CHAPTER 24

NEXT MORNING: CIA

"So where is your partner in crime?" Vaughn asks Sydney as he walks into her and Sark's office.

Sydney winces looking at the empty desk, "He's taking care of something."

"Right" Vaughn says scornfully. "He's probably off doing something stupid."

"He's not." Sydney says angrily.

"Well he's off by himself. Who knows what the hell he's up too, after all this is Sark we're talking about."

Sydney glares at her ex, "Leave it alone Vaughn."

"I can't believe your trusting him. How can you not think he's off planning something?"

Sydney sighs, "Because he's taking care of some personal business."

Vaughn snorts, "Yeah like getting money to form his own organization."

Sydney winces "Not that it is any of your business but he's with his wife."

Vaughn stares at Sydney "His wife? I thought she was dead."

Sydney looks at her ex, "He just found out Cassadine lied. She's in a coma at a hospital in Switzerland... and if you even mention this to anyone especially Alexa I won't stop him when he beats the crap out of you." Sydney says angrily.

"How do you know that he's not lying?"

"Because he doesn't lie to me." Sydney answers as she looks through some papers. "He's going through a lot right now... so just get off his back and mine."

"Sydney"

"Just leave it alone Vaughn." Sydney says coldly. "So stay out of it." She stands storming out of the office, 'Stupid Vaughn.'

"Sydney"

Sydney stops in her tracks when she hears her Dad's voice, "Yeah Dad?"

Jack frowns seeing his daughter's expression, "What's wrong?"

"Just Vaughn being an ass. He started in on Sark being gone. I really don't want to deal with him right now." Sydney sighs

"When will Sark be returning?"

"I have no idea. He's having a hard time deciding what to do." Sydney shrugs

"How is he?"

"He sounded stressed… confused… angry. Its a good thing Cassadine is locked up because if he wasn't..." Sydney shakes her head.

"Dixon told me you are going to Switzerland. Does he know?"

"You know Sark wouldn't ask me to do this."

Jack nods

"I already called Sam. She's got everything taken care of with the kids."

Jack nods

"I just need to finish up some work then I'm leaving." Sydney walks away from her Dad.

12 HOURS LATER: SWITZERLAND

Sark starts in surprise when he sees Sydney in the doorway of the hospital room. "What are you doing here?"

"Besides the fact I'm about to drag you back to your hotel room so you can sleep... just here for you."

"I'm fine."

"Sark when was the last time you slept? Or shaved for that matter?"

Sark runs his hands over his face wincing at the stubble, "I can't sleep." He looks at the bed.

"You need too Sark. Now come on. Lets get you back to the hotel." At his expression she sighs, "I will knock you out and drag you out of here." She threatens

Sark stands "Sam with the kids?"

"Yes." Sydney looks away feeling a sharp pain of sadness when Sark kisses Eva's forehead. She takes a deep breath, 'Don't go all jealous on him. She is his wife. You are...' Sydney winces at the realization, 'the other woman.' She shoves aside her pain 'Don't think about it.'

HALF HOUR LATER: HOTEL

Sydney sits on the bathroom counter as Sark begins to shave. When she notices the exhaustion in his eyes she takes the razor from him at his annoyed expression she responds, "Don't want you cutting yourself." She slowly begins to shave his face. "Nikolai drew you a new picture at school yesterday. I promised him I would give it to you. I put it on the night stand." She rinses the razor.

"How is he?"

"He misses you... like he always does when you leave." Sydney smiles "Alexa slept through the night."

"Good."

Sydney continues to shave him in silence then when she is done she strokes his cheek, "I ordered up some food."

"I'm not hungry."

"Sark you need to eat something."

Sark sighs knowing he can't out argue her, "Fine. I will be right there."

"Good." Sydney kisses his cheek before hopping off the counter and walking out of the bathroom. She heads to the living room where their food is waiting. She pours a glass of wine for Sark and a cup of tea for herself before settling on the couch. She looks up as Sark walks into the living room stopping to grab his glass of wine before sitting on the couch.

Sark takes a drink of his wine before speaking, "Why are you here?" He asks

"I'm here because I wanted to be." Sydney answers as she watches him.

"Why?"

"I was worried about you." Sydney shrugs "I know this is hard for you."

Sark downs the wine setting the glass on the table then leans back "Hard!" He laughs scornfully. He runs his hands over his face. "It was hard enough when I found out about the accident... but now I have to decide if she should live or not."

"Sark"

Sark abruptly stands and walks to the window, "This happened because of me!" He says angrily. "If I hadn't" he runs his fingers through his hair.

"Hadn't what?" Sydney asks softly.

"I let my guard down... I fell for her." Sark grabs a lamp throwing it at the wall.

Sydney winces as he starts throwing things, 'He's letting his anger out.' Once his anger has abated Sydney watches as he stares vacantly at the mess around him. "Sark"

"Its my fault." Sark says hoarsely.

Sydney watches as he slides to the floor and winces at the pain in his eyes and in his voice.

"I caused this." Sark says sadly not reacting when Sydney sits beside him. "She would be living her life if it wasn't for me." He whispers flinching when he feels Sydney take his hand.

"It wasn't your fault."

"I left that day. If I had done what Eva wanted... none of this would have happened." He says sadly. "I caused this... I caused my wife's death." He drops his head on Sydney's shoulder as he silently begins to cry.

"You didn't." Sydney says gently as she strokes his cheek with her free hand. "It wasn't your fault."

LATER

As the two lie in bed facing each other Sydney speaks, "Why won't you tell Alexa about this?"

"It would confuse her." Sark answers after a moment of thought, "She's mourned her mother once... I can't put her through it again."

"Even if one day she finds out you kept this from her? Let me remind you the disastrous history between Dad and me. We didn't speak for years because of secrets."

"I can't." Sark closes his eyes envisioning how his daughter would react to finding out the fact her mother is alive... yet never going to be in her life. "If there was ever a chance she would come out of the coma... I wouldn't even think of taking her off the machines and I would tell Alexa but she's never coming out of it. I can't tell Alexa that... I can't watch her break down. We both know her emotions are too unstable to handle this. I just can't put her through this Sydney. Why can't you understand that?" He asks meeting her gaze.

"Because I know what it felt like when I found out my whole life was a lie. Mom's death... Dad's life." Sydney reaches out stroking his cheek. "I am trying to understand it... but after everything you know I went through with my parents lying... I just don't know how you can."

"I have no choice Sydney. I know Alexa is a tough kid but this... she couldn't handle this." He sighs. "Maybe one day I can tell her."

"I just hope she can be more forgiving and understanding than I was to my parents."

Sark searches Sydney's eyes seeing the pain and worry... sadness, "Sydney... I am sorry. I know finding out Eva is alive bothers you."

"It doesn't bother me." Sydney protests

"Sydney"

"She's your wife Sark. I know how much you love her." She takes a deep breath, "And I know you always will. If you suddenly stopped... I'd be worried."

Sark shifts to his back looking at the ceiling, "She always told me that if we hadn't met she'd probably be married to some rich old man and seriously unhappy." He sighs heavily. "Though she probably wouldn't have married me if she knew all I would do would cause her pain." He flinches

"She loved you Sark." When he doesn't reply she reaches out stroking his cheek, "I could see it in the pictures."

"I never meant to fall in love with her. She wasn't part of our world."

"Maybe that's what you needed at that time. We can't plan who we love or when we love them."

Sark sighs, "Its just... after my own parents relationship and Dear Old Dad's affairs... I never wanted to fall in love. I always thought I would fuck it up. And I was right." He says bitterly. "I fucked up Sydney. I should have kept my distance... I never should have allowed things to go that far." He says sadly.

"You wouldn't have Alexa." Sydney points out knowing how much he loves his daughter.

Sark winces "She never would have gone through any of this."

"You don't mean that."

"Overall no... but part of me knows she would have been spared a lot of pain if I had stayed away from Eva." He sighs heavily, "She just wormed her way past my emotions."

"Sark what happened wasn't your fault."

"I caused this... he did this to her because of me."

"Sark he did it for himself... nothing else. He had selfish and cruel reasons to take your wife and children from you."

"He told the doctor that I beat her because she was pregnant. He told the doctor it would be best if the pregnancy was terminated so I couldn't do anymore harm."

Sydney flinches at his vacant tone. "Sark"

"I didn't know Sydney."

"I believe you."

The two lie there in silence until they both fall asleep.

COUPLE HOURS LATER

Sydney stirs when she feels the bed shift and opens her eyes to see Sark reach for his phone that is on the nightstand.

"Dr. Anvenk. I made my decision." Sark takes a deep breath, "When can you turn the machines off? Yes I'm sure. I will be there in an hour." He hangs up staring at the phone. He doesn't react when he feels Sydney touch his shoulder.

"Are you sure about this?"

"No but she wouldn't want this." He takes a deep breath, "I should go get dressed."

"Do you want me to come with you?"

"I have to do this by myself." Sark stands walking into the bathroom.

Sydney stares at him then pulls her knees to her chest, 'He has to mourn his wife again... fully this time.'

HOUR LATER: HOSPITAL

"Are you sure about this Mr. Sark?" Dr. Anvenk asks as he hands Sark some papers

Sark nods signing the papers "She wouldn't want to be like this." He hands the papers to the doctor his attention going to the bed. "She'd hate me for allowing it to go this long."

"We will give you some time with her."

Once the doctor walks out of the room Sark moves to the bed and takes Eva's hand. "There are so many things I wish I could change. I never wanted you to be hurt. Meeting you made me want a life... a family. You gave me that... with Alexa." He smiles "She's so much like you. She has been through so much but she keeps going. You would be proud of her. She has growing up so fast since I found her. Syd keeps telling me that one day Lexa is going to want more freedom... a normal teenage life. I know that Sydney is right... Syd's usually right when it comes to Alexa... and has no problem with telling me I'm being an ass." He winces feeling a sense of guilt at mentioning his lover to his comatose wife. He looks down "I love her Eva. God I never planned to fall in love again. Hell we both know I never planned to fall in love ever. She keeps me out of trouble... as much as anyone can I guess. Syd and I have been through a lot... and we still manage to get along." He smiles faintly. "I think you two would like each other... God knows you would have fun making fun of me. Telling stories of all the stupid things I have done." He takes a deep breath, "Alexa will be fine... after all she's more you than me." He blinks back tears, "I won't let anything happen to her again. No matter how old she gets she's still our baby girl."

SAME TIME: HOTEL

"Hey Mom"

"Sydney" Irina says surprised "Is everything alright?" She asks worried knowing her daughter would never use her emergency number without reason.

"I'm worried about Sark."

"Is something wrong with Alexander?"

"Yes." Sydney pulls her knees to her chest, "Cassadine lied."

Irina sighs, "What did he do this time?"

"Eva... she didn't die that night."

"I guess that shouldn't surprise me."

"She's in a coma. Sark went to have her removed from the machines."

"Sydney... he never really mourned her. He grieved somewhat but he never really closed that part of his life. I guess never finding any bodies made it hard for him to really mourn."

"I've seen him upset... angry... sad... but this... Mom it scares me. His tone was just... not Sark. Even though he can be a cold hearted bastard he has always shown emotions when it comes to Alexa and Eva. But this time... its different."

"Sydney, Evangeline was his first love... and I mean that literally. He barely knew his mother... so there wasn't much love from her. And his father... you know that story. Eva gave him emotions... she made him happy... sometimes I think she made him human. When he found out about the accident you could see him revert back to how he was before Eva and Alexa... I could even see him become worse."

"So what am I supposed to do?"

"If you push him... he will push you away. Its one of the reasons things between he and I are so strained. After the accident, I pushed him too hard... and he pushed me away. You know Sark and I were close."

"Yes he did say you trained him."

"I knew everything about him Sydney. I knew his emotions as well as you do now. I could predict his behavior like you can but after the accident... he shut me out. I think he blamed me for what happened. After that he stopped trusting me... and more so after he found out about you and Jack. Sydney, you are the only one he has let this close to him since Eva. Not even Alison would be allowed this close to him when he's upset."

"So what I'm just supposed to let him shut himself off?"

"No... just don't push him Sydney. That's all I can tell you."

"Alright. Thanks Mom."

"Any time. I love you sweetheart."

"Love you too Mom." Sydney hangs up sighing. 'Hope Mom's right.'

HOUR LATER: HOSPITAL

"Mr. Sark?"

With a final look at the bed where his now deceased wife is, Sark takes a deep breath before standing. "The arrangements have been made to transport her body back to England."

"Yes sir." The doctor nods "We will have her ready."

Sark walks out of the hospital room. 'Good bye my love.'

HOUR LATER: HOTEL

Hearing the door open Sydney looks up from reading to see Sark enter the hotel room and as the door closes he leans against it heavily, "Sark?" When he doesn't answer she stands walking over to him, "Sark?" She reaches out stroking his cheek.

"She's gone." He says hoarsely. He looks at Sydney his eyes filled with pain, "Sydney"

Sydney wraps her arms around his neck as he hugs her back with desperation she has never felt from him. As she feels his body shake with tears and pain she strokes his neck, "I'm sorry." She whispers

HOUR LATER

Sark and Sydney sit on the couch each silent. "Her body is being buried where she was supposed to be buried." Sark finally speaks after an hour of silence. "The paperwork stating her date of death is the day I was told. I'm not changing it... because for all purposes it is the day she" he flinches "died."

Sydney reaches out stroking his cheek.

"I just realized something"

"What?"

"I'm officially widowed."

Sydney winces at his tone.

"Sydney... why did you come here?" Sark asks curiously

"I didn't want you here dealing with this alone." Sydney shrugs as she trails her fingers across his jaw. "Besides I know that if I needed you... you would be there."

Sark looks down "I miss her Syd."

"I know."

"But I know this was for the best. It wasn't fair to Eva to leave her like that." He takes a deep breath. "At least there's nothing else he can do to us." When he feels Sydney squeeze his hand he looks at her his gaze cold and hard. "I swear Sydney if he ever does get out... I will kill him."

"You know Dad and Dixon will do what they have to do to make sure he never gets out."

"I know."

Sydney stands walking over to the liquor cabinet grabbing a bottle of tequila and two glasses. She returns to the couch opening the bottle she pours them both a drink. "It stops the thinking."

"Works for me." Sark downs his glass pouring another.

TBC…