat stare. "Do have any idea how much Big Brother hates you taking photos of him cross-dressing? And besides, for the budget, just have him set aside a discretionary fund for 'Milly has an idea' or something. That way he won't be scrambling to fix everything at the last minute."
Oh no, Kallen. Don't start smiling just yet. I'm going to have FUN with this.
"In fact, I have an idea. Next month, let's have a cross-dressing talent show as part of the festival. Everyone has to act like their opposite gender," I smile deviously.
Dance my puppets, dance. ...Oh dear, now I understand why Big Brother enjoys messing with people so much. This is horribly addictive.
Maybe it's in the blood?
Big Brother will know I'm guilt-tripping him, but I honestly doubt he'll care. Without Milly harassing him about it, he probably won't be as frustrated as last time this happened.
I sit back, watching Kallen sputter as Milly teases her, while Suzaku sips a cup of tea, sitting in a chair next to me, his expression content.
Jeremiah and Sayoko have gone to the kitchen, I think. They make a cute couple.
Hmm, CC seems to have disappeared. It's no great leap of logic to figure out where she went. Everyone else knows after all, that she's the one holding Big Brother's leash. Even the King of Hell needs a Queen.
I've made so many friends tonight, new and old. My brother is acting more free and lightheartedly than he has in a long time. And I can finally see again after seven years. Even if the future is uncertain, I think this is the start of something grand.
This has been such a wonderful night.
