disclaimer: I do not own firefly. Actually, I do. But seriously, I don't.
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Mal was slumped against the wall, sulky and pouty like a fifteen year old who wasn't getting his way. Kaylee and River seemed pleased as punch, but Mal was having none of it. Granted, it was a great idea and hilarious, but that didn't mean he had to like it.
"You ready?" Kaylee asked, smiling widely.
"I still don't get why I gotta-"
"I want to learn. I want everyone to learn. It'll be fun."
"I know how to dance."
"Then you'll be good at it, won't you?" She was determined for him to be a part of this. Not only was it a part of his scheme to get back at Simon and Jayne, but what else did they all have to do? Floating through space left many opportunities to find something interesting and unusual to do.
Simon walked in, looking a bit haggard but hid it with a forced smile. "Okay," he announced, "I'm here."
"Yay!" Kaylee clapped her hands and at once was in position before him. "I wanna dance like a lady."
"Well, what do you want to learn? Waltz, samba? Did you have something more specific in mind?"
"Any and all, please."
"Any and all please." He shrugged wearily, then placed a hand on her hip and took her hand in his.
It was going very well, and within ten minutes Simon was spinning Kaylee across the floor like a pro. She was giggling and twirling around drunkly, her eyes twinkling. As planned, Zoe brought Jayne into the cargo area and watched the spectacle from high above their heads.
"We having a party no one told me about?" Zoe called down.
Mal looked up at her. "Doc's teaching us dancing for some reason."
"You're dancing?' She arched her pretty eyebrow at him, smirking.
"Shut up, you. You gonna join us?"
"I don't think so."
"Aw, go on, Zoe," Jayne teased. "Don't you wanna put on a cupcake dress and get tossed around the dance floor by some stiff?"
"Why don't you?" she shot back.
"Zoe! Jayne!" Kaylee demanded, "Get down here and dance!"
Zoe exchanged a weird look with Jayne, who shook his head. Laughing to herself, Zoe went downstairs and stood beside the sulky Mal. "What are we learning?"
"Waltz, at the moment." He smiled at her with the corners of his mouth. "When did my ship turn into a ballroom, I'd like to know."
"When Kaylee stepped on board."
"Jayne!" Kaylee yelled, breaking away from Simon, "Come down here! I want to show you what I learned!"
"All right," he grumbled, "but I ain't gonna like it." He tromped heavily down the stairs and Kaylee wrapped his arms around her. He smiled. Well, least there were a few perks. But after only seven steps, Kaylee stopped twirling herself while Jayne stumbled around as best he cared.
"Damn!" she cursed. "I forgot what comes next."
"I'll help," River offered, grabbing the mechanic and spinning her across the floor.
"Hey!" Jayne protested, "who am I s'posed to twirl around?"
Mal grabbed Zoe around the waist and pulled her close. She gave him the most confused and possibly dangerous look she'd given someone since her late husband had told her he was thinking of regrowing the mustache again. "Didn't wanna end up with Jayne," he explained to her, and she rolled her eyes good-naturedly. "Come on," he said in a deep, sexy voice, "let's tango."
"Hey!" Jayne yelled again. So what if he hadn't even wanted to dance? That wasn't the point. He didn't like being left out. "Who do I got?"
"Simon!" River yelled, and she and Kaylee giggled in each other's arms.
Simon shrugged. "No," Jayne told him flatly.
"Oh, come on, Jayne," Simon teased. "I sewed your pants, doesn't that make me woman enough to dance with?"
"Well… All right." He stood up straight, holding his arms out loosely. "I get to be the guy, right?"
"I dunno… Jayne is a girl's name, isn't it?"
"I dunno," Jayne said mockingly, "ain't Simon a dead man's name?"
"Okay, you lead," Simon agreed readily, just like they had planned. He put Jayne's hand on his lower back, put it back when Jayne pulled it away and made a face, and attempted to teach someone the waltz backwards. It was a lot harder than he had ever anticipated. Everyone else laughed at them a few times, but eventually they were all busy spinning off to wherever their partner lead them.
In the northern corner (north being a relative term, since there is no north in space), Mal and Zoe were watching over each other's shoulders at Jayne and Simon. "He's got a good grip on that doctor," Mal was whispering. "You think they even needed our help?"
"I don't know. Look at them go, though. Simon's good, I don't care what the reason. If he can teach Jayne, he can teach a monkey."
"Same thing," Mal told her, moving his hand a bit lower on her back. She looked up at him, startled. This was the first time their eyes had really met since he'd seen her naked. She noticed his face was older, a lot older than it should look. He was still handsome, though. He was quite handsome despite everything he'd been through. Their bodies moved fluidly together, their eyes locked, their arms tight around one another. It was beautiful.
So much, in fact, River stopped Kaylee and stared at them, surprised. "Look," she whispered. Kaylee did, and smiled fondly, pushing River back into motion. "Not polite to stare," she told her.
Meanwhile, on the south side (again, being in space) Jayne and Simon were doing a lot better than Simon had expected. "This is almost amazing," Simon marveled. "I can't believe how… graceful you are."
Jayne, however, just shrugged. "Been doing this since I was a kid."
"Wait, are you serious?"
"Sure. My ma liked it, and she had no one else to do it with since my pa was usually working. So, I learned." He smiled proudly at Simon's stunned face. "What, Neanderthals can't dance?"
"Well, it's just-"
"Can tango if you like."
"Are you serious?"
"Find out sometime." With a strong flick of his wrist, he flung Simon out onto the floor, then twirled him back in and threw him back into a low, perfect dip. As poor Simon caught his bearings, Jayne smirked cockily. Simon's breath caught, Jayne's breath caressing his cheek softly. They looked at one another steadily. "Think this plan's working," Jayne said at last, nodding his head toward the other side of the room. His eyes never left Simon's.
Simon leaned his head back, and although upside down from his point of view, he could clearly see Mal and Zoe looking at one another with some discovered interest.
Jayne pulled the doctor upright, holding him close for a few seconds. "If we're all done here," he said coyly, and strutted off to his room.
Simon touched his forehead, trying to focus himself. What had just happened? He had been dancing, or something, and then… he hadn't been. Had he? There had been too much spinning, he was dizzy.
"That was amazing," Kaylee gushed, and just now he realized she was standing behind him, River in tow. "You must be a real good teacher if even Jayne could make it look so easy."
"Yeah," Simon agreed, although to what he forgot. "Look at Mal and Zoe, though. This was a great idea, Kaylee." Yes, it had been a great idea. He felt really nice, so it must have been a damn good idea.
As soon and Simon had left the cargo area, Mal and Zoe approached their fellow schemers. "You see that?" Mal asked excitedly. "I didn't really think this was possible, but… I'm starting to."
"Yeah," Zoe agreed. "Kaylee, this was a great idea." She and Mal walked off together, heading toward the kitchen for dinner preparation.
Kaylee grinned at River, and River grinned right back.