A/N: I'm still not lifting the veil of mystery in this chapter, but fear not, more than just hints are coming your way! Enjoy!
The Sound of Pain: Chapter 4
The third time Sasuke wakes is even better than the last. He stirs and wakes to an eyeful of very nicely shaped, large breasts bent over him. The attractive cleavage bounces lightly with the movement of the female and Sasuke slowly tears his eyes away from the twins to look up at the Hokage. He smirks at the focused and annoyed look on her face.
Her hands are over his stomach, forcing healing faster and of the large, life-threatening injury that tore his stomach before, only a manageably deep cut remains. It doesn't hurt for the moment, but Sasuke knows it will. It's the first time he's aware enough to take account of his own health. It's the first time he's able to feel surprise at still being alive. The memory of the fight hasn't quite come back to Sasuke, but all of his instincts whisper that he should be dead. He should be dead because he failed.
Distantly, Sasuke wonders how long Tsunade has been working on him. Kabuto would require at least two days to get the same result. He ponders thanking her, but this woman has his future in her hands. He's not going to be begging for favors.
She's too focused to notice that he's awake, but Sasuke can see Kakashi's sharp eye on him. He meets his gaze with a look of his own, something that's not quite a glare, not quite a thank you.
The Hokage grumbles under her breath, interrupting the meeting of stares. "Why did you dispell the henge, Kakashi? If anyone were to stumble in here they'd recognize him in a second!"
Kakashi opens his mouth to reply but whatever he was about to say is cut with Sasuke's next words, "What if I was the one to dispell it?"
Three eyes turn to fully focus on him and Sasuke feels just like he did when talking with Orochimaru. Like every word he says will be overanalysed and picked apart. Like every word he says can have devastating consequences.
So he keeps his mouth shut from there.
Tsunade, quite annoyed at the interruption, straightens up from her bent position (unfortunately removing the lovely sight of her breasts) and she sneers, "You can hardly even move, much less summon chakra."
Sasuke wordlessly raises a hand, looking at his fingertips. He is far from defenceless. The question now is whether or not he wants her to know it (Kakashi already knows). He supposes it might be a sign of good will to show her.
He closes his eyes and summons a high concentration of chakra to his middle finger and thumb, then snaps his fingers, producing a small yellow flame.
"Kakashi, leave us." Her voice holds all the authority a woman in her position can summon and Sasuke is relieved. She sounds nothing like Orochimaru. She doesn't even smell dangerous. Too soft-hearted. Too motherly. She's a healer, a caretaker. She's smart but not as objective, not as sharp as Orochimaru.
His former-teacher bows and turns to exit. On sheer power, Kakashi might not be able to take on the untameable force of Tsunade, but Sasuke thinks it's a little ridiculous for him to bow to someone who he could obviously outthink.
Still, Sasuke supposes Tsunade is Hokage for a reason. So when Kakashi leaves, he fully focuses on her. The burgeoning pain in his stomach is easy to ignore and the memories of whatever past he can't remember right now are of little to no importance at all. This will be a fight, and Sasuke won't lose it.
Tsunade gives a sigh as she looks at the stoically challenging boy in the bed. He's taken so much of Orochimaru with him that she almost feels nostalgic. She almost feels the longing for when her teammate was still her teammate. She pulls one of Kakashi's too-hard and too-straight chairs forward, then sits herself down by his bedside.
Her eyes meet Sasuke's and there's a lot in that gaze. There's resentment and respect and acknowledgment of the other's power. Tsunade has no idea whatsoever of where to start. What to ask him first. About Yahide's team? Orochimaru's almost unexistant activities in the past six months? What about mind-body transfer? Did it succeed? Is she somehow speaking to someone that's part Uchiha, part Orochimaru? What happened to him at Sound? Where is it? Who was that blond-haired girl at the crime scene? Why, where, how did he escape? How was he wounded?
Sasuke shakes his head mutely, a silent refusal to cooperate. There's just enough memory (Tayuya) to know that he can't (Bijin) tell the Hokage anything about (Itachi) what happened to him.
And so Tsunade has her first question. If the boy won't talk, she'll break down his facade and make him slip up. "Who was the redhead?"
Eyes drawn sharply to Tsunade's in a split second, Sasuke feels like he was slapped. Is this how you want to play it? He works at controlling his grief, the barrier of cool lasting long enough to lock up the memory of the fiery Tayuya. His answer is still a little broken, despite it all, "Just a pretty no one."
Using the memory of the dead against a fifteen year old boy. Tsunade feels a cheap for it, but it should serve its goal. "Was she a lover, then? How did she die?"
Sasuke turns from Tsunade, facing the blank wall. His mind is bringing up images, thoughts, feelings and memories. He'll be damned if Tsunade gets information out of him through cruelty. Maybe she thinks it's the only thing he knows, but it's not. It's the only thing he knows how to fight. So he clenches his jaw and glares a hole through the wall, Sharingan reflexively activated in fury.
"Fuck you, Hokage-sama."
"You little brat, do you realise what I could do to you? I could have you locked up for the rest of your life, I could have you tortured. I hold your future in the palm of my hand so don't you test me." Tsunade's tone is threatening, but her posture is relaxed enough. She's testing how far the boy will go and doesn't intend in the least to follow up on any of those threats.
"And you'd do it?" Sasuke turns flashing eyes to hers. He derisively sneers, "How pathetic. You're not worthy of the Hokage title if you can't think around even the simplest obstacles... No fucking wonder Orochimaru thought so little of you."
Tsunade grinds her teeth at that. She remembers Orochimaru and his easy dismissal of her. It's a slap in the face, one that rivals the question about the redhead. A small smile graces Tsunade's lips at that. She's not going to lose to a boy of fifteen, no matter how smart he is. Her tone shifts from defiantly threatening to soothingly pleasant in a split second, "Uchiha Sasuke, one of my best scout teams was slaughtered. I will not let this crime go unpunished. You are our last and only true witness and you will give me an account of what happened." Her tone is still pleasant, but inevitably commanding. "I won't send more shinobi to their deaths without knowing about our opponent. That is all I ask of you for the time being."
With more majesty than Sasuke believed possible, the fifth Hokage stands and exits the room.
When she's closed the door and walked to Kakashi's kitchen, she sighs and growls to herself. She isn't supposed to let the boy get to her. She's supposed to test him and prod him and get to him. Not the other way around. At least she managed to walk away from that meeting with the upper hand, but that crack about Orochimaru...
Tsunade wonders if it was wise to purposefully provoke the boy's animosity. After all, she wants him to cooperate.
"How did it go?" Kakashi's voice is comfortingly cool and rational and it brings Tsunade out of her thoughts.
"He's a handful. Almost as much as that bratty fox." Through the talk, the boy has been slippery enough, reminescent of Orochimaru himself, but colder, less inclined to manipulation. Tsunade could see something she never saw in Orochimaru. She saw reluctance and anger and honor. The boy is hurt. But he can be healed.
Kakashi nods, trying not to smile. The Hokage is starting to see what Kakashi sees. She's starting to see Sasuke Uchiha in all his stubborn, defiant and blinded glory. "If I may offer my opinion, Hokage-sama..."
"Please do. You're the one who knows the most about him after all."
"I think the rest of Team Seven would be most apt at dealing with him. Maybe even get an actual report on what happened." Kakashi words that bit carefully, knowing the reluctance Tsunade will show the very notion.
As predicted, Tsunade stiffens. She's not sure she should expose her student and the boy that's like a little brother to her to the menace Sasuke has undoubtedly become. But on the other hand... the possible benefits are immense. She curtly nods, "I'll consider it."
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"So that was you. Kissing me."
A shamed nod of the head, "Yes."
"That was you, kicking me."
The head drops even lower, "Yes."
"To figure out whether you were gay."
This time Lee can't help the flush. "Yes."
Neji sighs and pats Lee's bowed head. He can't stay angry with him. Hell, anger doesn't suit a Hyuuga any way you look at it. Lee's a good friend who despite himself, Neji admires. Besides, Lee doesn't have a single malicious bone in his body. He was probably truly confused and offput and when help offered itself, was too much off-balance to refuse. So no, Neji isn't angry at Lee.
Naruto, however, has no such excuse. But Naruto isn't the one confessing with the fear to have ruined their friendship. No, Naruto isn't the one bowing his head apologetically and offering self-punishment. But he should be. He will be.
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Sasuke has stayed awake and a little stunned after the departure of the Hokage. He ponders his position and the chances of making it out of Konoha. He wonders if he even wants to leave. Little pieces of information are coming back and Sasuke just isn't sure what the best option is right now.
His eyes trace the sparse furniture around the room. It's undeniably Kakashi in every small thing. The chairs are too straight, the bed is too soft, the table richly furnished with all types of scrolls and books. Tasteful isn't in the man's vocabulary. The only real decorations around the room are the pictures (if you don't count the chain of kunai, swords and scrolls). There are two pinned beside the bed and Sasuke can't tear his eyes away from Team Seven, years earlier. Kakashi's lazy smile, Sakura's smitten look, Naruto's perpetually silly, angry look towards him. But what really surprises Sasuke the most is looking at himself. He sees his sideways glance at Naruto and the feeling there isn't quite anger, annoyance or fondness. It's almost content in its complexity.
"They miss you, you know?" The voice shouldn't have made him jump. Not after every goddamn time Orochimaru did it to him. But Sasuke nonetheless jerks away from his fascinated contemplation of years past and turns accusingly towards Kakashi.
"I never gave them anything to miss." Which should have been true but...
"That's a lie, Sasuke." Feeling unbearably naked in front of Kakashi's stare, Sasuke glares at him. His mouth is kept stubbornly shut and he tugs the covers up to his neck.
Kakashi smiles gently and takes the seat Tsunade just discarded. "Well, who cares after all, neh? Life goes on. With or without Uchiha Sasuke."
That last sentence really drives home the fear that's been eating up Sasuke ever since he recognized he was at Kakashi's home, back in Konoha. It's selfish and hurtful and probably cruel but Sasuke wants his leaving to have meant something to someone. He wants someone to miss him, wants someone to be hurt and to want him back. He wants to matter to someone. Ever since he came back he's been deathly afraid of finding out that, to the people who despite everything still matter to him, he was nothing anymore. He was scared that they'd found a replacement and just forgot about him. Life goes on. With or without Sasuke.
Sasuke's eyes are burning in an unfamiliar way and he can only growl at Kakashi, "Leave me alone, Kakashi. Just fucking let me be." He curls up on himself as much as his wound will allow and for some reason, Ren comes to mind. Eyelids fall shut with much more strength than necessary, as though by squeezing his eyes tight enough, Sasuke won't be able to remember his last words. He won't see Tayuya, he won't remember Orochimaru's smirking syringe, he won't see Itachi over his parent's bodies, he won't see the girl in the coffin and the children of Sound.
A gentle hand in his hair shocks him out of his memories and Sasuke flinches away. He looks up at Kakashi, eyes unknowingly damp, and murmurs, "Do you get off on kicking people when they're down? Or is it just for me?"
"I missed you, too." It's just the right amount of relief to break him. It's just right.
Sasuke hides his head under the covers and mumbles hoarsely, "I hate you."
Kakashi lets his hand rest on top of the covers, just the indirect contact enough to let Sasuke know he's here.
Sasuke can feel its warmth through the blanket, settling into the middle of his back. He gives a shuddering sigh, then focuses on his breathing. In. Out. Slow. Careful. His heartbeat is next. One beat, another. Even. Calm. It takes a few minutes, but when Sasuke looks up, he's fully in control of himself.
"Can you get me a pen and paper, Kakashi?"
Kakashi removes his hand and walks out of the room, only to come back seconds later with both requested items and a glass of water. He ruffles Sasuke's hair, because he can, then grabs a book from under the mattress Sasuke is settled on, flipping the pages as he exits the room.
Sasuke is left with a sore heart, a sore mind and a messed up hairdo. If Kakashi didn't feel so much like himself, it'd be much easier to pretend he doesn't matter.
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In another part of town, silence is slowly killing Team Eight. Kiba is staring at his food without energy. Shino stands stoically beside him, watching closely. Hinata fidgets, feeling the tension climbing and climbing.
The bug user is worried. His silence is the overbearing type that makes people feel watched and monitered. Kiba hasn't said a word since he came back from that mission. He hasn't jumped on top of a table and he didn't try to race Shino to any sort of destination. Kiba isn't being Kiba and that's more than enough cause for worry. Hinata is no doubt angsting, wondering what she can do to make things better. Shino sighs (silently) and gives Kiba's shoulder a nudge.
The dog-lover barely grunts in reply.
This is odd. Kiba's boisterous voice isn't filling the void of silence left by the other two members with mocking blabber. His loud and brash proclaims that Shino just touched him voluntarily aren't making the bug-user twitch in annoyance. This isn't just odd, it's wrong.
In his dark voice, Shino says, completely void of expression, "So two roaches munch on garbage in an alley. One says: 'I was in that new restaurant across the street. It's so clean. It's actually so sanitary the whole place shines.' 'Please,' the other roach says, 'Not while I'm eating'."
Kiba chokes on what he was pretending to eat and looks up at Shino with disbelief written all over him.
A stunned silence follows.
"Shino... Did you just crack a joke?"
A curt nod.
"Holy fuck that was bad!" And Kiba laughs, wholeheartedly and loud enough to forget he was silent for an entire day. Hinata joins him with a few shy giggles and even Shino smiles under his collar. Things might not be quite right, but they will be.
tbc...
Some replies:
ShadowBright: Sweetheart, you take as much time as you need, I'll take what I can get, hee! (love)
XxHunter The One and OnlyxX: Lol! Here it is, here it is! Please don't spork me... Pretty please? (grin)