Rei: OMG! You guys are so nice to me! Squee Thanks for all the reviews, I enjoyed them immensely and I'm happy that you all weren't mad at me for the prologue length. Mwaha. I'm in the mood to update, so I hope you all enjoy the chapter. And also… Some 'friends' may join the games later. Hehe. That may be when this story gets even CRAZIER than it already is. Mwaha. Have fun.
Dedicated to- My lovely reviewers: Kawaii Eyez (much love to you), LastCetra (did ya get my PM? Well anyway don't worry about Reeve), Garvas (too kind!), 0utfoxed (Yes, it's a regular source of entertainment for me too.), Kunoichi Uchiha (thank you!), Monica (awww, I feel so loved, thanks for the praise), Yuffie Leonhart (yes I thought that was funny too, especially the mental image I got. LOL. Thank you!), the oro-ing elf (I LOVE your penname! It's so awesome! And thanks, me too.), Sir Yzal (Thank you so much!), and as well as my best friends. I love you all. Also to Kage, HAPPY EARLY BIRTHDAY!
Disclaimer- Rei: Announcing the disclaimer today instead of me is LOZ! And it's because I'm bored… And my friend loves Loz. Yesh that means you, Darcy.
Loz: Do I really have to do this…?
Rei: Are you kidding me? Listen to your 'Mother'!
Loz: But the last time that happened, all of your 'friends' appeared and blew her up…
Rei: So…? In my dream you all called me mother…which was creepy… Just say it, and I'll give you your bike back.
Loz: FINE… Sniffle Chaotic Rei does not own Final Fantasy VII, Advent Children, Sour Patch kids, or InuYasha. But she does own Spikeh Strife aka Quackers.
NOTE: I am going away on vacation from the 29th to the ninth of July. I won't have any computer access but I'll appreciate your reviews all the same.
The Book of Cloud Chapter One- Off to Edge We Go
"Speech"
'Thought'
Still in Wutai, in the Chocobo Stables (If they don't have one there… Well they do now! Mwaha)-
Yuffie's POV
I have just arrived outside the Chocobo Stables of Wutai… Mwaha. Nobody noticed me leaving my house, thanks to my uberly AWESOME ninja skills. Well, except for that weird old lady from across the street who wears kitchenware as hats. But she doesn't necessarily count (OMG A BIG WORD!) 'cause I'm just too quick for her senile old eyes to follow! NYUCK NYUCK NYUCK.
I opened the doors and immediately the smell of Chocobo and their… should I say 'products' greeted me. Ewww… Where are those grooms? They're supposed to take care of them better. PAY DEDUCTION FOR YOU, NINCOMPOOPS! Hehe. That's a funny word… Like dastard! (A/n: IT IS! Mwaha) I should so call the Old Man that next time I see him. Nyuck.
Anyway, I walked into the stable and headed straight for the stall and in which my sweet chocobo stood in. His name: QUACKERS. No, not really. It's actually… … Don't tell anyone but it is… Spikeh Strife. Nyuck. Kinda stupid, but it's funny in a way. I just call him Quackers because sometimes, he's about as sane as I am. Which isn't much, but who cares? (A/n: Maybe the people you live with… XD) As you can guess, he's a very pretty chocobo. He's a whitish-gold chocobo with these awesome blue eyes. See? That's why I named him after Cloud. It's his animal form. Or I guess you could say POULTRY form… Nyuck nyuck.
He's also incredibly cute. Sometimes he does stuff he shouldn't have, and you get mad at him, but then he's all guilty looking and he has those damnable adorable cute blue eyes. He hangs his head like he's about to get executed, but you can't get the image of those eyes out of your head. He's like a puppy… Or better yet those Sour Patch kids you see in the commercials. LOL. Cloud reminds me of one of those too, because when he looks guilty he has that SAME CUTE FACE (well maybe not the same)… Argh. Cloud, sometimes I wish you weren't so cute. But then again, it wouldn't be the same… Poop. At least if you were a Sour Patch kid I wouldn't eat you… I think. (0.o)
Wait a minute, what am I saying! The day Cloud stops being cute AND hot is the day Nanaki will fly in the air with a girl in a skin-tight suit with a giant boomerang on him. …HOLD THE PHONE! OMG! That could actually happen… I think. Gawd. I need to stop watching so much InuYasha. It's affecting my MIND! ……….But I do think that if Kirara were real she could so get together with Nanaki. Kinda. She doesn't talk though… Oh well!
I greeted my chocobo with a loud "HIYA QUACKERS!" Spikeh jumped from where he was in his stall, and then he looked at me with a slightly pissed look. I pouted. "Aww, not happy to see me? Well, you should be. We're going to go visit Cloudy!" Spikeh aka Quackers warked, seeming to cheer up a little. YAY!
I put on his chocobo-bridle thing and set a pad on his back. I mean, I don't want a sore butt. Next thing you know I'll be wondering why I didn't put a pad/saddle thingy on. SO, to avoid a severely-abused-but-still-sexy-tushie I put a pad on his back. I am thinking ahead! Vinnie would be so proud of me! Cue cheesy grin here Nyuck nyuck nyuck. Maybe I should bother the vampire too. Maybe not, he might go demon on me and then I'd be forced to kick his butt. Well, maybe not… But I could try!
I then also tied my bags to the strap that held his pad to his body. I needed my stuff, just like any other person. So then I led him out the door, ignoring the warks of the other chocobos. "Nope, sorry guys, but you'll see Chocoboy later." (Chocoboy meaning Cloud) I kicked open the door (Not too inconspicuous is she? XD) and then leaped onto Spikeh's back. I leaned forward and whispered into his ear, "Ride on Spikeh! Lets go to Edge!"
He warked in excitement and then he leaped into a super-fast gallop. WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! My chocobo is the fastest there is, except… URK… Ehehe, my stomach is starting to act up a little…. Hopefully I won't blow chunks on him. And I certainly don't want Spikes seeing me like this! I swallowed, and tried my hardest to keep my thinking off my poor stomach…
Five minutes later… 'Well that didn't work…' "Ulp!" 'How frickin' far are we from Edge, anyway? And Spikes BETTER BE THERE… Or I will be forced to raid his underwear drawer. Hmmm… I could ask him that question for my story… OMG! I could picture it now:
Yuffie: "HEY SPIKES! Do you wear boxers or… giggle briefs?"
Cloud: "…….."
Yuffie: Grinning "Or how about… nothing at all?"
Cloud: "…."
Yuffie: "Or maybe… OMG Cloud I can't believe you wear women's underwear! Seriously!"
Cloud: "Yuffie, shut up."
'Or maybe I could just plain old raid it… Hehe. He might Omnislash my ass if he finds out, but HEY! I'm the Great Ninja Yuffie, of course he won't! Stealth is my forte! (Is that even a word? I forgot --) Well, as long as Boobs doesn't find out and snitch on me. Sometimes I swear she likes ruining my fun. HMPH! We all know she'd just love to take a peek too. Or even more than that. I always knew she had a bad obsession… But this is Tifa! She'd never admit it, just hide it behind a sickly sweet-but-still-nice smile. Ah well. She's my best friend, besides Cloudy, Renoand Twinkletoes! (Vincent. I gave him that nickname… all because of his awesome boots. LOL.) Well I don't know if he considers us friends, but I do! 'Cause I'm nice and Vinnie needs friends. Awww. He and Cloud should open up more, and then run their own angsty coffee shop where all the weird jazz people go. LOL. But I'd love the coffee. It makes me hyper. (No offense intended to anybody!)
As I get my head out of my thoughts, 'wait a minute! That didn't make sense! Argh. Oh well…' I looked ahead and wistfully wished I had a motorcycle like Cloud's. OH COME ON… it's sexy! And I bet he listens to music when nobody's around. That is so like him! I bet he secretly listens to Sephiroth's theme. No really. It's so cool! Even IF he was one insane and evil crazy cracker! Now I really wish I could listen to something, 'cause all I hear is my own theme and a mix of the chocobo theme. Weird, but catchy! (I have NO idea if it is… This is Yuffie here, peoples)
And speaking of chocobos, I had the weirdest dream last night… Y'know that one dude, named Loz? Yeah, the one I like to call Little John? (Again, that was me with the nicknames again.) Shortest silver hair and freaky green eyes? Yeah. That one. Well, he was in my dream last night.
Remember how Cloud said he was driving out on the wasteland when all of a sudden two silver haired guys named Little John and Mr. Pretty- cough I mean Loz and Yazoo? Well he was telling me about this. And so in my dream, Spikes is driving on his sexy black motorcycle when all of a sudden Loz appears, and he grips his electric thingy on his arm before he goes, "license and registration… Chicken fucker!" and tries to zap Cloud. LOL. It would've been a lot funnier if Cloud was actually ON a chocobo! (The quote isn't mine, it was from some other movie that I can't remember at the moment but the reason it's here was because I saw it in a parody of AC. LOL. So funny!)
And to continue my freakishly weird yet funny dream, they fight, like how he told us, and then at the end, Yazoo goes 'Hey brother! Lets play William tell!' And then he shoots Spiky's awesome sunglasses off! NOOOOOO! I loved those sunglasses! Cloud stops and then he glares at him and goes, "YOU SON OF A BITCH!" In a really high-pitched voice. LOL. And then, Mr. Flamey Butt appears with little mini Reds and then the Circle of Life song plays from Lion King! It was sooo weird! Yet it kind of made sense…
Well anyway I just wasted 10 minutes recounting this! Spikeh warks really loud to shake me out of my thoughts. That worked pretty well actually…
All of a sudden I feel a buzzing in my pocket, and then the uberly awesome 'victory theme' plays. Just so you all know, I had that ring tone first. Little John copied me because he couldn't decide if the Jenova ring tone was appropriate to use in front of Robin Hood and Mr. Pretty. (Robin Hood isKadaj. Me being silly again.) 'HOW DARE YOU STEAL MOTHER'S SONG!' Is what I could imagine now. Wait a minute, I just did. Ah well… I flipped open the phone and it was Reno! I wonder what that turkey could want? I could only guess. He's one of my other best friends too. NOT LIKE THAT YOU PERV… But yeah. Still a good friend. We have parties where we basically dress up as someone else and then go stalk Rufus. It's so much fun! We like to sneak up behind him and then spin his wheelchair around. LOL. But anyway, he's talking. (Rufus fans, don't kill me. It's just for humor, and they never hurt him. XD)
"Yuffie, are ya there! I'm talking to ya, so answer yo!"
"Whoops, sorry there Turkey boy! What cha want?" I grinned. Reno never really called unless he wanted to schedule another sleep over. And just so you all know, I sleep in the guest room while he sleeps in his! I'm not a pervert unless it comes to Clo- I mean NOBODY! Yuffie doesn't get dirty thoughts… ehehe.
"I wanted to see if you could come over again sometime this week. Although we've got ta keep it on the down low, yo, 'cause Rufus said he'd give me a pay deduction if we pushed him down the stairs again." (Okay… Maybe just a little. Dodges knives Be kind to my mistakes!)
"That fruit always says that to you Reno, and yet he never does! I think he likes you!" I teased. (I always call him a fruit because of how his hair looked orange in the game… and so there he is an orange, which is a fruit! I win! XD)
"Don't even THINK like that, stick girl. That's horrible, yo!" I could just picture him shuddering over the phone. LOL!
"Haha, ya know I'm kidding. But I dunno if I can, 'cause I'm planning on visiting Spiky and spying on him for this new idea I got." I then did my evil ninja laugh (Nyuck). And then I added as I realized it: "I am not a stick girl, and you know it!" Yes that's right people, I am not a stick girl anymore! I've got curves to show it, and for once I don't look like a little girl next to Tifa. I'm a freaking 20-year-old woman, it's about time I look it.
"What kind of idea? Were you planning on confessing that little crush ya had on him for forever?" OOOOH I bet he was smirking on the other line. Ass.
"I was going to spy on him… I have the power to become an authoress, and I plan to use it with my subject matter, Cloud. 'Cause I couldn't really write as much about anyone else."
"Yeah… How are you planning to write this? Are you sure you won't be able to write something other than 'he's gorgeous' all over the pages?"
"Of COURSE I can! I'm the Great Ninja Yuffie after all! Nothing escapes me and my attention won't with this project!" I would keep that declaration in my heart, and I promised myself that I wouldn't abandon it. It was one of the best things I thought of for a long time… And this time I would act upon it.
"All right… So where you heading to?"
"I'm going to Edge. I dunno where else he'd be, and if he's not there when I get there he's gonna get his ass handed to him."
"Right… Well I got to go, yo. I have another assignment to do…" I could faintly hear him grumble something like 'damn Rufus' and I giggled.
"Okay, see ya later you turkey. And say hi to Rude and everybody for me!" It might seem weird but we all had become good friends. However, to Cloud's frustration, they STILL won't join AVALANCHE. LOL. Oh well.
"Yeah yeah… Bye Yuffie." And then there was a click. I closed my awesome phone and stuck it in my pocket. While I had been talking, I didn't even notice any traces of motion sickness! WOW! Talking DOES help sometimes!
A few minutes later Spikeh warked to me and I looked up, and smiled with delight. 'FINALLY! I've arrived in Edge!' I jumped off of Spikeh and patted him. "Good job, Spikeh!" I took my bags off of him and then I gave him a hug. "You go hang out with Chocobo Billy, mmkay? You can see Cloudy later."
He warked in response and then took off for the Chocobo farm. I watched him go, and thought with excitement what Cloud and Boobs would think when I showed up out of the blue. Most importantly, what Cloud thought… I shook my head and then I said, "Well, I gotta go find them. Be prepared everyone! The fun is just beginning!"
End of Chapter One
Rei: Okay, the ending kinda sucked… and the chapter was full of random stuff, but hey I hope at least you enjoyed it enough to review! …Pretty please? I won't be able to update for a while because of my vacation and seeing comments is nice. So review!