Chapter 9: Distance

Scarlett's first inclination had been to run home to Tara. Unable to face the possibility of seeing Rhett again, she left the next morning, ignoring Melanie's pleas for her to 'Just talk to Captain Butler!' But Tara had offered nothing but hours of silent, slow country life with nothing to distract Scarlett from her tormented thoughts. She was so plagued by them that when Melanie and Pitty's inevitable letter came begging for her to return, she had her bags packed and was in Atlanta the next afternoon.

For the next four months, Scarlett did not see Rhett once. She heard no reports of the "vile speculator" in the city, and she began to wonder if she really had been the only reason he'd visited Atlanta so often, as Melly had said. He had never been away for so long, and Scarlett tried to come to terms with the fact that she would probably never see Rhett Butler again.

After pitying herself and moping about at Tara, Scarlett resolved that she would not let Rhett Butler get the best of her! He was a blackguard and an awful, terrible man who did not deserve another thought from her. She resolved to think about it tomorrow and threw herself headfirst into any distraction to keep her thoughts away from that loathsome man.

When Ashley came home on furlough for Christmas, Scarlett was happier than she'd been in some time, and she hardly heard a word he said, so enraptured was she at being in the same room with Ashley again. The whole family had assembled in Atlanta for the holiday, and it was the happiest time anyone could remember having in a long time.

Despite the joyous distractions, however, Scarlett's traitorous thoughts still strayed to Rhett as she wondered what kind of holiday he was having. She knew he was not welcome in his father's home, but did he have friends to celebrate with? Her heart tugged at the thought of him alone in a hotel room somewhere without anyone to share the Christmas feast with. Or how despite the hundreds of dollars he had spent on presents for her, he may not have received a single one himself on Christmas Eve.

She pushed these thoughts from her head quickly with the assurance that he probably had dozens of girls competing for his attention on Christmas or, at the very least, he had paid someone to spend the holiday with him.

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Rhett had spent his Christmas holiday as he had spent every Christmas since he was 20 years old; getting mind-numbingly drunk. This holiday was certainly no exception, especially since he had made the regrettable decision of coming to Atlanta late Christmas Eve.

He'd buried himself in business, and the last few months had been the most profitable of his life as the blockade tightened and Rhett gave little care to his own safety as he piloted boat after boat into Charleston Harbor. Then, recognizing that the tide of war was turning, he'd sold off his ships and lamented about what to do with himself next. He'd considered joining the army just to get her out of his mind. Or sailing to Europe to put some distance between them. However, no matter what he tried, she had infected him, and he was tormented by those words he'd said for no other reason than to cause her pain. He just couldn't seem to forget how hurt she'd looked. It was haunting him.

He sat by himself in a dark corner of the saloon, a full bottle of whisky sitting in front of him. The bar was near empty. Only the most pathetic to keep him company. Those who had no home or loved ones to spend the holiday evening with. Even Belle had traveled to New Orleans to be with her son.

It was just as well because he did not make for a good companion that evening. Other than the packages of necessities he had left with Rosemary for her and their mother, Rhett had only bought one gift. On his last stop in England before giving up blockading, he had been distracted by a simple but hefty emerald solitaire necklace. It had been in a jeweler's window near his hotel that he had been unable to avoid.

The first day he had seen it, he had been annoyed. On the second day, he glared at it so sternly that the jeweler inside probably feared for his own safety. By the middle of the week, he purposefully walked several blocks out of his way to avoid going past the window. On the last day of his trip, when the bellboy had already loaded his bags into the carriage, he purposefully stalked up to the door and ordered the necklace to be boxed up without even looking at it.

That weakness had gnawed at him, and his mood had been so black that his crew had done everything possible to avoid him on the trip back. But that afternoon, after unceremoniously and unexpectedly finding himself in an Atlanta hotel room, he had opened the box. The damn thing sparkled like her eyes, and he quickly snapped it closed and stuffed it in the very bottom of his valise before walking out of his hotel room and straight to Belle's.

And there he sat, on the eve of the Savior's birth, contemplating the multiple personal failures that had resulted in his sitting there. He had it bad, and at that moment, he had settled on the uncommon emotion of self-pity when he was startled out of his thoughts.

"Captain Butler?"

Rhett looked up to see Ashley O'Hara standing beside him, "Major O'Hara," Rhett said, nodding at the younger man.

"Mr. Butler, I want to know your intentions towards my sister."

Rhett, always amused by what life had to offer, had to laugh at the scenario of another of Scarlett's kin confronting him. "That is between your sister and me," he sneered, turning away from Ashley.

"As her brother, I have every right - sir, to tell you to stay away from her," Ashley said, walking around the table, outraged at Rhett's dismissal.

Rhett laughed, "Believe me, major, I'm much more afraid by what your sister would do to me if I came sniffing around at her skirts than I am by you."

"So you agree to stay away from her then?" he asked, glad to have the horrible matter over with.

"I promise no such thing," he said, sloshing whisky into his glass and taking a hearty drink. "If Scarlett can see it in her cold, bitter heart to welcome me back into her good graces, I can guarantee you, I'd jump like a trained poodle at the chance," he said, the irony not lost on him.

"I must demand, sir, that you stay away from her. You bring her nothing but disgrace. I will not have my sister brought to your low down level!" he exclaimed honorably.

Rhett rolled his eyes, amazed at the difference in character between the two oldest O'Hara children. "What are you going to do if I don't stay away from her, Mr. O'Hara? Call me out?" Rhett asked, tiring of the conversation. He laughed at the horrified look on Ashley's face, "I thought not. Now, if you please, I'd like to enjoy my whiskey in peace."

Defeated, Ashley turned and left the saloon.

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Scarlett sat silently at the dining table with the decanter sitting untouched in front of her. Startled out of her reprieve by the sound of the front door opening. She peaked out to see her brother taking off his battered overcoat and hanging it on a hook next to the door.

"Scarlett, dear," he said, "What are you doing still up?"

"Oh, nothing," she lied. "I was having trouble sleeping. Where did you go?"

He paused for a moment, then sighed, obviously hesitant to tell her, "I went to talk to Captain Butler," he said, shocking Scarlett.

Rhett was in Atlanta! How long had he been in town? She'd had no idea he had returned! Was he there to spend the holiday with her? Her mind raced to catch up with her heart.

Then the realization hit her so suddenly it may as well have been a physical blow; He was in Atlanta and hadn't called on her. "What-Why did you go to talk to him?" she asked, trying to sound aloof as her heart constricted.

"I told him to stay away from you, Scarlett," he said in a scolding manner. "A neighbor hasn't come to call since I've been here who hasn't seen fit to tell me about the scandalous company you keep with him and the gossip you've brought upon yourself with the association."

Her disappointment about Rhett was suddenly forgotten, and her green eyes flared, "How dare you, Ashley O'Hara! I'm not a child you can control, and I shall associate with whomever I please!"

"He's not fit company, Scarlett," Ashley pleaded with his sister. "People say he isn't welcome in any home in Charleston, and his own parents won't -"

"Yes, yes, I've heard that all before," she cut him off peevishly. "I don't care what people think. Believe me, Ashley, if Rhett would see me, I'd greet him with open arms!"

"Scarlett, I forbid you from seeing him!" he said desperately.

"You will not!" she cried passionately, "I love him!" The words came out so quickly she did not even contemplate them, but they were so easy to say she instantly realized they were true.

"Scarlett, no…" Ashley pleaded, "He'll never marry you. He will just trifle with you. He'll ruin you." He said sadly.

She looked at her brother sadly, "That may be true, Ashley, but I can take care of myself, and I'd appreciate you having a little more faith in me. I can't help the way I feel about him, and you certainly aren't going to keep me away from him."

Ashley shook his head, once again defeated by a stronger will than his own, "Alright, my dear, let's not talk of this anymore. I'd hate to have my last memory of you us fighting over this. There is so much to memories…"

"Don't talk that way, Ashley. The war will be over soon." She said with childlike certainty.