Sirius is soooo eloquent don't you think

Sirius, once realizing his predicament could only say one thing.

"Fuck"

Charlotte smiled, and Sirius suddenly felt how a mouse must feel when cornered by Mrs. Norris, as she replied "As you wish."

Now Sirius was many things but he was not the type to hit a girl. Hit on, yes, but not hit. The were a number of reasons he would never hit a girl. Reasons he was trying to remember, for none came to mind as the whore forced a sloppy and rather disgusting kiss on him. Sirius was considered the expert in the field of kissing, like a walking encyclopedia on who was good, bad and how to improve on technique, and in his expert opinion he would have to say that was the wort kiss he ever had the misfortune of receiving. This was partly because it sucked and partly because it was Charlotte. He shoved her away as hard and as quickly as he could and scampered, yes Sirius Black just scampered, away from her, trying to put as much distance as possible between him and his would-be rapist.

"What the fuck do you think you're doing? Are you bloody mad." He hissed at her. He didn't want to alert the whole damn House that he, Sirius Black, was being molested. After all, it was always he who did the molesting not the other way around, Remus being exempt for obvious reasons. While he was willing to put his "virtue" as risk he would never do so to his pride, he was a Black after all. Blacks did NOT get molested by ugly twits of girls who stalked them. At least if it happened it would not be public knowledge.

Charlotte smiled in what she obviously thought was a seductive manner. "Getting what I want. What you want as well." Sirius could honestly say that he had no fucking clue what she was talking about. He quickly thought back to their interactions. He had never given her any sort of encouragement or a hint that he wanted her at any point, or so he thought. Maybe she was some sort of verbal masochist or something, the more you tried to discourage her the more she was encouraged. Merlin, Sirius hated those blokes, they made James seem acute, which was saying something. Sirius began to slowly inch away from the mentally deranged witch with his back flattened against the wall to stave off any bum groping.

Charlotte gave a falsetto giggle that Sirius would have loved to mock had he not been the compromising situation that he now found himself in. "Sirius, sweetie, don't try to play coy with me. I had enough of our games, now its time for the reward."

"Games?" Sirius croaked, his voice deserting him, "What bloody games? And the only reward you are going to get if you don't stop this nonsense is a fist in your face." His voice seemed to have come back to him as he continued, "At a very high velocity I might add."

"Ooh, didn't know you liked it rough." She was nearly on top of him again, his face barely out of reach of her claws.

Sirius opened his mouth, not sure what the hell he was going to say to help this delusional girl get a clue when he heard the portrait swing open. I'm saved! Thought the extremely relieved Gryffindor as the portrait swung to reveal his savior, Peter.

Peter froze as he looked at them both and Sirius realized what it may seem like to an observer, especially one who had just come it. It didn't look innocent to say the least. Peter glanced around him, looking more like a trapped rat than Sirius had ever seen him, his arms full of food nicked from the kitchens and a cookie halfway in his mouth. Praying he would understand Sirius sent him a look of pleading and Peter swallowed his cookie with an audible gulp. He mentally berated himself for seeming so desperate, for Merlins sake this was Peter not James or Remus, but he really didn't give a bloody damn about it right now. Charlotte looked at Peter in a measuring manner that soon turned into a death glare, which she was halfway decent at giving (albeit Sirius was loathe to compliment her). Peters eyes widen and he looked like he was about to bolt when he visibly paused. He turned very slowly and, with a look that said "I'm going to regret this", headed cautiously towards them.

"Uh... Sirius...er...I need a...a ... bit of, um help... yeah help! with the..er... transfiguration homework... if your not...," Peter seemed to suppress a smile, "busy." Peter had just given him the perfect way out of this mess. Sirius had never been so glad to see him nor so appreciative of his talents of observation. He leapt at the offer and Charlotte stormed off in a huff. The two boys let her go, not even bothering to hide the enormous relief they were both feeling at the moment.

"I owe you Wormtail." Sirius said in utter gratitude after the witch had gone.

Peter smiled "Well if I didn't help you I'm sure James or Remus would have." Peter turned to go but Sirius stopped him.

"Nah, I think you're it. James would have walked by me in the usual fog he's in and Remus would have thought this as a good lesson of what happens when I lead people on."

"But you never led Charlotte on, did you? I just thought she was a deranged stalker." Peter looked slightly confused. Whenever Charlotte had been near or even mentioned of late, Sirius would get hostile and either changes subject or close up completely. Not the sort of act he put on when trying to seduce someone.

"She is, but not that it would have mattered to Moony, he likes any excuse to deflate my ego. So you're it, Pete, the only one who would save me from the clutches of Gods curse to man, a.k.a Charlotte." He thumped Peter on the back like he did to James, a symbol of comradery that he had never bestowed upon Peter before. Peter beamed. "So let me know if your virtue is ever in danger and I'll come chase away the girl."

Peter laughed as they reached their dorms. "Somehow I doubt that will ever be a problem."

Sirius chuckled as he held the door open for Peter. The rat shook his head and raised his hands as he explained, "I gotta go to the library so I can actually do the Transfiguration homework with some level of success."

Sirius shrugged. "Well tell James to get his arse up here if you see him."

Peter gave a mock salute. "Will do sir. See you later, hey Moony." Peter waved to the only occupant of their dorms as he turned and headed out the way he came, arms still full with food.

Sirius entered the dorms to see Remus smirking at him. He scowled "What, is it that hard to believe that I can have a laugh with Peter?"

Remus crossed his arms, "No, I just can't remember the last time you were so chummy with him. Nice to see you treating him like a friend rather than a follower." He put a not so discreet emphasis on the word 'friend'. Sirius scowled at him a again and sulked over to his bed, muttering.

Remus chuckled slightly, "What was that again..." He trailed of when Sirius walked past him. Sirius turned to him, brow slightly worried. The wolf had a startled and confused look on, as if he smelled something but couldn't place it. Sirius just wrote it off and sat down on his own be, consequently right next to Remus'. He hadn't even undone the rest of his tie, he wore it in a constant state of being halfway done, when something pounded into him. Winded, he looked up to see a very irate werewolf straddling him and staring down with blazing grey eyes tinged with a bit of yellow. Not a good sign. "Who was it?" Remus nearly growled out the question, his voice harsh and raspy, not his usual soft and velvety tone.

Sirius was bewildered and not just a bit disturbed at this turn of events. "Who was who?" He didn't know what he could have done to enraged Remus like this but he made a mental note never to do it again.

"The whore whose scent is all over you?" The grip Remus had on his upper arms was getting to be painful and Sirius was sharply reminded just how strong Remus actually was, despite his frail physique.

"Moony...Rem," Sirius hoped the use of nicknames would jolt his friend from whatever was possessing him, "I was just with Peter...and before that Charlotte cornered me. But there was nothing." The grip tightened again, Sirius winced in pain, and Remus' pupils started to enlarge.

"Don't fuck with me, I can smell the lust all over you." Sirius had never been scared of Remus like he was right now. He had seen him in many moods and what not but never like this, never so taken by his inner wolf over something so small. He was struck with a sudden epiphany; Remus was jealous. He was the first person Remus had kissed, the first person who he bared his soul for. Now he smelled of another with more than a hint of lust (he had never known that lust had a scent and made a mental note to explore that later) and Remus had lost it. He looked up into those grey-yellow eyes and knew that he was not looking at his friend and semi-lover but of the wolf.

Sirius was more terrified than he had ever been in his life.

Interesting turn of events ne? Will update in a week, seriously. Thanks to everyone who reviewed, here are just a two names - EsScaper, moongirlSelene99 - I can't access my reviews cause of damn parental controls and they were the most recent to review so I still have the emailed notice...sorry to everyone else! ;