OK, so maybe I lied. It seems I don't have as much crap going on as I thought I did. Or it could perhaps be because I finished my essay earlier than I thought I would. Surprising, because that was a hard one. I could only write one page, can you believe that! Stinkin' English teacher.

We were finally in our very own solar system. Just as Phantom predicted, it took us a week to make it back. How it took us a week to get from Pern to Earth when it took the original settlers seventeen years to get from Earth to Pern, I'll never know. But we were there, and that was all that mattered, as Joivth would say.

Speaking of Joivth, she was growing fast. She was so big now she had to stay in my quarters while I went to bring her food to her. She was very much looking forward to getting a chance to stretch her wings.

Once again, I had taken the controls. After Goten's last performance, there was no way Phantom and I would ever let Goten pilot again. I checked the monitor, and noticed that we were getting closer to Earth. I slowed the pod down and entered an orbit around Earth. I programmed our coordinates into the computer, and let it find our landing site.

The pod reached the correct angle, and we made our way into the atmosphere the right way. Back in my quarters, Joivth let out a startled bellow. Don't worry silly, we're only making our way through Earth's atmosphere!

I wish I could see it, Joivth complained crossly. I laughed and monitored our progress closely. No matter how good of a pilot you are, something could still go wrong if you're not careful. Goten and Phantom, feeling the change in gravity, made their way to the controls room.

"We're already back?" Goten asked while licking his fingers clean. Phantom yawned and settled himself to watch.

I nodded. The snowy white of Antarctica loomed closer; this landing would be much smoother than our previous one. We hit the snow with a thump right in front of my palace. Goku and Vegeta, who were outside sparring, were the first to notice our arrival.

Goku quickly alerted the others. The rest of the Z warriors massed themselves in front of the pod, with the exception of Mirai Trunks.

Goten and Phantom left the pod to greet my sort-of-loyal subjects, while I struggled to help Joivth out of my quarters.

If we don't break the thing, I'll be coming back for my shrine tonight while everyone is asleep.

Joivth rumbled with amusement. You are so funny!

It took a while, but Joivth barely squeezed through the narrow halls to the hatch. I was in an evil mood, so I decided to leave Joivth in the pod for a while and surprise them all with her arrival.

0000000000

In the shed where I keep Roshi, Oolong, Yamcha, and Old Kai

Yamcha threw open the shabby wooden door. Roshi, Oolong, and Old Kai looked up from their card game. "This had better be good, youngster!" Old Kai said crossly.

"The feminist has returned!" Yamcha announced. "She won't be expecting an attack, I say we go for it while she's unloading all her stuff from the pod, then we take over the palace while she's incapacitated!" Then I'll finally defeat Vegeta and win Bulma back! he thought triumphantly.

The others were shocked by Yamcha's uncharacteristic display of intelligence. "For once, he has a good idea!" Oolong exclaimed.

0000000000

By the time I made it out of the pod, the present Trunks, having collected Goten from the "evil fangirl," was waiting fearfully with Mirai for my emergence. I sighed. I just can't understand why they're both so afraid of me! I only follow them everywhere...

Pan ran up to me and gave me a high five. "So how did pissing the Namekians off go?"

Piccolo and Dende frowned. "You told me you were only going to Namek to get away from stupid people!" Piccolo growled.

I smiled nervously. "Hehehe, that's the thing, we didn't really make it to Namek, so no Namekians were unnecessarily pissed off for my enjoyment."

"Oh no!" Bulma gasped. "The ship malfunctioned?"

"Yes, but it was not of your design," Phantom answered. "We passed through an Oort Cloud, and that was the cause of the error. We crash landed on the planet Pern, where we repaired the problem."

I pouted. I was so looking forward to scaring the pants off them with the appearance of a non-mystical dragon! "Yeah," I confirmed, "and look at what I Impressed while we were there!" I turn to open the hatch to allow Joivth into the rest of the world, when I was attacked from behind.

"YAMCHA!" I screamed.

He grinned and pinned me to the ground beside the ship. "Geez Stephanie, I knew you liked me, but keep it down, we are in public!"

That infuriated me even more. "You bloody hentai, you'd better get off of me, or you'll regret it!"

Roshi calmly walked up from behind the pod. "What are you going to do, Princess? You're not in a very good position to be making threats," he sneered. He then noticed the sound of Joivth's enraged bellow, and the sound of her ramming herself against the hatch, trying to get to me.

I smirked. "I'm not going to do anything. But she might." Right on cue, Joivth broke the hinges off the door and head-butted Yamcha off of me. I picked myself off the ground, and the other two hentais abandoned their hiding places and made their escape before Joivth could go after them as well.

Joivth flared her wings at Roshi threateningly, and her eyes whirled an angry red. Yamcha had lost all consciousness. I glared at Roshi. "I suggest you take him back to your shed. It would be a bad idea to come back here anytime soon."

Roshi made a frightened squeak and hauled Yamcha's body away.

"Say hello to my dragon, Joivth!" I announced to the Z Warriors. "Welcome to Earth Joivth!"

Well, that was a wonderful waste of time! Just kidding. I had originally wanted this just to be a one-shot, but it ended up too long, so I just split it up. Don't understand why you peoples would really care, but you know anywayz. Just consider it more useless little bits of information.