Moving On

Chapter 10 - It's just a walk

So that's what we do and it's strange how it feels. I can't remember a time when Dean and I ever went for a walk in the country that wasn't to check out some evil entity. The only other visit would have been on a training run.

We've been walking about twenty minutes in an easy silence when Dean suddenly says, "You need to tell me about any other dreams?"

It catches me by surprise but I have time enought to know that as sincere as he is, as much as he is asking because he is worried about me, he couldn't take any more details right now. The content of my dreams cut too close to things that are painful for him. We've talked a lot today, he's admitted a lot despite the playing down. Bobby was right last night. If I listen, Dean does tell me, answer me. If I think about it, I know when he's playing it down and I can pick the truth from the stories he tells.

"Nah. I'm good."

"Okay Sam. For the record though, I don't believe you but I'm not going to argue the point. You know where to find me when you want to talk."

"Yeah thanks. Same goes for you too, you know." The silence resumes as we head back for the car. It's comfortable though. We're fine and Dean seems more relaxed now.

I can see the car when Dean speaks next. "I think that's a first."

"Sorry?"

"The walk. I don't think I've ever just walked like that. Not checking something out, not planning a job, not training, just a walk!"

I can't help but laugh. "What's so funny?" he says.

"I was thinking the same thing."

"Weird. We've been spending too much time together, bro."

We settle back in the car and I start the engine up. As I pull away, he says, "So Rosie, what do you reckon?"

"What do you mean, what do I reckon?"

"Go for it? Or have you got your eye on someone else?"

"No eyes on anyone, Dean."

"So Rosie then. She's interested, you know. She was always asking after you when I was in the hospital. She's single, cute, what more could you ask?"

"Dean, I'm not looking for a relationship."

"I'm not suggesting you marry her, just go out, maybe a nice meal, a film, something normal. You don't need to spend all your free time hanging with Bobby and me."

"What about you?"

"In what sense?"

"If I went out, what would you be doing?"

"I've got plenty to do - read, watch TV, sleep, stuff on the laptop, there's jobs I could do around the house for Bobby. I can keep myself occupied Sammy."

"What about going out? Meeting people?"

"Not yet, Sam, huh. Just... I can't, okay?" as he speaks he turns to the window. I can see the tension creeping back into his shoulders.

"Okay. So you think Rosie might be interested in going out with me?" I turn the conversation back to me, hoping to take the pressure away from him and stop the rising tension.

It works. "I do and I have her number for you so there's nothing holding you back now."

"I'll think about it."

He sounds almost like himself when he says, "You think too much. Sometimes you have to throw caution to the wind and go with it." I throw him a 'look' and he smiles gently. "Just dinner Sam. Give it a go. You never know you might enjoy it."

I acquiesce and his smile grows wider.