Somewhere in the Orange Ocean on planet Popstar stood an island. Perhaps its' most distinct feature was the tall, steep cliff towards its' east side. Mostly covered with trees, the island looked to be mostly barren, save for a few shoddy-looking buildings. These buildings were part of a summer camp called Camp Pupupunakwa.
On the south side of the island was a dock, where there was a whole tv crew of Waddle Dees. Cameras, boom mics, cue cards, the whole shindig. Most cameras were pointed at one Waddle Dee in particular. He had sleek, black hair, and a slight stubble that darkened the lower part of his cream-colored face. He wore blue tennis shoes and a necklace with a little bag on the end.
"Alright, on my count," said one of the tv crew Waddle Dees. "We're on in three… two… one…"
"Yo!" said the black-haired Dee when the cameras started rolling. "We're coming' at you live from Camp Pupupunakwa, somewhere in the middle of the Orange Ocean in Dream Land! I'm your host, Chris McDee, dropping season 1 of the hottest new reality show on television right now! Here's the deal: 22 campers have signed up to spend eight weeks right here at this crummy old summer camp! They'll compete in challenges against each other, then have to face the judgement of their fellow campers. Every three days, one team will either win a reward, or watch one of their team members walk down the Dock of Shame, take a ride on the Loser Boat…" Chris laughed, "and leave Total Drama Dream Land for good!"
Chris walked towards a campfire circle, where several stumps were arranged as seats. "Their fate will be decided here, at the dramatic Campfire Ceremonies, where each week, all but one camper will receive a marshmallow," he explained to his audience. "In the end, only one will be left standing, and will be rewarded with cheesy tabloid fame and a small fortune, which, let's face it, they'll probably blow in a week. To survive, they'll have to battle Beetleys, Grizzos, disgusting camp food, and each other. Every moment will be caught on one of the hundreds of cameras situated all over the camp. Who will crumble under the pressure? Find out here! Right now! On Total! Drama! Dream Land!
*CUE INTRO*
Back on the docks, the Waddle Dees started to shoot the next scene. "Alright, it's time to meet our campers!" Chris McDee exclaimed. "We told them they'd all be staying at this 5-star resort, so if they seem a little TO-ed, that's probably why."
A small boat appeared on the horizon, carrying the first "camper." As the boat docked, a small, round, pink creature disembarked. He had a cheerful smile on his youthful face as he skipped over to Chris.
Chris gave a friendly wave. "Kirby! How you doin'?"
"Poyo!" Kirby greeted the host.
Chris smiled. "Hah! Good to hear, buddy!"
Kirby looked around at the island. It didn't quite look like how it was described to him. It looked a bit more rustic. "Poyo, poyo?"
"Yep, this is the place," Chris said with a nod.
Kirby was a bit confused at first, but soon his smile returned as he gave another happy "poyo!"
Kirby and Chris heard the sound of an engine roaring, getting louder and louder as another boat approached the pier. On this boat was another Waddle Dee. He looked very similar to any other Dee, the only real difference being the blue bandana he wore on his head.
"Hey, Bandana Waddle Dee!" Chris greeted. "Great to have you here!"
Bandana Dee smiled as he hopped off the ship with his luggage in tow. "Great to be here Chris!" He turned his attention toward the island. "Wow, this place looks… a bit different than I expected. Uh, n-not that that's a problem."
"Heh, I should hope not," Chris said slightly ominously.
Bandana Dee then noticed his friend standing off to the side. "Hi Kirby!"
Kirby waved to the Waddle Dee. "Poyo!"
Once again, another boat sailed up to the dock. This one carried a portly, blue, penguin-like creature dressed in red, royal garb.
"King Dedede!" said Chris with a bow. "It's an honor, Your Majesty!"
King Dedede ignored the host. "You call this a 5-star resort?" he asked. "I've seen public restrooms nicer than this dump. This ain't what I signed up for!"
"Actually Sire, it is!" Chris held up a big stack of legal documents, apparently the ones that the king had signed beforehand.
Dedede grabbed the papers and ripped them up into pieces, then grinned smugly as he threw the pieces into the water.
Chris seemed relatively unfazed, and he pulled out a second stack of papers. "The great thing about lawyers is they make lots of copies!"
Dedede scoffed. "Whatever. I ain't stayin' here." He grabbed his multiple large suitcases and turned with the intention of going back to the boat.
"Cool!" said Chris. "I hope you can swim, though, because your ride just left." He pointed at the boat that had brought the king to the island, now sailing away.
"…Jerk," Dedede muttered as he reluctantly went to stand with Kirby and Bandana Dee, ignoring their attempts at saying hello.
A fourth ship appeared. Standing on the bow of this one was a masked, dark blue figure dressed in shining armor and a cape that fluttered dramatically in the wind.
"Welcome to the show, Sir Meta Knight!" Chris said as the blue puffball jumped off the ship.
Meta Knight took a moment to take in his surroundings. "…So I'm staying at a camp on a barren, treacherous island, and not at a fancy hotel?" he asked, his tone making it hard to pinpoint exactly how he felt about that
Chris nodded. "Correctamundo, dude!"
The knight seemed to be deep in thought for a moment, but then he nodded. "…Perfect. This will do nicely. Exactly what I need to further build my survival skills."
Chris wasn't really expecting that answer, but he decided to roll with it. "Oooooookay then, good luck with that!"
With that, Meta Knight went over to stand with his fellow campers.
Chris turned to see that the fifth boat had already arrived, bringing with it a little lavender ball wearing a blue and red jester's hat and a bow tie.
"Marx, my man! What's up?" Chris asked with a wave.
Marx excitedly hopped up and down. "Hey, hey, hey, Chris! Super excited to be here!" He then ran to greet the other campers. "Hey, hey, hey, Kirby, Bandana Dee, Meta Knight, King Dedede! How're you guys all doin'?"
"Poyo poyo!" Kirby said with a smile.
Meta Knight elbowed Kirby. "Kirby, don't interact with him. He can't be trusted," he whispered to the pink puffball.
"Poyo?" Kirby tilted his head.
"Ooh, here comes Magolor!" Chris exclaimed as another ship stopped at the pier.
Magolor was an egg-shaped creature with blue and white clothes. He had ear-like protrusions coming out of his head, a hood, and hands that floated at his sides.
"Chris McDee!" Magolor shouted as he hopped off the boat. He eagerly shook the host's hand. "It's great to meet you! I have to say, I'm a big fan of your work." He then went to say hello to the others. "Hello friends! How wonderful to see you all again!"
Dedede grumbled. "Great, now we've got the two most loyal of friends here. This is gonna end well."
Bandana Dee patted the king's back. "Oh, Magolor isn't so bad, Sire."
Marx jumped up and down to get Magolor's attention. "Mags! What's up?"
"Marx, my pal!" Magolor waved at his friend. "Long time no see! We simply must catch up!"
"Oh, and now they're teamin' up," said Dedede. "We're dead."
Another ship docked at the pier. On this one was a pale woman with pink hair and business attire. Like Magolor, her hands floated at her sides.
"The lovely Miss Susie!" Chris said as he offered to help her off the boat. "Welcome to Camp Pupupunakwa!"
Susie simply floated past him, her attention on the island itself. She reached into the briefcase she had with her and pulled out a notebook. "Hmm. The natural resources on this island seem to be quite plentiful," she mused as she wrote something down. "This will surely make an excellent place for the headquarters of the new and improved Haltmann Works Company."
"Uh, this island kinda belongs to the producers…" said Chris.
Susie shrugged. "Well, that certainly won't be an issue. I'm sure they'd be more than willing to let it go for the right price." She looked over at the other campers, then gasped as she saw one in particular. "Meta Knight, is that you?"
Meta Knight froze as Susie looked him in the eye "…Oh Nova, please no."
Susie rushed over to the swordsman "Oh, I was hoping I'd be able to see you again! I just know that with a few upgrades you'd make a fine addition to my company!"
Meta Knight tried his best to avert his gaze "…Please leave me be…"
The next guest, once again riding in on a boat, was a dark blue blob with googly eyes and a long tongue.
Chris waved. "Gooey! What's up with you, dude?"
Gooey just sat there, his eyes staring off in two different directions.
"Uhh, Gooey?" Chris waved a hand in front of the blob's face.
"…Who?" said Gooey, confused. "Oh, right, me! I'm Gooey! Sorry, I was just lost in thought."
"Yeah? Whatcha thinkin' about?" asked Chris.
"Oh, I was just wondering…" Gooey rubbed the top of his head with his tongue. "What if badgers could play chess?"
"…R-right. Uh, good to have you here!"
"…Who're you again?"
Another boat came in bringing another guest. This one was a grey mouse with a red cape and matching hat.
"Next up we have the leader of the Squeak Squad himself, Daroach!" Chris announced. "Welcome to camp!"
"Yes, yes," Daroach nodded, though his voice sounded unimpressed. "Remind me again what the reward for this game is?"
"Patience, man." Chris replied. "We'll go over everything once everyone gets here."
"This had better be worth my time," said Daroach.
The next boat had multiple passengers. The three ladies up front were all of the same race, and they all wore the same clothes; black, religious garments. The main difference between the three were their hair colors; blue, red, and yellow
"Coming here on the same boat are the Three Jambastian Mages, Francisca, Flamberge, and Zan Partizanne!" said Chris.
"Bonjam, Chris!" the blue-haired one, Francisca, said as she shook Chris's hand graciously. "Lovely to make your acquaintance!"
Chris raised an eyebrow. "Uh, you mean 'Bonjour,' right?"
Francisca let out a good-natured chuckle. "Heh. No, 'Bonjam' is how we say hello on our planet."
"Yeah, try to show a little respect to our culture, will you?!" shouted the red-haired Flamberge.
Chris took a step back from the fiery mage. "Woah, chill out, I just didn't know!"
"What, just because our language sounds a bit like a different one, we must just be speaking the other language wrong?!" Flamberge's face started to turn almost as red as her hair. "Well let me tell you something, you insensitive jerk! We don't-"
"Flamberge, calm yourself," Zan Partizanne, the one with yellow hair, interjected. "Chris, I believe I speak for all three of us when I say thank you for your hospitality."
"…Make that four," a mysterious voice said.
A fourth passenger exited the same boat as the mages. This one wore a white cloak with gold trim. His hood concealed his face.
"Ah, right! How could I forget this nut job?" Chris said. "What's up, Hyness?"
Hyness turned his attention to the camera crew. "We are… going to be on television… yes?" he said slowly.
Chris gave a quick nod. "A-yup!"
"Well then…" Hyness approached the camera Waddle Dee. "In that case… I have a brief message for those at home…"
Without warning, Hyness quickly grabbed the camera out of the camera Dee's hands and held it up to his face.
"We are the masters of a power driven to the far reaches of the universe, and we have but one desire! Can one such as you possibly fathom how dearly we have clung to this dream across the aeons? How could you! You couldn't! Never ever ever! We who once faced those who were in such fear of our power that they-"
"Ayee… this guy should be fun to be around," Susie whispered to her fellow campers.
"Oh yes," Daroach muttered.
The camera Waddle Dee yanked their camera back and panned back to Chris, Hyness still rambling to no one in particular.
"Okay then!" Chris said with a nervous chuckle. "We're just gonna stop there and move right along!"
The next ship carried two passengers. One was a purple owl, and the other a tan hamster. Swimming next to the boat was a blue ocean sunfish. When the boat docked, the hamster hopped off while the owl flew down to pick up the fish and place him on the pier.
"Ah, hello to the animal trio, Rick, Kine, and Coo!" said Chris.
"Greetings, Chris!" Coo the Owl said with a wave.
"G'day to ya!" greeted Rick the Hamster.
Kine the Fish just laid there silently.
"Bit quiet, isn't he?" Chris asked the other two animals.
"Aw, he's just a bit shy around new folks," said Rick, patting his fishy friend's side. "Don't hold it against 'im."
Once again, Kine said nothing.
Coo leaned in to whisper something to Chris. "…He actually only speaks fish. Rick and I are going to have to translate for you. Uh, don't tell him I said that, though. He gets kind of self-conscious about it."
"Gotcha," said Chris. He would have given the owl finger guns if he had fingers.
The next boat didn't have a guest on it, but rather a fancy, golden mirror. Two intern Waddle Dees carried the mirror onto the dock. Suddenly, a shadowy character stepped out of the mirror as if it were a door. He looked just like Meta Knight, except he was darker-colored, and his mask was damaged in a way that made it look like he had a scar over his eye.
"Dark Meta Knight!" said Chris. "Glad ya decided to show up!"
Dark Meta Knight just walked past without looking the host in the eye. "Hmph. And frankly I don't know why I bothered to."
Meta Knight stepped up to confront his dark counterpart. "So, Dark Meta Knight. We meet again."
"Ah, yes. Now I remember." Dark Meta Knight glared at Meta Knight. "I only hope it comes down to the two of us. I would love to watch you crumble under my superiority."
"Just know that I will not be holding back, and I don't expect you to either."
"Oh, trust me, I don't plan to."
"Ooh, already getting some juicy drama!" Chris said excitedly. "Rivalries always get good ratings."
Chris then saw that the next two campers had already arrived. One was a little girl with a cyan dress and a red beret, and the other was a fairy with a red dress and a matching bow in her pink hair.
"Adeleine! Ribbon! Welcome to Camp Pupupunakwa!" said Chris.
"Good to be here!" The little girl, Adeleine, said in a chipper voice. "But, uh, didn't you say we were staying at a resort?"
"Uh, yeah. I lied," Chris said bluntly.
Marx laughed. "Hah! Respect, Chris!"
"Oh, it doesn't matter," said Ribbon, the fairy. "I'm just happy to see Kirby again." She gave her pink pal a friendly wave. "Hi Kirby!"
"Poyo!"
"You're right," said Adeleine. "Besides, I do like camping!"
"Yeah, camping with my best friend!" Ribbon fluttered her wings. "This'll be fun!"
"Oh, I wouldn't bet on that," Chris murmured to himself
The next guest was a spider-like animal with silver hair, six floating hands, and green clothing.
"Taranza, the bowl-cut intellectual!" Chris waved to the newcomer. "What's good?"
Taranza looked a little sad. "Eh, I've been a bit depressed lately, so not much. I've found myself missing my friend more than usual. I'm hoping being on this show will lift my spirits, though!"
"Oh, I'm sure it will!" said Chris with a sly look in his eye. "You'll 'bee' real happy here, I'll bet! This place is always 'buzzing' with activity! Surely you'll find your time here sweeter than 'honey!'"
Taranza's eyes started to water as he grew more upset with each terrible bee pun. He started violently sobbing as he floated over to the other contestants.
"…You're a jerk, Chris!" Flamberge yelled.
Chris just laughed with no hint of remorse. "Haha! It's a hobby!"
"Again, respect!" said Marx.
"Hey, is this the right place?" a squeaky little voice asked.
Chris saw that the source of the voice was the next camper. This little guy was a blue, big-eared, chinchilla-like animal.
"It sure is!" Chris replied. "Welcome to the show, Elfilin!"
"I'm so excited!" said Elfilin, a twinkle in his eyes. "After that big adventure Kirby and I just had, I can't wait to do something fun and relaxing like camping with him!"
"Heh. 'Relaxing.'" Chris couldn't help but snicker to himself.
"What's that?" Elfilin asked innocently.
"Nothing, little dude," said Chris. "Good to have you here."
Elfilin was a little put off by this, but shrugged it off and went to stand with the others.
Finally, the last boat carrying the last camper arrived. Oddly enough however, this boat had a giant red crystal on it. Three intern Waddle Dees heaved the crystal onto the dock. Upon closer examination, the crystal seemed to have someone inside it; a pink ball, once again looking similar to Meta Knight, but this knight had a fancier mask and feathered wings.
"Wait, seriously?!" Bandana Dee exclaimed in disbelief. "You guys invited Galacta Knight on the show?!"
"The strongest warrior in the galaxy?!" asked Magolor.
"The knight with the power to destroy entire planets?!" added Susie.
"…Yeah," Chris said nonchalantly.
The crystal then started to glow, shining brighter and brighter until…
It shattered. Galacta Knight was free. The other campers all braced themselves for an attack, but the attack never came.
"Don't fret, guys!" Chris told everyone. "The producers made a deal with our friend Galacta here. If he does anything destructive during his time on the show, he's going back in the crystal. And if he wins, instead of the prize money, he gets complete freedom."
"He gets WHAT?!" the others said in unison.
"Are y'all nuts?" said Dedede. "That there's a recipe for disaster!"
"Do you have any idea what he might do if he's allowed to go free?" asked Meta Knight.
"Guess you guys better make sure he doesn't win then!" Chris said, calm as ever.
Galacta Knight said nothing as he went over to stand with the others.
Chris held up his hand to get everyone's attention. "First things first, we need a group photo for the promos!" He announced. "Everyone on the end of the dock!"
The campers all followed Chris's instructions and went to stand at the end of the pier. They got into position as Chris hopped onto one of the boats in order to get everybody in the frame.
"Okay!" he said. "One… two… three." He clicked the button, but the picture didn't take. "Oops! Okay, forgot the lens cap!" He removed the cap from the lens. "Okay, hold that pose! One… two- oh! No, wait. Card's full. Hang on."
"Get on with it!" Dark Meta Knight yelled impatiently.
"Got it!" said Chris. "Okay! Everyone say 'Pupupunakwa!'"
"Pupupunakwa!" everyone said shortly before the dock started to creak under their combined weight. Without warning, the pier collapsed, causing everyone to fall into the Orange Ocean. Chris snapped the photo, getting a great shot of the cast floating in the water.
"Okay guys!" Chris said, not caring about their well-being. "Dry off and meet at the campfire pit in ten!"
"This is Camp Pupupunakwa, your home for the next eight weeks," said Chris, who was currently standing before the cast at the campfire pit. "The campers sitting around you will be your cabin mates, your competition, and maybe even your friends. Ya dig? The camper who manages to stay on Total Drama Dream Land the longest without getting voted off will win… 100,000 Deden!"
"…Alright, you've peaked my interest," Daroach said with a smirk.
"Excuse me, Chris," Susie raised her hand. "What will the sleeping arrangements be exactly? Because I'd like to bunk with Meta Knight if possible."
Meta Knight shuddered at this.
Chris rolled his eyes. "You will be bunking with the other people on your team, which brings me to my next point." He pulled out a piece of paper with names written on it. "We're gonna split you into two teams. If I call your name out, go stand over there," he explained. "Kirby… Dedede… Bandana Dee… Meta Knight… Elfilin… Ribbon… Rick… Gooey… Kine… Adeleine… and Coo. From this moment on, you are officially known as… The Star Allies!"
Chris tossed over a rolled-up pink flag. Elfilin caught it and unfurled it, revealing a white circle with a star in the middle, presumably the team's logo. "Ooh! Pretty!" said Elfilin.
"Did you hear that, Kirby? We're teammates!" Bandana Dee said happily.
"Poyo poyo!" Kirby cheered, happy to be on the same team as his best friends.
The "Star Allies" all made their way to the spot that Chris told them to stand.
"The rest of you, over here," said Chris. "Hyness… Susie… Marx… Zan Partizanne… Magolor… Francisca… Dark Meta Knight… Daroach… Flamberge… Galacta Knight… aaannnnnd Taranza. Move, move, move!"
All of the campers on the second team rushed to the area Chris pointed at.
"Well, I guess Dark Meta Knight is the next best thing to the real thing," Susie said to herself. "He would probably make for a good Mecha Knight as well."
Dark Meta Knight silently shuffled away from Susie upon hearing that.
"You guys will officially be known as… The Dark Matters!" Chris said, tossing Hyness a red flag with a picture of an eye in the middle.
"…I would have preferred 'The Jamba Mages'… but what can you do?" said the Jambastian priest.
"Alright, campers!" said Chris. "You and your team will be on camera in all public areas during this competition." He then walked over to an outhouse and pointed to it. "You will also be able to share your innermost thoughts on tape with video diaries in the Communal Outhouse any time you want! Let the audience at home know what you're really thinking, or just get something off your chest."
Chris then allowed anyone who wanted to to try out this "Communal Outhouse" to share their thoughts.
*CONFESSIONAL*
Kirby: Poyo!
Hyness: …I believe I will use this as an… opportunity to share the word of our Dark Lord… You see, Void Termina-
Gooey: Uhh… I forgot what I was gonna say.
Galacta Knight: …
*END OF CONFESSIONAL*
"Any questions? Cool," Chris said when everyone was done, not giving them a chance to ask anything. "Let's find your cabins!"
Chris McDee led the campers to two shabby old cabins. "Allies, you're in the east cabin. Darks, you're in the west," he told them.
Kirby led the rest of the Star Allies into the building. Inside were several bunk beds with worn-out mattresses.
"Well, this is cozy," Elfilin said as he placed his tiny backpack onto his bunk.
"Cozy. Sure, that's one way to put it," Coo responded.
Adeleine looked around, then turned to Chris. "Uh, where's the bathroom?"
"The communal bathrooms would be that-a-way!" Chris answered, pointing.
Dedede grimaced. "Are the bathrooms regularly cleaned?" he asked.
"I mean, you can clean them if you want," Chris replied snarkily.
"C'mon, I'm a king! I deserve a clean bathroom!" Dedede complained.
"Welp, you can always go in the woods if that makes you more comfortable." Chris chuckled to himself.
Dedede frowned, but decided to leave the conversation at that.
"You've got half an hour to unpack and meet me back at the main lodge," said Chris. "Starting now!" With that, Chris left the crew to their own devices.
"Hey guys, can someone make my bed for me?" asked Marx. "Kinda hard to do without hands, y'know?"
"Marx, you are fully capable of making your own bed and you know it," Daroach droned.
"So, Galacta Knight," Magolor attempted to converse with the silent warrior. "You excited for all the fun activities you're gonna do with all your friends?"
Galacta Knight turned to Magolor and glared at him. He said nothing, but the look in his eyes seemed to do the talking for him: "stay out of my way, and you won't get hurt."
"Oookay, buddy, good talk!" Magolor said as he slowly backed away, doing finger guns as he did.
Before long, the thirty minutes of unpacking time had run out, and the campers made their way to the main lodge to meet with Chris.
"Lunch is ready!" A goofy-sounding voice filled the main cabin/dining hall. "Come and get it, folks!"
The source of the voice was an orange, egg-shaped chef. He wore a white apron and a chef's hat. This was Chef Kawasaki, the cafeteria's caterer. The sets for Total Drama Dream Land were pretty expensive, so the crew had to cut costs where they could. Kawasaki was one of the cheapest cook they could find. It was either him or a hardened war veteran.
The campers lined up at the counter to get their lunch.
"Heh, 'bout time!" Dedede said as he approached Kawasaki. "What're we havin'?"
"I call it Leftovers Casserole!" the chef proudly proclaimed. "I mixed up all the TV crew's leftover lunches from the past week, and made it into one dish. Resourceful and delicious!"
Dedede gagged as Kawasaki scooped a ladleful of brown mush onto his plate. "Bleh! You call this food?" he asked, clearly offended. "First we end up at this crummy summer camp instead of a nice hotel, then we find out that this garbage boy is the head chef! I'd better get some good grub right now, or I swear I'm gonna-"
Before Dedede could finish, Kawasaki pulled out a cleaver. He had the same goofy smile on his face, as well as a glassy look in his eyes as he brandished the blade. "Careful what you say there, Sire."
Dedede's eyes widened as he stared at the knife. "H-h-hey, y'know what? Slop's fine! Slop's good!"
Kawasaki nodded and put the cleaver away. "That's what I thought."
Shaken up, Dedede took his sludge to the table. The others all got their food before sitting down themselves, each team sitting at one table.
As the campers poked at their food, Chris walked into the dining hall. "Welcome to the main lodge!" he said. "Your first challenge begins in one hour!" Then, just as quickly as he came in, Chris left.
"First challenge, huh?" Zan Partizanne mused. "Wonder what it'll be."
"They'll probably start us off with something simple," said Daroach.
"Well, when compared to the other challenges, sure, 'simple,'" Chris said to himself as he eavesdropped on the conversation from outside the cabin.
Little did any of the campers know, this competition was anything but simple.
REMAINING CAMPERS
STAR ALLIES
Kirby
Dedede
Meta Knight
Bandana Dee
Gooey
Rick
Kine
Coo
Ribbon
Adeleine
Elfilin
DARK MATTERS
Marx
Magolor
Susie
Taranza
Daroach
Dark Meta Knight
Francisca
Flamberge
Zan Partizanne
Hyness
Galacta Knight
Author's Note: Huh boy. After a lot of back and fourth with myself, I finally decided to post this thing. I'll be honest, I didn't feel like coming up with my own challenges for this, so I'll just be using the challenges from TDI. That way I can focus on the dialogue and character interactions. I'm not 100% sure at this point if I'll ever finish this fic, but I do at least have episodes 1 and 2 ready already, so there's that. I sincerely hope you enjoy, it took a lot of courage to post this.